


Burn the Stars

by mg344



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: F/F, Relationship(s), Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-20
Updated: 2019-03-27
Packaged: 2019-04-25 11:11:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 13
Words: 90,095
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14377419
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mg344/pseuds/mg344
Summary: Pearl struggles to understand how she feels for Amethyst as the Crystal Gems await expected retaliation from Home world. But when the enemy makes their move, it’s Amethyst who loses the most.





	1. Hazy

**Author's Note:**

> After spending some time kicking around on Tumblr, I decided to start adding this here. This is a Pearlmethyst work (Amethyst/Pearl) but there is also some Holly Blue Agate/Amethyst 8XJ thrown in the background.

There was a storm brewing on the horizon. It seemed oddly appropriate to Pearl, who was observing it from her perch atop the Temple Gem’s hand. A looming, foreboding storm seemed to reflect how she was feeling inside, though she’d tried to ignore it. Following the days and weeks since their return from space, things had settled down considerably. After so much time on high-alert, the return to normalcy was appreciated, but to Pearl it felt unearned. 

Nothing about their situation had changed in the slightest. Home world was still a threat. There was an underlying sense of dread that had settled over their small group of ragtag rebels. Morale was low and tensions were high, although each gem seemed to be dealing with it privately rather than speak their fears out loud. The air just felt… heavy. And it had nothing to do with the humidity.

Turning her gaze from the horizon, Pearl tried to work quickly to remove the laundry from the clothesline before the rain started. The sky directly overhead was a bright and towering blue, but in the distance, she could see dark clouds hovering over the ocean. They were coming in fast. The wind was warm, but picking up, threatening to snatch the clothes off the line if she wasn’t fast enough. The oncoming storm seemed to have a weight to it and there was a feeling of building pressure that Pearl couldn’t be certain she was imagining or truly feeling.

Behind her, Pearl heard the warp pad activate and she turned to the sound. One of Steven’s shirts slipped from her grasp as she was momentarily distracted. The wind, as though waiting for its chance, snatched the shirt away from her with a sudden burst and carried it up and over her head. Pearl tried to grab for it with a jump, but she swiped at empty air. “Oh no!”

Amethyst, who had arrived on the warp pad and had been the cause of Pearl’s distraction, shapeshifted her arm up to grab the shirt and bring it back down. Pearl held her hand out for it but Amethyst took the shirt against her chest and folded it neatly before she put it in the laundry basket with the others.

“Need some help?” she inquired, casually.

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen you fold a shirt so neatly before, Amethyst!” Pearl exclaimed, teasing just a little. She grinned and took another down from the clothesline. Again the wind tried to take it, but she held tighter.

“Yeah well, ’m just fulla surprises, I guess,” Amethyst drawled. She gave Pearl a half smile.

“If I’d known that, I would’ve roped you into laundry duty a long time ago.” 

“Eh, sometimes I just pretend I can’t do stuff so you won’t ask me to,” Amethyst admitted, her smile widening. Pearl scowled and Amethyst cackled. “Kidding!”

“No you’re not!” Pearl pouted while Amethyst laughed. In spite of herself, Pearl cracked a smile, too.

“I’m nearly done,” she told the purple gem, annoyance dissipating. “Just trying to get everything inside before the rain starts. Did you check all the windows, like I asked?” 

Amethyst stood straight, locking her legs together as she stiffly performed the Diamond salute with mock seriousness. “All windows closed and locked, sir!”

Pearl raised an eyebrow at that. “If you’re going for authenticity, then I’m sorry to tell you, but gems don’t address their superiors as ‘sir’,” she stated. Not that an Amethyst would ever be saluting a Pearl in such a way on Homeworld. If Amethyst had been under her command, somehow, she supposed Amethyst would’ve addressed her as “My Pearl” or perhaps “Your Iridescence” or “Your Lustrousness”. The thought was comical to her and Pearl couldn’t help but giggle, although she tried to delicately hide it with her hand. 

Amethyst remained in her position, trying not to crack up laughing as well. Her shoulders were shaking with the effort.

“You call that a salute, soldier?” Pearl asked, trying to do her best Agate impression. “Back straight! And what kind of uniform is that? You shame our Diamond with your insolence!” She stepped up to Amethyst and gave her the very lightest of taps with her foot, on the shin. 

“Oof!” Amethyst cried, sagging for a moment like she was in pain before she straightened once more. “Yes, Pearl! Sorry, Pearl!”

“You are to address me as 'Your Iridescence’, you halfwit!” Pearl barked.

Amethyst rolled her eyes. “Oh yeah, like you’re not smug enough already.”

Pearl giggled again. “Okay, no more of that.”

Amethyst grinned, dropping the salute. “Do I make a good Amethyst?” she asked. 

“Of course. You’d fit right in with the others at the zoo,” Pearl chuckled.

“Really?” Amethyst asked, eyes lighting up.

“Mm. Yes, but it would be unacceptable if you were there,” Pearl decided. “Because we’d miss you, too much. Well, Steven would, at least.” 

“Aw… Well, I wouldn’t go, duh. But nice to know I have other job options if Rebel Defect doesn’t pan out.” Amethyst snickered. “And you could be a good Agate. You’re so stern. I think you’re probably a little bit too good at acting…”

“I don’t know if I have it in me to beat on other gems all the time,” Pearl mused, though it certainly conjured up an interesting visual. Herself, standing in an Agate’s uniform, before a lineup of very sorry-looking quartzes that she was going to have to whip into shape.

“What, you mean besides me?” Amethyst asked.

“Oh come on, I don’t beat on you!” Pearl cried, a little offended by the insinuation that she was violent with Amethyst, even if Amethyst had only meant it in jest. Truthfully, Pearl couldn’t even remember the last specific incident where they’d gotten into a real brawl.

“I’m just kidding,” Amethyst answered. 

“I’ll start beating on you if you keep it up!” Pearl warned, finding herself grinning again. “You’re gonna get a smack.”

“Ooh, really? Promise?” Amethyst asked. “Am I allowed to request where I get smacked?” She laughed and ducked when Pearl tried to swipe at her. “Oh! You’re so aggressive!”

“You’re terrible!” Pearl exclaimed. “What would Garnet say?”

“I dunno, I think she’d be into it.”

Pearl huffed but honestly, Garnet probably would side with Amethyst. They were so naughty. Garnet didn’t crack wise to the extent that Amethyst did, but they did share some similarities in that regard. She hoped they didn’t behave inappropriately in front of Steven, at least.

A cold, fat raindrop splashed onto the end of Pearl’s nose and she turned her gaze skyward, surprised to see that the storm was right on top of them. A maelstrom of dark clouds slowly churned above their heads. The wind continued to rage.

“I felt a raindrop!” Amethyst announced, holding her hand out. 

“I did, too. Let’s get inside before we get blown out to sea” she said, hastily. She plucked the last few items of clothing off the line and tossed them into the basket without bothering to fold them. She lifted it and held it under one arm, balancing it against her hip. The wind had a wet spray to it and Pearl winced as a sheet of icy rain suddenly began to descend on them, creating a deafening rumble all around them. “Eeek! The clothes!” she cried.

“C'mon!” Amethyst laughed. She grasped Pearl’s free hand and tugged her to the warp pad, activating it and bringing them out of the storm and into the temple.

Pearl gave her head a shake, but she hadn’t gotten too wet. Any longer, and they’d have both gotten drenched, along with the clothes. Pearl worriedly checked the basket. A few drops had landed, but they were relatively dry. She gave a sigh of relief.

“Did we make it?” Amethyst asked. 

“Yes, for the most part. You distracted me!” Pearl accused.

Amethyst just gave her a lopsided grin. “My bad.”

“No harm done, I suppose…” Pearl decided. She smiled at Amethyst. Amethyst smiled back. Pearl felt Amethyst’s thumb slowly stroke the outside of her hand, where it was touching. Pearl realized they were still holding hands.

“Did you guys get rained on?” Steven inquired as he jogged over to the warp pad. Pearl and Amethyst both automatically dropped each other’s hand and Pearl quickly set her unoccupied hand on the edge of the laundry basket.

“We just made it,” Pearl answered. She raised her head, able to see the rain falling through the window. It was falling so hard, everything looked misted over.

Amethyst whistled. “It’s really coming down.”

“At least it’ll break up some of this mugginess,” Pearl commented.

Steven and Amethyst crowded themselves around the front window to watch like a pair of over-eager children.

Pearl headed up the steps to Steven’s room. She put the laundry basket on Steven’s bed. Lion was curled up on the mattress and he raised his head, sleepily, to acknowledge her presence. With a yawn and a rumble, Lion stretched leisurely and then rolled over onto his back with paws in the air. The beast let out a long sigh. 

“Oh yes, it must’ve been a tough day for you, Lion,” Pearl said. 

Lion opened his eyes to look at her and he puffed out a breath, looking less than amused. Then he rolled away from her. 

“Not going to dignify that with a response, hm?” Pearl asked him. Lion flicked his tail.

Pearl started to put the clothes away when she heard Steven heading up the stairs. 

“I’ll do it, Pearl!” he volunteered.

Pearl stood by as Steven took the laundry basket and began putting his own clothes away. Pearl looked a bit lost at having her task taken from her.

“Ah, okay…” she agreed. Then she remembered herself. “Yes, that’s a good idea, Steven. You really should be able to put your own clothes away, by now.” 

Steven grinned proudly at her and Pearl walked by him, hand momentarily touching the top of his head as she passed, before she headed back downstairs. Amethyst was still at the window, her face pressed against the glass. Garnet had joined them in the common area and she was sitting on the couch, one ankle crossed over the opposite thigh. She gave Pearl a nod of acknowledgement.

“Come on, Amethyst,” Pearl said as she came up behind her. “I just cleaned that window…”

Amethyst sat back from it, looking over her shoulder at Pearl. Sure enough, Amethyst had left a nose imprint on the glass. Although, right next to hers was one left by Steven. Pearl shooed her away from the window so that she could attack it with a paper towel and glass cleaner.

“Done!” Steven called as he came back down the stairs, a few minutes later. 

Pearl was putting the glass cleaner back in the supply closet. “That was fast…” she observed, suspiciously. “Is it really all done?”

Steven faltered, looking momentarily unsure of himself. But then Amethyst appeared next to him, slinging an arm around his shoulder. 

“Aw, lay off him, P! Who cares what his clothes look like?”

“Well then, you can iron for him when his clothes come out wrinkled,” Pearl said. 

“Sure I will!” Amethyst answered, tugging Steven closer to bump him against her for a moment. 

The rain continued, and it was Steven who suggested they play a board game to pass the time. He eagerly took one from off the shelf and brought the box over to the living room table, setting it down. The gems sat around the table; Garnet and Pearl on the couch, Amethyst and Steven on the floor. Pearl was quick to take control of the game manual and read over the rules. The afternoon progressed quickly, and soon all the gems were getting into the game. Even Pearl would admit that the atmosphere of friendly competition was infectious.

In one instance, Amethyst won several points and she stood up and did a silly, if slightly wanton-looking victory dance. Pearl and Steven stifled their giggles. Even Garnet got into it, engaging in some trash talk with Amethyst and Steven. In the end, Pearl barely cared who was winning. She could feel the building tension beginning to drain, and it felt like a weight was being slowly lifted from her shoulders. It reminded her of the way things were before; before the Diamonds, before Lapis Lazuli, before the Cluster, when things were just day to day events. Nothing was looming and there was no sense of impending dread. Pearl reminded herself to savor the simple moments, because she felt as though there were so few left for any of them. 

Since the heavy clouds made it look dim outside anyways, none of the gems noticed the passing of time until Steven’s growling stomach interrupted the game. He blushed and put his hands over his abdomen, self consciously. Amethyst snickered. 

“Uhh… mind if we take a food break?” Steven asked with a chuckle. 

Pearl glanced at the wall clock and gasped. “It’s gotten so late!” she cried. Several hours had passed them all by and in the stillness of the house, rain falling heavily outside, no one had noticed. The game was put on hold while Steven excused himself and wandered into the kitchen to get something to eat. 

“Yo, Ste-man!” Amethyst called to him. “Get me a sugar shock, would ya?” 

“Get me one too,” Garnet said. Pearl looked surprised. 

Steven leaned back from the open fridge, two canned drinks in his arms. He looked at Pearl expectantly. “Pearl?” 

“None for me, thanks,” Pearl declined. Then she paused and added, “And Steven, make sure you eat something besides sugar for dinner?” 

Steven rolled his eyes but he smiled, regardless. “Yeaaaah.” 

With the interruption in the flow of the game, it felt to Pearl a bit like a spell had been broken. She suddenly felt the urge to stand up and stretch her limbs. She’d been sitting for hours. So she did so, getting to her feet and groaning as she did a couple of stretches. 

“Nghn, I can’t believe I haven’t done anything productive today,” she said, bemused. 

“We all spent time together,” Garnet pointed out. “That’s just as important.” 

“Ah, that’s true,” Pearl agreed, her cheeks coloring. “Of course.”

Steven returned to the living room to pass out the drinks. Garnet took hers and didn’t open it. Amethyst opened hers right away and chugged half of it in one go before she wiped her mouth with the back of her hand.

“This is nice,” Steven said, sitting himself back down next to Amethyst while he waited for the oven to preheat. “I mean, that we did this. We never just… sit around and hang out anymore.” There was a hint of melancholy in Steven’s voice. The other gems were quiet as they thought about what that meant. Things had gotten so big, so fast. It felt like there was scarcely a moment to breathe, let alone spend hours together playing a board game. 

“Well,” Garnet began. “We’ll have to make sure to do this more often, then.”

Pearl smiled, sadly. “Yes…” she agreed. “That’s a good idea. We’ll make more time for…” she trailed off. “…ahem, family things.” 

The entire discussion felt forced to all of them. The tension momentarily resettled over the four. Pearl hated that she found herself wondering if this was one of the last times they’d all be together like this. She gripped one of her arms, digging her fingertips in until it hurt.

Once Steven got some dinner in him, the game proceeded with a bit less enthusiasm before. Eventually they decided to call it quits and it got packed up and put away. Steven dismissed himself to complete his bedtime ritual. Pearl picked up the empty soda cans in the living room. She passed by the window where the rain was still falling, and she paused to look out. It was fully dark by that point. A flash of lightning briefly lit up the beach and it was followed shortly by a rumble of thunder.

Garnet had left to her room after saying goodnight. Amethyst was still lingering in the living room. She’d seated herself on the couch. Pearl glanced her way before she went to the sink to rinse out the cans. 

“You know,” Pearl spoke. “You really should be doing this, not me. These are all yours.” 

To Pearl’s surprise, Amethyst started to get up from the couch. “Yeah, sure,” she agreed, sounding distracted. “Sorry.” 

“Oh, no… I was just… it’s fine,” Pearl said, awkwardly. “I mean, I’m already doing it, so…” 

“Oh.” Amethyst sat back down. “Okay. I guess I’ll just owe you one.” 

Pearl tossed the cans into the recycling bin. Steven was still in the bathroom. Pearl could hear the shower running. 

“What are you up to this evening?” Pearl inquired as she returned to the living room. She took a seat next to Amethyst on the couch. 

“Me? I dunno, maybe I’ll go walk in the rain or something,” Amethyst replied with a nonchalant shrug. “Maybe some cool junk washed up on the beach.”

“Hm… you’d better not track mud in here,” Pearl warned, squinting at her. Amethyst grinned. 

“Oh yeah? What if I do? You won’t smack me, will you?” She wiggled her eyebrows.

Pearl pressed her mouth into a thin line, resisting the urge to laugh. She didn’t want to give Amethyst the satisfaction. But if she was being honest, the smaller gem just didn’t wear on her nerves the way she used to. Things had settled between them after becoming turbulent, following Rose’s absence. Pearl appreciate Amethyst more and she found herself becoming truly impatient and angry with her much less often. Pearl had puzzled over the change, wondering which one of them had softened in the last couple of years. She decided they both had, and they probably owed it to Steven’s compassionate influence.

Amethyst kept grinning and sat herself up to poke Pearl’s cheek. “Ah? Are you gonna smile?” she teased Pearl. Pearl swatted her hand away, or at least made the motion to. Amethyst caught her by the wrist as she raised her hand and gripped it.

“You’re not so perfect, eh?” Amethyst asked, reaching with her free hand to try and rustle up Pearl’s hair. “You’re gonna get messy!”

Pearl squirmed and flailed. “Amethyst!” she cried, unable to sound stern when she was moments from collapsing into laughter. “Oh, stop! Stop it!” She finally broke down into giggles as they wrestled, Amethyst trying to mess up Pearl’s hair and Pearl trying to buck her off. In the struggle, Amethyst had managed to perch herself in Pearl’s lap and she suddenly had Pearl’s other wrist in her grip, pinning both of them against the back of the couch and leering over her.

Pearl wheezed, her cheeks flushed and her hair a mess. She tried her best to scowl at Amethyst. She tried half-heartedly to get out of Amethyst’s grip and she felt the quartz tense and hold her wrists down. 

“Hm, well both of our hands are occupied, now,” Pearl said. “Well done. We’re stalemated.” 

Amethyst didn’t retort and it was only then that Pearl noticed Amethyst was staring at her with a rather intense, serious expression. Her previous mirth had completely vanished. Pearl’s smile started to fade into a more concerned expression. Her eyes locked with Amethyst’s as she gave her a confused, searching look. She felt Amethyst’s weight shift on her hips and Amethyst started to lean in closer. 

Pearl’s puzzlement was quickly replaced with alarm. Amethyst was so close, inches away and Pearl realized, dizzily, that Amethyst was intending to kiss her. No matter how clueless she tended to be over Amethyst’s moods and actions at times, Pearl was certain she couldn’t misinterpret that. Pearl sucked in a sharp breath between them and her previously frozen body finally moved. She pulled herself back, pressing herself into the couch cushion she was trapped against, trying to put some meager space between their lips before they met. Amethyst’s eyes, which had been nearly closed, opened widely. Pearl felt Amethyst’s grip on her wrists loosen. Pearl continued to stare at Amethyst, caught like a deer in headlights.

Amethyst sat back. She looked dumbfounded, like she’d just come out of a trance. The two of them stared at one another. Pearl wearing an expression of shock and confusion, Amethyst looking somewhere between embarrassed and apologetic. At the same time, they both began to speak, but were cut off.

“All clean!” Steven suddenly announced as he emerged from the steamy bathroom, dressed in his pajamas. 

Amethyst sprung back from Pearl and retreated to the other side of the couch. Pearl too sat back, a heavy blush on her face. She hurriedly tried to smooth out her hair as Steven came over. She wasn’t sure what had happened, or what was going to happen, but she was relieved that Steven had come and interrupted it. She rubbed one of her wrists and glanced over at Amethyst. Amethyst looked just as flustered as Pearl felt and she was doing everything in her power to not look at her. 

Steven didn’t immediately notice anything was amiss and he happily bounced onto the couch between the two of them. Pearl decided to embrace the distraction and she leaned in towards him.

“I’m glad you’re so invested in cleanliness, Steven,” she said with a proud smile. There was a tremor in her voice that she hoped Steven wouldn’t notice. “It’s important to keep things neat and tidy. It’s a sign of discipline and responsibility.” 

Steven grinned. “I’m definitely both of those!”

“Hey, are you guys saying I’m not responsible and disciplined?” Amethyst asked from her side of the couch. She was grinning. She looked completely normal.

“Aw, no! You’re not dirty, Amethyst! You’re just messy…” Steven insisted. 

“Hey, I have a system!” Amethyst protested. “It’s organized chaos.”

Pearl was confused until she saw Amethyst wince at her in a moment when Steven was looking away, her large eyes begging her to play along. It wasn’t real, but she sounded so much less frazzled than Pearl was.

Pearl swallowed. “Oh please, Amethyst, nothing about you is organized,” she tried to scoff, after waiting a beat too long. “But you’re right about chaotic.” 

Amethyst stuck her tongue out at Pearl. “You probably think about my messy room all the time and it drives you crazy.” 

“Hm, you assume I spend any time at all worrying about how you choose to live your life,” Pearl retorted, smirking. 

“You do, you’re obsessed with my life,” Amethyst laughed. 

“Hardly!”

Steven looked between them. “Aw, you guys…” he said in an emotional voice. Pearl and Amethyst ceased the banter to look at the boy, quizzically. “You know, you’re both so different than when I first moved in.”

Pearl looked confused. “How do you mean, Steven?” 

“Like, not in a bad way!” Steven assured her. “Just like… it’s not as tense between you two anymore. I’m glad about it. I was so worried you hated each other, for the longest time.” 

Steven’s statement carried much more weight, considering what had happened a few minutes before. Pearl worried her bottom lip between her teeth, feeling herself blush, if it had ever stopped.

“I never hated Pearl,” Amethyst stated, frowning. 

Well that’s an understatement, clearly, Pearl thought to herself.

“I never hated you either, Amethyst…” Pearl murmured, keeping her gaze averted.

Steven roughly hugged both of them, taking Pearl’s attention away from Amethyst, at least for the moment.

“I’m glad!” he exclaimed. “That makes me happy.” 

Pearl and Amethyst grimaced at one another in a look of shared embarrassment. 

“Geez, Steven… if you’re so worried about stuff like that, you shoulda just said something before,” Amethyst said. 

–

As Steven was settling in to sleep, he had an odd request for Pearl. Pearl didn’t usually see him off to bed anymore, but she’d had the urge to make sure he’d put his laundry away correctly. Or at least, that’s what she told herself. She was probably just stalling on actually going into the temple for the night. She tried to be subtle about it at least, since she didn’t want Steven to believe she thought him incapable. She pretended she was inspecting the entire bedroom for something. 

“Ah yes, no… spiders,” Pearl said. “Um.” 

“Tuck me in?” Steven asked from his bed. Pearl blinked at him. 

“…of course, Steven,” she answered after a surprised pause. She went over and tucked the sheets and quilt in around his feet, leaning over his bed somewhat to do so. She sat on the edge of the mattress. “Is that alright?”

Steven nodded, smiling. “Thanks…” 

They’d all been working hard to treat Steven like more of a “grown up” at his own request. So the tucking in had come as a surprise to Pearl. She wasn’t sure what had prompted it. But she tried not to dwell on it too much. 

“Well then, I’ll be in my room if you need me,” Pearl said. She paused, hovering over Steven before she started to get up. To her surprise again, Steven reached for her, putting an arm around her neck and leaning up to kiss her cheek. 

“Night, Pearl. I… I love you…”

Pearl stood back when Steven released her. She put a hand to her mouth, her eyes shining. “Oh… Steven. I love you, too,” she said, a bit choked up. She hadn’t expected the moment to be so tender.

“You’ll always be here… right?” Steven asked. 

“What do you mean? Of course I will. I’m not going anywhere.”

“Okay… good.” Steven seemed satisfied and he closed his eyes. 

“Goodnight,” Pearl said, softly. She walked down the stairs in a daze. The whole moment between her and Steven should’ve been a sweet one, but she couldn’t shake the feeling that something was wrong. When she reached the bottom step, she glanced back up towards his room, wondering if she should’ve asked him about it. She decided against it. They’d all had such a nice day together. She was afraid of spoiling it by reminding them all of the reality of the situation. Something was going to happen. Another conflict between the gems of Earth and Home world, she suspected. And they were vastly outnumbered this time around. 

Pearl wanted to let Steven be a child for a little while longer. 

The gem stood in the dark common area, alone. She put her arms around herself, as if to protect herself against a chill. She felt so unsettled, so confused. Amethyst had gone but Pearl knew she had to talk to her, even if she was dreading it. She couldn’t let the moment between them go without acknowledgement. 

Pearl stepped up to the temple door, to enter her room. She was full of dread once again, but it was a different sort of dread than she’d been feeling before.


	2. Clutter

Pearl knew Amethyst wasn’t fond of having people show up in her room unannounced, but Pearl felt like she’d been left with no other choice. 

She was tense, all the same. Amethyst had that unmistakable streak of quartz aggression, hardly her fault considering that was how she’d been made. Pearl rarely saw it more pronounced than when Amethyst’s “territory” was being intruded upon. Whether that territory was her room or something more private. 

Amethyst was very protective and possessive of things she deemed to be hers. She seemed to have a strong emotional attachment to every piece of junk in her room, even if Pearl doubted she was capable of keeping an inventory of all the things she’d hoarded over the years. 

It had always been a tendency of Amethyst’s to hoard things and Pearl had never really understood the appeal of it. Aside from just being aesthetically displeasing, piles of heavy junk could be hazardous. But Pearl had noticed Amethyst’s need to collect things had become more pronounced after Rose had left them. In a few short years, her collection of what was, to Pearl essentially garbage, had doubled in size. Pearl and Garnet hadn’t yet attempted to reign her in, but Pearl felt like the day was coming. The temple was large, but it wasn’t endless space.

Pearl wandered amid the piles of junk, eyes scanning for any sign of Amethyst. She hadn’t yet called out to her, just wandered. It was very possible that Amethyst already knew she was there. Pearl could imagine herself being watched and she cast a few nervous glances around her, looking for the glint of eyes, the flash of light purple hair disappearing behind a pile that might indicate Amethyst’s presence. But she didn’t see her. 

Pearl tried to think of what she was planning to say to the other gem when they found each other. She felt a bit annoyed, thinking she needed to say anything at all when it had been Amethyst who had tried… whatever she’d tried. Tried to kiss her, Pearl supposed. But to what end, she wasn’t certain. It had been all Amethyst, though. Pearl thought it was Amethyst who should’ve come looking for her, to explain herself. 

Truthfully, Pearl was happy it hadn’t gone worse. She could’ve slapped Amethyst, or shoved her, reacting instinctively. She hadn’t done anything to make it worse than it already was. Pearl didn’t know why she considered that such a plus, though.

Kisses didn’t always mean anything. Pearl knew that. Perhaps the urge had just struck Amethyst out of nowhere. Maybe she’d learned it from the quartzes at the zoo. Who knew what quartzes were like with one another in close quarters? Maybe those touchy-feely gems were more affectionate and it was normal for them.

“Oh, she didn’t learn it from the amethysts at the zoo, that’s stupid,” Pearl spoke out loud to herself. She’d known plenty of defected soldiers during the war and none of them were known for greeting each other with lip kisses. She didn’t think Amethyst had just been joking around, either. Amethyst had kissed her before, albeit never on the lips, and it had always been fast and brief, and always with an air of playfulness to it. Sometimes when Pearl relented to something Amethyst wanted, Amethyst would hug her tightly and kiss her cheek while Pearl pouted. Sometimes, if Amethyst was mocking Pearl, she’d try and kiss her hand like she was royalty. Those sorts of things. Things that didn’t feel serious.

They were kisses that Pearl knew were meant to annoy and fluster her, beyond anything else. Pearl had always reacted to them with annoyance, sometimes with a swat. And Amethyst would dance away from her, laughing while Pearl would glare. Pearl was fairly certain that acting annoyed and swiping at Amethyst after that almost-kiss would’ve hurt Amethyst’s feelings, not made her laugh. It hadn’t been a joke at all. She’d done it with full serious intent. And that posed much more of a problem.

Amethyst hadn’t been acting out of the ordinary, at least not that Pearl had observed. She didn’t seem to have the anxious energy of someone who was working up the nerve to kiss someone. Perhaps it had been spontaneous, just because the opportunity presented itself. Pearl hated to consider that Amethyst had feelings for her. She wished she’d never had to consider that about her teammate.

Privately, Pearl would admit that she had thought about both Amethyst and Garnet in a romantic context. Not in any serious way, but more as a thought that passed through her mind, as a consideration. It was only natural to at least consider them, since they were the only other members of their species on the planet, or had been until Peridot and Lapis came along much later. It would’ve been very convenient to be in a relationship with either of them. Gems weren’t like humans. There was no evolutionary advantage to pairing up. Doing so didn’t assure the continuation of their species. But gems did have a need for companionship, as strong as any human’s need, but perhaps more pure since it wasn’t bogged down by silly reproductive urges.

So Pearl had at least given it some thought, just for the fun of it. Especially after it became clear that Rose and Greg were getting serious.

There was an appeal to Garnet, undeniably. Garnet was strong, powerful and steady. Any gem would be eager to align themselves with Garnet. Pearl turned to her in times of crisis and felt reassured by her presence. Garnet could protect. But Garnet was a fusion of love. Even if Ruby and Sapphire were willing to open their relationship up to another gem, and Pearl doubted they’d ever do that, Pearl felt like she’d always be a tourist or an observer in their relationship, not an active member. They’d already found one another, were devoted to one another and didn’t seem interested in sharing themselves with anyone else in that way. 

That left Amethyst, who lacked any of Garnet’s reassuring presence. She didn’t have that stability and strong leadership that Pearl was naturally drawn to. She didn’t always seem to take things seriously, or conduct herself in the most mature way. But… Pearl would relent, Amethyst wasn’t entirely unappealing. She was cute, she was fun to be around, and Pearl felt like every time she was with Amethyst, she wasn’t thinking about the past, the war, the hardships they’d endured. She didn’t feel quite so burdened when Amethyst was with her, even if they were only bickering. And unlike Garnet, Amethyst was available.

Pearl’s, if she wanted her. 

Pearl felt her cheeks get warm at the thought. She was getting ahead of herself. She hadn’t even talked to Amethyst about how she felt. She had no idea what the depths of her feelings were. There was no way Amethyst was interested in her as more than a crush, if that. Pearl felt confident of that because she felt fairly certain that if Amethyst had felt more… she would’ve noticed. 

Pearl had been in love before. She knew what it looked like and how it felt. And Amethyst had never displayed any of what Pearl considered the unmistakable signs of being in love. She wasn’t jealous or possessive. She wasn’t going out of her way to protect Pearl or sacrifice herself for her. She didn’t get moony-eyed over Pearl. She didn’t follow Pearl around, eager to bask in her presence. She didn’t try to fuse with Pearl even when it wasn’t necessary. She didn’t cling to Pearl at every opportunity.

So Pearl could only conclude that Amethyst didn’t love her. 

Coming to that conclusion made her feel a little better. At least she knew she wasn’t dealing with anything heavy. They could move past this. Pearl was eager to move past it. She’d decided long ago, not to let her emotions and feelings for her teammates compromise their mission. They couldn’t afford to. Pearl had experienced love enough for one lifetime, with Rose. And after Rose had gone, Pearl had decided not to allow herself to feel it again. Her heart belonged to Rose, and no one else. Not ever. She’d never betray her, even in death. That was a vow she’d taken. It kept her mind clear of distractions, kept her focused on missions and their cause. It worked for her. So she knew even if Amethyst had romantic feelings for her, Pearl could never return them.

Pearl hadn’t noticed she’d been pacing rather than advancing through the messy room. She was unaware that Amethyst had been sitting perched atop a lopsided couch at the peak of one of her junk mountains, watching Pearl walk back and forth, occasionally muttering to herself. The purple gem finally decided to get her attention, since it was fairly clear that Pearl had gotten stuck in her own head and would need some help getting out. 

“YO, P!” Amethyst called, causing Pearl to stop abruptly. Pearl’s head snapped right and left before she turned herself and looked up to see Amethyst. “Are ya just gonna walk around and talk to yourself or what?” 

Pearl turned fully, having to crane her neck to look at Amethyst. She put her hands on her hips. “What would you like me to do, Amethyst?” she asked, impatiently. “You ran off before I could talk to you.” 

“I didn’t run off!”

“Why don’t you come down here and we’ll talk like civilized gems?” 

Amethyst considered it. “Nah, I don’t wanna.”

Pearl sighed. “Alright. Then I’m coming up.” 

Amethyst said nothing but watched and didn’t do anything to discourage Pearl from climbing the tower of junk. She waited, ready to offer assistance if it was needed. But Pearl managed it all on her own. Eventually she popped up over the side of the couch and heaved herself up onto the cushion. She slumped against it. “I’ll give you this, it’s pretty tiring to climb up here.”

“Heh… yeah…” Amethyst mumbled. 

Pearl sat up and looked at Amethyst expectantly. “Well?” 

“Well, what?” 

“Are we going to talk about what happened?” Pearl asked. 

Amethyst shrugged, uncomfortably. “I didn’t really want to but… I guess you probably do, so…”

“Were you going to kiss me?”

Amethyst was squirming on the spot. “I… yeah,” she conceded with a wince.

“Why?”

“Why?”

“Yes, why?” Pearl pressed. She didn’t want to lead Amethyst into any answers. She wanted the gem to tell her in her own words.

Amethyst had started tugging and twisting at a lock of her lilac hair, keeping her eyes off Pearl. “I-I dunno… It just seemed like it would be… nice.” 

Pearl started to speak but then Amethyst began to talk rapidly, the words tumbling from her mouth like a floodgate had been opened. “I swear, I wasn’t like, thinking about doing it for a long time or anything! It just came to me right then! I just feels like… we’re all running out of time, you know? I wanna think we’re going to win, and everything’s gonna be okay, but what if it’s not gonna be okay? We always talk about how we’re going to win, like it’s such a sure thing, but there’s only four of us, and Homeworld is so big. And the Diamonds…” 

Pearl understood how Amethyst was feeling, of course. Her anxiety mirrored her own. When she could see that Amethyst was getting worked up, Pearl set a hand gently on her arm.

“I understand,” Pearl said.

“I miss Rose,” Amethyst continued, her voice softer and more hopeless sounding. “I miss you.”

“But I haven’t gone anywhere,” Pearl stated, confused. 

“Yeah you have, you’re a million miles away,” Amethyst replied. “I guess I just wanted to… bring you back.”

“Oh.”

“You can be mad about it, I would be…” Amethyst muttered.

“No, I’m not mad…” Pearl sighed. She was still confused. Amethyst hadn’t really confirmed anything to her. She wasn’t sure what she was talking about. But she wanted to make her feel better, regardless. “I was surprised, but I’m not mad, okay? I promise.” She smiled and scooted closer to Amethyst, paused and evaluated how she seemed to be feeling, then leaned in against her. “I mean, it’s always nice when someone wants to kiss you.” 

“Yeah,” Amethyst agreed. Pearl felt her relax. Pearl put her arm around her, sliding her hand under her hair. Reaching up to gently run her fingers through it. She heard Amethyst utter a soft sigh. Pearl blushed. 

“You’re so dear to me, Amethyst,” she whispered. “I know I don’t tell you that very often…” She paused. “Or ever. But it’s true. Even when we fight. I’m sorry you’ve been feeling like I’m… far away. I’ll try to come back to you more often, okay?” 

She felt Amethyst nod. “Okay…”

“This doesn’t change anything,” Pearl added, her voice soft. “I don’t think of you any differently.”

“Okay…” Amethyst agreed. “Um…” She blushed. “I’m sorry I did that. I dunno what I was thinking.” She chuckled, uneasily. “I hope I didn’t really freak you out. So stupid.”

“Aw, no… it wasn’t,” Pearl insisted. 

They sat together in silence for a long while. There wasn’t any tension between them, though. At least, none that Pearl could feel. She wasn’t sure if Amethyst was feeling tense, but she felt like so close, it wouldn’t go unnoticed. Pearl continued to stroke her fingers through Amethyst’s hair, something Rose used to do with Amethyst that Pearl knew she’d always liked. Rose had always been very good at offering comfort and reassurance. Pearl felt much less capable of it. Any time she attempted it, Pearl always felt like she was trying to mimic an action that came naturally to someone like Rose.

Amethyst just wanted to be comforted. Pearl knew she’d been neglecting her, lately. That would have to change. Rose would’ve wanted her to. And Pearl didn’t want Amethyst to suffer because she was feeling unappreciated or unloved. She was a quartz and she had a heart gem location. She couldn’t help but lead with her emotions, do what felt good in the moment, act on impulse. It was just her way. On the battlefield, her devotion and bond to her fellow quartzes would’ve been an asset. Pearl couldn’t fault Amethyst for seeking out the affection she was made to want.

Pearl heard an odd whistling sound and she turned her head slightly, feeling Amethyst’s weight sag against her side. She realized Amethyst had dozed off and the whistling was her snore.

“Really?” Pearl mouthed. She tried to carefully detach herself from Amethyst, leaning away from her and gently easing her down onto her back on the couch. Amethyst stirred and she rolled onto her side, facing the inside of the couch. Pearl sat back, looking down and considering how best to descend the mountain of junk.

“You leavin’?” Amethyst murmured. She sounded faintly disappointed.

“Yes, but I’ll be in my room if you need me,” Pearl stated. She stared at Amethyst for a long moment. Amethyst stared back. It felt heavy, the way it had felt before, when Amethyst had tried to move in for a kiss. Pearl felt like she needed to do something but nothing to give the purple gem the wrong idea.

“You’ll be alright?” Pearl brushed a few stray locks of hair from Amethyst’s eyes. 

“S-sure,” Amethyst answered, looking a bit dazed. “I’ll be fine.”

Pearl nodded. She gripped the couch and started carefully climbing down. Amethyst sat up on the couch, leaning over to watch her. 

“Bye,” she said, quietly. 

Pearl glanced up at her. “I’ll see you tomorrow?”

Amethyst smiled. “Yeah… and P? Thanks for being… so cool about this. You really didn’t have to be.”

“Well, I am pretty cool,” Pearl answered, giving her hair a toss. 

“Yeah, sometimes. When you’re not being a nerd!”

“Good night, Amethyst.”

–

At around the usual time that Steven would get up in the morning, Pearl emerged from her room to find him standing alone in the common area of the temple, staring through the screen door at something. The rain hadn’t stopped, but it had become less harsh. By first light, the sky had become less dark as the cloud cover thinned. The raindrops fell in more of a drizzle than a downpour. Fog had rolled in. And thankfully, the heat had broken.

“Good morning, Steven!” Pearl greeted. Steven turned and held a finger to his lips. 

“Shh!”

Pearl slowed in her approach. “What’s going on?”

“It’s Garnet and Amethyst…” Steven said, softly. He was clearly worried. Pearl frowned as she came up behind him, standing to look as well. She put her hands on his shoulders. Outside on the beach, Pearl could see Amethyst and Garnet standing and facing one another. Garnet’s arms were crossed and she was standing still with her head bowed. But Amethyst was pacing back and forth, yelling and gesturing with her arms. Pearl couldn’t make out the words, but the tone was clear. She squeezed Steven’s shoulders.

“I think they’re fighting…” Steven whispered. “What should we do?”

Pearl took a moment to think on it. “Let’s leave them to it,” she answered, surprising herself as much as Steven with her decision. Pearl would only involve herself if things got violent, and she doubted it would get that far. If Garnet and Amethyst were having a disagreement, it wasn’t her business. It was certainly an odd occurrence, though. 

Pearl led Steven away from the door and encouraged him to fix himself some breakfast. He poured himself a bowl of cereal, distractedly casting worried glances to the front door. He’d begun to eat it when Garnet stepped in from outside. Amethyst wasn’t with her. Pearl and Steven looked at Garnet, expectantly. Waiting for some kind of explanation. Garnet seemed perfectly content not to give one. 

The fusion looked between Pearl and Steven. Then she headed towards the temple warp pad. Steven reached behind himself to touch her arm. It stopped her.

“Garnet…? Um… is everything okay?” Steven asked. 

Garnet broke into a smile. It was small, but its warmth was genuine. “Don’t fret,” she spoke, placing her hand atop his head. “Amethyst and I just had a disagreement, that’s all. She’ll be back later. She’s just taking a walk to cool down.” 

“That’s a relief…” Pearl chimed in from behind the counter. She glanced towards the front door, wondering if Amethyst needed someone to talk to. Despite the awkwardness from the previous night, Pearl felt like it had all gone much better than expected. Amethyst had been remarkably mature, too. Pearl was still having warm, fond feelings, and she’d still resolved to be there for Amethyst more than she had been in the past. She didn’t want to make empty promises to her.

As if sensing what Pearl wanted to do, Garnet looked over at her. “Give her a little bit of time,” she said, speaking directly to her. Pearl blinked a few times. 

“A-ah, okay?”

Garnet snapped and made a finger gun at Pearl, before she headed onto the warp pad and activated it, vanishing in a beam of light.

–

Mid-morning, Pearl slipped out of the beach house and started off to locate Amethyst and hopefully bring her home. She couldn’t help it, as much as Amethyst probably wanted her space, Pearl couldn’t stand seeing Steven moping around the house, casting wistful glances out the window. He adored Amethyst and probably shared a closer bond with her than any of the other gems.

“I’ll go find her,” Pearl promised him. “Just stay here. Watch your Breakfast Pals.” 

“Breakfast Friends,” Steven corrected her. 

Pearl started with the spot where Garnet and Amethyst had been arguing and she headed off through the fog, away from the temple. She kept close to the shoreline, following it like a pathway. And because the fog was still so thick, Pearl didn’t spot Amethyst until she’d almost tripped over her. Luckily she didn’t.

“Oh! There you are,” Pearl said. Amethyst was sitting on the beach, not doing anything in particular. She gave Pearl a glance, then looked moodily out at the water lapping the shore.

“Yo,” she muttered, flatly.

“Hey…” Pearl took a seat next to her, wincing at the damp, cold sand. “Next time you and Garnet decide to argue, I’d rather you did it out of Steven’s sight and earshot. He’s been worried all morning.”

“Ugh, I didn’t think he’d even be awake,” Amethyst groaned, tilting her head back and looking exasperated.

“Always assume that Steven sees and hears more than he lets on,” Pearl said, simply. “I think we’ve underestimated him long enough.”

“Right…” Amethyst agreed, guiltily.

“I won’t ask what you two were fighting about,” Pearl added. She gave Amethyst an opening to explain herself, but Amethyst didn’t speak. “…I just hope you two can resolve whatever’s going on for Steven’s sake. And for our team. Keep the harmony, as Garnet would say.”

“Yeah…” Amethyst mumbled. She drew her knees up to her chest, hugging her arms around them.

“I’m worried about what it’s doing to Steven,” Pearl continued. “He’s gotten so… I don’t know, exactly. He’s different. Last night he was asking me if I was going to leave him.”

“Yeah well, Steven’s a sensitive kid.”

“Exactly my point. We need to do more, all of us, to make sure he’s safe. To make sure he doesn’t feel hopeless. His powers are tied to his emotional states, after all. We can’t give him any reason to lose confidence. If we’re anxious, Steven’s going to be.”

Amethyst nodded. “Right. Yeah. I know…” 

“So we pretend, if we have to” Pearl insisted. “We march back to that temple,” She turned and thrust a finger at the temple’s shape in the fog. “And we put on our bravest faces, and we pretend that nothing is wrong.”

“Mm.”

“Are you going to come back inside?” Pearl inquired. 

“Eventually.”

“I told Steven I was going to bring you back. Garnet’s not even there, she went off somewhere by the warp pad. Please come in? You’re soaking wet.” Pearl demonstrated this by lifting Amethyst’s wet hair like it was a single mass. Amethyst self-consciously tugged her hair away from Pearl and threw it over one shoulder, twisting it in her hands to ring it out. Water splattered into the sand.

“I didn’t notice.” 

“Come on,” Pearl urged, again. She got to her feet, brushing wet sand off her backside before she held her hand out to Amethyst. Amethyst hesitated, but then took Pearl’s hand and allowed the taller gem to help her up. The two of them wobbled, then straightened. Like before, Pearl and Amethyst remained joined at the hand and neither seemed to mind the contact. They walked back to the beach house together where Steven was eagerly waiting for them. 

“What were you guys fighting about?” Steven asked once Amethyst was seated on the couch. Pearl was sitting behind Amethyst, legs neatly tucked under herself. She was towel-drying her hair.

Amethyst sighed. “I asked Garnet about something and she told me her future vision predicted something that didn’t happen… and I ended up looking really stupid because of it.”

Pearl stopped drying for a second, just letting her hands rest on Amethyst’s head through the damp towel. Was Amethyst talking about her? Had Garnet told her something? Pearl began to dry again, a bit more aggressively than before.

“I guess sometimes her future vision can be wrong,” Steven offered, sympathetically. “What did she say was gonna happen?” 

“It’s okay, it’s- ouch, Pearl! Not so hard!- not a big deal anymore,” Amethyst assured him. “Anyways, we’re fine. I said I was sorry, she said she was sorry. It’s all good, now.”

Steven cast his eyes downwards, his brows knit together. Amethyst exchanged a glance with Pearl over her shoulder. Then she took the towel off her head and crawled closer to Steven. 

“C'mon, it’s not a big deal, dude,” Amethyst said, putting her hand on his knee. “You fight with Connie sometimes, right?” 

“Well, yeah…” 

“So it’s the same thing. Just ‘cause you fight with someone doesn’t mean you don’t love them, right?” 

“Oh yeah… Yeah, that’s right,” Steven agreed, smiling softly. “That’s true.”

Pearl sighed in relief. Her curiosity was piqued, though. Had Garnet really had a future vision about her and Amethyst, that might’ve emboldened the purple gem to make a move? It seemed unusual for Garnet to meddle in such a way. And to be honest, it made Pearl feel a little uncomfortable, too. She knew Amethyst could’ve been referring to something else entirely, but the timing made her skeptical of that.

For the moment, Pearl decided not to ask about it. She’d dealt with enough surprises.


	3. Drowning

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter contains forced fusion stuff happening.

The warp pad in the stillness of the forest suddenly activated after years of disuse. The sudden light and sound sent birds scattering to the skies, cawing angrily. Pearl, Garnet, Amethyst and Steven materialized on the platform, weapons at the ready. But the forest quickly settled back into silence once more. It was almost too silent, without the reassuring sounds of birdsong or even the wind through the trees. 

Uneasy, the group stepped off the platform and onto the forest floor. It was daylight, but the forest canopy was thick and there were plenty of places a corrupted gem could hide in the mottled patches of shadow. 

Wordlessly, Garnet led the way. Her mood was odd as Pearl observed her. Although often stoic, she seemed genuinely troubled by the impending mission and Pearl wasn’t certain why. A corrupted gem wasn’t to be taken lightly of course, but subduing and bubbling their fallen brethren had become such a common mission objective, it was almost mundane. Pearl knew Garnet well, and there was something wrong. But she wasn’t sharing her worries with the rest of them. 

It had been a few days since the incident with herself and Amethyst, as well as the fight Amethyst had gotten into with Garnet. Everything had settled down since then. Everything felt normal. And then all at once that morning, Garnet had announced their mission to find and bubble a corrupt gem she’d had a vision of. The gems assembled quickly, eager for a mission after a seven-day stretch without one.

Pearl hadn’t wanted any of their fighting skills to atrophy. It had only been a week, but a week was enough time for Pearl to linger around the temple, listlessly. She’d been feeling good about the mission, at least until Garnet’s mood had darkened. Garnet’s strange behavior was making all of them a little tense. Few things could rattle Garnet. So whatever it was they were facing, it was enough to get Garnet worried.

As they walked, Steven began to lag behind and he was breathing heavily as though the brisk walking pace was difficult for him. Amethyst slowed down to stay by his side, giving him a worried look. It was unusual for him to become winded from something so minor. “Hey, what’s up?” she asked. “Are you tired?” 

Steven stopped walking when Amethyst did and he put a hand on one of the nearby trees, leaning against it. He took several deep breaths, afraid to tell Amethyst he was feeling light-headed. “I just need a sec…” he croaked. 

Amethyst furrowed her brows as she listened to him wheeze. “Are you having trouble breathing?” 

“A little,” Steven admitted. “I think we must be kind of high up… It’s okay, though! I get used to it after a few minutes and then I’m fine! I mean, there was barely any air on the moon base and I still could breathe there, right?”

Amethyst frowned. She glanced in front of them, but Pearl and Garnet had continued to walk on ahead, neither of them aware of the situation. She turned her attention back to Steven. 

“I just need to get used to it… take bigger breaths, heh…” Steven said.

“I’ll carry you.”

“No, come on! I’m a Crystal Gem!” Steven protested. Amethyst hoisted Steven up onto her back and Steven didn’t give much protest. He did seem embarrassed, though and he hid his face in her hair as she began to walk again. 

“I don’t want you to pass out, dude,” Amethyst said, simply.

“Okay…” Steven sighed. “I’m already getting used to it, though.”

“I’m glad I don’t need to breathe,” Amethyst mumbled, chuckling. 

“Yeah, you’re so lucky,” Steven mumbled, enviously.

Amethyst and Steven brought up the rear and Pearl took the opportunity to fall in next to Garnet’s wide stride. “What is it?” Pearl asked, keeping her voice low. Garnet was moving briskly and Pearl had to walk faster than she was comfortable with in order to keep up. Behind them, Steven and Amethyst had started to dawdle but she didn’t realize the reason for it.

“There’s something off about this corruption…” Garnet muttered. “But I can’t see what it is.” 

“Something off?”

“Yes. We need to be ready for this one…” 

“We’re always ready for everything,” Pearl assured her with an uneasy smile. She set her hand on Garnet’s arm. Ahead of them, the trees suddenly shook and branches snapped all at once as something massive began to lumber into view. Garnet and Pearl took a step back, staring up at the creature before them. A corrupted gem, no doubt, but it was enormous. Pearl was certain it was the biggest she’d ever seen. Several trees around it were dwarfed by its height. It resembled an animal with a jagged mouth, a shaggy mane and several eyes not just on its head, but along its arms and shoulders. Pearl couldn’t begin to fathom which gem it had been pre-corruption. 

“It’s huge,” Pearl gasped, stating the obvious. Her head snapped behind her to check on Steven and Amethyst, but both of them had run to catch up with Garnet and Pearl, and were standing with weapons drawn. 

Steven looked somewhat fearful but Amethyst simply looked determined. “Heh, the bigger they are, the harder they fall. Right, Steven?” 

“R-right!” Steven agreed, his expression changing to mirror Amethyst’s.

“Be careful, gems,” Garnet said, her jaw tight. 

The corrupted gem, despite its size, didn’t appear immediately aggressive. It’s body language seemed to imply it was surprised to find the Crystal Gems there and it took a moment to size them up. But then it let out a strange cry and lunged for them, the ground rumbling under its six enormous legs.

“Scatter!” Garnet barked. The group sprung apart, each of them heading off into a different direction in the forest. The corruption stopped in its tracks, its massive head shaking from side to side as it deliberated who to follow. In the end, it settled on Garnet and took off in the direction she’d headed in, knocking trees out of its path in its rush towards her. 

Pearl raced through the trees, using the trunks as springboards to leap up and circle back. The corruption hadn’t chased her, but its position was clear to her by the noise it was making leveling the forest it was barreling through. Pearl spotted it from the back and from her angle, she was able to locate the creature’s gem. Almost immediately though, she also caught sight of a second gem. And then a third. A fourth, a fifth. Suddenly Pearl realized she was seeing several gems in various places on the creature’s body that she hadn’t noticed before. She hastily counted at least seven.

“It’s a fusion…” Pearl whispered to herself, somewhat surprised by that realization even though in hindsight, it seemed like it was obvious. She hadn’t thought a corrupt gem had the mental capacity to cooperate with another corrupt gem in a fusion, let alone more than two of them. That explained its size and unusual appearance, at least. The creature was moving slowly, unaware of Pearl behind it. She caught sight of Garnet through the space between the corruption’s legs. It seemed focused intently on Garnet and was stalking her like she was prey. Garnet looked fearful, which was unusual for her.

Pearl raised her spear, moving soundlessly towards the fusion. Perhaps she could take out one or two of its gems at the very least. She had a clear shot. Pearl aimed an energy shot and fired, hitting one of the gems directly. It didn’t cause the gem to break free of the fusion although it left its body somewhat singed in the spot she’d hit.

The fusion reared up, crying out in pain. It turned to look at Pearl, snarling. Pearl grit her teeth and raised her spear, again. One of the creature’s arms seemed to lose its form and turned into a long tendril that came rushing towards her. Pearl sprung out of the way, landing in the branches of a nearby tree. Before she had a moment to get her bearings, the creature hurled itself at the tree and sent the trunk splitting. The tree tipped and fell. Pearl landed next to it as it hit the ground. On the other side of the tree, she spotted Steven and Amethyst. 

“Watch out for it!” Garnet cried. “It’s a fusion!” 

“A corrupted fusion?” Amethyst asked. Her voice caused the corruption to turn its attention to her and Steven. Amethyst grabbed Steven under her arm and darted out of the way of one of its tendrils. 

“Do we need to fight fire with fire?” Pearl called to Garnet and Amethyst as they ran from the tendrils. 

“Alexandrite?” Amethyst asked. 

“We have no choice!” Garnet agreed. She was suddenly jerked violently off her feet and suspended upside down in the air as the fusion’s tendril grabbed her around the foot. Pearl and Amethyst stopped running, turning. Amethyst set Steven down. The fusion tossed Garnet up into the air and caught her around her middle, its tendril constricting around her. Garnet grunted and tried to pull free, but she was completely immobilized. 

“Garnet!” Amethyst cried. Without thinking, she charged upwards, landing on the fusion’s multiple tendrils and using them as stairs to reach Garnet. Amethyst extended her whips and wrapped them around the fusion’s limb, trying to force it back and have it let go of Garnet. 

Pearl watched as the fusion’s tendril began to glow with a white light that slowly engulfed its entire body until it became formless, its several gems hovering within it. Garnet’s scream cut through Pearl’s stupor and she realized that it was trying to absorb Garnet into its fusion, as evidenced when Garnet’s body began to glow as well. 

“No! NO!” Garnet cried, fighting against it with all her might. “Stop! I don’t want to! I DON’T WANT IT!” 

“Steven, cover me!” Pearl instructed. She rushed the beast, leaping up and slicing through the tendril with her spear. The force disrupted the fusion process and the glowing ceased. The tendril disappeared and Garnet fell to the ground on her side. Steven, using his shield as cover, hurried over to Garnet’s fallen form. 

“Garnet!” he cried as he skidded to a stop next to her. Garnet was unresponsive. Steven rolled her onto her back and removed her visor. All three of her eyes were closed. Steven shook one of her shoulders with his free hand.

Angrily, the fusion began to slam its tendrils down on Steven’s shield. The force caused him to drop to his knees and he tried to cover himself and protect Garnet. Pearl had landed behind the fusion and Amethyst had dropped off its back and landed next to her, spooked by the fusing process. 

“If that thing touches us, we’re going to be absorbed…” Pearl whispered. “It can tell who the strongest gem is, that’s why it wanted Garnet first.”

“We gotta get Steven and Garnet out of there,” Amethyst muttered. She turned to Pearl, holding out her hand to her. Pearl nodded and took it. Amethyst spun Pearl towards herself and their bodies began to glow as they met. They fused into Opal and without hesitation shot an arrow at the fusion to distract it from Steven and Garnet. 

The fusion turned to Opal, its eyes wild. It began to move towards her, taking an interest in her as she’d hoped would happen. Steven withdrew his shield so he could link his arms under Garnet’s and drag her to cover. “Please wake up, Garnet!” he pleaded as he dragged her into the brush. Once they were sufficiently hidden, Steven knelt down next to her and tried again to revive her. He was shaking, tears springing into his eyes. “Garnet, come on! Come on!”

Garnet groaned faintly and Steven exhaled in relief. As Garnet began to sit herself up, hand to her head, Steven wrapped his arms around her and hugged her tightly. “Y-you’re okay! Are you okay??” He moved back from her to check her over, fearfully. “Did you get corrupted?” 

Garnet was still dazed but she checked herself over as well. She still seemed to be herself. Corruption seemed to be fairly fast acting. “I’m alright…” 

“Did you know it was a fusion?” Steven asked. 

“I had a hunch…” Garnet admitted. Her attention turned to the commotion happening outside of their hiding place.

Steven got up to check, running to the edge of their cover to peek through the tightly spaced trees. As he did, Opal raced by him, with the fusion in hot pursuit of her. “It’s Opal!” Steven exclaimed, excitedly. “She’s leading the fusion away. We’re safe.”

Garnet got to her feet slowly, but her legs wobbled and threatened to give way. Steven, seeing this, headed back to her side and positioned himself under her arm to help support her. It was a bit awkward, considering their height difference. “Garnet, you’re hurt… just take it easy.” 

Garnet didn’t correct Steven. She wasn’t physically injured but incredibly shaken, almost in shock. When the corruption had tried to force her into the fusion, her mind had gone white with panic. She could only think of how terrified she’d been. She’d felt the corruption’s form trying to enter her. If it had been only a few moments longer, Garnet was certain she wouldn’t have been able to hold onto herself and the fusion would’ve taken her. She’d come incredibly close to becoming a part of that monster. Her future vision gave her a brief glimpse of the scenario and she couldn’t shake the thoughts from her mind. She began to tremble, hating that she was coming undone in front of Steven. 

“G-Garnet!” Steven cried in surprise. He felt Garnet sag against him and she reached to cover her face with one hand as she tried desperately and angrily to hold back tears. She couldn’t do this, not here. Her teammates needed her. She couldn’t let Steven see her like this. 

“I-I’ll be alright…” Garnet said, unconvincingly. The corruption hadn’t gotten her, but she could still feel the imprint of it in her mind. It had been too close, much too close. She’d felt the creature’s rage and panic. For the briefest of moments, she’d felt what it was like to be corrupted. It had felt like her mind was beginning to fray. She began to understand why the corruptions tended to display such blind aggression.

“Opal’s got this, we’ll be okay,” Steven assured her, unaware of the depth of Garnet’s trauma. Garnet could only grip his arm to try and find some grounding in him. She nodded, numbly. 

Meanwhile, Opal hadn’t managed to do much damage to the fusion, but she’d successfully led it away from Steven and Garnet. She hoped Garnet was alright, but she knew she couldn’t dwell on the uncertainty right then. Stopping the corruption was her only objective. The corruption certainly overpowered her as a fusion, but it was acting completely on instinct. She was confident she could beat it if she used her head.

She continued to run. She was small enough to slip between the trees, slowing the corruption’s pursuit of her. Putting some distance between them, Opal tried to think of a plan. If she could lose it, she could buy some time. But that ran the risk of the corruption turning back to try and find Steven and Garnet. She couldn’t allow it. 

As the corruption’s lumbering footsteps got fainter, Opal slowed her pace, glancing over her shoulder. Distracted, she didn’t realize she’d broken into a clearing in the trees and she very nearly plunged off a steep drop of a cliff. With a cry of surprise, the fusion flailed her four arms. Unable to stop herself in time, she instead reached and gripped a nearby dead tree trunk and swung her body around it so she was facing away from the cliff edge. Several stones were disrupted from her brief struggle and they went tumbling over the edge of the cliff.

Opal instinctively brought herself in against the tree trunk, all four arms and two legs wrapped around it as she clung. She could feel the rough, try bark pressing into her cheek. Opal’s eyes were squeezed shut as she breathed heavily for a few moments, trying to calm herself. A fall from that a cliff would be painful but unless she landed gems-first on a hard surface, it was unlikely to crack or shatter her. With that in mind, Opal loosened her grip around the tree trunk and she opened her eyes.

Warily, she shifted to the edge to peer down. The cliff was a sheer drop, hundreds of feet down. Much further down than she’d realized. Below were treetops so far away, they looked small and misty. Opal carefully pushed another stone over the edge with her foot and watched it fall, soundlessly. She never heard it land.

The trees snapped behind her and Opal turned, face to face with the corruption. She was stunned by how quickly it had caught up to her. It began to approach her slowly. Opal clung to the tree trunk again. The wind was picking up and her long ponytail whipped behind her. Opal knew she could drive the fusion off the cliff where the impact of the fall would hopefully poof its body. 

Opal narrowed her eyes and she beckoned for the fusion to come to her. 

“Come on… you want to absorb me, right?” she asked. “Come get me.” 

The fusion took another heavy step out on the cliff. Opal felt the ground under them start to sag and she realized the ledge wasn’t going to hold the weight of the fusion. The ground began to tilt as it started breaking from the cliff side. Opal held her ground.

“Come on…” Opal urged again, under her breath. The fusion clearly wanted to get her, but it was cautious when it felt the ground bend under it. Opal kept one arm around the tree trunk and leaned out, holding her other arms out in an open challenge.

The fusion growled. Then it lunged for her in a sudden burst of speed. Opal swung herself around the tree trunk and the fusion stopped itself just before it tumbled over the edge. It made a whine of surprise. Opal swung back around and kicked the fusion square in the back with as much force as she could muster. It howled, its voice sounding disturbingly like several voices screaming together. Then the ground under them began to really give way. The fusion tried to scramble back up to safety but instead it began to fall. It grabbed for Opal, one of its massive limbs blindly clawing out towards her. It managed to hit Opal in the forehead and the surprising force of the impact momentarily stunned her. Opal felt herself falling along with it and she withdrew a whip from Amethyst’s gem, wrapping it around another tree further from the ledge. She gripped the handle as she went into a free fall. But then her body snapped still and she dangled in the air over the cliff.

Opal held the handle of the whip with two hands, trying to get her feet into the cliff side and walk herself back up. She glanced down to see if the corrupt fusion had fallen. Instead, she was stunned to see that it had dug its claws into the cliff and was clinging on. It wasn’t far from where she was hanging but luckily she wasn’t within swiping distance of it. Even if she had been, the fusion was more concerned with keeping itself from falling than it was with attacking her. Grunting, Opal tried again to pull herself up. But she was struggling to do it. Her body felt heavy and weak.

Opal’s feet slid uselessly along the cliff, trying to find something to grip onto. More rocks were knocked loose and went tumbling down. Some of them hit the corrupt fusion below her and the impact caused its grip to loosen on the cliff wall. It howled again, mournfully. Opal watched it with wide eyes. The fusion met her gaze, but she couldn’t tell if there was any intelligence or sentience in it anymore. Then it let go of the cliff itself, which caused Opal to gasp.

The corruption fell fast, its body hitting the cliff side several times on the way down. Eventually Opal lost sight of it as the trees and mist below swallowed it up. The wind howled. But there was no sound of impact.

Opal felt strange. She should’ve been able to hoist herself up with ease but instead she was hanging in midair, unable to bring herself up and back over the edge. She reached out with one arm and gasped when she saw her own arm glitch before her eyes. The shock of seeing it caused the whip in Opal’s hand to vanish suddenly. Opal felt herself drop and she fell. But shortly after, she felt her body hit a small outcropping. She nearly tumbled over the edge of that but she managed to stop herself and she got to her feet, shakily, bracing herself against the wall of the cliff.

Opal hesitated before she dared to look up. She’d fallen a good distance. The top of the cliff stretched up above her, seeming an impossible height from her. Opal raised one hand, fearing what she was going to discover as she gingerly touched Pearl’s gem. There was a deep crack running through it. The fusion had struck her much harder than she’d realized.

“I’m cracked,” Opal whispered, her voice not her own but instead Pearl and Amethyst’s speaking together. She felt her consciousness beginning to split as a conflict rose up between Pearl and Amethyst. Her body began to glow as it seemed she was going to unfuse.

Pearl was in a panic realizing she’d been cracked. She’d convinced herself that her gem was moments from splitting in two, and the slightest force would trigger it. With a surge of power, she felt herself hold Amethyst into the fusion even as she felt her trying to get away. Opal’s form stopped glowing, but her body warped a few times in the struggle between the two gems. 

“Let me go!” Amethyst’s fearful voice cried out from her mouth. Opal grunted and staggered forward before she pressed her back again against the wall. She felt unwell, dizzy. One of her arms extended and then went dead, hanging loosely from her side like a noodle. One of her good arms reached up and she fisted her hair in her fingers, her ponytail coming undone. She began to tug at her hair in a frenzy, her eyes widening. 

Still, Pearl clung to Amethyst in desperation. She wasn’t thinking clearly and barely aware of the distress she was causing the other gem. Opal forcefully hit her shoulder into the wall and then slid down to sit with her knees up, holding her head in her hands and tears began to stream down her face.

“Opal!” Steven’s voice called from above. 

Opal raised her head. From far away, she could see Steven looking over the edge of the cliff. “Don’t move, I’m coming to help you!”

Opal could only stare. Pearl had strong-armed Amethyst into submission, but even with nearly full control of Opal, Pearl wasn’t thinking clearly. With her gem so damaged, she’d regressed into an almost feral state. She barely recognized who Steven was. 

At the top of the cliff, Garnet was holding onto a rope and lowering Steven over the edge. “Be careful, Steven!” she warned over the wind. “She’s not in her right mind!”

Steven descended slowly with his arms out towards Opal. “Here I am! Don’t be scared!” he said to her. Opal bared her teeth as Steven hovered in front of her, his body turning slowly back and forth on the rope. 

“GET AWAY!” Opal shrieked. She swiped at Steven, blindly. Garnet managed to yank him out of the way enough to avoid the most of it, although Opal’s nails had grazed Steven across the cheek, leaving a small but stinging cut. 

Steven swung back and forth and he tried to steady himself. The wind was picking up again, making him rock even more violently. He gripped the rope above him.

“Opal…” he tried again, speaking softer. “It’s me, it’s Steven…” 

Opal stared at him but her wild expression had faded as she realized she’d hurt Steven. Apologetic, she reached out to touch her fingers to his cheek. “S-Steven I’m… I’m so sorry…”

“It’s okay…” Steven assured her, smiling. “You’re cracked, Opal. Can you let me heal you?”

Opal hesitated, and then nodded. She reached out and gripped Steven, pulling him up and towards her forehead. She closed her eyes. Steven leaned in, pressing his lips against her gem. 

–

“It’s not that bad, Pearl…” Steven muttered. He was sitting on the couch, facing her. Pearl was applying a cotton swab to Steven’s cut. 

“Even so…” Pearl answered. She looked at Steven with a pleading expression. Steven backed off right away. She was trying to make amends and he decided not to deny her that. 

“Okay…” Steven sighed and then smiled softly at her. “You take such good care of us all.” 

Pearl weakly returned the smile. Once she’d cleaned the wound, she gently put a bandaid over Steven’s cheek. She put her hand on his head, paused, and then leaned forward so that their foreheads were touching. She closed her eyes. Steven put his arms around her. 

“You didn’t mean it, Pearl. It’s okay, I promise…”

Pearl put her hand over her mouth. She nodded. 

The mission had been an unmitigated disaster, and everyone knew it. Once Opal had the strength to scale the cliff side, she’d unfused in a hurry. The walk back to the warp pad had been completely silent. No one brought up the fact that they hadn’t bubbled the corrupt fusion, or hopefully its components. It was gone. To be dealt with another day. 

Garnet and Amethyst had gone to their rooms without a word. Pearl had wanted nothing more than to go and hide out, herself. She felt humiliated over how everything had gone down. But she didn’t want to leave Steven alone after such a terrible mission. She wanted to make sure he was alright.

Steven appreciated the company, too. Garnet, Amethyst and Pearl had all sustained some trauma, and he was worried about all of them.The last thing he wanted was for Pearl to leave as well. What he really wanted was for all of them to sit down together and talk things out, but he knew that wasn’t the gems’ style. At least, not so soon after the mission. They all needed a cooling down period.

He was going to suggest they played Lonely Blade together, but he thought better of it. Nothing with combat was probably best. “Did you want to hang out? We could um… watch a movie?” Steven suggested. “You pick.”

“Alright…” Pearl agreed, feebly. She wasn’t really interested in any movie from Steven’s collection, but she was grateful for the distraction.

Steven made popcorn while Pearl sat on his bedroom floor and tried to pick out a movie. She kept casting distracted glances at the temple door, hoping that Garnet or Amethyst would emerge. But neither of them did. Pearl was worried about Garnet, of course, but her focus was primarily on Amethyst. She’d hurt her, violated her, and Pearl couldn’t begin to figure out how she could make it better. Words of apology just seemed hollow and pointless. Pearl’s own strength had surprised and frightened her. She hated to think that she had it in her to force Amethyst to stay fused with her. Even if she was panicked. She’d never expected herself to react that way. Years of training, years of struggling to overcome her Homeworld programming, and this was what it all amounted to. Panicking blindly in a crisis.

Pearl was seated on Steven’s bed when he came to join her, bowl of popcorn in his hands. Pearl was staring off at nothing and she didn’t react when Steven sat next to her. He waited a moment before speaking. 

“Um… did you pick out a movie?” he asked. 

“O-oh…” Pearl looked at him, embarrassed. “Yes, um… This one.” She held it up and Steven looked at the cover. 

“A documentary about… volcanoes?”

“Is that no good?” Pearl inquired, worriedly. 

“No, it’s fine! It’s great!” Steven answered, quickly. “I can’t wait! Volcanoes are cool!” He got off the bed and put the movie in before returning to the bed. The documentary began and Steven started munching on the popcorn. To be polite, he offered some to Pearl but she predictably refused. 

As they watched, Steven asked, “Pearl, can you go into a volcano and not die?”

“Ah, no. Only Garnet can do that…” Pearl answered. “My gem isn’t quite so resilient.” She paused, then self consciously put a hand to her forehead, touching the smooth surface of her gem. 

Steven frowned. “It’ll be okay, Pearl,” he tried to reassure her. “Garnet and Amethyst just… they probably just want to be alone right now. But they’ll come around.” 

Pearl nodded. “How was Garnet…? I know what I did to Amethyst, but I didn’t ask Garnet how she was.” 

Steven looked troubled as he remembered. “She was… off. She was crying a bit. Shaking. At first I thought maybe the corrupt gem had hurt her, but…” 

Pearl clicked her tongue. Fusion was of course a touchy subject for Garnet. But being forcefully absorbed by a fusion must’ve been a very upsetting for her, as it would’ve been for any of them. To Garnet, fusion was something done for love and trust. Any perversion of what fusion meant to her disturbed her. She could only imagine. “She’s shaken up…” Pearl murmured. “Understandable, I suppose.”

“What about Amethyst?” Steven asked. Pearl stiffened. “What happened to her?”

“When we were Opal, she tried to unfuse with me and I… I didn’t let her…” Pearl answered. 

“Like Lapis and Jasper?”

“Yes…” Pearl winced at the comparison but decided it was justified. “At least Lapis had a reason for it, misguided as it probably was… but I was just in a blind panic and all I could do was hold her to me. I don’t know why I reacted that way…” Pearl shook her head. “It’s never happened before.”

“You were drowning.”

“Sorry?”

“Uh…” Steven struggled to explain it. “Like when someone is drowning, if someone else jumps in to save them, the drowning person sometimes will panic and grab onto them and drag them under without meaning to. It’s just survival instinct, I guess. Gems have that, right? Survival instincts?”

“Of course…” Pearl said, thoughtfully. “I suppose that’s the best way to describe what I was feeling, if I was feeling at all. I was panicking and I was dragging Amethyst down with me.” 

“And I’m sure she’ll get that!” Steven added, a bit more cheerfully. “You didn’t do it on purpose, right? And I healed you, so it all worked out!” 

“I hope she feels the same way you do,” Pearl sighed. They turned their attention back to the movie, although Pearl’s head wasn’t in it. She kept thinking about what had happened and she couldn’t focus on much else.

After Steven went to bed, Pearl remained up in the living room. She didn’t want to risk missing Garnet or Amethyst when they came out. She sat on the couch in the dark, eyes on the temple door, just waiting. 

–  
It took a lot of convincing before Steven finally agreed to keep his appointment with Connie and Greg. Pearl was insistent he go. She knew he needed human time with his family and friends and she didn’t want him to spend the day dwelling on what had happened on the mission. Even so, Steven lingered at the front door. 

“I’ll be fine, Steven,” Pearl insisted for at least the third time that morning. 

“But if Amethyst and Garnet are still hiding out… you’ll be all alone,” Steven said, sadly.

“Which doesn’t bother me in the slightest,” Pearl dismissed him. “Please go. It would make me happy if you got to have a fun day with Connie and Greg.”

Steven nodded. “Okay… um… I don’t know when I’ll be home. I’ll leave my phone. If anything comes up, if you need me… just call Connie or my dad, okay? I’ll be with them, so…” He hurried back to the couch and pushed his cell phone into Pearl’s hands. Pearl took it only so he wouldn’t worry. 

Once he’d left, she set the cell phone down on the living room table. Pearl was feeling lethargic. Being Opal, putting so much energy into staying fused, had taken a lot out of her. She was still feeling the effects. She wasn’t one for napping, but she figured she’d spend at least part of the day resting up. With that in mind, Pearl rose from the couch and went to pick out a book from the shelf. 

Pearl decided on one that looked vaguely tolerable, although she never had high hopes for human literature. On the walk back to the couch, she studied the front and back cover. It seemed a little mature for Steven’s tastes. It appeared to be a true story about hikers stranded on a mountain after an avalanche and their thrilling account of survival. Pearl felt herself smile. It must’ve been something Connie had brought, considering her penchant for survival stories.

Pearl sat back on the couch, skimming over the summary on the back cover. Not that impressive to her, but then again, she didn’t need to eat or sleep and she was impervious to all but the most extreme temperatures. Pearl glanced back at the temple door. Then she opened the book and started reading, with a heavy sigh. 

–

Amethyst did eventually come out of her room first, although it was to emotionally eat rather than any desire to see the others. She stopped abruptly when she spotted Pearl on the couch. She considered heading back into her room, but that would only tip Pearl off to the fact that she was upset. Pearl had heard her come in and she looked up before she stood almost with violent swiftness, throwing the book down on the couch. 

“A-Amethyst!” Pearl exclaimed. She hesitated, then hurried to her side as Amethyst took a few steps into the kitchen. “You- I’m… H-how are you?” Pearl put her hands on Amethyst’s arm, then withdrew them. She hovered nervously around her as Amethyst went to open the fridge. Amethyst was faintly scowling and she looked fatigued.

“I’m fine,” Amethyst answered in a clipped voice. “Just tired.”

Amethyst took a jar out of the fridge, unscrewed the lid, and took a sniff of whatever was inside before she apparently deemed it fit for her consumption. Pearl didn’t know what the contents were, which told her it was probably already long past its expiry date. She winced as Amethyst shut the fridge and walked off, heading back towards the temple door. 

“Please, wait…” Pearl called to her. Amethyst stopped but didn’t turn around. “Can’t we just… talk about what happened?” 

Amethyst turned to look over her shoulder at Pearl, warily. “Uh, okay?” 

Pearl went to sit on the couch again and she patted the spot next to her, hopefully. Amethyst hesitated, then went to sit next to her. She set the jar on the table next to Steven’s phone before she looked at Pearl, impatiently.

“Amethyst…” Pearl began, averting her eyes from her. “I can’t tell you how sorry I am for what happened. I wasn’t… in full control of myself. But that hardly matters. I hurt you, and I feel terrible for it. I… I want you to know that what happened in no way reflects how I… would typically act in a crisis.”

“I know.”

“O-oh.” Pearl blinked. She paused. “W-well in any case! I am sorry, Amethyst. Truly.”

Amethyst nodded. “Okay. I get it. You didn’t mean it, it’s fine.”

Pearl allowed herself a cautious smile. “Yes, that’s right. I’m so glad you understand… I was so worried about you.”

Amethyst smiled a little, herself. It was really more of a grimace, but Pearl accepted it all the same. With that, she threw herself at Amethyst, hugging her tightly. “Everything’s really okay, then?” Pearl confirmed. 

Amethyst sighed and she awkwardly pat Pearl’s back. “Yeah, P. It’s fine, I said. I mean, it was really…” she trailed off and Pearl let her go, looking at her quizzically. Amethyst seemed to think better of finishing her initial thought. “It was fine, I know you didn’t do it on purpose. You were just freaking out.” 

“But you were in your room…” Pearl said. 

“Heh, yeah. I was sleeping,” Amethyst admitted. “I was tired. I’m still kinda tired, so… can I go?” 

“O-oh. Ah, yes. That’s all I wanted to say, I just wanted to check in on you…” 

“Cool. Thanks.” Amethyst picked up her jar and left, returning to her room. Pearl watched her go. Had that gone well or poorly? Pearl couldn’t tell. She decided not to push Amethyst and leave her be. She did understand, right? Pearl knew she’d never intentionally hurt any of her teammates and surely Amethyst also knew that. 

Pearl dejectedly picked up her book and opened it, again. She found herself continuously re-reading the same few lines, unable to absorb anything. Amethyst was allowed to be upset, even if she’d accepted Pearl’s apology. It was an upsetting experience. Pearl was upset by it, too. Upset by her own behavior. But she tried to remember what Steven had said. She was drowning. Of course in that situation, anyone would panic and act unpredictable, right? 

The temple door opened again and Pearl’s eyes darted up from the meaningless words of the book. Without thinking, she blurted out, “Amethyst?” only to be met with Garnet standing there.

“Oh, Garnet!” Pearl exclaimed. She got up again from the couch. “I haven’t seen… are you alright? Steven told me about… what happened.” 

She approached Garnet with caution. Amethyst, even at her worst, didn’t intimidate Pearl the way Garnet did. They were close friends and veterans of the same war, but Pearl was always acutely aware of the power imbalance between the two of them. Not that Pearl ever thought Garnet would do anything to hurt her, but the thought of Garnet being disappointed or annoyed with her was always a lingering fear. 

“Garnet…?” Pearl asked, coming up to stand near her.

Garnet looked uncomfortable, even embarrassed. “It wasn’t my proudest moment…” she admitted. 

“It sounds like it was very scary, though,” Pearl sympathized.

Garnet nodded, slowly. “It’s alright, now, though. I’m fine.” 

“Alright…”

Pearl followed Garnet to the couch. The fusion took a seat on the cushion, wearily. She phased off her visor so she could look Pearl in the eye. Pearl took a seat on the edge of the cushion, next to her. “Is there anything I can do?” Pearl inquired. Her worry was clear. 

“No, nothing…” Garnet mumbled. “I really am fine, now… I’m… dealing with it.”

Garnet was already talked out over the whole situation. Ruby and Sapphire had gone back and forth over it a dozen times. There was nothing more to say, and she didn’t feel much up to reliving the traumatic memory once again, just for Pearl’s benefit. She knew that Pearl knew what had happened. She didn’t need to know how it felt.

“Garnet, I realize maybe this isn’t the best time but…” Pearl began after a bit of a silence between them. She glanced up at Garnet again. Then she quickly looked away, shaking her head. “Ah, no. Never mind.”

“You want to ask me about Amethyst,” Garnet stated. 

“Did she… when the two of you were fighting… was it about me?” Pearl asked in a small voice. “Because she made it sound like you’d… seen something. Or… predicted something… about the two of us…?”

Garnet gave her a sidelong glance. She leaned forward, clasping her fingers together and resting her chin on them. She closed her three eyes for a moment, before opening two and leaving the top one shut. “I don’t use my future vision to meddle like that, Pearl.”

“I know, but… Amethyst made it seem like you encouraged her because-”

“I did, but as any friend would. Not because I saw anything. She didn’t mention it was you, but I assumed it was…” 

Pearl deflated. “Is it serious…? Her feelings?”

“You should be asking her, not me.”

“But she wouldn’t tell me! Please… Did I give her the wrong idea? Send mixed signals? I always thought the two of us were just teammates, nothing more. Garnet, if you’re seeing… if you’ve seen us in the future… together… you have to let me know.” 

Garnet sighed. “The future isn’t a straight line, Pearl.”

“I know, but-”

“I’ve seen hundreds of different scenarios. Different outcomes. I can’t tell you exactly where you’ll end up. Even if I was certain, it’s not my place to influence your choices.” 

“Have you seen… even one?” Pearl pleaded. “Even one thread, on one line, on one branch, somewhere… where we end up together?”

Garnet gave Pearl a hard look and Pearl was worried Garnet was going to shut her down. But Garnet seemed so weary, too tired to fight her on it. “Yes…” she finally admitted. 

“Okay…” Pearl breathed. Somehow, she hadn’t expected Garnet to tell her. Maybe it was so far off, so unlikely that it barely mattered. But that it existed as a possibility at all was more than Pearl had been prepared to know. “I don’t even know the extent of Amethyst’s feelings… not really,” Pearl mumbled. 

“The feelings you should be asking about are your own,” Garnet replied. 

Pearl pulled back, blushing. Her first response was to deny any feelings at all for Amethyst. But she knew it would’ve been a lie. Of course she felt things for Amethyst. How could she not have? After all they’d been through together. It wasn’t that she didn’t, it was more that she didn’t allow herself to examine them fully. She didn’t let herself think about how deep they might run, if they were indeed feelings of a romantic nature or something more platonic. A part of her didn’t want to go any further than that. The mission, their vows, Rose, the Earth… There wasn’t time for distractions, romantic entanglements and drama between them. And yet, even if Pearl tried to avoid it, it was still happening. Her attempts to distance herself from distractions hadn’t worked at all. 

Pearl wasn’t certain, though. She knew she couldn’t tell Amethyst anything until she was.


	4. Home

Amethyst was swaying lazily back and forth in her hammock. One arm hung out over the side. One leg was bent up, the other out straight. She had her eyes closed, but she was frowning to herself. She wanted to sleep, but she couldn’t seem to. She liked sleeping because she didn’t usually dream about anything. So it was kind of like not existing for a few hours. She didn’t feel much like existing right then and there. 

It had been a few days since their last mission and Amethyst only emerged from her room sporadically to raid the fridge and bring food back to her room to eat. When she did, she stubbornly refused to meet Steven’s worried gaze. Garnet and Pearl couldn’t crack her, not with all the worried expressions, probing questions and criticisms in the world. But Steven just had to look at her once, and she would cave. Vidalia, during one of their recent visits, had called it “motherly instinct”, which Amethyst had laughed at. 

“My youngest, he knows he’s got his dad wrapped around his finger sometimes,” Vidalia giggled between sips of tea. “The little stinker. Kids know they’re cute, and they can get away with murder!” 

“You got that right,” Amethyst chuckled. She took her teabag out of the cup and ate it. 

“Hard to believe Steven’s already fourteen,” Vidalia added, wistfully. “Ah, times flies.” 

“Ugh, tell me about it…” Amethyst groaned. “Um… what’s going on with the family?”

Vidalia shrugged. “Oh you know, same old, same old. Sour Cream’s starting to look at colleges, maybe. I hope if he does, he’ll at least go somewhere in Delmarva.”

“Geez, he was a baby like two years ago!” Amethyst exclaimed. She grinned. “And you were twenty. Dang, what happened? You used to be so firm!”

Vidalia grinned as well and she elbowed Amethyst in the side. “Oh? At least I was ever firm!” she teased. 

“Hey, I’m all muscle!” Amethyst protested, feigning hurt. 

“Hm, you try squeezing out a couple of kids and let me know how your body looks after that.”

“Psh, I wouldn’t even know how. Anyways, it’s not like my body really changes, like ever.” 

“You’re lucky,” Vidalia said. 

“No I’m not! You’re the lucky one! If you want to get bigger or smaller, you totally can! You can even get taller if you want to!”

“It’s overrated,” Vidalia answered, snorting. “My twenty year old self totally would’ve wanted to be made of solid light. That’s such a lot of pressure off. I used to be so insecure when I was in my 20’s.” 

“Why? You were so hot!”

“Oh, stooop!” Vidalia giggled. 

“Yeah. What happened?” Amethyst asked. Vidalia scowled and drew her fist back. 

“Oy!”

“Kidding, kidding!” Amethyst cried, holding her hands up in surrender. They were both grinning and on the verge of cracking up. “You’re body’s still banging, girl! Let me know if Yellowtail ain’t enough for you.”

“Oh, we’re doing just fine in that department, don’t you worry about that,” Vidalia said with a wink. “What about you, though?” 

“Err, no, I haven’t been bedding Yellowtail, V.”

“No, dummy! I meant like, are you seeing anyone or…?” 

“Pffst, no. I’m a Crystal Gem, I’m… a lone wolf… solitary…” Amethyst tried her best to look dramatic and tortured. She closed her eyes and clenched her hand into a fist. “An island.” 

“Well, it’s definitely slim pickings around here,” Vidalia admitted. “And I guess like any human you got into a relationship with, you’d have to watch die. Kind of a bummer.” 

“Ya think? Plus like, humans… er no offense, V. But like, they’re so… they’ve got this really clear line of stuff they want to do. ‘Let’s date. Let’s get married. Let’s have kids. Let’s retire and move down South. Let’s buy a family plot.’ And gems don’t do stuff like that! We just like, save the world.” 

“What about a gem, though?” Vidalia asked.

“Even slimmer pickings!” Amethyst stated. She took a sip of her tea.

“Pearl?” Vidalia suggested. She was promptly doused with a spray of tea when Amethyst did a spit take at her. 

“Wh-why did you say Pearl??” Amethyst gasped. She put her tea down.

Vidalia crossed her arms over her chest, giving Amethyst a flat look. 

“What?” Amethyst demanded.

Vidalia raised an eyebrow. 

“What?” Amethyst asked, her voice coming out like a whine. She hid her face against one of the throw pillows on the couch. 

“What was it, now? Sixteen years ago?” Vidalia asked. Amethyst muffled a groan into the pillow. “Yeah, I remember. One very drunken night in Ocean Town…”

“I thought you forgot about that… Sixteen years is a long time!” Amethyst protested.

“Not to a gem!”

“Okay, fine… maybe…” Amethyst scowled and put the pillow down on her lap. “Maybe I do still kinda, sort of… love her completely and obsessively- gah! What’s wrong with me??” 

“Have you ever told her that?” 

Amethyst shook her head. “Well, not seriously, anyways… I don’t think I could.” 

“Why not?”

“Pearl doesn’t feel that way about me. Or anyone. Anyone who’s still alive, anyways,” Amethyst mumbled. “And she’s like… really smart except about that so I could like, I dunno… I could do practically anything and she wouldn’t catch on that I…” Amethyst blushed. “…she’s dense about that stuff.” 

Vidalia smirked. “All the more reason to be direct with her.”

“She doesn’t feel that way, V,” Amethyst insisted, pouting. “I know what she’s like when she’s in love. I’ve seen how she acts. She doesn’t act like that with me. If she did, it would be like impossible for her to hide it. Sometimes I think she… feels the opposite, if anything. Hates me.”

“I know that’s not true,” Vidalia said. “And the opposite of love isn’t hate, it’s indifference. Hatred still has passion!” She gave Amethyst a thump on the back. “Well, enough of that. I had to make you uncomfortable for a few minutes, just for old time’s sake.” 

“Aheh heh heh…” 

Amethyst hadn’t exactly confessed to Pearl about anything, but she’d definitely gotten the other gem suspicious. And then the incident with Opal… 

Amethyst opened her eyes and scowled in frustration. She just couldn’t stop thinking about things that kept her awake. She knew she wasn’t going to fall asleep. With a heavy sigh, Amethyst got out of the hammock with some effort and dropped to her feet on the ground. She wandered down to one of the pools of water and she knelt down, sticking her face in it. It was ice cold, but it helped give her a bit of mental clarity, or at least as much as she was ever capable of.

Amethyst sat back, head dripping wet, and she gave herself a shake to dry off.

She didn’t really blame Pearl for it and to be honest, she hadn’t really fought her that hard. She’d felt Pearl’s panic and fear. And that was Pearl, clinging to someone else when she was terrified. It didn’t surprise Amethyst that she’d reacted that way. Even so, it made things doubly awkward between them. Amethyst hated that Pearl had suddenly gotten touchy-feely again out of the blue. It was the worst time for her to do that. Amethyst liked it too much. Maybe Pearl was doing it out of guilt.

Pearl had assured her that things wouldn’t change, but things had totally changed. They’d gotten more unbearable. They’d had a moment in the temple that night. And then again on the beach that morning. But then things had gone quiet for a while. And then the mission. And Amethyst wasn’t sure where it left them, once the smoke had cleared. 

The only reason Amethyst had done what she did, was because Garnet had hinted that none of them had a lot of time left. She’d let it slip, when the two of them were paired off for a mission to recover a gem artifact. 

“It’s so weird, like… Steven just going to space all the time, now! Isn’t that bad for him? Heh.” Amethyst watched as Garnet, with very little effort, shoved a large rock aside to reveal the opening of a cave. Stalactites hung from the curved ceiling, and they subtly glowed various colors, casting moving shapes on the walls. Garnet stepped inside and Amethyst trailed behind her. She gawked at the colors. 

“I bet Home world is pretty mad,” Amethyst added, grinning. “You think?” 

Garnet walked in silence. 

“Garnet? G?” Amethyst asked. She grinned and rushed forward, jabbing Garnet in the middle of her back. 

“Agh!” Garnet cried, in surprise. Amethyst hopped down next to her. Garnet put her hands on her hips, smiling. “I didn’t see that coming.” 

“I’m unpredictable!” Amethyst said, proudly. “You think it’s okay, though? I mean… Home world… and all that…” 

Garnet was quiet. She’d stopped walking, lowering her head and crossing her arms over her chest. Amethyst stepped in front of her. 

“I’ve never been there, I don’t know what it’s all about… just what you guys’ve told me…” Amethyst said. 

“Home world will likely retaliate at some point, once they realize Steven has returned to earth,” Garnet admitted, her voice firm. 

“And?”

“We protect the earth, like we always do,” Garnet answered, simply.

“Is there gonna be like… another war?” Amethyst asked, worriedly. 

“No.” Garnet paused. “Possibly… it’s always possible.”

“How possible?” Amethyst pressed.

“I can’t answer that.”

“You can’t or you won’t?”

“The future changes all the time. I can’t predict anything with 100% accuracy, Amethyst. I’ve already seen us die hundreds of times, only for us to end up on another path. Seeing the end doesn’t affect me anymore. They’re only possibilities…”

Amethyst frowned. 

“Come on, we need to keep moving,” Garnet instructed. They began to walk again. 

“So you have seen something…?” Amethyst asked. 

“Yes… but it does us no good to worry about it.”

“How can you be so calm? Ugh, I’d be such a wreck all the time if I kept seeing visions of our death.”

“It does us no good,” Garnet repeated. “All we can do is try to live, knowing each day could be our last…” 

Amethyst stopped walking, abruptly. “Really?” 

“That’s always good advice to follow,” Garnet stated, giving her a glance over her shoulder. 

Amethyst let that thought marinate for a few moments before she hurried to catch up to Garnet again. At the back of the cave, they finally saw the artifact they were looking for. It sat on a very obvious pedestal, gleaming with a light of it’s own. It was hovering a few inches above the flat stone surface and to Amethyst, it resembled a simple white box, although its sides kept shifting and rotating, like it was containing something alive. She looked to Garnet. 

“Uhh… what’s this called, again?” 

“It’s the Chest of the Souls,” Garnet answered. “It looks like it’s never been used. We must be careful about extract- Amethyst!” The purple gem had rushed past her and she stepped up to the pedestal, picking the box up. It began to shine with a bright light, casting several beams out in all directions. Garnet shielded her eyes. The energy in the room was enough to feel like a strong wind. Amethyst turned her face from the box, squinting. She could feel it heating up in her hands. But just before it seemed like something was going to happen, it ceased glowing, and the heat slowly faded away.

Amethyst looked back at the box and she nearly dropped it in her surprise. It had transformed in her hands. It had become an ornate chest, adorned with small purple gems. The outside was wrapped in what resembled her whips. It had her exact color scheme. Amethyst became even more curious and she tried to open it, only for Garnet to grab her hand. 

“Don’t.”

“What happened??” Amethyst asked. She handed the chest to Garnet who bubbled it and sent it to the temple. “What was that??”

“You activated it,” Garnet sighed. “We didn’t have a use for it, though… so I suppose it’s alright. But.” She summoned one of her gauntlets on one hand so she could punch the top of Amethyst’s head. “Don’t touch any artifacts unless I tell you it’s okay.” 

“I’m sorry!” Amethyst cried. She winced and rubbed her head. “But why… the box changed. It sort of looked like me, don’t you think??”

“The box makes a replica of your essence,” Garnet explained. “Back during the war, it was our… misguided attempt to try and reverse shattering.”

“You mean like… there’s another Amethyst in there?” Amethyst asked, worriedly. 

“Not quite. It’s your experiences, your thoughts, feelings, memories, from your creation up until the exact moment you touched it. Like a backup of your data… whatever essence you have inside you. The thought was that if we could repair a shattered gem or find an empty shell, we could… restore a gem’s essence to them.” 

They’d begun to walk back the way they came. “No way!” Amethyst exclaimed. 

“Yes… after the war ended, Rose tried to use it to help heal corrupted gems. She thought that restoring the essence to a corrupted gem would heal the corruption. In a way, repairing their mind, making them remember themselves… But… it wasn’t meant to be.”

“What happened?” Amethyst asked, her eyes wide. 

“Rose attempted it, once. It made the corruption confused and aggressive… Drove them mad. The corrupted gem began hurting itself in a frenzy. We had no choice but to poof its body. It hadn’t done anything except give the corruption a moment where it became aware of the monster it had become. We decided it was mental torture to inflict such an experience on the gem and we destroyed all the Chest of Souls we’d created. All but one.”

“Wow…” Amethyst whispered, softly. “That’s… pretty messed up.” 

“Yes. We’d tried to heal the corrupt gems in so many ways. Rose was… inconsolable over what had happened to our friends. For years, we attempted to reverse it, but we were no match for whatever it was the Diamonds did. But we understand now that… the corrupt gems forgetting who they were… is the closest thing to merciful that the Diamonds had ever been. It’s better… that a gem forgets who she used to be… After a trauma like that.”

“Heh… I guess so…” Amethyst said, feeling awkward and uncomfortable with the heavy conversation. It was always a little jarring to get new information about Garnet and Pearl from before she was around. It challenged how she saw them. When she was new, Garnet and Pearl seemed to high above her, mysterious and cool and full of wisdom. But the more she learned, the more she uncovered… Garnet and Pearl weren’t so above her and much of what they’d done during the war and afterwards were decisions she herself would’ve made in the same situation.

Garnet glanced at Amethyst. “I’ve said too much…” 

“Nah, it’s fine…” Amethyst reassured her. “I just dunno what to say when I hear stuff like that… besides 'that sucks’, you know?” 

“That’s about all you can say,” Garnet answered, her voice tinged with grief. 

“Even if they never get better… they were prepared to die for the earth, right?” Amethyst asked. “They knew what they were getting into. So do I, by the way. If you see us dying sometime soon, I’m fine with that. I mean… okay, I’m not fine with you guys dying. But I’d totally take a bullet for any one of you. If it meant you were safe. You know?”

Garnet smiled. “I think we all would… for each other.” They exited the cave, stepping back into the sunlight. They walked together, headed for the nearest warp pad. 

“Amethyst,” Garnet spoke. Amethyst glanced up at her. “It’s always a possibility. That we may not make it to Steven’s next birthday.” 

Amethyst frowned. “I know…” 

“You should consider that… if you’re keeping your feelings from anyone.” Garnet kept walking but Amethyst stopped, blinking in surprise. After a moment, she hurried along beside Garnet again. 

“Wait, what?”

Amethyst had taken it to mean that Garnet had seen something between her and Pearl. Of course she hadn’t directly said so, but that’s what Amethyst had believed. She had been truthful with Pearl, though. She hadn’t planned to kiss her, not like that at least. Or almost-kiss her, as she kept reminding herself. It had just felt right, in that moment. She’d misread the situation. Or maybe she hadn’t, and she just wanted to believe that Pearl would… 

“I need to get out of here…” Amethyst muttered. She had no idea what time of day it was, since the inside of the temple didn’t show the changing of days. Because of that, she stepped into the beach house carefully, in case it was night and Steven was asleep. But it was late afternoon, if the sun and the shadows across the floor were anything to go by. The house was quiet and still. No one was around.

Amethyst took a few steps inside, looking around. Usually there was someone. Had the others gone out and not told her? For a second she was angry about it. But she cooled down when she remembered how she’d been acting. Avoiding everyone, staying shut up in her room. She’d been sending very clear “Don’t bother me” vibes all week.

All at once, Amethyst felt lonely. She really hadn’t had much interaction with anyone at all and even though she’d avoided the others on purpose, she wished someone had come to pull her out of her funk. 

Amethyst stepped out of the house and onto the porch, where Pearl was sitting at the table. Amethyst paused in the doorway, holding the door open. Pearl looked up at her and Amethyst looked back at her, almost fearfully. Pearl held the gaze for a lingering moment. But then she looked away from Amethyst. She was sitting with her knees pulled up to her chest, effectively perched on the chair. She had a large sketchbook and she was drawing something in it. 

Amethyst was a bit taken aback by Pearl’s cold response to her. She hadn’t even said hi. But Amethyst again reminded herself that Pearl had tried to talk to her numerous times, and each time she’d been rebuffed. Amethyst figured she deserved the cold shoulder, now. All things considered. It was her turn to make an effort. 

“Hey, P…” Amethyst greeted, walking over to the table. She pulled out a chair and looked at Pearl, expectantly. Pearl was still looking down at pad of paper, sketching furiously.

“Hello.”

“Uhh… mind if I sit here?”

Pearl glanced up for a moment before she looked back down. “Go ahead.”

Amethyst winced and she sat down in the chair. “Nice day out, huh?” 

“Sure.”

Amethyst frowned. She leaned in towards Pearl, doing her best pout. “Aw c'mon, Pearl…”

Pearl scowled down at the paper. 

“I just needed some time to myself, you know? I mean… but it’s okay, now! It wasn’t your fault, it’s fine. I wasn’t mad at you or anything. I was just kinda… I needed time, that’s all.” Amethyst smiled, hopefully. “Are you mad at me, now?” 

Pearl finally set down the pad of paper with abrupt harshness. She glared at Amethyst. “You had us worried sick, Amethyst,” she said, sternly. “You didn’t come out for days.”

“Ah… uh… I know, I’m… sorry,” Amethyst mumbled. 

“We all decided it was better to leave you alone, rather than force you out. And I know Steven and Garnet blamed me for it, which is fine. But do you have any idea how that felt? What happened was scary for me, too. But I’m not allowed to disappear for days on end, Amethyst. I don’t get that luxury. I hope you know that. We cover for you so much…” Pearl took a breath and then went back to her drawing. 

“Okay, I deserved that,” Amethyst said. “I’m sorry, P. I’ll tell Steven and Garnet that it wasn’t about you at all, okay?”

“Fine.”

Amethyst waited for some kind of forgiveness but it didn’t come. Pearl was still fuming. She looked cute when she was mad, even if she was really mad. Amethyst had to keep herself from smiling at it. That wouldn’t make Pearl forgive her faster. Instead, Amethyst tried to butter her up by leaning against her and putting her chin on her shoulder. “Peeearl…”

Pearl grumbled. 

“Whatcha drawing?” Amethyst asked, leaning over her to try and look. Pearl was sketching out a landscape of the view from their porch. “It’s really good.” 

“It’s alright,” Pearl mumbled. 

“You’re so talented and pretty and smart,” Amethyst stated, leaning heavily on her. “You’re so good at everything.”

“I’m still mad at you,” Pearl said, flatly.

“Buuuut?” Amethyst asked.

Pearl pursed her lips together. 

“Peaaarw?” Amethyst whimpered, getting more and more pathetic with each passing moment. “I’m sowwy.”

“Okay, stop!” Pearl cried, putting her hand over Amethyst’s face and trying to hold in her laughter. “You’re the worst. The WORST!” 

“Haha!” Amethyst sat back, grinning. 

“So manipulative.” 

“Steven taught me!” 

“Steven is much cuter than you,” Pearl said. “I just couldn’t stand to watch you embarrass yourself any longer.” 

“Aw, thanks P. I knew you cared!” 

With a sigh, Pearl flipped to a new page in the sketch book. “Why don’t you let me draw you? If you’re capable of sitting still for that long, that is.”

“Sure!” Amethyst agreed. “Uh…” She sat a bit straighter in the chair, unsure of what pose to do. “How do you want me?” 

“Just like that is fine, just natural,” Pearl answered, waving it off. She glanced at Amethyst, then shook her head in disapproval. “Ah, wait…” She got up from the chair, setting her sketchbook down on the table. “Here…” 

Amethyst stiffened when Pearl got in close. Pearl moved a bit of her hair down over one shoulder and tried to push back the bangs that usually obscured one of Amethyst’s eyes. She was leaning in so close. Amethyst could feel herself blushing as Pearl “fixed” her to be sketched. 

Pearl finally looked Amethyst in the eye. “Hm… Are you enjoying this?” she asked. 

Amethyst almost tipped out of the chair. “What??” 

“You’re blushing.”

Amethyst glanced down. “I can’t help it.” 

“I know, it’s okay…” Pearl smiled. “Sorry for teasing you. You look really sweet.” Pearl went back to her chair and picked up her sketchbook once more.

“You’re killing me, Pearl,” Amethyst muttered.

Pearl smiled to herself but didn’t answer. She began to sketch, mostly focusing on the paper but occasionally glancing up at Amethyst. Amethyst sat still for her. Oddly enough, she was fairly used to posing for artwork by that point, although she never quite understood why anyone would want to draw or paint her.

“Can I ask you something?”

“Sure…” Amethyst mumbled, trying to talk without moving too much. 

“Are you in love with me?” 

“Ookay, you can’t ask me something.” 

“Come on, Amethyst,” Pearl urged. She frowned. “Listen, I… I’ve never thought of you that way.” 

“I know,” Amethyst answered. “You don’t have to tell me that.” It also sort of hurt to hear, not that Amethyst mentioned that part to Pearl. Then she added, “We don’t have to talk about it…”

“I think we should, though” Pearl insisted. “We have a problem, we need to address it.”

Amethyst scoffed. “We don’t have a problem! It’s just my problem. You don’t have to do anything about it.”

“But I do…” Pearl pressed. “I did something to… encourage this.”

“What? No you didn’t. It’s fine, seriously.”

“I don’t want our team dynamic to be compromised by… feelings.”

“Has it ever?” Amethyst asked. “You never even knew about it.”

“I suppose that’s true…” Pearl admitted, tapping her pencil on the sketchbook. “Even so… I hope I’ve never made it worse or… led you on or anything like that.”

“You haven’t. It’s all just me.” Amethyst said it so sadly and Pearl wasn’t sure what to do. She hated that she was making Amethyst unhappy by not returning her feelings. She kept going back to what Garnet had said. That somewhere, in some timeline, they’d gotten together. Did that mean they were compatible together? Pearl had never thought so. She only needed to look as far as Opal to be reminded of that. Even when they were focused on fusing, they’d never stayed together longer than a few hours at a time. 

Pearl wasn’t sure if Amethyst would ever want to form Opal with her again, though. She wouldn’t blame her for that. Despite Amethyst keeping away from her for a few days, Pearl thought she’d otherwise been remarkably dignified in how she was dealing with it. If the roles had been reversed, Pearl was sure she would’ve fought with Amethyst over it.

Pearl went back to sketching, deciding to throw her mental energy into the task at hand rather than worry any longer about things like Opal and relationships. She hadn’t gotten far, so she was eager to actually attempt to draw her. Amethyst remained still and quiet as she did. Her blush had faded. She began to relax, although she tried not to actually slouch in the chair and have Pearl scold her. 

"Just let me know if you need a break,” Pearl reminded her. 

“Mm.”

Pearl sketched slowly, taking her time. She’d never really looked at Amethyst closely, at least not the way she was currently doing. Amethyst really was pretty, even if she’d deny it. Pretty in an Amethyst way, maybe not a fully conventional way. Pearl was designed to be visually appealing, to please the eyes of other gems. Quartz soldiers weren’t made with such considerations, and so they had a tendency to look a bit more wild, more rough-and-tumble. But Pearl didn’t think it was unattractive by any means. 

Pearl pursed her lips as she drew. She squinted at the paper. Amethyst was… satisfying to draw. She had a nice round shape. Her likeliness flowed easily out of Pearl’s pencil with long, curved strokes. She glanced up again, then back down, erasing her nose and trying again. She had a cute, kind of upturned nose. And her eyes were bigger. Pearl erased her eyes and tried again. Yes, better. Big, wide eyes. They were so dark, they were nearly black. But they were actually a deep shade of blue. An impossible color for any human and unusual for a gem. The color of the night sky, maybe.

“You make funny faces when you’re drawing,” Amethyst said from her chair. 

“Hush.”

Pearl darkened some of the lines around Amethyst’s body. She wasn’t incredibly curvy, but certainly more so than she herself was. Most Amethysts had narrow waists and wide hips. Since Amethyst was shorter, it was less pronounced. She had short legs, but they were shapely. Pearl drew them carefully, trying to get them just right. 

After a while, Amethyst began to fidget a little, and it was breaking Pearl’s concentration. She’d done enough. She’d never quite capture the real Amethyst, anyways. The drawing on paper was fine, but it was missing something that Pearl couldn’t convey. Something about Amethyst. Her light, her essence. Without it, the gem in her sketchbook was just a shadow of the real Amethyst.

“Alright,” Pearl said, setting the sketchpad down again. The sun had begun to drop lower in the sky.

“Whew… posing is hard!” Amethyst declared as she went slack in the chair. “Can I see it?”

“Sure…” Pearl handed the sketchbook to Amethyst and Amethyst studied the drawing. Pearl averted her eyes, feeling embarrassed. “It’s um… not very good.”

Amethyst looked at it a moment longer before she glanced at Pearl. “Can I have it?” 

“Sure, if you want…” Pearl said, blushing.

“Thanks!” Amethyst flipped through the other pages of the sketchbook, curiously. Pearl got an anxious expression on her face and she worriedly hovered behind Amethyst as she looked through her other drawings. “Man, you’ve got a lot of pictures of birds… Oh, this one’s kinda cool. It’s like um, draping fabric?” 

“I… yes…” Pearl confirmed, still blushing. “I don’t usually let anyone look at my sketches. But you’re allowed to.” 

“Hm, not one naked picture in here, though,” Amethyst said, feigning disappointment. 

“Amethyst!” Pearl squawked. 

“I’ll do the next one that way, if you want. As long as I can do something funny, too. Like naked, riding a rocking horse or something. Holding sparklers!” 

Pearl didn’t even know what to do with the image that popped into her head following that statement. “We’ll see,” she mumbled, although she had no intention of actually drawing that.  
—

With Steven spending the night with Greg and Garnet absent, presumably on her own solo mission, Pearl and Amethyst had free run of the beach house. Once the sun had begun to set, they went inside so Amethyst could find something to eat. Pearl took a seat at the kitchen island and she rested her elbows on the counter. She clasped her fingers together and rested her chin on top of them.

“What do you want to do, now?” Pearl inquired. 

Amethyst turned from the fridge. “You mean you still wanna hang out?” 

“Sure?” 

“Did you miss me that much?” 

Pearl looked serious. “I did.” 

“Oh…” 

“I don’t know why you always act like I hate you,” Pearl added. “I don’t.” 

“Yeah… I dunno…” Amethyst mumbled. “I know you don’t.” 

The warp pad near the temple entrance suddenly activated, startling them both. Garnet appeared and she hurried towards them. “Amethyst! Pearl!” she cried. “We have to get out of here, right now!”

Pearl and Amethyst were confused, but they could sense the urgency in Garnet’s voice. The three of them left the beach house and hurried down the porch steps. “What’s going on?” Pearl asked, worriedly. 

“Oh no…” Garnet whispered, looking to the sky above them. Amethyst and Pearl both looked up as well. Against the twilight sky was an unmistakable Home world aircraft, although in the fading daylight, it had a shadowy appearance. And it was coming down fast.

“They’re here for Steven!” Garnet explained hastily as the ship sailed over their heads, disappearing behind the cliff and stirring up a rough wind. 

“He’s with Greg!” Amethyst cried. 

“Come on, then!” Garnet ordered. The three gems ran along the beach in the direction of the car wash, where Greg’s van was always parked. As the ship got closer to the ground, the ground began to rumble from the energy. By the time Pearl, Garnet and Amethyst reached the van, Steven and Greg were already standing outside. Pearl rushed to Steven first, hugging her arms protectively around him. The Home world ship had disappeared into the forest to touch down. 

“That ship is huge!” Greg exclaimed.

“Are those gems from Home world?” Steven asked, worriedly. “Are they here for me?” 

“We won’t let them get you, Steven,” Pearl assured him. She kept her arms around him. 

“What’s the plan, here?” Amethyst asked. 

“Attack first, questions later,” Garnet answered, through grit teeth. “Alexandrite.” She looked between Pearl and Amethyst. “Can you do it?” 

Pearl looked to Amethyst, questioning her silently. Amethyst nodded without hesitation. “Yeah, let’s do it,” she agreed. 

“Hang back here, Steven,” Garnet instructed. Steven started to protest right away.

“But, what if you need me?” he asked. 

“These gems aren’t here to fight, they’re here to retrieve. If they see you, they’ll take you and that will be the end,” Garnet answered. “Stay here.” 

Steven frowned but he nodded. “Okay,” he said, softly. “Be careful, PLEASE!” 

“Don’t worry!” Amethyst assured him. “We’ve got this!” 

After a brief fusion dance, Amethyst, Pearl and Garnet fused into Alexandrite. She stepped over Greg and Steven and ran towards the forest to face the intruding gems. Steven remained back with Greg. But he had a bad feeling that something was going to go wrong.


	5. Taken

Despite her size, Alexandrite was relatively silent as she moved carefully through the trees. The darkness and the foliage provided a bit of cover, and allowed her to get closer to the enemy than she might’ve otherwise been capable of. Before long, she came across the Homeworld ship in the forest.

The ship had touched down, flattening several trees in the process. Two gems were standing amongst the trees. They were new to the Crystal Gems; a pair of identical banded black and white agates. They lacked any diamond uniform that might indicate who had sent them. Instead, they were dressed in identical full body suits, half black and half white right down the middle. Both of them had straight black hair cropped short and were wearing white masks, through which only their pale, unsettling eyes could be seen through the deep-set holes. On both of their masks was their gem, a glittering black teardrop-shaped gem, with white bands running horizontally across. They had them on opposite cheeks, like they were one another’s mirror image. They resembled a pair of twisted harlequins.

They whispered between each other, an exchange Alexandrite couldn’t make out. It didn’t matter, though. She wasn’t terribly interested in listening to the Agates. Any Homeworld gem coming to earth was bad news for the Crystal Gems and the planet. And Alexandrite was through with waiting and observing. They’d made the mistake of being too lenient with other intruder gems. She waited until the pair had turned their backs on her hiding spot, then she rose from the trees, silently, producing Opal’s bow and arrow and quietly taking aim.

The Agate closer to Alexandrite happened to turn and she cried out in alarm at the sight of her. Alexandrite fired, and the arrow turned into many, raining down a barrage of smaller arrows. The first Agate dodged them and she ran to her companion’s side, grabbing her by the hand and leading her behind the ship to take cover. Growling in frustration, Alexandrite stepped out to fully reveal herself.  
“You don’t want to test me,” Alexandrite warned. “I’ll ask you once, and only once. Get back in your ship and leave this planet. You won’t find what you’re looking for, here.”

There was a burst of light from behind the ship and a large, black hand reached over the side of it, gripping it for leverage as the Agates rose up, now a fusion that nearly rivaled Alexandrite in size. Alexandrite stood her ground as the fusion stood to her full height.  
The agate fusion tilted her head. “Rose Quartz,” she hissed. “Where is she?”

“There’s no Rose Quartz here,” Alexandrite growled. “Get out of here, right now.”

“It’s not you we’re here for…” the Agate answered. “But we don’t mind getting you out of the way, first.” The Agate held out her two black arms, which shapeshifted into two long blades. Then she took a step and lunged at Alexandrite with weapons up.

–

Steven paced anxiously by the van while he waited for Alexandrite to return to them. Greg, although entirely out of his element, tried to be reassuring to his son. 

“It’s gonna be okay, Steven,” he said, giving the boy a nervous smile. “Alexandrite’s got this, no problem.” 

“What if she doesn’t, dad?” Steven asked, worriedly. He fisted his hands in his hair. “Ugh… I should be helping to fight my own battles, now. I could help them…”

“They want you to stay here,” Greg answered. “And probably for good reason.” 

“Because I’d get in the way?” Steven asked, sadly. 

“Because they want to keep you safe!”

Steven wasn’t satisfied by that and he resumed his agitated pacing. He could hear the commotion in the trees, although he couldn’t see the fight taking place. “What if there’s like ten gems in that ship??” he asked. He took a few steps towards the trees and Greg hurried up to him, gripping his arm to stop him. 

“C'mon, Steven…” Greg urged. He knew he couldn’t keep Steven from doing what he wanted, but he was determined to at least attempt to parent him. “Let’s just go back to the beach house and we’ll wait for them there, okay?”

Steven turned, his expression aggressive, initially. But at the sight of Greg’s rather obvious worry, his expression softened. “Dad… I wanna make sure they’re okay… what if they’re not okay?”

Greg looked conflicted. “We really should listen to what they say…” 

“But I’m a gem, too!” Steven insisted. “Can we… at least get in closer? We won’t let them see us… I just want to make sure they’re okay…” 

Greg sighed, wearily. “Okay…” he agreed with a feeble smile. 

The two of them headed into the forest. Alexandrite’s location was easy enough to find, with all the commotion the fight was making. Before long, Steven and Greg were able to see the fight happening in the dark. The two of them took cover behind a rock. 

“Yeesh, that other gem is something else…” Greg muttered, uncomfortably.

Despite being a larger fusion, Alexandrite was nearly overwhelmed by the agate’s speed and aggression. Alexandrite could do little more than brace herself when the fusion came at her, knocking into her at full speed and slashing the air in front of her face. Alexandrite planted her feet on the ground but she could feel herself being pushed back across the dirt. She managed to shove the Agate fusion back and off of her. Wasting no time, Alexandrite hit her with a barrage of arrows. The Agate slashed at them with lightning-fast movements, using her blades to break them apart. Taking the moment of distraction, Alexandrite charged again, forming Sugalite’s flail and swinging it at Agate. 

Agate managed to come to her senses just in time and she dodged the weapon before it made contact. Instead, it smashed a tree into splinters. Agate sprung to her feet on the other side of what was quickly being leveled into a clearing. 

“Leave!” Alexandrite said again. 

“Not without the gem we came for!” Agate answered. She rushed Alexandrite again and Alexandrite tried to block her. Agate was fast and violent. As the two brawled, the Agate fusion began to get the upper hand. Alexandrite was flung into a cluster of trees and before she could get herself up, the Agate fusion was on top of her. She drove one of her blades into Alexandrite’s belly so that it went entirely through her and out the other side. 

“Alexandrite!” Steven cried. He ran in from where he’d been watching and hiding. He had his shield at the ready, apparently intending to take the Agate fusion on, single-handedly. From behind the rock, Greg tried to grab him and pull him back, but he failed.

“Steven, wait!” Greg cried.

“Stay there, dad!” Steven ordered. He ran towards Agate, intending to at least distract her from Alexandrite. “HEY! Are you looking for me??” he called up to her. The Agate fusion turned from Alexandrite and peered down at Steven. Steven pulled up his shirt to reveal his gem to her. “If you’re looking for me, I’m right here! Come and get me! Leave Alexandrite alone!”

Alexandrite had only a moment to focus on Steven rushing in before she unfused in a puff of smoke, leaving behind only her three exhausted components. The Agate fusion had turned her attention completely to Steven and she unfused as well. One of the Agates approached Steven slowly, brandishing what appeared to be a gem destabilizer.

“Rose Quartz,” the Agate said, her voice muffled from under her mask. “We were told you’d look… different than how you’re remembered.”

Steven took a step back from the approaching Agate, his eyes hard. 

Amethyst was the first one to come to after they’d unfused. She raised her head from the ground, seeing the Agate was approaching Steven with the weapon. She got to her feet with some effort, her body aching and protesting the movement. “Steven!” she called to him. “Get… get out of here!”

Steven’s attention turned to Amethyst, briefly, before he looked back at the Agate again. The other Agate was focusing her attention on Amethyst. When Amethyst got up and tried to run to Steven, she was at the ready, heading towards her to cut her off. 

“Don’t interfere!” she hissed. 

Amethyst narrowly missed one of her shapeshifted blades. It got stuck in the ground and the Agate tried to wretch it free. Amethyst wrapped her whips around the Agate that was advancing on Steven, momentarily binding her and pulling her back. Steven hurried out of the way and ran behind Amethyst. 

“What are you doing here?” Amethyst asked him.

“I… I wanted to help!” Steven answered. 

The Agate managed to free herself and she turned and swung for Amethyst, although Steven managed to take the blow of her blades with his shield. From the left, Garnet’s rocket gauntlets hit the Agate and knocked her down. Pearl was fighting with the second one, using her spear to block the Agate’s blades. 

“Steven, you need to get out of here NOW!” Garnet said to him. “It’s not safe for you!”

The Agate who had been blasted away by Garnet’s gauntlets pulled herself free of a tree trunk she’d gotten stuck in. She produced her gem destabilizer once again and she ran blindly towards Steven with it. Steven began to turn around. Garnet tried to stop her. “That’s not a destabilizer!” she exclaimed, panic rising in her voice.

Reacting without thinking, Amethyst pushed Steven out of the way of the weapon and took the blow instead. It hit her directly in her gem. Amethyst’s body jolted, like she’d been electrocuted. Her eyes went dead. And then she fell and her body poofed up in smoke. Steven fumbled to catch her gem but the Agate was faster, grabbing onto it first. Pearl and Garnet ran towards her but stopped in their tracks when the second Agate had joined her twin, holding one of her blades up to the gem’s surface.

“We must retreat,” the first Agate said to the second one. 

“Take the gem,” the second one answered. 

“Oh no you don’t!” Pearl cried, coming at them with her spear. The Agate slashed at Pearl, bringing her to her knees and causing her to drop the spear. Steven rushed to her side. Garnet meanwhile charged to attack again but was similarly taken down. Using their blades to defend themselves, the agate twins returned to their ship with Amethyst’s gem in their possession. The hatch closed and the ship began to take off, stirring up a strong wind on the ground. 

Pearl got to her feet, staring up. She aimed several energy blasts at the ship but it had no effect. Steven tried to float up to the ship to stop it. But all at once it had taken flight, vanishing suddenly into the night sky and disappearing in the blink of an eye. Steven drifted down to his feet. Garnet and Pearl stood on the ground, looking dumbfounded. 

Everything was silent once more. 

–

Greg and Steven returned to the beach house with Pearl and Garnet and they sat together on the couch while Pearl paced in agitation and Garnet stood in the kitchen, leaning against the counter. 

“They must’ve been sent by at least one of the Diamonds, right??” Pearl was asking no one in particular. “I’ve never seen Agates like those before…” 

Steven leaned in against Greg and his father put an arm around him to try and offer some comfort. “It’s gonna be okay, Steven,” he tried to reassure the boy. “We’re gonna figure this all out.” 

“This is my fault… If I hadn’t tried to help, she wouldn’t have gotten poofed…” Steven whispered, trying to hold back tears. 

“You did what any one of us would’ve done, Steven,” Garnet answered. 

“Where would they take her?” Pearl asked Garnet. “Have you ever seen gems like those before?”

“My best guess is that they’re working for both Blue and Yellow Diamond…” Garnet replied. She frowned. “Aside from that, I’m not sure…” 

“Garnet, before you said what she had wasn’t a destabilizer,” Steven recalled. “What was it?” 

“I don’t know…” Garnet admitted. “I just know it was something different…”

“So we know… virtually nothing,” Pearl said, frustrated. “Even if we could get into the air, would we know where they’ve taken her? Would they…” She turned to Garnet with wide eyes. “…shatter?” 

Steven clung to Greg. “Th-they wouldn’t shatter her, would they??” 

“Garnet, where are they taking her?” Pearl asked. “What are they going to do?”

“Is she still alive??” Steven asked. 

Garnet looked away from Steven and said nothing.

“Garnet?” Steven asked again, trying to steady his trembling voice. “You can tell me…”

Garnet curled her hands into fists and held them tightly by her sides to keep them from trembling.

“S-Steven, maybe…” Pearl started to interject, weakly. 

“No! Stop it!” Steven yelled. “Don’t… don’t cover it up, okay? I’m not a little kid, I’m a Crystal Gem! Did Amethyst die because of me, Garnet? Did she?” 

“I can’t…” Garnet took her visor off but covered her eyes with her hand. “I-I don’t…”

“I get it…” Steven answered, his voice calm. He stared down at the floor, his body feeling cold. Everything felt unreal to him. He felt so calm, so together. Was that how he was supposed to feel? He barely registered Pearl trying to hug him, but then he pushed against her with more force than he meant to, shoving past her as she stumbled back. “No!”

He turned to Garnet again, anger surging up in him. “Garnet, TELL me!”

“Steven, stop it!” Greg cried, getting to his feet from the couch. 

Steven whirled around to face Greg, his eyes blazing with a strange intensity. He didn’t look like himself at all. No one approached him. Steven’s eyes darted wildly between the three others in the room, waiting for someone to say something. To confirm his fears. But Garnet couldn’t do it. She wasn’t able to tell Steven Amethyst was dead. She’d begun to weep, quietly. The only indication was the trembling of her shoulders and the tears running down her cheeks. 

Steven stared at the floor and he grit his teeth as tears began to form in his eyes. Everything felt wrong to him. Everything felt so cold. He turned and ran from the room, flinging open the front door and leaving the beach house. Only Greg reacted to it by feebly reaching his hand out in the direction Steven had gone.

“Ah, Steven!” he gasped. He looked back at Pearl and Garnet but neither of them responded. They simply stood, silent. Like islands in their grief. Greg didn’t wait long. “I’ll get him, uh…” he hurried after Steven, leaving the two gems alone. 

Pearl was quiet for a long while, her arms wrapped around herself, fingers digging into her skin. She was trembling. “Garnet…” she pleaded. “Tell me it’s all going to be okay.”

Garnet shook her head. “I can’t…”  
“Can you see anything…?”

“Nothing.” Garnet was trying to keep her voice steady. “She just went out like a light. She’s gone. She’s just… gone.”

“Are you sure…?” Pearl whispered. 

“I can’t see her, I can’t… I can’t sense her…” Garnet answered, stumbling through her words. 

Pearl put her hands over her mouth. She slid to her knees and dropped to the floor. “It can’t be… why… why wouldn’t they shatter her right there, if they were going to??”

“It might’ve been an impulsive decision…” Garnet answered, her voice shaking. “She might’ve reformed and put up too much of a fight…” She took a few steps towards Pearl, eventually coming to stand behind her. Garnet dropped to her knees as well. Peal turned and flung herself against Garnet’s chest, not crying as much as screaming against her and trying with all her might to muffle it. She curled her fingers into fists against her, nails digging into her palms until they hurt. Garnet held Pearl tightly, as tightly as she dared.  
–  
Steven hadn’t gone far from the beach house. He felt lost, unsure of where to go or what to do. He stood on the beach, watching the ebb and flow of the tide. He was afraid of his own feelings at that moment. There was nothing, just a cold, empty feeling. Although he’d shed a few tears, he wasn’t sobbing. He wasn’t screaming or crying or flailing, doing anything he thought he’d do if he’d ever lost one of the Crystal Gems. He was just… numb. He’d seen people’s grief on TV and in movies. He thought he knew what it looked like. But in himself, he didn’t recognize it. He was more afraid of how he was feeling than he actually took time to feel it.

“Steven? Hey…” It was Greg, approaching him from behind, almost cautiously. Steven heard him but he didn’t react.

“Dad…” Steven’s voice was soft and steady. Feel something, his mind seemed to scream. They’ll think there’s something wrong with you. But the wave of grief that he was waiting for didn’t come. Steven turned slowly, confused and lost. 

“Come here… it’s okay…” Greg closed the gap between himself and his son and he pulled him into a tight embrace. “It’s okay…” He kissed the top of Steven’s head and held him, rocking him back and forth. 

“I… I yelled at Garnet and Pearl… I…” Steven stammered. 

“They’ll understand,” Greg reassured him. “They’re not mad at you, buddy.”

Steven reached up to hug Greg back and finally he felt himself break inside. He let out a sob he felt like he’d been holding for too long. He fisted his hands into Greg’s shirt and just let it out, crying loud and openly. “Amethyst’s dead! She’s dead! I killed her, I… she was protecting me! I didn’t… I could’ve grabbed her gem. I was so close. I felt it touch my hand! I was so close!” He sobbed harder, his body shaking from the force of it. 

“No, kiddo. You can’t blame yourself. Don’t you start blaming yourself, okay?” Steven could feel Greg shaking his head. “Don’t start talking like that.” 

“But I was right there, dad!” Steven wailed. “And now she’s gone… I…” 

Greg was trying desperately not to cry as well, but after a while, he couldn’t help it. He picked Steven up and Steven curled in against Greg and Greg walked up the beach with him.  
–  
When the Crystal Gems had started out, there had been many of them. As the war took its toll, Pearl remembered how quickly she’d adjusted to dealing with the losses. It had been necessary, because in those times, grieving wasn’t a luxury any of the rebels could afford. Before long, she’d lost count of them all. Comrades would approach her in the battles and tell her who they’d counted among their dead. Pieces of shattered gems were gathered and bubbled. Dumped into mass graves, too numerous to be properly dealt with at the time.  
Rose’s “death”, if it could be called that, had hit Pearl harder than any of those deaths on the battlefield. But Rose had wanted it and Pearl begrudgingly respected her choice, even if it baffled her. The loss of Amethyst hit her like nothing else. Nothing she’d expected. It felt much closer, much more real than anything that had happened in the war. And it was out of control, unlike Rose, who’d gone of her own free will. 

Greg had taken Steven, and Pearl was afraid to be alone with her thoughts. She begged Garnet to stay with her, and Garnet obliged. They sat together in the beach house, huddled on the couch, and it had been hours since either of them had spoken. Garnet’s silent company was a comfort to Pearl, and she was grateful for it. Both of them had finished their crying jag, at least for the moment. Pearl felt like she’d been emptied out. Her eyes were dry and sore. She suspected Garnet felt similar. And although Pearl wanted to take the time to work through what she was feeling, she also knew that they potentially didn’t have long to mourn. It was possible that the Agates would be returning, perhaps with more gems, and they were short a gem of their own. 

Short a gem. Pearl dug her fingers into Garnet’s arm. How dismissive that thought had felt to her. No, Amethyst. You’re not just a gem, I didn’t mean it like that. Please forgive me. She didn’t know who she was sending that thought out to. Humans believed in things like the afterlife, or reincarnation and they had so many rituals and beliefs surrounding deaths. Pearl had never believed in such things. And yet she was already thinking about Amethyst like the other gem was able to hear her thoughts. 

She was just here. She was just here, yesterday. Pearl could look over and see her symbol on the temple door. She could imagine it opening, and Amethyst walking out, as she always did. She would stop in the middle of the room and pause, looking at the two of them on the couch. 

“Whoa, what’s got you guys so down?” she’d ask. “Cheer up, would ya?” 

It was so real, Pearl could see it so clearly in her mind. She’d stand up, in complete shock to see her there. But shock would be replaced with happiness. She and Garnet would run to her, but Garnet would hang back, let Pearl get to her first. Pearl would grab her tightly, pick her up, just hold her and sob. And kiss her.

How could she be gone? She’d just been there. Pearl could still feel her against her fingertips. Could still hear her voice. She’d just been there. Just yesterday. Just yesterday Pearl could’ve done more, held her, hugged her, touched her, and she didn’t. She didn’t. Why? Why had she allowed herself to be so standoffish? Why hadn’t she just given Amethyst what she’d wanted? Love, affection, care. Why had it mattered so much to Pearl that she remain dutiful and committed to their mission, above all else? 

I’m so sorry, Amethyst.

“Pearl. It’s morning…” 

Pearl felt Garnet shift against her and Pearl raised her head from her shoulder. Somehow the time had gotten away from her. The faint light of dawn had begun to come in through the windows. Pearl hadn’t noticed.

“Oh…” was all Pearl could say. Garnet got up from the couch, leaving Pearl’s side, and Pearl almost immediately stood up with her, reaching for her. “Wait, don’t…” 

Garnet put an arm around Pearl. “Okay.” 

“Thank you…” Pearl whispered. She was quiet for a moment. “Steven… he’s…?”

“With Greg…” Garnet answered. The reminder of Steven made her tense up.

“G-good…” Pearl said, softly. She felt like Greg was better equipped to be Steven’s rock at the moment. Pearl wanted to pull herself together before she saw him again. She wasn’t ready to see him. She wasn’t ready to see his grief mirroring hers. Fresh tears began to form, and Pearl felt a tightness in her chest. Garnet rubbed her arm, gently. 

“This is war… people die…” Pearl whispered, confused. “Why am I so… why was I so unprepared for this…?” 

“You can never prepare,” Garnet answered, her voice soft and soothing. “It never gets easier. We were distracted, back then… we didn’t have time. But now…” 

“Amethyst…” Pearl began to shake. She put her hands to her eyes. “Poor Amethyst… she must’ve been so scared… imagine how scared she was… I wasn’t there…” Her voice had regressed to barely a squeak. She felt Garnet’s hold tighten around her. “What do we do, now? Garnet…”

“What we always do,” Garnet replied, her voice sounding far away. “We move forward. We just keep moving forward.” 

–

In the days following, Greg had taken up a temporary residence at the beach house. His hovering presence, normally irritating to the gems, was welcome. Although the man was saddened by the loss of Amethyst as well, he felt like his grief was only a shadow of what Pearl, Steven and Garnet were feeling. He tried to give them their space when they needed it, but also give them a shoulder to cry on when they needed it as well. His being at the beach house was mostly for Steven’s benefit, to care for him and watch over him. But to his surprise, both Garnet and Pearl also treated him uncharacteristically warmly, thanking him multiple times for being there. 

Greg made dinner for Steven and carried it up to his bedroom. The boy was sitting on his bed, cross legged. Lion was curled up around him. He glanced over his shoulder when Greg entered and gave him a small smile. Greg had to stop and compose himself before he came closer to the bed. He took a seat on the corner of mattress not occupied by lion or boy. 

“Hey, Schtu-ball,” Greg greeted. He set the tray of food down. “You hungry at all?” 

“Not really, but I’ll eat…” Steven said, taking the tray on his lap. 

“Yeah, keep your strength up,” Greg agreed, smiling. 

Steven nodded and he mechanically ate a few spoonfuls of stew just to keep Greg happy. He knew his father was worried about him, and the last thing Steven wanted was more coddling. So he tried to remember to go through the motions, keep himself clean, go outside for walks, eat normally, even if his heart wasn’t in any of it. 

“So, I talked to Vidalia,” Greg began, trying to keep his tone light and conversational. Steven glanced up from his bowl. 

“Yeah?” 

“She says you can come over, you and the gems, when you’re feeling up to it. She’ll let you pick out some paintings to take.” 

“O-oh, that’s… yeah, that’s nice of her…” Steven said, softly. He hung his head. 

“No rush, though,” Greg added, quickly. “Sorry… that’s so soon, isn’t it? I thought it might make you feel better…” 

“No, it’s great, dad, thanks,” Steven assured him. “It just feels weird to think about. It feels so final.”

“Yeah…” Greg agreed, softly. “I guess it does.” 

“When did you guys hang mom’s picture?” 

“Heh… wow. Well we didn’t have anywhere to hang one for a long time,” he admitted. “But when the house went up, we talked about it and decided it felt like the right thing to do.” 

“It doesn’t feel right, not right now at least…” Steven mumbled. “But yeah, eventually. That might be…” He swallowed and nodded. “Yeah.”

“Well hey, don’t worry about anything right now,” Greg said, reaching to put a hand on Steven’s shoulder. “I’ll take care of things here. So you just work on you, just do whatever you need to do and I’ll be here. As long as you need.” 

Steven nodded again. “Okay…” he squeaked. 

“Aw, Steven…” Greg took the tray from him and set it aside so he could hug him before Steven could start crying again.

–

Steven could see the scene and it was moving in slow motion. The Agate rushing towards him, her weapon raised. In his dream, time was moving so slowly that he could turn all the way aroun and observe his entire surroundings. Pearl was in the background, watching with her weapon drawn. Garnet was running forward with one arm out, trying to stop everything from happening. But she was much too far away. Steven’s attention turned to Amethyst. 

Amethyst was coming in from one side, her body coming in between him and the Agate. Steven, knowing what it meant, started calling to her to stop. And then the weapon made contact with her gem. He saw her body jolt, go stiff. And then she retreated into her gem. The gem was in the air, spinning slowly. Steven swiped for it, desperately. If he could only grab it, then everything would be okay. But he couldn’t reach it. The Agate grabbed it first, her hand moving at regular speed while everything else was slowed down. The scene faded away into blackness. 

Steven felt like he was being hurled backwards through a wind tunnel. The force was almost enough to break his body and he could barely draw a breath before his arms and legs were flying uselessly in front of him as he fell backwards into a spiral, a patchwork of images. Colors and sounds swirled around him, threatening to overwhelm his senses. Talking, noises, voices, laughing, screaming, crying. The images around him were blurry but they ran fast, like watching a movie in fast motion. A thousand different scenes, playing out all around him. Steven’s body had finally stopped moving and he was hovering instead, inside a tunnel of sensory overload. 

He put his hands over his ears, trying to block it out. He squeezed his eyes shut. 

And then Amethyst’s voice cut through the chatter, coming in slowly and distorted at first, but growing louder and clearer, until it was all he could hear. 

“STEVEN!!”

It went on longer than natural, the final syllable holding for several drawn out seconds. Then it began to wobble and distort, turning to noise that continued to increase in volume. Steven groaned in pain, unable to shut it out. The tunnel of images suddenly went white with light. Every “screen” was suddenly white, shining with intensity so bright, Steven couldn’t even block it out when he closed his eyes to it. Just when it seemed the light was too bright to bear, it suddenly faded out and everything went dark. The noises, too, had subsided to little more than a murmur. There were voices again, but they sounded murky, like they were underwater. Steven couldn’t make out any words. 

Coming to his senses, Steven moved back and forth in the hovering space, trying to find something, anything that he could focus on. Voices having a conversation. But he couldn’t hear the words.

With a gasp, Steven opened his eyes, staring up at something familiar; his bedroom ceiling. He was lying on his back in bed. It was dark. It was the middle of the night. He’d been dreaming again. Steven remained on his back, breathing heavily for a few moments. He finally sat up. The house was silent and still. 

Steven got out of bed and he stepped down the stairs, walking across the living room. He passed Greg, asleep on the couch. He continued, walking towards the temple door. He didn’t know why he was drawn to go there. But he lifted his pajama shirt to activate his gem and the gem on the door glowed before the door opened to Rose’s room. Steven stepped inside and the door closed behind him.

“Hey, room…” Steven greeted. He was never sure if the room could think things or if it was actually a presence, but he’d gotten into the habit of saying hello to it whenever he went in. “I uh, was actually hoping to get to Amethyst’s room. Her real room, okay? Can you show me the way?”

The clouds parted to reveal a pole to slide down. Steven walked towards it. “Thanks.” He slid down, through the levels of the temple, until he’d landed in Amethyst’s room. 

There hadn’t been any discussion over what to do with Amethyst’s room and much like the painting, it just felt like it was too soon to deal with. Personally, Steven thought it was fine to keep it as it was. He wondered if that would’ve been too sad, though. But they’d left Rose’s room in the temple after she’d gone. Why wouldn’t they do the same for Amethyst? 

Steven wandered among the many things Amethyst had hoarded away over the years. He wasn’t sure what he was looking for or what he was expecting to find. He certainly wasn’t going to find Amethyst there. And yet.

He stopped, shock running through him. A few feet away was a hammock and it was occupied by someone. Someone under a large blanket. 

“Amethyst?” Steven asked, without thinking. The blanket shifted and Pearl raised her head from it. Steven was taken aback. “Pearl?”

Pearl sat up in the hammock, looking ashamed. She didn’t say anything at first. Steven took a few uncertain steps towards her.

“The blanket…” Pearl said, after a moment. She was looking down at it. “It smelled like her. So I…” She couldn’t get anything else out before she was covering her mouth and trying to stop herself from crying, to no avail. Steven stood next to the hammock.

“It’s okay, Pearl…” he said, gently. “I miss her, too.” He tried to get into the hammock with her and it wobbled back and forth. Pearl finally reached down and lifted him up and into it. He lied down with Pearl in the hammock and wordlessly wrapped the blanket around the both of them. He hugged Pearl against himself and Pearl cried quietly. Other than that, the room was silent.


	6. Resistance

The door to Holly Blue Agate’s room slid closed once she’d entered, and blocked off the boisterous sounds coming from the corridor. Only once she was closed off from the quartzes she was tasked with wrangling, did she allow herself a rare moment to relax and exhale. She all but slumped against the door, closing her eyes for a moment.

“Steady,” she reminded herself, speaking out loud. It was nothing personal. She told herself that, and once, regrettably, she’d told one of her quartzes the same thing. She could’ve gone back out there and personally delivered a beating to each and every one of those miserable creatures, but it hardly seemed worth the energy. She hadn’t yet figured out the most optimal way to deliver the most pain with the least amount of effort on her part. It was a constant struggle. The other Agates that she networked with and chatted to on occasion would gleefully trade secrets and suggestions. Plume mentioned she’d lined up her gems in a hallway and hit all of them down the line. So elegant and effective. Holly wasn’t entirely sure on the numbers she was dealing with, since she’d never had all the quartzes in one place at the same time. They were always moving around. She could’ve counted them, or did some kind of role call, but it was a waste of her time. Even if she missed a few in a line up, there was enough of her hands to go around and she’d hit all of them, eventually. 

It didn’t matter, anyways. They were a spirited bunch and she couldn’t cow them into full submission. As soon as her back was turned, they were making vulgar motions at her, she knew it. They would snicker and nudge each other if they thought she wasn’t paying attention, engaged in some private joke at her expense. In all the years she’d had the displeasure of working with them, Holly had never broken any of them.

It’s because they had each other, she supposed. They fed off each other’s energy, supported each other. The only way to break them would be to separate them. But no, that wasn’t allowed. Because Amethysts were mopey and depressed when they were alone. And their work would suffer for it. It would reflect poorly on her, as well. Holly just had to take it. It was a thankless job, but Blue Diamond had entrusted her personally with it. So she knew she was capable. She was thanking her lucky stars that they hadn’t rioted on her after the incident with the horrible Pearl and her friends. In fact, things seemed to be as normal as ever around the zoo. Holly had been tense, initially. But after several days of nothing out of the ordinary, she’d settled down, resumed feeling like herself.

There was a blue blinking light at her computer, indicating a message was waiting for her. Even so, Holly took a few minutes before she addressed it. She unfastened her capelet, tried to rub some of the tension out of her sore shoulders. She tilted her head back and forth a few times. Then she put her fists up and landed a few punches into her well-worn punching bag before she turned and finished it off with a kick that sent it violently swinging.

Feeling like she’d found her center once more, Holly daintily took a seat in front of her computer, refastening the capelet about her shoulders. She opened the screen to sort through whatever messages were pressing. The message in question was a video alert. Holly sighed and pressed it, letting the holographic screen flood the entire interface. It was Tourmaline, perhaps the only gem in the galaxy that she loathed more than her charges. Holly saw no need to sit up straight for her, even if she was one of Blue Diamond’s direct ambassadors. She wanted to send a clear message to Tourmaline. That she wasn’t worth her best behavior or respect. Of course, she had to keep it minimal, or risk being written up and reprimanded. But it was a dance she’d done many times with Tourmaline before.

“Tourmaline,” Holly greeted, dully. 

“My, my, you’re looking… well,” Tourmaline responded. She looked her up and down in a way Holly didn’t care for, before she smirked very faintly. “How are things at the human zoo, Holly dear? You’re such a good fit for the job, I always thought.” 

“State your business,” Holly muttered, rubbing her temples. “I’m not in the mood for chitchat.” 

“Dutiful as always,” Tourmaline said. “I really do admire that. Alright, I suppose this isn’t a social call. I’ll get right to the point. Some time ago, you were instructed to read up on something called Project Nonresistance. It was a few years ago… I trust that was enough time to get through it all?” 

“Yes,” Holly muttered, scowling, although she had to scan her memory for a moment to recall what Tourmaline was referring to. Nonresistance, yes. Some sort of gem reprogramming tool. “What about it?” She was disinterested. Tourmaline did tend to go on and on if allowed to. She hoped it wasn’t going to be one of those nights. She could already feel a tension headache settling between her eyes, a dull throbbing beginning.

“Well, not long ago we released a prototype weapon meant to… shall we say… restore problematic gems to their original settings,” Tourmaline explained.

“Really.” Holly examined her fingernails and absentmindedly nibbled on one. 

“Oh, Holly Blue! Picking up some bad habits from the betas, I see?” 

Holly paused, realizing what she was doing. “Kick rocks.” 

“Isn’t that your job?” Tourmaline asked, grinning. Holly glared at her and she ceased chewing her nail. “Anyway, as I was saying… tests were conducted in the beginning but there were some unfortunate… side effects. I suppose that’s why we conduct these sorts of tests on off-colors and war criminals, am I right?” 

“Mm. Sure.”

“But Yellow and Blue Diamond were insistent that the prototype was ready for a field test. Blue was very adamant about who she wanted the first real test subject to be…”

“Mmhm.”

“There’s been whispers about Rose Quartz, the rebel leader, residing on earth, to this day. Blue Diamond was hoping to capture Rose Quartz herself and reset her.”

“Once again, Tourmaline,” Holly interjected. “I don’t require the backstory. What does any of this have to do with me?” Holly was already well aware of Blue Diamond’s vendetta against Rose Quartz.

Tourmaline giggled behind her hand. “Well, wouldn’t you know it? The two Agates sent to earth used the prototype weapon on the wrong gem. They had to fall back. You can only use it once, you know. One charge, that’s it. It takes quite a lot of power to erase a gem’s mind. So now we’ve got an Amethyst with a blank slate, useless for intel.” 

“So shatter the miserable creature,” Holly answered, rolling her eyes. 

“You know how things are these days, Holly dear. She’s an era-1 Amethyst. A little defective, sure… but we can’t afford to be picky anymore. The Agates made an error, but it’s not all for naught. This is an opportunity to study how a real gem behaves after Nonresistance in a real, organic setting. We can’t pass this up. The data would be invaluable to Homeworld. They’re eager to roll out the Nonresistance program as soon as it’s ready.” 

“I think I know where this is headed, and let me assure you that I’m already up to my eyes in Amethysts as it is. I have no need for another one of those incompetent things,” Holly stated. 

“Then, you’d disobey a direct order from your Diamond?” Tourmaline gasped. 

Holly winced. “Fine… Have her sent over…” she relented. “I suppose I can put her somewhere.” Holly wasn’t thrilled with the prospect of taking on another Amethyst. But more pressing was her concern that participating in this Homeworld experiment would direct too much attention to the human zoo and how it was being run. It made her nervous. The Amethysts and Betas could behave themselves only in short bursts. Long term surveillance would reveal their true nature. “Anything I should be aware of…?” 

“I’m sending you some information, now,” Tourmaline answered. Within a few moments, several smaller screens had popped up showing video footage of the Amethyst going through a battery of tests. Holly barely gave them a glace. 

“You mentioned side effects?” Holly inquired. The screen filled with popups of notes and data that Holly only skimmed through, briefly.

“In the trial tests, yes… Aggression, hallucinations… Paranoia. And unfortunately none of the original test subjects lasted very long… But we’re fairly confident that those kinks have been worked out, since! This gem shouldn’t give you any trouble. At least, nothing you can’t handle.”

“What about her stats?”

“Weapon is a whip,” Tourmaline said. Further popups appeared, showing the information. “Fairly average speed and attacks. Somewhat below average in endurance… but, oh. Above-average reformation time. Says they clocked her at ten seconds at one test.”

“Sure, amazing,” Holly muttered, sarcastically.

“Oh, she’s undersized, too… Gem placement on her chest.” 

Holly paused, a memory coming to her. A horrible, horrible memory. “Wait… undersized? She uses whips? Gem on the chest?” 

“Yes.” 

Holly felt a shudder travel through her entire form. She knew exactly which Amethyst she was getting. And she became doubly nervous. “I… I don’t like the sounds of this. She sounds too defective. What am I going to do with her? And she’s one of the rebellion’s gems? She’ll cause an uproar in my zoo!” 

“Relax, she’s completely wiped clean, like I said,” Tourmaline replied. “As new as the day she came out of the ground. Nothing left of the old gem.”

Even so, Holly knew the other quartzes at the zoo would immediately recognize the Amethyst and they’d all get riled up. Not that she could say that without giving herself away. She was cornered and she was stuck. “Alright…” 

“Our Diamond will be so pleased!” Tourmaline gushed. “I’ll give out the order to have her sent over.”

Holly sunk lower in her chair, groaning. “Super.”

–

The Amethyst was delivered to the zoo a short time later. Holly ordered the Amethyst guards away from the entrance before she arrived. She didn’t want any of the quartzes at the zoo to be aware of the new Amethyst’s arrival until Holly could confidently say what she was dealing with. Although the Amethyst was escorted off the docking ship by two other gems, she seemed fairly lethargic and a few times she had to be nudged by one of the escorts to get her moving again when she stopped. 

Holly made a face when she saw the state of her. Her expression was blank and her eyes had a washed out, distant look to them. She stared directly forward, but was focused on nothing in particular. She was wearing her original Pink diamond soldier uniform. She was barely a gem at all. If she couldn’t even walk on her own, she was hardly useful for more than her raw materials and she was better harvested than reprogrammed. “What have you brought me?” she demanded. “This gem is faulty!” She waved her hand in front of the Amethyst’s face and got no reaction whatsoever.

“She’ll come out of it. Her consciousness hasn’t "booted up” yet,“ one of the escorts explained.

"Hopefully,” added the other one.

Scowling, Holly took her by the arm and tugged her into the zoo once she’d dismissed the escorts. The Amethyst stumbled along with her, offering up no protest. “You stay quiet,” Holly instructed her over her shoulder. The Amethyst said nothing. She didn’t look up or even acknowledge her. Holly was about to say more when two Jaspers rounded the corner and Holly tugged the Amethyst behind herself, to hide her. She walked past the Jaspers without turning her back to them, which made them both slow down in their walk and look at her in confusion. Holly scowled.

“What’re you gawking at!?” she demanded. 

“N-nothing, Holly Blue Agate!” both Jaspers stammered out in unison. 

“Then get out of my sight before you make me sick!” Holly snarled at them. They hesitated, then Holly raised a fist at them and that seemed to do the trick. The pair stumbled over each other in their hurry to get away. “Don’t RUN in the halls!” Holly called after them, although they’d already gone. She sighed to herself. The headache was coming back. It was exhausting at times, turning her aggression on and off. If only they just feared her the way she wanted, then she wouldn’t have to exert herself quite so much. Holly continued to drag the Amethyst along behind her but as luck would have it, they didn’t run into any other gems in the corridors.

“I don’t want any trouble from you,” Holly warned the Amethyst. She waited but got no response. “Even for an Amethyst, you’re quite stupid, aren’t you? Hello? This is your Agate speaking to you!” Silence. “They didn’t send me a gem, they sent me a glorified piece of furniture.”

Holly eventually came to a holding cell and she pushed the Amethyst inside. The Amethyst stumbled, almost tripping over but managing to regain her balance. She stood still, facing the wall. Holly was unnerved by her and she hurriedly put the force field up. Although she almost believed the Amethyst would simply stand wherever Holly put her, force field or not. 

Holly took a few steps back from the cell, scowling. It was the first time in her existence that she found herself questioning whether or not the so-called brilliant minds on Homeworld had in fact gone a little insane. Just because they’d discovered a way to wipe out a gem’s entire mind didn’t mean it was a good or useful idea. And if this was something that they decided to pursue, any one of them was at risk of being wiped out at the slightest infraction. At least a shattering was rare, because it meant destroying a gem, completely. Something Homeworld was less and less enthused about doing as resources continued to dwindle. This essentially destroyed a gem but left their body intact. A solution for Homeworld, but something that would certainly make other gems nervous. 

Holly was certainly nervous about it.

–

During the humans’ sleeping hours, the zoo ran on a skeleton crew, and it was considered a resting period for the gems as well. During those hours, the gems were typically in their cubbies, conversing with each other, cracking jokes, whatever horrible things they did in their off hours. Holly had assumed for the longest time that it was where they got together to plan her mutiny. It was perhaps the one thing Holly allowed for them. She didn’t barge into their room during off hours to harp on them. She couldn’t be bothered. She liked her rest, too. And somehow, they seemed to have an understanding. 

So Holly knew as she approached the room, that she was going to raise many eyebrows. It was the off hours at the time, and it was the only time she could think of where she was certain she’d be able to fetch a particular Amethyst without having to go tracking her down. She could hear them chattering away in the room. Holly raised her hand to knock, but then seemed to think better of it. She didn’t need permission to enter, even if it was their break. Holly threw open the doors and strode in, ready to deal with any gem who questioned her. 

A hush fell over the group as Holly stood there, sneering at them all. They were simply sitting in their cubbies, most of them. Some of them looked like they’d been play fighting. One of the darker Amethysts had the red Amethyst in a headlock, and they’d both just paused in that position, looking up. The other gems hurriedly performed the Diamond salute. Holly looked over each of them, trying to convey her absolute disgust. “Amethyst 8XJ,” Holly commanded. The Amethyst in question was perched up in her cubbie a few rows up and she hopped down from it and landed. She stood straight, performing the Diamond salute. Holly simply grabbed a handful of her pretty pink hair and yanked her towards the door before she booted her out with her foot, causing the Amethyst to stumble into the corridor. “Get out there!” Holly shouted. She heard murmurs behind her and she turned to face the group again, holding up a finger and daring any of them to say anything. They all went silent once more. Holly closed the door and she stood out in the hallway as 8XJ straightened herself out, looking baffled. 

Holly was quiet a moment, then her shoulders relaxed and she sighed. She wanted to apologize, but of course she couldn’t. They’d walk all over her if she showed remorse. But she did feel just the slightest twinge of regret over the way she’d yanked 8XJ out like that. She was on edge, but she felt like it had been a bit excessive, considering 8XJ had come down to her without any backtalk.

“You’re coming with me,” Holly said, her voice softer than she’d meant it to be. 

8XJ regarded her in confusion. “Where…? What’s going on?”

“Just… just come…” Holly mumbled. She walked in front and beckoned 8XJ to follow her. The Amethyst lingered by the door for a moment, but then began to walk behind her.

Holly had chosen 8XJ because, if she had to pick a favorite Amethyst of hers, it was her. Not that it meant much. It was a bit like trying to pick out a favorite rash. But Holly had singled her out long ago as a useful gem to have as her confidant.

8XJ was generally agreeable. She was socially popular among the other gems. And she was respected and adored by the Amethysts and Beta gems. Any time Holly needed to break news to the group that ran the risk of starting an uproar, she fell back to 8XJ to pacify and explain things in a way that the others could better handle. Unfortunately, 8XJ, or “Jay” as she was called by her peers, was too loyal to the group to actually fall in line as Holly’s minion or toadie. So Holly begrudgingly settled on using her as a buffer. She’d come as close to a friend as Holly would ever allow out of the zoo gems. Which admittedly wasn’t much. But it was a relationship that Holly was grateful for, not that she’d ever say it. And it didn’t mean that 8XJ got preferential treatment. Holly had to see to that. Sometimes it made her act overly aggressive with Jay, to try and compensate.

After the horrible Pearl and her traitor friends had left the human zoo, it had been 8XJ who came to Holly, trying to comfort her. Holly had of course rejected her and chased her off with her whip. But the gesture had touched her more than she’d realized it would. She hated thinking she was growing fond of 8XJ.

“A new Amethyst has come to the zoo. Blue Diamond herself has requested we take her in,” Holly explained. She didn’t need to look behind her to know that Jay was grinning. 

“No way, really?!” she exclaimed. “A new Amethyst?? From where? Do we know her?”

“Unfortunately, yes…” Holly muttered. She stopped in front of the cell, arms tucked behind her back. Jay popped out from behind her. She squinted into the cell. The new Amethyst had changed position slightly. She was facing them and she was standing, but tilted over slightly, with her head against the wall. She was wearing the same empty expression. Holly tried to keep her expression neutral but she was frankly, quite disturbed by the sight of her.

Jay took a step back from the cell, gasping. “That’s 8XM!” she cried. “What’s she doing in there?? What’s wrong with her?! Oh, stars… Oh…” She put her hands over her mouth, trembling. She looked to Holly with wide, fearful eyes.

Holly sighed and she turned off the force field. Almost immediately, Jay ran into the cell and stopped in front of 8XM. “Hey!” She grabbed her by the shoulders and shook her. “8XM, hey! Snap out of it! Holly, what’s wrong with her?” Her tone was almost accusing.

“Don’t get so familiar!” Holly barked. Then she calmed herself. “She was brought here… Homeworld has… well, they call it "resetting” a gem. Wiping out the mind, essentially. I can assure you, this isn’t my doing. I’d never stoop to this kind of low even if I was capable of such a feat.“ 

"Dang… I don’t think I’ve ever heard you say a bad thing about Homeworld in five thousand years,” Jay said in surprise. 

Holly scowled. “Yes, well… don’t you go repeating what you’ve heard. I’m allowed to have an opinion.”

Jay turned her attention back to 8XM and she pushed her gently. 8XM tilted, then righted herself. Jay was disturbed. “Is this just what she’s like now…?” she asked, her voice shaking. 

“Oh, don’t start with the blubbering, 8XJ,” Holly groaned, holding the bridge of her nose. She looked up and was met with Jay’s wide-eyed, on the verge of tears expression. “I was told her consciousness would return, eventually. But this is all experimental… I’m not so sure. I guess if it doesn’t, we’ll just keep her back here… Or maybe I’ll use her as a foot stool.”

It was a joke, a dark one to be sure but it clearly didn’t land with 8XJ because she looked mortified by the idea. Holly scoffed. “I’m fully kidding.”

“What do you mean by experimental?” Jay asked. She took 8XM by the hand and gently led her out of the cell, walking alongside with such care and concern on her features, it was as though she were walking with a human child. “Oh, I didn’t even notice she’s wearing her old uniform… That’s weird. They really did reset her…” 

“Ah yes, you reminded me…” Holly said. “Come, bring her this way.” Holly started down the hall and Jay followed behind her, leading the Amethyst by the hand. They stopped in front of a closed door and Holly punched in a code to open it. “You don’t have to be so gentle with her, she’s not conscious. It’s not as though she cares.”

Jay looked up at Holly with an offended expression. “So what, I should just yank her arm off?” 

Holly bristled at the backtalk, but she decided to let it slide. She needed Jay’s cooperation in this.

They stepped into the room and Holly activated the lights. It was a stark white room. The only thing inside was a large piece of machinery and a platform. Holly went to the control panel and turned the machine on. “You know what to do, 8XJ.” She gestured to the platform. Jay nodded and she led the Amethyst up the steps to stand on the platform. She carefully stood her up straight, pausing to look her over before she gave her a pat on the top of her head and left her there. Jay went to stand next to Holly, looking fretful. 

“I don’t like this…” Jay mumbled.

“Well isn’t it nice that Homeworld doesn’t care what you think,” Holly answered. She went through the Diamond colors. A diamond shape appeared under the Amethyst on the platform. First white, then yellow, as Holly turned the dial. She set it to blue. The diamond under the Amethyst turned to blue and Holly started the machine. It rumbled slowly and a large, circular disk was lowered down from the ceiling. It came down over the Amethyst and a blue light was emitted from it, scanning over her form a few times. The uniform she was wearing changed from pink to blue, becoming identical to the one Jay and the other Quartzes wore. Once the process was finished, the disk went back into the ceiling and the machine turned off. Holly stepped back from the panel, her hands on her hips. “Well at least she didn’t squirm around like some of you lot.” 

Jay was confused. “But where are her friends? The ones she came with, last time? The Crystal Gems?” 

“Back on earth, I presume,” Holly answered with a shrug. “She was captured.”

“Well… we’ve got to help her get back, then!” Jay cried. “She doesn’t belong here. You don’t even want her here.”

“We’ll do no such thing,” Holly said. “Homeworld is monitoring this. I’m expected to report daily on her progress, monitor her and document her.” Holly wasn’t pleased with the additional workload. “They’ll be expecting proof.” 

“But…” Jay was frowning. “Her family on earth. They must be so worried about her.” 

“It doesn’t matter, she’s as good as dead to them,” Holly replied. She looked to 8XJ. “I need you to work your magic on those Quartzes, 8XJ. Unfortunately, I need them to cooperate on this.” 

Jay frowned and she wrapped her arms around herself. “I guess… yeah,” she said, uncomfortably. “This is messed up, though.”

“For once, I agree with you,” Holly admitted, “But I don’t make the rules, as you know. I just enforce them.” 

Jay stepped back up onto the platform and took 8XM by the hand to lead her off. She felt the other Amethyst squeeze her hand, although it was faint. Jay stopped and looked down at her. 8XM’s expression had changed for the first time. Her mouth was slightly open and her eyes were half-lidded. She was blinking slowly, looking exhausted. But her eyes were clearer. Holly noticed it too and she leaned out from behind the panel. “Well it’s about time,” she muttered. 

“8XM?” Jay asked. She let go of her hand and stepped in front of her, kneeling down to her level and putting her hands on her shoulders. “Hey…”

8XM blinked again and her eyes moved to look at 8XJ and focus on her. “I dun feel good…” she mumbled. 

“I’m so glad you’re okay, peewee,” Jay sighed, smiling at her. She hugged her. “It’s so good to see you again.” 

“Again…?” 8XM asked. 

Holly coughed and shook her head at Jay. 

“Ah, uh… I mean…” Jay let 8XM go. “I guess this is technically our first time meeting. I’m Amethyst 8XJ. I came from the Prime Kindergarten on Earth, just like you did. You’re Amethyst 8XM. Err… Amethyst Facet-5, Cut-8XM. Heh, what a mouthful, right? Do you remember anything?” 

8XM frowned and she put a hand to her head, lifting the bangs from her obscured eye. She furrowed her brows, looking troubled. “I… no… should I…?” She looked uncertain. “Where am I, now? Am I on Earth?” 

“No, you’re at the Human Zoo. We’re in space. Nowhere near Earth. I’ll give you the full rundown a bit later, but basically when the war ended they just assigned us to this post because they thought earth gems had the best shot at taking care of humans. It’s um, kinda boring sometimes. But it’s alright. It beats getting our butts kicked by the rebels.”

8XM blinked a couple of times, clearly struggling to figure out what 8XJ was talking about. Then she smiled awkwardly and gave her a thumbs up. “That sounds really great, I’m happy for you, 8XJ.”

–

Holly walked back to her room, Jay and 8XM in tow. It was still the quiet hours and they didn’t run into anyone in the corridors, thank the stars. 8XJ was chatting happily to 8XM. Holly thought it was a little annoying, but in a way, 8XJ was inadvertently helping her gather data. 8XM didn’t have any memories of who she was before, but her original personality seemed to be intact. She had a vague understanding of Earth, the Diamonds, and who she was as an Amethyst. She was essentially, as Tourmaline had said, like a brand new gem out of the ground. Inexperienced and new, but aware of the basics, as she was made to be.

“So then we have 8XC, but we just call her Chip. Uh, sometimes we call her Red, too. She’s a really weird color for an Amethyst,” Jay was saying to 8XM. “It’s just easier with nicknames, honestly.”

“What’s Holly’s nickname?” 8XM inquired. 

Jay coughed, uncomfortably. “Ah… I’ll tell you when she’s out of earshot.”

“Oh, hahaha,” Holly grumbled from the front.

Jay continued, “There’s 8XK, but we call her Kay or Sharky or Fangy because she’s got kinda sharp teeth? We only have one Carnelian in the group, so she just gets to be Carnelian… I mean, we’ll have to do proper introductions, later. Carnelian will be really excited to meet you. She’s not the shortest, now! Heh. But she’s short because she came out of the ground, sideways. You just came out later. Ah but uh… that’s not a big deal, like… if you’re shorter. That doesn’t matter. Sorry.”

“I was kinda wondering why you’re so tall compared to me if we’re both Amethysts,” 8XM answered, grinning up at her. “You’re HUGE!” 

Jay looked flustered. “Aw, thanks!” 

Holly stopped at her door and opened it, stepping inside. Jay and 8XM stopped at the threshold. Jay’s shoulder’s raised and her back straightened. Holly walked into her room, paused, and looked over her shoulder at them. She looked annoyed. “Well get in here before someone sees you, morons!” 

Jay and 8XM stumbled inside and Holly closed the door. They stood awkwardly where they were. Jay held her arms to her sides, looking around the room. “I can’t believe I’m in here…” she said. Compared to her room that she shared with the other quartzes, this was much more lavish. It was small, but decorated with various items from Homeworld. Against the wall, there was a bed. The computer was nearby, for communicating with Homeworld, of course. The color scheme was identical to Holly’s colors. It was very personalized. Jay couldn’t wait to tell the others about it. They’d speculated that Holly had a wall of pictures just of herself in there. Jay was a bit disappointed that she didn’t. However, when she turned around a bit more, she realized that Holly indeed had pictures of herself on her wall and Jay started cracking up laughing.

8XM walked away from 8XJ to look things over. Holly sat herself in front of her computer. She heard a crash and she whirled around in her chair. 8XM was standing nearby, her arm outstretched. The shattered pieces of a geode were all over the floor. Holly got up from her chair, taking her whip out of her gem. “I don’t believe I gave you permission to touch my things.”

“W-wait, Holly!” 8XJ cried. She hurried to put herself between Holly and 8XM. “She didn’t mean it, come on! She’s new, remember?”

8XM cowered from Holly behind her much taller and larger “sister”. 

Holly glared but she put her weapon away. She shoved them both out of her way and knelt on the floor in front of the shattered pieces of the geode. “This was a gift…” she said, sadly. She picked up one of the pieces and held it in her cupped hands. The two Amethysts awkwardly hovered behind her, uncomfortably. 

“I’m sorry, Holly,” 8XM said. “Maybe I can fix it!” 

“Don’t you touch it!” Holly snapped at her. “You horrible clumsy Amethysts ruin everything!” She got to her feet. “I knew I shouldn’t have let you in here.”

“Why are we in here?” Jay dared to ask. 

“Because I need your assistance in writing the first report,” Holly answered, testily. “And she can’t be out and about on her own. Someone could see her. This is the only place on this clodding ship that no one will accidentally stumble across her.”

Jay burst out laughing. “Clodding ship?? Holly, you are in rare form!”

“Just get over here,” Holly said, beckoning the two of them towards the computer. “And for the love of Blue Diamond, don’t touch anything.”

Jay stood behind Holly but 8XM went and sat on Holly’s bed. When Jay noticed, she gasped. “Hey, don’t sit there!” she cried. 

“But it’s so comfy,” 8XM stated. She flopped down onto her back. Jay put her fist to her mouth, looking like she was going to pass out. Even though Holly’s back was to them, she knew what was going on and one of her eyes began to twitch. 

“I’m making a mental tally of all your transgressions, 8XM,” Holly said, her voice calm. “So I can beat you for it, later.”

“I.O.U. one beating, signed Holly Blue Agate,” 8XM said from the bed.

“She’s so feisty…” Jay mumbled. 

“It’s alright,” Holly answered, calmly. “I’ve been given a wonderful gift, 8XJ. A brand new Amethyst to throttle. It’s been so long.” She cracked her knuckles. “I think I’ll forgo the weapon, though. Using my hands just feels more… tactile.”

“Oh she’s… she’s sleeping.”

“Making a note of it.”

Holly got started on the report while 8XJ stood behind her. Although Holly did most of the writing, she occasionally asked Jay for input. Amethyst 8XM was alert, communicating normally, as mouthy as any of the other Amethysts at the zoo. Holly decided to write it up with exhaustive detail. Tourmaline would appreciate it, but more importantly, the more information she provided, the less likely they’d have to worry about surprise visitors coming to monitor 8XM’s progress.

Jay kept distractedly casting looks over her shoulder at 8XM, who had shifted to lie on her side and was curled up in almost a ball in the middle of the bed. Holly could see her doing so, out of the corner of her eye. She sighed. “She’s fine, 8XJ. You’d do well to stop fussing over her, so.” 

“I’ve got to make sure she’s alright…” Jay answered, softly. “I let her down once and I can’t… I don’t want to leave her behind again.” 

Holly finished the report and proofread it before she pushed herself back from the computer. She turned to look at 8XJ. “Oh stars above. Don’t tell me the Amethyst you were sniveling over that time was her.”

After the war, the Amethysts and Betas had been hastily assigned to the human zoo and Holly had been just as hastily tasked with watching them. With the Rose Quartzes out of commission, the human zoo was suddenly short caretakers. At the time, it seemed an odd fit to Holly Blue. Quartz soldiers, war veterans, tasked with caring for humans and performing the maintenance tasks around the zoo required to keep things running smoothly. The first day Holly arrived at the zoo, she ordered the group to stand at attention and she walked past each of them, hands behind her back, studying them and occasionally barking orders at them. Eventually she stopped before the Amethyst she would come to know as 8XJ. She was standing, performing the Diamond salute, but her expression was miserable. She was biting her bottom lip, sniffling, shedding tears she couldn’t seem to stop. 

The Amethyst next to her had been whispering urgently to her, telling her to knock it off. But when Holly stopped in front of them, she’d stopped. Holly gave 8XJ a hard look. 

“What in the galaxy are you crying over?” Holly demanded. 8XJ sniffled loudly, trying to speak but sobbing instead. The Amethyst next to her spoke, quietly. 

“She’s um… she’s upset over 8XM,” she explained.

Holly glanced around the group. “And which one of you miserable creatures is 8XM?” she asked. 

“She’s not here, she’s on Earth…” 8XJ whimpered. “We left here there… she’s all alone.”

“She’s not alone, Jay!” one of the other Amethyst’s piped up, sounding exasperated. “She didn’t come out. She was a dud!”

Holly had heard enough, and what was more, she didn’t care. It was unthinkable to her that an Amethyst would be blubbering over such a thing. It was ridiculous. She was embarrassed for her. Holly was new to her task and the gems she was dealing with were new to her. Holly didn’t know what to do. “You’re a soldier, start acting like it!” she said to 8XJ. 

8XJ nodded, numbly. “Y-yes, Holly Blue Agate…” 

“Go, get out of my sight,” Holly said to 8XJ, yanking her by the arm out of the lineup. She pushed her off down the corridor. “Go to your cubbie or something. Pull yourself together!” 

Jay looked confused by what she’d interpreted as an act of sympathy. Maybe. Buried under all those layers of disgust and disapproval. She hesitated in the corridor, uncertainly. 

“Go on, get!” Holly barked. Jay hurried away. Holly continued her walk down the line and the introductions went on without further incident.

“I didn’t know you remembered that…” Jay mumbled, somewhat embarrassed by the memory. She chuckled uneasily, scratching her cheek. 

“I suppose you were right about her,” Holly conceded. “But to cry about her, my word…” She shook her head. 

Jay shrugged. “Yeah… but I mean… she found her family, too. I was so happy the first time I saw her. Once we figured out who she was… I’m glad she wasn’t alone.”

Holly was quiet for a moment. Then she rose up from her chair. Things had gotten just a tad more sentimental than she liked, and she was a bit flustered by the change in mood. “Well,” she began. “I guess there’s nothing left for us to do except figure out how to integrate her into the group as seamlessly as possible. But for now, I guess she’ll stay in here…” Holly turned to the bed and she frowned at the sight of the little Amethyst curled up and snoring. “Will you wake her?” she asked Jay. 

“Yeah, right.” Jay went to shake 8XM awake and 8XM snorted and sat up, yawning. 

“I’m sleepy…” 8XM protested. 

Jay and Holly exchanged a look before Jay looked back at 8XM. “You’re actually sleepy?”

“Yeah…” 

“Lethargy could be a new side effect…” Holly mused, making a mental note to include it in her next report. She walked around the bed, tapping her chin as she observed 8XM. “Perhaps I can tie her up, somehow…” 

“What?!” Jay gasped. She hugged 8XM, protectively. 8XM was already dozing again, her head against her shoulder. 

“I don’t want her in here unsupervised, having free reign of the place!”

“She’ll be good!” Jay promised. “Look at her, she’s… she’s exhausted! She’ll probably just sleep. She won’t bother anything, I swear. And if she does, you can take it out on me, okay? Not her.”

Holly felt some of her anger drain. She felt a bit disarmed at the sight of Jay’s sentimentality, as she always did. “If you think I’m going to go easy on her just because she’s different…”

“Just give her a bit of time, at least…” Jay pleaded. 

“I don’t take orders from you, 8XJ. You forget your place.”

“I’m not ordering you, I’m asking you… as a friend.” 

Holly’s eyes widened and despite her best efforts, a horrible blush had fanned out across her cheeks. She stammered a few times, then turned away from Jay. “F-fine! Just… ugh….” 

Jay smiled softly and she set 8XM back on the bed, waking her up again. “8XM, we’re gonna leave you alone in here for a while, is that okay? You can just sleep. You’ll be good, right? You won’t touch anything?” 

“Okay…” 8XM agreed with another yawn. “Promise.”

“We’ll be back soon. Then you’ll be able to meet everyone. That’ll be fun, right?” Jay asked. 8XM was already asleep again.

Holly and Jay left the room and Holly closed and locked the door behind her. 8XM wouldn’t be able to let herself out without the proper code. The two of them almost ran into another Amethyst who was passing by. She stared at them with wide, surprised eyes. 

“Holy shit,” she muttered.

Holly glanced at Jay and then quickly shoved her away from herself. “8XK, you tell NO ONE what you saw, here!” Holly warned, jabbing a finger into the darkly-colored Amethyst’s chest. 8XK raised her arms up. 

“I-I won’t! I won’t!”

“Good.” Holly stood back from her. She looked back at Jay and then after a pause, Holly walked off, leaving them. 

Jay sighed, rubbing the back of her neck. She had her work cut out for her. And then she looked at the rather large grin Sharky was wearing. Jay pursed her lips together, looking away. 

“You were in Holly’s room,” Sharky stated. 

“I-It’s not what you think,” Jay stammered.

“Suuuure it’s not, okay. No, I totally believe you.”

“Believe what you want, then. I don’t care. I’m calling a family meeting.”

Sharky’s grin faded. “What? Why?” 

“There’s something… pretty big and pretty disturbing about to go down around here. Get everyone together, okay?”


	7. Awake

Pearl’s gem was nestled on top of a small pillow. The pillow was firmly gripped in Amethyst’s hands, although she resisted actually picking it up off the floor and risking having the gem slide off. She was lying on her stomach, watching the gem with eyes that glittered with intensity. She furiously scissor-kicked her legs up behind her. “And… now!” she commanded. She was met with silence. “…okay. Aaaand… now!” She frowned and gave the pillow a faint shake. “C’mon, Pearl! I wanna play! Where are you?”

“Amethyst?” 

Amethyst turned and flushed with embarrassment as Rose approached. She sat herself up, letting go of the edges of the pillow. She felt like she’d been caught in a private moment. She glanced away from the other quartz. “Um.”

“Pearl takes her time with regeneration…” Rose explained. She took a seat on the temple platform next to Amethyst, sitting comfortably cross legged. Almost immediately, Amethyst crawled into her lap and Rose put her arms around her, giving her hair an affectionate tousle. Amethyst rested her cheek against Rose’s chest. 

“How come?” she asked, glumly. 

“Mm…” Rose pondered it. “Pearl is very…” She searched for the word while Amethyst gazed at her like Rose had all the answers. “She’s quite… um… meticulous?” She laughed softly. Her laugh sounded nice to Amethyst, almost musical. “She likes to be precise and detailed… that’s our Pearl.” 

Amethyst worried her bottom lip between her teeth. “But she’ll be back, right? She’s not dead, is she?” That was her greatest fear, that Pearl had disappeared forever. The others had explained it to her already, after Pearl had sustained a bad injury on a mission. But even knowing that, Amethyst wasn’t so sure. She’d only been with the Crystal Gems for a few months. She was still wearing her original Pink Diamond uniform, still very much separate from the three of them. She wanted to be a part of the team, though. She wanted to understand everything about gems, about the history of gems, what they were, how they acted, she wanted to understand it all. But it was frustrating. 

Amethyst felt like she was sitting outside of an exclusive clubhouse or something similar. Rose, Garnet and Pearl, they’d all gone through… something together. Some big thing, some thing she wasn’t yet privy to knowing. They had a bond, the three of them. Amethyst, who had been alone much of her life until she’d met the Crystal Gems, found herself wanting desperately to be a part of their world. It was as though being around her own kind had awakened something in her. Alone, she’d felt no yearning, no emptiness. But since joining up with the gems, she felt more aware that something was missing. A piece of herself, her history, her heritage, that she had been unaware of until recently. And she wanted to take it in all at once. There were so many things she didn’t know, that the others knew. She felt like she was staring at a vast world through only a tiny window. Unable to appreciate its splendor to the fullest amount. And all because the Crystal Gems insisted on keeping her in the dark and easing her slowly into things. 

Amethyst looked again at Pearl’s gem sitting stark white against dark, velvety fabric. “I wanna be here when she comes back,” Amethyst said, stubbornly.

“I’m sure she’ll appreciate it,” Rose murmured. She threaded her fingers through Amethyst’s hair, which the smaller quartz found relaxing. Amethyst had an easy bond with Rose. Before Rose, she’d never been touched or handled by anyone. She’d almost broke down into tears the first time Rose had reached into her dark little corner and touched her hand. Again, something she didn’t know she’d needed until it was given to her. Touch, affection, being held, being understood. It was strange to Amethyst. She’d been fine until she’d met the others. Now she had so much more, but she was also so aware of what she stood to lose. She’d never had anything to lose, before. She was so afraid that they’d leave her if she wasn’t good enough. She didn’t know if she could go back to where she’d come from, back to her hole, and the rocks for company.

“I have to go,” Rose said, after a few minutes. She slid her hands under Amethyst’s arms and lifted her down. “I’ll be back, soon though. You know where to find Garnet if you need her?” Rose stood up at her full height, dwarfing Amethyst. Amethyst thought Rose was big, but she didn’t yet realize that it was because she was small. 

“Yeah, she’s in her room,” Amethyst answered with a nod. “I know.” 

“Alright…” Rose cast her sleepy-eyed gaze to Pearl’s gem and she smiled, faintly. “I think she’ll be back any minute.” She put her hand on Amethyst’s head, leaning down to give her a kiss on her forehead. Then she headed to the warp pad, drifting like a ghost, almost completely silent in her movements. She activated it and waved to Amethyst as she vanished. Amethyst waved back too late for it to be seen by her. 

There was a commotion behind her. A single musical note, a glow of light. Amethyst turned her attention back to the gem. It had lifted off the pillow and floated upwards, glowing brilliantly. Amethyst got to her feet, watching with wide eyes. The gem lifted high, and a body of light began to form. It shifted a few times, and then the light took form. Pearl was suddenly there, her body surrounding her gem as it had before. Her eyes were closed, her expression serene. Once the light went out, she dropped to her feet on the platform and she took a moment to give her body a few stretches. 

“Oohh…” Pearl sighed, tilting to one side and stretching out her arm. “That’s better.” 

She opened her eyes to take in her surroundings. She was on the platform at the mouth of the temple. It was night outside. From the shape of the moon in the sky, Pearl determined she’d been away for about five days. And then her gaze settled on Amethyst, who was standing back with her eyes wide and her mouth hanging open. Pearl was mildly surprised. She hadn’t expected a welcoming party at all. Not with how long she tended to stay within her gem.

“Amethyst?” Pearl asked. Amethyst broke from her stupor and she lunged forward, colliding with Pearl and hugging her tightly around the waist. Pearl stumbled back from the impact. Amethyst was small but she had a lot of power in such a little form. Even so, Pearl was patient. She knew Amethyst had never seen a gem lose their form and regenerate. She hoped Rose and Garnet had explained it to her sufficiently. But she had her doubts when she felt the front of her chest becoming damp, and then completely wet, and Amethyst was very obviously crying but trying to keep it in. 

“Ah, Amethyst!” Pearl cried, halfway between annoyed and concerned. She pushed Amethyst back a ways, wincing at the rather large wet and snotty spot on her newly formed clothes. Pearl crouched down to her level, hands on her shoulders. “Are you alright?” 

Amethyst sniffled. “I missed you…” she gurgled, her voice thick with tears and mucus.

“Oh… but… you knew I was coming back, right?” Pearl asked, her eyes wide with concern. 

“Y-yeah but… I didn’t know when!” Amethyst answered. Two trails of snot were running out of her nose and she took a moment to snort it all back in, which Pearl made a face at. 

“My goodness…” Pearl muttered, clicking her tongue. She took a handkerchief out of her gem and pinched it gently over Amethyst’s nose. “Blow,” she instructed.

Amethyst nodded and trumpeting into the handkerchief a few times. She handed it back to Pearl, who pinched it between her fingers and held it away from herself before she flung it off the platform and into the night. “You don’t need to worry, Amethyst. If my gem is intact, I’ll always come back.” 

“What if it’s not intact?” Amethyst whimpered. 

Pearl sighed. “Well… it hasn’t happened, yet. So let’s not worry about that scenario, okay?” 

Amethyst swallowed and nodded again. 

Pearl didn’t mind it when Amethyst trailed behind her, into her room in the temple. Even without asking, Pearl knew Garnet and Rose were off doing their own things. Although the temple was their home base, the gems frequently wandered to other corners of the earth, taking solo missions, living private lives… it wasn’t unusual. But they hadn’t left Amethyst alone, before. Not fully alone. So she determined that Garnet or Rose was nearby. 

Pearl picked Amethyst up and leapt onto one of the higher waterfalls in her room before she set her back down. Almost immediately, Amethyst began to sink into the water and she was fully submerged before Pearl noticed. Pearl hurriedly reached in and picked her up again, trying to set her on the water’s surface. She lessened her grip and she felt Amethyst begin to sink once more, which made her hold her tighter and lift her again. 

“You can’t walk on the water?” Pearl asked. 

“Um… maybe…” Amethyst answered, uncertainly. Pearl let her go again and Amethyst sunk a ways. She put her arms out at her sides like she was balancing, and then took a step up, her foot stepping onto the water’s surface. She brought her other foot up as well. Pearl looked pleased. 

“Oh, there you go! You did it!” Pearl exclaimed. 

Amethyst beamed, widely. “I did it!”

“I knew you could.” Pearl smiled at her. 

Pearl stepped into the center of the waterfall, bringing her collection of swords up from the watery depths. Amethyst watched before she took a few uncertain steps on the water’s surface, and joined Pearl at her side. She put her arms around Pearl’s waist, pressing in close. Pearl took notice of course, but she quickly resumed her task, rotating the circle of swords until she’d found the one she was looking for. She took it out of the air and the rest of them went back down into the water. 

“Glad everything’s right where I left it,” Pearl said with relief. She took a seat on the floor and Amethyst went down with her. She tried to crawl into Pearl’s lap, as she had with Rose, and was met with a bit of a shove. “Amethyst, really… Do I look like-” But she stopped herself. Amethyst was still looking at her with wide, concerned eyes. She sighed and relented, sitting cross legged and patting her lap. “Alright, fine…” 

Amethyst dropped into her lap, contentedly. Pearl tried to examine the sword with Amethyst blocking her somewhat. She unsheathed the blade and ran the pad of her thumb over the surface of it. Amethyst watched in fascination. 

“How come you don’t use swords when you fight?” Amethyst inquired. 

“The short answer is that I don’t have to carry my spear on my person,” Pearl replied.

“Oh.” 

Amethyst quickly grew bored with whatever Pearl was doing. She turned herself to the side, leaning her head against Pearl’s shoulder. “I’m glad you’re back. You look different…” 

“I thought I could use a new look,” Pearl answered. A smile quirked the corners of her lips. 

“It’s like you were on a trip and you came back or something…” Amethyst stated. “Um… what’s it like? When you… poof? Does it hurt?” 

Pearl shrugged a little. “Only for a moment. Once your body disappears, you don’t feel pain anymore.” 

“Where does it go?” 

“Into the gem.” 

“Why?” 

“To heal- you know this, Amethyst.”

“Can you get stuck in your gem?” Amethyst asked. 

Pearl had finally given up on cleaning the sword. She put it back in its sheath and set it to one side. She let her arms slide around Amethyst and hold her securely in place. “Not stuck, exactly… but you need room to emerge. So if someone was holding my gem or if it was in a small space, I wouldn’t be able to come out. If something was around it, blocking it.”

“What would you do if it was blocked?” Amethyst asked, worriedly.

“Just keep trying, I suppose…” Pearl replied. “Time doesn’t pass the same inside a gem as it does outside. I don’t really notice how long it’s been.”

“Can I be in your gem?”

Pearl had never heard of such a thing, but somehow it sounded like it was something inappropriate and she tittered, nervously. “Amethyst!”

“I mean like, if you got lonely…” Amethyst clarified. 

“I don’t think it’s possible for one gem to enter another’s gem…” Pearl admitted, although she wasn’t entirely sure. It wasn’t something she was eager to try, either. 

“Am I a real gem?” 

“Of course you’re a real gem,” Pearl asserted, confused. “You’re new to this, that’s all. You’ll learn everything in time. Just be patient.” She blushed when she felt Amethyst cuddle in closer. She wasn’t entirely used to the new gem’s need for affection and contact, but she allowed it because of Rose. 

After they’d found her, Rose had called Garnet and Pearl together for a private discussion on what to do. It had already been decided that they would “keep” Amethyst, as though it was ever up for debate. But Rose was concerned about how Amethyst had developed and socialized all on her own for so long. 

“She needs love, she needs care,” Rose stated. “We have to be gentle with her, and patient. Amethysts… they’re not supposed to be alone. They’re bonded to each other. We have to give her what she needs. Touch. Affection.” 

It was an odd mission to have, but Pearl took it with the utmost seriousness, as she did every one of Rose’s requests. As a Pearl, she didn’t feel the same urges to bond with other Pearls. She didn’t feel a kinship with gems of her own kind. Quartzes were typically grouped together. It helped them become better soldiers when they had a strong sense of comradery. Or something. Pearl hadn’t given it much thought. Not until Amethyst came along, at least. 

Amethyst was freely affectionate, touchy and cuddly. She was always trying to touch, always leaning against someone, holding someone’s hand, clinging to someone’s waist. If Pearl didn’t understand her situation, and if Rose hadn’t given them the talking to, she might’ve thought of Amethyst as a pest and discouraged such behavior. But Rose wanted to ensure Amethyst was socialized properly. 

“It’s no good…” Rose had said, sadly. “For Amethysts to be alone like that… It’s bad for them.”

It also seemed to be innocent enough, at least from what Pearl had experienced. Pearl even enjoyed it, in a way. Amethyst’s small size, her innocence, her cuteness and her willingness to be held and cuddled made it difficult to resist her. Although initially cold to what Pearl saw as an interloper gem out for Rose’s attention, Pearl had quickly warmed to Amethyst and she felt a fondness and a protectiveness over her.

A companionable lull fell over the pair of them. Pearl glanced down at Amethyst’s gem, which she could see clearly from her angle. She had a very pretty gem, Pearl had thought. Rather absentmindedly, Pearl reached to touch it with her fingertips. She felt Amethyst’s body jerk up and her breath hitched. Pearl withdrew her hand, curling her fingers into her palm. 

“Ah, sorry…” she apologized, somewhat embarrassed. It was very rude of her to go touching Amethyst’s gem without permission. She didn’t know why she’d felt like it was appropriate. 

“No, it’s okay…” Amethyst answered. “Um… you can touch it if you want. I was just surprised.”

Pearl raised an eyebrow but curiosity got the better of her and she slid her hand down Amethyst’s chest once more, running her fingertips over the faceted surface of her gem. Amethyst reacted by drawing in a sharp breath. Pearl paused. 

“Is it painful?” she asked, confused by the reactions. 

“N-no…” Amethyst’s cheeks darkened in a blush. Pearl felt herself blush as well. 

“I can stop,” Pearl stated. 

“No, don’t…” 

Pearl bit her bottom lip. Oh stars, she didn’t know what she was doing, but she kept touching Amethyst’s gem. She began to rub it, slowly. Amethyst tilted her head back, letting it fall back against Pearl’s shoulder. Pearl took a moment to move Amethyst so they were sitting back to chest, Pearl directly behind her. Then she began to rub her gem again. Amethyst closed her eyes, her mouth falling open, slightly. 

“Ah… that feels… really good…” she whispered. “I didn’t know it could.”

“Amethyst,” Pearl whispered, observing the other gem’s expression. “I want to do something… if I may.” 

Amethyst groaned, her eyes opening halfway. “What?”

“I want to kiss you. Can I?” 

“Okay…” Amethyst agreed. And then a beat later. “What’s a kiss?”

“I’ll show you,” Pearl said, simply. She turned Amethyst in her lap once more, so they were facing one another. There was a pause between them, and then Pearl took the initiative, leaning in and pressing her lips firmly against Amethyst’s.

–

Pearl awoke with a start and the hammock she’d been lying in swayed back and forth from her sudden movement. She sat up, gripping the sides of it. She was breathing hard. She didn’t remember falling asleep at all. It felt so real. A memory, initially, but it had turned into something else. Pearl lowered herself back down again in the hammock, sighing miserably. 

Just a dream. At least no one had been there to see it. 

She eventually got out of the hammock and put her feet on the floor, although she found herself still clutching Amethyst’s blanket. It was just a blanket, she knew that, but she didn’t want to leave it. She decided to store it inside her gem, and did so. She headed out of the temple door, not feeling all that ready to face the world, but knowing she had no choice. 

“Be careful, Pearl.” 

Pearl almost jumped a foot in the air when she realized Garnet was standing next to the door, waiting for her. Pearl spun to face her, eyes wide. Garnet was leaning against the wall, her arms crossed. Once Pearl calmed down a little, she registered Garnet’s words.

“What do you mean?”

Garnet stood back from the wall and straightened. “You’ve been spending your nights in Amethyst’s room…”

Pearl gasped and she looked down, feeling ashamed. She put a hand over her mouth. “Oh, Garnet…” she said, softly. “I-I know. It’s not good, is it? But it’s comforting to me… I’ll stop, but… I’m not ready to, yet. Please understand… I really need this. Anything. I…”

“Pearl, I just meant be careful because with Amethyst gone, there’s nothing to keeping her room together,” Garnet clarified.

“Oh…” Pearl frowned. “Wait… what?”

“I expect her room will start to fall apart at some point,” Garnet explained. “Without Amethyst, it’s just inevitable.”

Pearl was alarmed. “But… when Rose…”

“Rose’s gem was always intact,” Garnet pointed out. “Amethyst’s gem isn’t. I’m surprised her room didn’t collapse in on itself immediately. I guess our magic is keeping it stable for now.”

Pearl had begun to panic. She was trembling and she put her hands on her head, trying to figure out what to do. Trying to calm herself.

“It’s just a room, Pearl.”

Pearl snapped her head up, eyes blazing. “I can’t believe you just said that, Garnet,” she whispered, harshly.

Garnet scowled. “It is just a room, though.”

“It’s not just a room!” Pearl cried, throwing her arms open. “It’s… it’s a part of her! It’s her room!”

“Was her room,” Garnet corrected her. “Now it’s just a mess to deal with. And it’s dangerous to leave it as is. We need to disassemble it.”

Pearl was floored by the suggestion. And the way Garnet spoke. She couldn’t believe it. “It’s barely been a week, Garnet! She’s barely been gone a week! No, it hasn’t even been a week… It’s been five days. Five days! And you’re already talking about erasing her…”

“You need to get a hold of yourself,” Garnet said, putting her hands on her hips.

“Excuse me??” Pearl gaped. “What is the matter with you? I can’t believe how callous you’re being right now!”

Garnet was finally getting angry. “I’m thinking about all of us, or what’s left of us, Pearl!” Garnet shot back. “Like it or not, we’re still in danger and we’re STILL the Crystal Gems! We have to take care of these things before they get out of hand, whether Amethyst is here or not! I know it feels good to lie in her hammock all day and sniff her blanket but-”

“Don’t you dare…” Pearl warned.

“But we HAVE to keep going!” Garnet finished. “It’s dangerous to let ourselves be vulnerable at this time! And I’m worried you’re going to turn this into another Rose thing…”

“What.” Pearl stared at Garnet in shock. Then with a surge of fury, she slapped her. Almost immediately Pearl gasped and put her hands over her mouth. Garnet didn’t react, except to turn her face from the force of the strike.

“Pearl!” Steven’s voice cried. Pearl turned to see that Steven and Greg had just arrived home from a grocery run. Steven had dropped the bags he’d been holding. Pearl kept her hands over her mouth. Not knowing what else to do, she simply ran from Garnet. She pushed past Steven and Greg and ran out the door, ignoring Steven’s pleas for her to stop and wait.

—

Pearl had never associated the Prime Kindergarten with good things. But she’d found herself there, walking quietly among the empty holes that lined the cliff sides. It was such a dark, unhappy place. It was a dead zone on the planet’s surface, devoid of life. It had always been a disquieting experience to go there.

Amethyst had never admitted to how often she went, but Pearl had always suspected that she’d gone back to the Kindergarten on a regular basis. Pearl had tried to understand the appeal. What it could’ve meant to her, aside from lonely memories. Her dislike of the place had always been obvious. Perhaps that was why Amethyst had never tried to share it with her. Why she’d always seemed so private about the Kindergarten and her origins in general. They’d made her ashamed. Pearl had made her ashamed of who she was.

Pearl tried to imagine how she would’ve felt if someone she was in love with had been disgusted over where she had come from. To the point of wanting to erase it. To pretend it didn’t exist. It was no wonder Amethyst had been so insecure. With Amethyst gone, all Pearl could think about was how many mistakes she’d made with her. How small and pointless their fights had been, in the big picture. They’d been so different, but they were also similar in ways that Pearl wished they hadn’t been. They both sometimes hated themselves. They were both insecure, both felt powerless, both felt alone. Maybe together they would’ve done nothing else except be miserable with company, but at least they wouldn’t have been alone.

It wasn’t difficult to locate Amethyst’s exit hole among the others. Pearl stepped up to it and crouched down to look inside. She could so easily imagine Amethyst inside it, curled up and facing the back wall, just resembling a poof of purple hair with feet. “Amethyst?” Pearl would whisper to her, lingering at the entrance. She ducked down, having to stoop quite a lot to get inside. “I’m coming in, okay?”

She slid in against the wall and took a seat, knees up to her chest. “I want to tell you… how sorry I am for the way I’ve always treated you.” Pearl looked down and put her arms around herself. “I always treated you like you were less of a gem because of where you came from. At least… that’s probably how it seemed. But it wasn’t how I felt. I… I was so proud of you.” Pearl felt tears gather in her eyes and she tried to blink them away. “You’ve come so far, Amethyst. I was never able to tell you how much I cared about you, how happy I was to call you my friend… how precious you were to me. Why didn’t I? Maybe I couldn’t have fixed everything but you needed me, didn’t you? You needed me to tell you those things. You needed to hear them every day. How much you were loved, how much you were appreciated. How perfect you were. Because you couldn’t tell them to yourself.”

Pearl began to cry, softly. “I’m so sorry… I’m sorry I didn’t love you enough… I do love you, Amethyst. I love you so much. I always loved you. The moment I saw you, I think I fell in love with you. Do you remember that? We came here, not knowing what to expect. We were so worried about you, how you’d turned out. We thought that you’d be so broken because you’d been alone so long. But you surprised us all. You were so strong. So much stronger than I’ve ever been. And I never gave you nearly enough credit. You’re not good despite where you came from, Amethyst. You’re good because of where you came from. This place… I never understood what it meant to you. But it was a part of you, such a big part of you, and I was so eager to pretend it wasn’t. That was wrong of me.”

“Geez, P. You’re just talking and talking… It’s fine, okay? I know you care, deep down. You don’t have to get all mushy over it.”

“We could’ve been good together…”

“You’re just saying that.”

“We could’ve tried…” Pearl sniffled. “There’s no harm in trying, is there? I already love you so much as my friend. Love can grow, can’t it? It can change.”

“Sure… but you don’t have to do it just to make me happy. I want you to be happy, too.”

“You make me happy, Amethyst… please come here. Please? Can’t I just hold you, again?” She held out her arms.

Amethyst crawled over to her and Pearl picked her up, wrapping her up in her arms and holding her tight. She sobbed and held her, rocking her and burying her face into her hair. Pearl’s body wracked with her sobs and she tried to smother them against Amethyst. “I’ll never, ever, ever let you go, Amethyst… Never ever. I swear, I’ll never let anyone hurt you. I’ll tell you every day, how special you are. I’ll hold you every day. I’ll never let anything else ever make you unhappy. I promise.”

Amethyst said nothing, just held Pearl back. And eventually Pearl’s sobs began to die down, because she’d exhausted herself with them. Eventually she stilled. Her arms dropped to her sides and she looked out of the hole. There was just silence and stillness. She shifted in her position, slowly lowering herself down to lie on her side. Her gem began to glow, and she took Amethyst’s blanket out of it. She wrapped herself up in it. Amethyst’s scent lingered in the fabric, but Pearl felt like it was fading away. She didn’t know if she was strong enough to go through this again. Even knowing that Steven and Garnet were counting on her. Even knowing the fight wasn’t over, and at any moment, their enemies could return. Pearl didn’t know if she could do it. She’d had to call upon so much of her inner strength after Rose had gone. She didn’t know if she had any left.

 

–

“Pearl’s been gone a long time…” Steven said, fretting as he looked out the window at the presently darkening sky. “She should be home by now, right? Right, Garnet?” He turned to look at her. Garnet was sitting on the couch, one leg crossed over the other, arms stubbornly folded in front of her chest. “What if she’s in trouble?” Steven pressed. 

“Pearl can take care of herself,” Garnet muttered. She avoided Steven’s pleading eyes, knowing she couldn’t say no to him if she could see how worried he was. “I’d see if she was in danger.”

“But she’s sad…” Steven continued. He went over to Garnet’s side, putting his hands on her leg. Garnet pursed her lips and looked away from him, but she was breaking out into a sweat. 

“Garnet, please!” Steven cried. “I want all of you close, right now… I want you and Pearl here. Please… whatever you two were fighting about… it doesn’t matter. I just want you two to be here, okay? Please don’t… go anywhere, right now. I need you both here…” He’d started to cry and Garnet felt all her resolve crumble. 

“O-okay. Alright…” Garnet hurriedly reached down and picked him up, setting him on her lap. She wrapped her arms around him and held him close. “I’ll go find her. I’ll apologize. Just please don’t cry, Steven… I can’t handle it when you cry.”

Steve sniffled loudly. Garnet squeezed him, then set him back down so she could stand up. “She’s at the Prime Kindergarten. I’ll bring her back.” 

“Amethyst’s kindergarten?” Steven asked, wiping his eyes. “What’s she doing over there?” 

Garnet said nothing but she began to walk to the warp pad. Steven followed her. When Garnet stopped on the warp pad, Steven put a hand on her leg. “Garnet…? Pearl, she…” Steven frowned to himself. “She misses Amethyst the most, doesn’t she?” 

Garnet paused, unsure of what to say. “Pearl misses Amethyst a lot…” she answered. 

“Yeah, but… she’s worse than we are… she’s in way worse shape, don’t you think?” 

Garnet didn’t answer, and Steven continued. “Were they in love?” 

“I don’t know,” Garnet sighed. “It doesn’t matter now, anyways.” 

“Yeah…” Steven stepped back off the warp pad. “Poor Pearl…” 

“I’ll bring her back, Steven. Don’t fret,” Garnet promised. “Stay here with Greg. We’ll both be back, soon.” The warp pad activated, and Garnet vanished. 

Greg was out on the patio when Steven came out. He stopped abruptly as Greg turned to look at him, a guilty expression on his face. He hurriedly put out the cigarette he’d been smoking and pitched it over the side of the railing. “A-ah, hey Schtu-ball…” 

Steven sighed “Hey, dad.” 

“Garnet went to get Pearl?” Greg inquired as Steven came to stand next to him. 

“Yeah, I hope so…” Steven mumbled. 

“Well hey, don’t worry about it!” Greg said, smiling. He put his hand on Steven’s head. “They’ll make up. You know, I’ve seen them fight before. Before you were born, they got into it, once. But they made up and it was fine. Gems are… I don’t think that stuff is as big of a deal to them as it is to us.”

“Yeah, you’re probably right,” Steven agreed. 

The two of them headed back into the house. Greg was trying his best to cheer Steven up. “So I was thinking maybe we could do pizza tonight, what do you say? Extra large, stuffed crust, everything on it. How’s that sound?” 

Steven sat on the couch and then tipped over to lie on his side. “Okay…” he sighed, closing his eyes. 

Greg frowned. “And then uh… maybe we could rent a movie or something. Just do something fun. Take our minds off the heavy stuff, just for a while.” 

“Mmkay…” Steven drawled. 

“Steven?” Greg asked. He stepped over to the couch. Steven was dozing off. 

“Order for me…” Steven murmured. “I’m just gonna rest for a sec…” 

Greg sat next to him on the couch, getting out his cell phone. “Okay, kiddo. Just relax, I’ll take care of everything…” 

“Thanks, dad…”

–

There was murmuring again. Strange, murky noises, like hearing something underwater. There were echoes, but they were faint and getting fainter. The more Steven tried to grab them, the further away they drifted. There was a dull light in the darkness. It was barely a light at all, but it was there. And slowly it grew brighter, enveloping Steven in a blueish haze.

Everything faded in, slowly. There was a strange, sterile hum that filled the air, steadily. The faintest of voices. And then Steven was awake. He sat up, rubbing one eye. “Dad, can you get me a cream soda, too?” The voice that came out of his mouth wasn’t his own and Steven stopped, realizing he wasn’t on the couch at home, anymore. Where was he? 

He stared around the small room he was in. It was lit up in blueish light and filled with strange trinkets and decorations. Steven was sitting in the middle of a large, lumpy bed, mostly a nest of pillows. He got off the bed and stood on the floor, looking around in confusion. 

“Dad?” he called, uneasily. There was of course no answer.

“Where am I?” he asked. “WHO am I?” He looked around the room and finally his eyes found a mirrored wall. Steven’s gaze rested on the reflection looking back at him and he stumbled backwards, hands clasping over his mouth in shock. “A-Amethyst!?” he gasped. He pressed himself against the far wall, staring with wide eyes at the shocked reflection looking back at him. Fearfully, Steven took a few uncertain steps towards the mirror. As if afraid that if he moved too suddenly, Amethyst would disappear.

It didn’t feel like he was dreaming. It felt so solid, so real. Everything felt like reality. He reached out, touching the mirror’s surface. Amethyst was staring back at him. He watched tears gather into her eyes and then he felt them stream down his own face. “Amethyst…?” His voice broke, but it was her voice coming from his mouth. He was in her body. He hugged his arms around himself, dropping to his knees on the floor. If this was a dream, it was the cruelest thing he’d ever dreamed about. 

No, he was certain. He was shaking, struggling to comprehend it. He checked her gem. Completely solid, nothing to suggest she’d been shattered. Had ever been shattered. Not that there was a way to come back from that. Had Garnet made a mistake? She’d described it as Amethyst “going out” like a light. She’d said she’d been able to sense her, always, and then she was gone. What did that mean? 

Steven pressed against the mirror, his forehead resting against the cool surface, and he began to shake with his sobs. “Are you really alive?” he sobbed. “Is this really you?” He looked down at the uniform she was wearing. He realized he needed to figure out where she was being held. 

Getting to his feet, shakily, Steven looked around the room. He approached the door and tried to open it, but nothing happened. There was a clear punch code to press and he tried a few times to input the right code. The door didn’t open. He banged his fists on the door. “Where are you, Amethyst?” he cried. “What can I… where is this?” He ran back from the door and crossed the room. There was a single window in the room and he got up to look out of it. He was definitely in space, not on some other planet. But aside from that, he didn’t have much to go on. 

And then he felt a surge of… something. In his head. Steven staggered backwards, holding a hand to his head. He was beginning to lose focus. His vision was blurring. “W-wait, I can’t go, yet…” Steven pleaded, unsure who he was pleading to. “I don’t know where you are, Amethyst!” 

But he was leaving her body, his consciousness fading away. The room around him went dark, and he was gone. A moment later, he sat up again, gasping and clutching to the couch. Greg was kneeling next to him and he jumped back a ways when Steven reacted so suddenly. 

“Whoa!” Greg cried.

Steven was breathing heavily and he stared around, his eyes wild. He focused on Greg. “Dad!” he choked out. He reached for Greg and hugged him tightly. Greg was confused but he hugged him back. 

“Steven, are you okay? Did you have a bad dream, buddy?” Greg asked, worriedly. 

Steven pulled back from him and gripped his father’s arms. “No!” he cried. “Amethyst, I… I saw her!” 

“Were you dreaming…?” 

“I wasn’t dreaming!” Steven let go of him and he got off the couch. “I… I was there, she was there… but then I lost her! But she’s alive, dad! She’s alive!” 

“Whoa, just slow down, you’re going a mile a minute,” Greg said. 

“Garnet and Pearl…” Steven whispered to himself. “We have to tell them! Ah…” He looked to the warp pad. 

“They’ll be back soon, Steven,” Greg assured him. “But come on, you gotta fill me in, here. How do you know Amethyst’s alive?” 

“Because I was in her head…” Steven answered. “I didn’t get a chance to figure out where she is but… she’s alive. S-she’s really alive…” Steven started laughing a bit, and then he was crying again and Greg worriedly held him. 

“We gotta tell the gems, then,” Greg said. Steven nodded.


	8. Contact

8XM had felt a strange presence with her and when she woke up, she was standing in the middle of Holly Blue’s room. She’d been crying. She reached up to wipe away the tears that were running down her face and she drew her hand back, staring at her wet fingers. She could only feel horribly confused. Had she been dreaming? Sleepwalking? Did she do either of those things? She didn’t know. She didn’t stop crying though, not right away. She couldn’t help it. She sniffled and wiped her nose and eyes.

“Why am I crying…?” she asked herself. Her voice was hoarse and small.

She felt a loss. like she hadn’t been alone for a few minutes, and then she’d been left alone again. Someone had been there with her but she had no idea who, and she didn’t need to look around for them to know they’d gone.  
  
8XM returned to sit on the bed, trying to calm herself down. She vaguely remembered promising 8XJ that she wouldn’t touch anything and she wanted to feel like she could be trusted with that simple request. She didn’t know why, but she felt like Holly and 8XJ were really sticking their necks out for her. 8XJ had been so kind and concerned about her. Holly, not as much. But they were the first gems she’d ever met, at least as far as she could remember, and she felt a bond with them. She wanted to be good for them. She felt as though they could send her away if she wasn’t good enough. She didn’t know where they would send her to, or why she had that thought, but it troubled her all the same.  
Knowing she was stuck in the room until Holly or Jay returned for her, 8XM sat and fidgeted. It felt strange, being alone with her thoughts. She’d only existed for such a short time, at least as far as she could remember, but she’d never been alone until that moment. She decided that she didn’t like being alone. In fact, she began to feel a building sense of panic inside her, the longer she thought about it. She was alone. What if she’d been abandoned there? What if they kept her in this room for years? What if Jay and Holly forgot she was there and never came back for her?

8XM got off the bed and began to pace, feeling like a caged animal. No, she had to be good. Jay wouldn’t leave her, would she? She wouldn’t let Holly leave her. Why did she have to be good, though? What would happen to her if she wasn’t? 8XM’s thoughts had introduced doubt into her like it was a poison. She began to feel the panic rise. Maybe she wasn’t good at all. Maybe she wasn’t good enough to be here. 8XM fisted a handful of her hair. She felt dizzy. Her chest was tight. She felt like she was being smothered, or drowning. She took several deep breaths, but she couldn’t seem to get enough oxygen. She didn’t even need oxygen.

“Shit, shit, shit…” 8XM muttered to herself. She resumed pacing, her eyes on the floor. She didn’t know where she’d heard the curse word from, but she didn’t care. It felt good to say it. She didn’t know anything, not really. How did she really know what Holly and Jay had planned for her? She’d put blind faith in them, that they had her best interests in mind. But what if they weren’t her friends? What if they weren’t gems she could trust? How did she know? She didn’t know anything. Nothing was coming to her. She didn’t know anything about where she was, or who she was. It didn’t seem right. Wasn’t she supposed to know more? Was there something missing?

8XM felt like she’d lost something. She didn’t know what it was, but the loss had settled over her. It was almost an ache inside her. She just knew something. Something was wrong with her. Something had happened to her. Something bad.

A light caught her attention and 8XM looked up through wide, teary eyes. Holly’s computer light was blinking. 8XM sniffled and she walked over to the computer, looking down at the controls. It was too high for her to reach, so she sat in the chair and scooted it over to the panel. She touched the button and to her surprise, something happened. A holographic screen popped up. The gem on the screen was one 8XM didn’t recognize, naturally, but she had the sense that she was a high ranking gem. She just had a fanciness about her. 8XM regarded her in bafflement. Holly was going to be mad that she’d touched her computer.

The gem in question was Tourmaline, and she seemed just as surprised to see 8XM there. “Oh! How odd. I was just calling about you, and now, here you are.” She giggled. “Isn’t that silly? I don’t suppose your Agate is around?”

“She’s not here…” 8XM answered. She didn’t know exactly why she was taking the call. But she was so lonely and she was almost desperate to talk to someone, anyone, who could make her forget her panic for a moment.

“Oh… pity. Well, let her know that Tourmaline is expecting her call.”

“W-wait!” 8XM cried. “Don’t go! I…”

Tourmaline raised an eyebrow and pursed her lips. “What.”

“I-I know you’ve probably got lots of stuff to do but… can you just talk to me, for like… just for a little while?” 8XM pleaded. “I don’t want to be alone.”

“You’re alone?” Tourmaline asked. “Wait, why are you in Holly’s room?”

“She left me here so I wouldn’t get into trouble, I guess…”

“I didn’t know she was getting so cozy with her quartzes,” Tourmaline said, distastefully. “Hmm… I suppose I should bring that up with Blue Diamond…”

“Your name is Tourmaline?” 8XM asked.

“Paraiba Tourmaline,” she answered, proudly. “But yes. Not that you’d understand how important I am, but I’m very close with our Diamond. I’m one of her most trusted advisers. She’s asked me personally to check in on your progress.”

“My progress?”

“Of course. You’re new to the Zoo, you have to be monitored.” Tourmaline looked 8XM over. “Hmm… well, I suppose I can compile some data, myself.” She settled herself more comfortably in her chair. 8XM noticed something move behind her. Another gem, who paused to glance at the screen before hurrying on out of the view. Tourmaline noticed 8XM looking and she glanced over her shoulder. “Oh, that. She’s my Pearl. Honestly, I don’t know what I’d do without her around here. It’s so hard to get decent help these days. It’s nice when the help is made just to your specifications.”

“Sure…” 8XM mumbled, although she didn’t really know what Tourmaline meant.

“Anyways,” Tourmaline sighed. “It looks like you’ve gotten settled in a bit. You’re wearing the correct uniform. I don’t suppose you’ve been tasked with any work, yet.”

“No…”

“Hm.” Tourmaline was typing something and she’d glanced down to do so. “How are you feeling? Confused? Aggressive?”

“Uh, confused, definitely,” 8XM admitted. “Not… aggressive, so much…” She frowned. “I feel like I’m missing something, but I don’t know what.”

Tourmaline’s eyes flicked up to look at 8XM. “Really.”

“Yeah… is that normal?” 8XM asked.

“No… but it’s interesting,” Tourmaline answered. “You feel a loss.”

“Yeah, a loss,” 8XM agreed, nodding. “That’s it.”

“Very interesting,” Tourmaline mumbled.

The door behind them opened and 8XM started to turn. It was Holly returning, with Jay trailing behind her. Holly gasped and she rushed up behind 8XM in alarm. “What do you think you’re doing?!” she demanding, roughly grabbing 8XM and shoving her out of the chair. “You’re not to touch anything!”

“Oh there you are, Holly!” Tourmaline exclaimed. “I was wondering when you’d return. Isn’t it nice of your quartzes to take your calls for you.”

“What do you want, Tourmaline?” Holly asked.

“Oh, just to chat about 8XM’s progress. But I did get some interesting information from 8XM, herself.”

Holly turned and glared at 8XM, who was lingering behind her, near Jay. “What did you talk about?” she asked.

“I… I was just lonely, that’s all!” 8XM cried, feeling defensive. “It’s so boring and stupid in here!”

“Listen here, you little-”

“Now, now, Holly,” Tourmaline cut in. “She didn’t do any harm. You’re so high strung. Your quartzes will pick up on that.”

“Get out of here, both of you!” Holly snarled, waving her arms at Jay and 8XM. “You shouldn’t even be in here! Get out!”

Jay took a step back, reaching to grab 8XM in front of her. “O-okay…” she said, turning 8XM around and herding her out the door. Once the two of them were gone, Holly sighed. She directed her attention back to Tourmaline, who was wearing a bemused expression.

“You’re out of line, Tourmaline…” Holly muttered.

“Oh goodness, Holly Blue,” Tourmaline giggled. “I’m telling you, it’s fine! It was most helpful.”

“You don’t talk to any of those quartzes without my supervision, you got that?” Holly said. “I report to you, not them.”

“Ugh, fiiine…” Tourmaline sighed. “But it makes you look suspicious.”

“I’m ending this call. You can expect my next report, soon.”

“I look forward to it. And Holly dear? Best not to let your quartzes into your room. It’s a bad look for you.”

Holly cut off Tourmaline’s giggling when she ended the call.

–  
It wasn’t hard to guess at where she’d find Pearl, but Garnet still wasn’t entirely prepared for the sight of her friend, curled up in Amethyst’s hole, blanket wrapped around herself. Pearl’s eyes were closed and she didn’t react to Garnet’s approach. Garnet crouched down in front of the hole, setting one hand above it on the wall and leaning in. “Pearl.”

“Mm.”

“It’s time to go home, now.”

Pearl opened her eyes and she shifted, stretching her cramped body as much as she could in the small space. “It doesn’t feel like it’s home, anymore.”

“Steven’s still there. I’m still there,” Garnet said, firmly. “You have to come back to us, Pearl. We need you, right now.”

Pearl nodded and she allowed Garnet to help her out of the hole. She stood, blanket wrapped around her shoulders, and she looked down, feeling foolish. She couldn’t meet Garnet’s eyes. Or rather, the visor. Pearl put a hand to her head. “I don’t know what to do, anymore. I’m so… tired, Garnet. I’m just tired of feeling this way. About Rose. About Amethyst… I want to be strong for Steven but I can’t bear to have him see me like this… It’s pathetic. I’m pathetic.”

“You’re not,” Garnet answered, her voice soft. “And listen, what I said before… I’m sorry, Pearl. It was wrong of me to say it like that. I’m just…” She sighed. “I’m so frustrated. I’m scared. I miss Amethyst, I miss how things were before. I never saw us losing her, I can’t believe that I never saw it coming.”

“Oh, Garnet…” Pearl whispered. “No, it wasn’t… you don’t see everything, it’s not because of you that Amethyst is gone. It’s no one’s fault. It just happens… sometimes. Right?”

“I just want to lie down and cry and not get up, but I feel like… I can’t. You and Steven can, I don’t mind carrying you, but… I can’t be weak. I have to keep watch, for all of us.” Garnet removed her visor to wipe a tear out of one of her eyes.

“Well…” Pearl began, frowning. “You won’t be alone. You were right. This is war, we can’t curl up and cry every time we’re down a gem. I know that. Amethyst did what any of us would’ve done. She was protecting Steven from that… weapon. Whatever it was.”

Garnet shook her head. “I don’t know what it was, exactly. It wasn’t a destabilizer, I know that much.”

“No, I believe it,” Pearl answered. “I know they wouldn’t come at Steven with a weapon they know couldn’t hurt him.” She sighed. “I hope it wasn’t… too painful when they shattered her. Did you see it, when they did?”

“I never saw her shattered, Pearl,” Garnet replied. “I told you that.”

“But you said you felt her… go.”

“Yes.” Garnet bowed her head. “It was the same feeling as when we were in the war. When our friends were shattered, I felt them go out… their light just died. Their essence. I just felt them… not exist anymore. That’s how it felt to me, when Amethyst went. That she’d been shattered.”

Pearl tried but she couldn’t stop herself from dwelling on it, again. Garnet seemed to know what she was thinking about and she reached out, grasping one of Pearl’s hands in her own. “Pearl, don’t. Don’t think about it… it’s no use to think about how it ended.”

“Y-yes, you’re right…” Pearl agreed, feebly.

The two of them began their slow walk back to the warp pad. Pearl clung to Garnet’s hand and Garnet did nothing to discourage it. Pearl walked with her head down. She held the blanket closed around herself with her other hand. “Garnet, did you know that Amethyst was in love with me?” she asked, softly.

“I never said she-”

“Garnet,” Pearl said, frowning. “You don’t have to protect her, anymore.”

Garnet sighed. “Yes. I’ve known for years.”

“For years?” Pearl asked. “Oh, Amethyst…” She squeezed Garnet’s hand. “Why didn’t she ever tell me?”

“She thought it wouldn’t have made a difference…”

“I suppose that would be true…” Pearl admitted. “All I could ever see was Rose, and then when she left… I didn’t want to feel that way about anyone else, ever again. So I convinced myself that I didn’t.” She breathed in, deeply. “I thought if I couldn’t feel love, then I wouldn’t be hurt again. But I’m still hurting, Garnet… I feel like all I ever do is cry over Rose, and now over Amethyst…” She shook her head.

“There’s only one thing that’s stronger than love, Pearl,” Garnet answered. Pearl glanced at her. “Time.”

“Heh…” Pearl smiled, sadly. “Isn’t that all we seem to have, in the end?”

Garnet nodded.

“I’m sorry I hit you,” Pearl added, after a moment.

“Don’t worry about it too much. I barely felt it,” Garnet smirked. Pearl returned it.

“Well, I wasn’t at my full power, obviously. If I had been, you would still be feeling it!” she said.

“I’d like to see that, one day,” Garnet said.

“Oh!” Pearl gasped. She gave Garnet a playful shove.

As they reached the warp pad, Pearl almost stepped onto it first, but it suddenly activated, causing her to spring back in surprise. A moment later, Steven was standing on the warp pad and he looked just as surprised to see Garnet and Pearl there. “Pearl! Garnet!” he gasped. He rushed for Pearl first, latching his arms around her waist and lifting her off the ground as he hugged her. Pearl patted his back.

“Steven, are you alright?” she asked, worriedly.

Steven put her back down. “Y-yes! I…” He was almost giddy with excitement, almost grinning but trying to fight it. Garnet and Pearl exchanged confused glances. “It’s Amethyst, she’s…” He swallowed and tried to keep himself composed, but he could feel the emotions welling up inside him. He felt like his heart was going to burst. “She’s alive!”

“W-what?!” Pearl sputtered. “H-how? How do you know?!”

“I saw her! I was… I was in her head! I couldn’t hold it for long, she felt so far away but… but she was there, I saw her!” Steven exclaimed.

“Steven, are you absolutely sure about that?” Garnet asked.

“Yeah! It was real!”

Pearl looked at Garnet again, her eyes wide. It didn’t seem real to her. She was shaking. Tears were threatening to spill again. She believed she must’ve cried a river of tears by that point, it seemed like they never seemed to dry up. “H-how can that be…?” she whispered. “Steven, was she… was she okay? How did she look…?”

“She was fine, Pearl! She looked normal. She was… she was wearing a Blue Diamond uniform, but other than that, she was the same. Our Amethyst!” Steven was bouncing around in his excitement and he grasped Pearl’s arm. “Pearl, she’s okay! She’s okay!”

“B-but where is she?” Pearl asked. She was trying very hard not to mirror Steven’s excitement. She wanted to be cautious. She didn’t want to hope too much. But she was trembling.

“I… I couldn’t tell…” Steven admitted, his excitement fading somewhat. “She was in a room, some small room. There was a window… oh! I know she’s in space! She’s on a ship, somewhere! But I couldn’t tell which one… I didn’t know…”

Pearl nodded, numbly.

“But she’s okay, Pearl… She’s alive,” Steven whispered, urgently. Pearl nodded again.

She wanted to believe it so badly. Her legs finally gave way from under her and she fell into a sitting position. Steven hugged her tightly and Pearl let go of the blanket, hugging him back. From her place on the ground, Pearl looked up at Garnet. “Garnet, you… can you sense her at all?”

Garnet looked confused by it all and she shook her head, frowning. “No. It still feels like she’s gone… I… I must’ve made a mistake.”

“It’s okay, Garnet!” Steven assured her. “It’s what I would’ve thought, too.”

But Garnet remained stoic, not celebrating with Pearl and Steven. Pearl noticed her lack of excitement, and she became uneasy again. Her grip on Steven loosened and she got to her feet once more. “It wasn’t a mistake, was it?” Pearl asked, worriedly. “You really did feel her go.”

“But you said it was only like that when a gem was shattered!” Steven protested.

“I felt it one other time…” Garnet admitted. “With Rose. When she…” She trailed off, then started again. “Even though she’d gone, her gem was still here. Maybe Amethyst…”

“What is it, Garnet?” Steven asked, worriedly. “Is Amethyst not okay?”

Garnet put her hand on her mouth and she frowned while looking deep in thought. “That device they used on her…”

“What are you thinking?” Pearl asked.

“Years ago… Sapphire heard a rumor when she was serving Homeworld,” Garnet said, hastily. “It couldn’t be…” She looked to Pearl and Steven. “We have to get home…”

–

Ruby and Sapphire sat on the couch at the beach house, hands clasped together on one side. Ruby kept sending Sapphire worried glances. She rubbed her thumb over Sapphire’s hand as Sapphire tried to speak. Pearl saw it and she had to look away. Steven was sitting next to them on the couch but Pearl was standing. She was too wired to sit down. She couldn’t help but feel impatient with Sapphire. She hadn’t yet revealed what she knew, and Ruby was trying to coax it out of her. Pearl’s mind was racing. Amethyst was alive, but she was different. She was somewhere, but it wasn’t clear if she was in danger. She might’ve been held prisoner, unable to contact them even if she’d wanted to. Pearl wondered if she’d even be able to. When Lapis had contacted them using the Wailing Stone, it was because she knew how to use one, being a gem from Homeworld. Amethyst likely would have no idea how to contact them, if she was able. If only they knew where to find her… but then what?

They were on earth, without a functional ship. Even if Amethyst was as close as the next galaxy over, that was still a long ways from them. Pearl doubted very much that she could jury rig an old Homeworld ship to fly, even with her abilities. Still, if it was the only option, she knew they had to try. As a rebel, Amethyst was considered an enemy to Homeworld, and could be charged with treason. The penalty was death. But Steven had said she was wearing a Blue Diamond uniform, which seemed to imply that she’d been put into service somewhere. What use could Homeworld possibly have for what they’d surely consider a defective and disloyal gem such as Amethyst?

“I’d almost forgotten about it,” Sapphire admitted when she finally spoke, getting Pearl’s attention. “It was years ago, when I was still serving Blue Diamond and Homeworld. And I was only privy to such information because I was considered… a higher gem.” She seemed to cast an apologetic look around the room. Ruby stroked Sapphire’s hand.

“It’s okay, it’s true,” Ruby said.

“I heard from others in Blue Diamond’s court… during the beginning of the rebellion, the casualties on both sides were… numerous,” Sapphire explained. “Even back then, the Diamonds were getting uneasy about what they saw as a waste of perfectly good gem materials. They stopped shattering the prisoners of war and started trying to make use of them in other ways…” She looked to Steven, or at least turned her head in his direction. “You remember the fusion experiments we saw,” Sapphire said.

Steven nodded.

“Homeworld was using gems from the rebellion in their experiments. Fusion experiments, and the Cluster, was one of them… another was to simply harvest the gem materials and create new gems. But it was time consuming and a delicate process. There was a final proposal, something they called Nonresistance. At the time I was working for Homeworld, it was a purely theoretical concept. The idea that a gem could be reset to their original, out-of-the-ground settings. Essentially, doing a complete wipe of all memories, all skills, everything. Starting from scratch. The idea was that problem gems could be reprogrammed, rather than shattered. And it would be of better use.”

“Resetting the gem, and putting them back into service for Homeworld…” Pearl muttered.

“That’s right,” Sapphire said.

Pearl looked disturbed. “It was just an idea, you said?” she asked.

“Yes, but was thousands of years ago,” Sapphire added. “By now, they may have found a way to do it. That weapon… the one they hit Amethyst with…”

Steven and Pearl looked grim. “It reset her…” Pearl finished. Sapphire hung her head but nodded.

“That’s what I believe, yes…”

Steven frowned. “Reset her like a computer… poor Amethyst,” he said, softly.

“It’s no wonder she hasn’t reached out to us, why we felt her disappear…” Pearl said as she began to pace. The emotion was rising in her voice. Her anger, her worry. Anger was better than sorrow. Anger was proactive. She could feel it boiling inside her. What they’d done to Amethyst, it was unforgivable. She wanted someone to pay. She wanted someone to suffer. “They took her… they left her gem, empty. But Amethyst really is gone. She’s really gone… Could she be restored? Would there be a way?”

“It seems unlikely that Homeworld would make it reversible,” Sapphire answered with a frown.

“So she really is… what do we do?” Pearl asked. “Even if we did find a way to get to her, how would we ever convince her to come with us? We’d be strangers to her!”

“Maybe we can’t,” Sapphire answered, sadly.

“No, no that’s not a good enough answer!” Pearl shouted. “You can’t drop a bomb like this on me and then just expect me to be so close, for us to be so close to her, and then just give up! There has to be a way! If… if we have to take her, and teach her again, if we have to…” She covered her face with her hands, completely at a loss.

“It’s too bad gems don’t have a backup,” Steven murmured, sadly. Sapphire and Ruby both looked over at Steven in surprise.

“Backup?” Ruby asked.

“Yeah… like…” Steven sat up, making a gesture of a box. “When my laptop got a bad virus, I had to reset it to the factory settings… But I had, um…” Steven took it off the shelf and held it up. It was a black plastic box, about the size of a deck of cards, with a wire sticking out of it. “It’s an external hard drive. I dumped all my music and stuff on it, I always backed it up every day. And then when the laptop reset, I could just plug it in and I got all my important stuff back! So my computer didn’t really die, I just restored all the old data. I mean, it’s too bad gems don’t have that…”

“They do…” Sapphire gasped, realization dawning on her. Pearl had stopped pacing. “A-at least… Amethyst does…” she clarified. “A few weeks ago when she and Garnet were on a mission to retrieve the Chest of Souls, Amethyst touched it.”

Steven perked up. “What’s the Chest of Souls?” he asked.

“It’s a magical item that creates… a copy of a gem’s essence,” Pearl whispered. She stared at Sapphire and Ruby with wide eyes. “Could we really use that?” She began to wring her hands together. They’d tried before, years ago, as a way to try and reverse corruption. It had only made things worse.

“Amethyst isn’t shattered and she isn’t corrupted,” Sapphire said. “It’s the best shot we’ve got. Amethyst would have to lay her hands on the chest and open it.”

“It would restore her from the last time she backed up her data!” Steven exclaimed, excitedly.

“At most she loses a few weeks of memory,” Ruby said. “From the time she touches the chest, to the time she got reset. But that’s not a big deal.” She looked determined and she stood up on the couch, her hands curled into fists. “We can do it!”

“But the Chest of Souls never worked before…” Pearl said, worriedly. “Whenever we used it before, it only made more trouble for us… Oh, but… we have to try it, don’t we?”

“It’s the only option we have to help Amethyst,” Sapphire answered. “But that still leaves the matter of how we find her, and how we convince her to come with us.”

“If we could get to her, maybe we could just take the chest with us?” Steven suggested.

“No, Steven. It’s too delicate. If we were to drop it or open it and it wasn’t close enough to Amethyst, everything would be ruined,” Sapphire said.

“Then we have to find out where she is, find a way to get her, and find a way to bring her here,” Pearl said, determined. “We need to know where she is, Steven… was there anything you can remember? Any clues?”

Steven thought hard about it. “I was in a room, a blue room. It sort of looked like a bedroom, to me… There was a bed. She was sleeping on a bed. Or like, something like a bed. There was a window… It was on a ship, I know that. The door didn’t work when I tried to punch in a code. It couldn’t be opened. Hmm… there was a mirror. There were items…”

“What sorts of items?” Pearl pressed.

“One looked like a wizard’s staff, or something. There was a bust of someone who looked like Blue Diamond. Umm… there were some weapons on the wall.”

“Well we can at least determine that Amethyst is in the service of Blue Diamond,” Pearl mumbled.

“Oh! Wait… there were… there were pictures!” Steven exclaimed, suddenly as his memory came to him. “On the wall! Of that gem… at the human zoo. Holly Blue Agate!”

“You’re sure, Steven?” Ruby asked.

“Totally sure! Do you think that’s where she is? At the human zoo?”

“That seems a logical place to put her…” Pearl mused. “If she’s being put to work, it makes sense that they’d put her there with the other earth Amethysts.”

“But she’s met them,” Ruby pointed out. “Don’t you think even one of them would be like ‘Whoa, it’s that gem from earth!’ and tell her who she was?”

“We can’t assume the Amethysts at the human zoo are our allies,” Pearl answered, frowning. “Even if they were helpful to us before, they’re still gems working for the Diamonds. We can’t put any faith in them.”

“Even if they did tell her, they don’t know much about us or how to contact us,” Sapphire added. “And what reason would Amethyst have to try?”

“How can we get up there?” Steven asked. “If she’s at the human zoo, that’s so far away, isn’t it?”

Again a silence fell over the small group. Pearl started pacing again. She was almost shaking with the renewed energy that was flowing through her. She was excited. They were getting so close. There had to be a way, if they only put their heads together. “We’ve tried it before, we’ve never gotten one of those old ships airborne… at least not for long. And I doubt we’re going to find the tech on earth needed to build one. Ugh, we’re earthbound.” She sighed in frustration.

“There are ships at the human zoo,” Sapphire said. “If we could get Amethyst to come to us, she could hijack one.”

“No, absolutely not!” Pearl gasped. “We can’t ask her to do anything that’s going to put her at risk!”

“Could we call the human zoo, somehow?” Steven questioned. “Like, using the wailing stone?”

“It would give away our location,” Sapphire said.

“They already have it,” Pearl answered. “Homeworld already knows we’re here. We lose nothing by trying to contact her.”

“But do we lose her?” Steven cut in. “If we contact her and they find out… what happens to Amethyst?”

The thought of losing Amethyst a second time was distressing to Pearl. She put her hands to her mouth. For the moment, Amethyst was safe, she was alive, and they had a shred of hope, no matter how small it felt to them. She was terrified of risking Amethyst’s life for any reason, now. But she knew someone had to risk something. She couldn’t abandon Amethyst at the Human Zoo, no matter how difficult it would be to get to her. The thought of knowingly leaving her there was too much for her to take, somehow worse than her being dead. Knowing she was so close, so within her reach, and yet not nearly close enough. Pearl knew they had to do something and figure out a way to get in contact with Amethyst. Or someone who could deliver a message to Amethyst. It was the only way she could see any light at the end of the tunnel. Pearl had made up her mind.

“We have to contact Amethyst,” Pearl said, firmly. “We have to confirm without a doubt that she’s being held at the Human Zoo. Steven…” she turned to him. “Before we rouse any suspicion, we should try to get in touch with her through you. You’ve still got a connection with her, even over all that distance.”

“I can try…” Steven said, nodding. “I found her without even meaning to. Maybe if I actually tried to get into her head, it would be easier.” He frowned. “I hope she’ll forgive me for doing that. I can’t really ask permission.”

“She’ll be fine, Steven,” Pearl answered. “We can’t worry about being polite right now.”

“Right…” Steven agreed.

–

In their room, the zoo gems were having a rather heated discussion among themselves. All talking at once, it was difficult to make out any clear threads of dialogue. But the tone was clear. As Jay entered the room with 8XM in tow, the group began to quiet down. Holly Blue lingered in the doorway, leaning with her arms crossed and scowling. Ready to stop any gem that got out of line or talked out of turn. A part of her was hoping someone would, just so she’d have an excuse to get violent with someone. Jay and 8XM’s behavior towards her had left a bad taste in her mouth, and she was again reminded of why her supervisors in the beginning had always warned her about “going soft” on her charges. Because then they no longer listened to or respected her. Well, she wasn’t sure if any of them had an ounce of respect for anyone or anything. But they at least could fall into line when she needed them to. She knew she couldn’t allow the leniency with 8XJ to go on. They were certainly not friends, despite what the gem had said to her. She couldn’t believe she’d allowed it to get so far. For the moment though, she put her thoughts aside to focus on how the group received 8XM. They all knew her, and Holly knew as long as she was in the room with them, they’d pretend they didn’t know her.

But as soon as they were alone, that was where 8XJ came in. It was 8XJ who had to convince them to keep up the secret even when Holly wasn’t there to enforce things. She’d hoped 8XJ had made a compelling enough argument. The last thing she wanted was for everything to start falling apart. 8XM was of no concern to her, beyond what she meant for their zoo.

Jay seemed on edge, as well. Holly certainly asked a lot of her. And in turn, she was asking a lot of her fellow gems. They regarded her and 8XM with conflicted expressions. Jay couldn’t guarantee anyone would keep it a secret for long. Her best guess was that they had a few days at most before someone blabbed to 8XM about who she really was. Jay would have to keep an eye on things. Perhaps she’d have Holly assign them together for tasks. If it wasn’t for Homeworld’s involvement, 8XJ would’ve said to hell with it and told 8XM everything. But the menacing shadow of Homeworld was hanging over all of them. 8XM’s safety was priority to Jay, above anything else. All the quartzes were her family and friends. Her first order of business was to protect them, every single day. Before anything else, she would do whatever it took to keep her friends safe. Even if it meant lying to them. 8XM was better deceived then dead, as far as she was concerned. But her conscience was still bothering her, telling her it was the wrong thing to do.

8XM regarded the other quartzes in awe. She hadn’t expected there to be so many of them. At first, no one approached her. They all seemed guarded with her. 8XM’s smile began to fade. She wondered what she’d done wrong. How she could’ve offended them already when she hadn’t even spoken, yet. Maybe that was the problem; she hadn’t said anything. Maybe she seemed unfriendly for not saying hi. “Uh, hi!” she greeted them.

A few nervous looks were exchanged between the group but finally one of them stepped forward. “Hi, 8XM!” It was Carnelian, the only gem who was almost as small as 8XM, herself. “It’s good to meetcha! Ooh you’re short, like me!” She grinned and came in to give 8XM a hug. “Welcome to the family!” She lifted 8XM off her feet for a moment before she set her back down. 8XM grinned.

“You’re Carnelian?” she asked.

“Sure am! Does my reputation precede me?”

“Yeah! Well, wait, not like in a bad way or anything,” 8XM added.

“She does have a bad reputation, though,” Skinny Jasper said from the back. She sauntered up to 8XM and Carnelian. “Jasper Facet-9, Cut-7XF. Buuut everyone just calls me Skinny. Because obviously.” She did a turn around.

“Tall and skinny,” 8XM murmured, staring up at her.

As soon as Carnelian and Skinny had made their introductions, the other gems began to do so as well. 8XJ stood back, observing the interactions with a smile on her face. Gems were lifting 8XM, hugging her, touselling her hair, and 8XM was enjoying every minute of it. She wasn’t uneasy or shy with them at all. Within a few minutes, they were all laughing together, wrestling and teasing. It was like she’d always been there, accepted easily into their group where she seamlessly fit. 8XJ reminded herself that 8XM did belong with them, that she was meant to be with them, always. They were all made together, all from the same Kindergartens, the same planet. Of course she felt like family. She was family. Her unease had faded, somewhat. If 8XM couldn’t be on earth with the Crystal Gems, the next best thing for her was to be there. Perhaps it was even a better thing, in the long run.

“Alright, that’s enough now!” Holly commanded, stepping into the room and clapping her hands together. “Back to work, everyone! Get into your places!”

The gems scattered, leaving 8XM alone. 8XJ put a hand on her shoulder. “You’ll stick with me, for now,” she said to 8XM. 8XM grinned up at her. “I’ll show her the ropes around here, Holly.”

Holly scowled. “See that you do,” she answered. “And don’t let your productivity suffer.”

“Yes, Holly Blue Agate!” 8XJ said, performing the diamond salute. She glanced down at 8XM and nudged her. 8XM performed the salute as well. Holly squinted at the pair of them. She leaned in close to Jay, close enough to whisper to her.

“You keep an eye on her. Report any unusual behavior to me, immediately.”

8XJ nodded.

The pair of them left the room and 8XM bounded in front of 8XJ, excitedly. “Everyone was so nice! I was kinda worried at first but like, then everyone sort of came around. Did you see that?”

“I saw!” Jay answered with a grin. “You fit right in. No surprise. You’re one of us.”

“Yeah, I guess I am…” 8XM agreed with a shy smile. “Jay, I’m really sorry I didn’t listen to you… ugh…” She sighed and pressed her hand against her forehead, pushing up her bangs. “I can’t believe I did that. I just got like… so freaked out, and I don’t really know why. It felt like someone was in the room with me but then they disappeared and I just felt so abandoned… you know? No, never mind. That sounds so stupid, right? Heh.”

Jay gave her an odd look. “Someone was in the room with you?”

“Kind of… that’s how it felt, anyways. I don’t know who it was, though. There was no one there but me.”  
Jay raised an eyebrow. Something worth reporting to Holly? Possibly. Anything odd was considered fair game for her reports. But she felt a twinge of guilt over the fact that she was essentially studying 8XM like a laboratory experiment. To Homeworld, that was probably exactly what she was. “That’s weird… but I guess sometimes I get weird feelings, too,” Jay said after a pause. “Okay, peewee, let’s get you acquainted with everything around here… I’ll give you the tour.”

Jay began taking 8XM around the zoo. They ran into many of the other quartzes during their rounds, who all seemed eager to show off what they could do with someone new to impress. 8XM did seem impressed with it all. But she seemed especially interested in the humans themselves, who they observed through glass. 8XM pressed her face against the glass, watching with wide-eyed curiosity. The humans couldn’t see them from where they were observing; that was the point. Jay stood behind her for a few moments, just letting her take it all in. Then she cleared her throat. “I guess I don’t have to tell you this, but we’re at the human zoo. These guys are descendants of humans Pink Diamond got from earth, thousands of years ago. Since Pink Diamond’s death, Blue Diamond has been the one overseeing this circus. Come, I’ll show you more…”

8XM reluctantly followed Jay down the hall, although she really wanted to watch the humans for a while longer. She was fascinated by them. Jay led her into a computer room where she went to the panel and began to type on it. “So, we monitor the humans on these screens. And each human has a profile in the system…” Jay clicked through a few of them. They all had their names, photos and age listed, along with relations in the group and medical histories. “We’ve also got a few generations back, records of humans who died. Just to keep things running smoothly.” 8XM made grabby hands for the keypad and Jay stepped back and let her try it. “Just use your finger to swipe through. Yeah! Like that!”

8XM swiped through a few photos and then she landed on one that she paused on. Jay’s back was turned from the screen as she explained something else but 8XM didn’t hear her. She was staring, squinting at the photo. She tilted her head to one side, confused. “Hey, who’s this…?” she finally asked.

Jay turned and realized 8XM was staring at a photo of Steven, one of the humans from earth. Jay’s first thought was to close the profile and hurriedly distract 8XM with something else. But she hesitated, feeling curious. She stood next to her. “That’s one of the humans we got recently, from earth…” Jay said. “Officially, we listed him as deceased but… he actually got away.”

“Oh…” 8XM said. “Hm.”

“What is it about this one that made you stop?” Jay inquired.

8XM looked on a moment longer, then shook her head, swiping out of the profile. “I don’t know. Nothing, I guess.”

“Having a weird feeling, again?”

“Maybe…”

“Can you let me know if you get any more weird feelings?” Jay asked.

“Uh, sure…? But why?”

“I just want to make sure everything’s going alright with you,” Jay answered, somewhat truthfully. “You know, make sure you’re fitting in and all that.”

“Right. Okay,” 8XM said with a nod and a grin. “Sure!” She chuckled. “Geez, you and Tourmaline both are really worried about how I’m feeling. I guess I should be flattered!”

The tour continued on without further incident. 8XM seemed naturally curious about everything around her, and asked a lot of questions. Jay found it oddly satisfying to rattle off what she knew about everything and show off her knowledge. It was too bad they almost never got visitors at the zoo. She felt like she’d make a great tour guide. They eventually got to work, with Jay tasked with fixing the water filtration system that had clogged up. They entered a space under the main part of the zoo, where they could work undetected by the humans. 8XM was essentially tasked as Jay’s helper.  
Under the zoo, they were standing in water that came up to Jay’s calves. 8XM was up to her waist. Jay began searching for the plug, while 8XM used her gem as a light for her.  
“This is getting stupid,” Jay grumbled. “This one always gets backed up. I keep telling Holly, the piping is all calcified but she doesn’t care. This is just a bandaid solution at best.”  
“How would you fix it for good?” 8XM inquired.  
“At this point… probably gutting the whole filtration system and installing it all new. Holly would never go for it, though. This zoo is thousands of years old and it’s starting to show.”

“Why wouldn’t she go for it?” 8XM questioned.

“Uhh… she doesn’t like to draw too much attention to us, I guess,” Jay answered with a shrug.  
“Do you like Holly?”  
“Hmm… that’s an interesting question.” Jay loosened the wrong pipe and a spray of water began hitting her in the face. “Gah!” She ignored 8XM’s laughter behind her and she hurriedly turned off the water, giving her head a shake. She grinned at 8XM, who tried to cover her mouth to stifle her giggles. “You jerk!” Jay laughed.

“I’m sorry!”

“But to answer your question… Holly’s our Agate. If any of us liked her, she wouldn’t be doing her job very well. She told me once… it really kind of put things into perspective for me. ‘It’s nothing personal’. Heh. Isn’t that the truth. Homeworld stuff, summed up.”

“What do you mean?” 8XM asked.

“Well…” Jay grunted as she tightened a bolt. “It’s like uh… you weren’t there, but in the war we were all on earth, fighting the rebels. And I mean, I can’t speak for everyone here, but like me personally, I wasn’t really worried about it. I mean, I wasn’t upset that they were the enemy. It’s not like I ever met Pink Diamond. When I heard she’d been shattered, I didn’t really feel anything.”

“Oh…” 8XM frowned. “I guess I feel the same way, yeah… I mean when I woke up, I guess I knew Pink Diamond was my diamond, but like I don’t really care about her. Heh. Or Blue Diamond. Does she feel like your diamond, now?”

“Pfst. Blue Diamond doesn’t care about any of us. Holly loves her, though. I guess because Holly was actually made for her. The rest of us weren’t.”

“Where did you guys find me?” 8XM asked, suddenly. “The first thing I remember is squeezing your hand. But I must’ve been doing something before that, right?”

“Uh… someone from Homeworld found you wandering around the Kindergarten,” Jay answered, hastily. “I don’t know anything else.”

“Oh… I don’t remeber that at all. I just remember…” 8XM looked thoughtful. “No, that’s not true… I remember one thing.”

Jay waited, curious.

“Go on,” she urged when 8XM fell silent.

8XM shook her head. “The more I think about it, the further away it goes. I don’t know what it is… like a light. But it went out. And I just felt… like something was leaving me. Something important. And I was trying to stop it, but I couldn’t…” Her expression had become confused and troubled. “I feel like I’m not whole. Isn’t that weird…?”

Jay gave 8XM a concerned look. She could see how much 8XM was struggling to come to terms with what had happened to her. It hadn’t been such a perfect process, after all. She didn’t think gems were supposed to have a sense that their memories had been tampered with. That seemed like something Homeworld wouldn’t want to happen. “It’s not so weird…” Jay answered after a pause. She went back to focusing on what she was fixing and took her eyes off 8XM. “You won’t feel that way forever. Once you’re here with us for a while, you’ll feel normal. It’s not so bad, here. I mean… it’s just a job.”

“Yeah, I guess that’s true,” 8XM answered. “I dunno what else I’d be doing if I wasn’t here.”

“Who knows? I’m glad they put you with us.”

8XM smiled. “Yeah? Me too.”

“I really did want to come back and find you, all those years ago…” Jay admitted. “You weren’t out of the ground yet. We waited for you as long as we could, but eventually the war called us away. I wanted to come back and see if you ever came out, but I could never get back to the Kindergarten. It was all just a whirlwind…”

“Aw, you actually were worried about me?”

“Yeah. Eventually all the gems were evacuated from the planet. I almost went back then. But I didn’t. I couldn’t…”

“Hey, don’t worry about it…” 8XM said, surprised by how solemn Jay had gotten. “I wasn’t even out, yet, right?”

“But still… you came out and you were alone,” Jay answered. She tried to imagine herself emerging from her hole in the Kindergarten, everything empty and still. No other gems around. It made her shudder. The crushing loneliness, the isolation. It must have been overwhelming to deal with, at times.

“It’s not like I remember it,” 8XM answered. “I was just wandering around there, like you said, right? I guess I wasn’t awake or something. It’s weird that I can’t remember… but it sounds like there wasn’t much going on, anyways. Maybe it’s better that I can’t.”

“Yeah, maybe…” Jay agreed. “Then it’s not so painful.”

“Yeah, totally! Like, who cares what I was doing before?” 8XM said. “I’m here, now. Everything else doesn’t matter. I’m glad I’m here! I like all of you. I really like you, Jay. I feel like I already met you, I mean… it feels like I’ve always kinda been here.”

“Well, you belong here.”

“Yeah, I do…”

Jay eventually managed to fix the plug, which wasn’t exactly a glamorous job and it sent 8XM snickering again until Jay said “Next time I’ll just send you crawling through the pipes!” That stopped her giggling.

Eventually they returned to the room for quiet hours, which Jay explained to 8XM. “It’s when the humans go to sleep. We usually rest up while they’re doing that, unless there’s something major going on. Now I thiiink they shoulda made you a cubbie by now but I guess if it’s not there, you can just use mine.”

They entered the room, where some of the quartzes were already lingering, chatting and laughing together.

“Jaaaay, someone told me you guys were in Holly’s room,” one of the Amethysts called to Jay in a sing-songy voice. Jay blushed.

“Whatever,” Jay answered. That sent some of them laughing.

“Oh 8XJ, when you’re done unclogging the pipes in the zoo, maybe you could come and unclog something else in my room?” one of them said, trying to mimic Holly’s voice. The group snickered.

“Oh, here’s your hole,” Jay said, finding it at the bottom, near the floor. “Hang on, I gotta go throw it down.” Jay left 8XM standing in front of her hole and she rushed at one of the Amethyst’s and tackled her down. 8XM watched, laughing at their roughhousing. She went into the hole and sat inside, just to try it out. It was her size. It had an artificial feeling to her, but it wasn’t bad. It was nice and cozy. She felt oddly happy to sit inside it. And then she felt tired, again. It had snuck up on her so suddenly, it was only the moment she was still, when she finally took notice.

8XM leaned against the wall, stifling a yawn. Well, it was quiet hours. She could sleep if she wanted to. She’d seen other gems doing it in their cubbies, so it must’ve been okay. She thought it was odd that she was actually sleepy when she wasn’t supposed to need sleep to recharge herself. Then again, she’d been using a lot of mental energy just taking in all the new sights and adjusting to things.

8XM let her eyes close and almost immediately, sleep overtook her. When Jay returned to her cubbie and poked her head in, she could see 8XM was asleep. “Oh… geez, she’s so tired.”

“Jay, what are we doing?” a voice asked from behind her. Jay turned, looking into the concerned eyes of Amethyst 8XL. “We shouldn’t be lying to her…”

“Keep your voice down!” Jay hissed. She dragged 8XL away from 8XM’s hole, just in case she woke up. “Just leave it alone, okay?”

“We helped 8XM before, we should help her again,” 8XL insisted. “What changed?”

“Homeworld is watching us like a red eye,” Jay answered. “I told you that.”

“But her friends on earth…” XL protested.

“She wouldn’t know them even if she saw them,” Jay said. Even as she said it though, she didn’t really know if it was true. 8XM had lingered on the photo of Steven and she seemed to know to some extent, that she’d had her memories wiped. Perhaps they hadn’t really erased her, at least not as much as they’d meant to.

“We should still-”

“El,” Jay said. Her voice was firm but her eyes were pleading.

XL sighed but relented. “Okay, fine. But you know someone’s gonna tell her. I can think of at least 5 gems off the top of my head that have very big mouths.”

Jay cast a glance back at 8XM’s cubbie. “Keep an eye on her for me, will you? I gotta go talk to Holly.”

“Uh, okay… about what?” XL stood aside as Jay passed her.

“Don’t worry about it.”

–

Steven had tried a few times to reach Amethyst again, as he had before. It had been a frustrating experience, knowing the others were counting on him to make contact with her, and he wasn’t able to. He could see how hopeful Pearl was, in particular. How disappointed she was when he couldn’t. “Don’t worry about it, Steven…” she’d said, sadly. “We’ll find another way.”

“I’ll keep trying,” Steven insisted.

It was hard not to be restless in his bed that night. He’d gone to his bedroom, saying he was tired. But the truth was, he wanted to keep trying to get in touch with Amethyst without the distraction of the gems sitting around him. He appreciated their support, but they were putting pressure on him just by being there. He needed time alone, to focus. Steven hoped that he’d be able to get that.

Steven rolled onto his side. He could hear faint murmurs of discussion happening in the kitchen. Pearl and Garnet. They were keeping their voices low, and Steven couldn’t make out their words. He rolled over again, to face away from them. He pulled the blankets over his head, trying to block out all light and really let himself drift away. Amethyst was counting on him. He had to try and find a way to get to her. He tried to picture her in his mind’s eye. Thinking about Amethyst made his throat tighten and his sinuses feel peppery. He closed his eyes tighter. He missed her so much. He was so worried about her. She’d taken a hit for him. Maybe she still would’ve been erased, but if he’d grabbed her gem in that moment, they could’ve restored her once they’d figured out what had happened. They would’ve eventually. Steven was sure of that.

Why did she have to be so far away? Why did it have to be so complicated?

Steven slowly faded out of consciousness, drifting into something like a deep sleep. In the darkness, he saw Amethyst. He called to her as he drifted closer to where she was. She turned in confusion.

“It’s you, again…” Amethyst said, softly. And then Steven rushed closer to Amethyst and she faded away.

With a start, Steven opened his eyes. He was sitting inside a cramped space made of white material. In front of him was the opening. He took a moment to get his bearings. He was sitting inside something. He looked down at himself. He was Amethyst, again. He’d done it! He couldn’t believe it. “I-I’m Amethyst again!” he exclaimed, excitedly. He scooted to the edge of the hole and popped his head out. Around him were other quartzes, and there was no doubt he was in the human zoo. He’d been inside this room before and he recognized it instantly. Steven heaved himself out of the hole and got to his feet, staring all around himself. Sitting nearby was one of the Amethysts. Steven recognized her, but he didn’t remember her name. She was looking at him.

“Oh hey, you’re awake,” she said. “You okay?”

“Y-yeah!” Steven stammered. “I’m just… yeah, I’m fine!”

The other Amethyst gave him an odd look and Steven began snapping his fingers. “I’m sorry, I really don’t remember your name…” he admitted, wincing.

“Heh, that’s fine. It’s 8XL. Or just El, if that’s easier.” She got to her feet, regarding him with concern. “Are you sure you’re okay? Jay asked me to watch you…”

Steven suddenly grasped 8XL’s hand, yanking her down towards himself. “I need to go somewhere private!” he whispered to her. “And I need a pen or something to write with. Do you know where I can find those things??”

“Er… I don’t know if Jay’s gonna want you wandering around by yourself,” El said, uncomfortably.

“That’s okay, because you’ll be with me!” Steven exclaimed. “Right? You’ll help me? Please?”

“I, uh… okay…”

The two of them left the room but El stopped Steven from walking, checking the hallways first like she was crossing a busy street. When it seemed clear, she led him along behind her. “What’s going on, 8XM?” she asked him as they walked. “I can’t believe I’m taking you anywhere… Jay’s gonna be mad. Holly, too. Ugh.”

“It’s okay, I’ll tell them it was my idea!” Steven assured her.

“I don’t know if that’ll really help…” El sighed. She came to a room and checked around again before they slipped inside. She closed the door behind them and turned on the lights. It appeared to be a board room of some description. There were many chairs around a large table. Some of the chairs were smaller and larger than was standard, presumably to accommodate gems of different sizes. Steven spun around in a circle, taking it all in. “Here…” El said, placing her hand on a pad on the table. The hologram screens flickered on and the lights dimmed automatically. She handed Steven a stylus. “Just write, I guess. What are we writing, now?”

“8XL, are we friends?” Steven asked, giving her a wide-eyed look of intensity.

“U-um… I mean, sure! I think so?”

“You’re gonna help me, right?” Steven continued.

“Help you with what?”

“I need to go back to earth…”

El blinked a few times. “Back to earth… why?”

“Because I… I miss my friends, there!” Steven exclaimed. He began furiously writing on the holo screen. El hovered nervously behind him, trying to see what he was writing. It appeared to be some kind of message but her understanding of human writing was fairly limited.

“You miss your friends? I thought you couldn’t remember them!” El gasped. “Oh shit, wait… ah… forget I said that…”

“You helped me before, I remember that…” Steven said as he wrote. “I can trust you, right?”

El looked uncertain but then she nodded. “Yeah…” She looked more determined. “Hell yeah, you can! This whole plan is stupid! I’ll help you, 8XM.”

“I’m not 8XM,” Steven said, hastily. “I’m Steven. Steven Universe… I’m just uh… borrowing her body for a bit.”

“Wha?!” El gasped.

“Just trust me. She’s not gonna know what anything is when I leave her body,” Steven explained. “You have to tell her. You have to make sure she sees this message.” He stood back from it.

“Read it to me…” El said.

“It says, 'Amethyst, this is Steven writing for you. You probably don’t remember who I am, but I’m one of the Crystal Gems back on Earth. You’re one of us. We think Homeworld wiped out your memory, that’s why you don’t know who I am. But we’re going to get it back. You have to trust us. You have to find a way to get back to earth. 8XL is going to help you. Please believe me, I promise this isn’t a lie. We miss you. Please come home.’”

El was laughing, nervously. “I didn’t know the Crystal Gems could just hop into someone else’s body…” she said. “This is real? This isn’t a joke?”

“I swear it’s not,” Steven insisted. “You have to believe me, 8XL!”

“Fine, I believe you. I mean, it sounds insane but everything’s pretty crazy around here right now, so so okay. I believe it. And I’ll try to help.”

Steven broke into a wide, relieved smile. “Thanks… Thank you. We really miss her, back home…”

As with before, Steven felt himself suddenly being vacated from Amethyst’s body and he stumbled, feeling dizzy. “A-ah, I’m going now… please make sure to help her…” he pleaded one last time. Then everything went dark.


	9. Touch

8XM stumbled backwards and nearly fell over but El reacted, putting her hands out to catch her and steady her. 8XM wobbled, but started to come to, her eyelids fluttering. “Uhhh… what’s going on…?” she groaned. She turned her head to look at 8XL. “What happened?”

“You don’t remember?” El asked. 

“No…” 8XM said. “Was I sleepwalking again?” She started taking in her surroundings. They were somewhere she’d never been, although she was getting used to that feeling. Her eyes settled on the message scrawled out on the holo screen. 8XM slowly moved out of El’s arms and stood straight, looking over the message. El stood quietly by, unsure if she needed to say anything right then or not. After a long moment, 8XM turned to look at El. She was smiling, but there was an easiness in it. “Heh. What is this?” she asked, nervously. 

“You wrote it. Or, well…” Even El wasn’t sure if she could adequately explain what had happened. It certainly didn’t make a lot of sense to her. “Someone hijacked your body for a while. Heh… it wasn’t a joke, right?”

“What? No…” 8XM shook her head. “You didn’t write this, XL?” 

“I swear I didn’t!” she insisted. “I don’t even know how to write in that language! You can read it?”

“Y-yeah…” 8XM took a few steps away from the holo screen, and then fell into a sitting position on the floor, her legs out in front of her. “Okay… heh… wow. Um…” 

“Are you alright?” El asked, nervously.

“Steven…” 8XM said in a quiet voice. “Yeah, that’s who it is. The one who I saw in my head. And before… that was him, too. That little human kid.” She sat up a bit straighter as realization dawned on her. “That’s where I recognized his picture from!” She turned to look at El, her eyes wide. “He was here, like actually here! He’s the one who escaped the zoo!”

“Yeah…” El admitted. “You were here, too.” 

“I was?” 8XM asked, stunned. 

El squirmed, awkwardly. “I’m not supposed to talk about this…” 

“What?!” 8XM got to her feet again. “Talk about what? Tell me what happened! Did I really get my memory wiped, XL?” She turned away from her, holding a hand to her forehead as she thought over some things. “That’s why I’ve been feeling so weird and lost! My body knows I forgot something! Did you know about this?!” 

“We weren’t supposed to tell you, 8XM!” El tried to explain, desperately. 

“What do you mean?!” 8XM cried. “Does everyone know?!” 

“We wanted to tell you but we couldn’t! I… I don’t know all the details, but…” 

8XM fisted her hands into her hair, staring at the floor. “You guys lied to me…?” she squeaked in disbelief.

“N-no! We weren’t lying, we…” 

“What’s going on in here?” Holly’s voice cut in. She was suddenly looming in the doorway, and both Amethysts turned to look at her. XL looked anxious but 8XM could only feel angered. She grit her teeth, glaring daggers at Holly. She abruptly took her whips out and cracked them hard on the floor, causing the other two gems to take a step back. 8XM was shaking with rage. Her hateful gaze was locked on Holly. She was trembling. “You made me forget?” she asked, accusingly. 

Holly scowled and she shot a look at 8XL. “What did you tell her?” she demanded. 

“I swear, it wasn’t me!” El exclaimed, holding her hands up. 

“Get back to your room, 8XL,” Holly said in a low voice. 8XL hesitated, casting another glance at 8XM. “NOW!” Holly barked. 8XL hurried out of the room. Holly directed her attention back on 8XM, her expression guarded. “You’d better think hard about what you’re planning to do, 8XM,” Holly said, coolly. She stepped into the room and pressed the button on the conference table, clearing the holo screens of their writing. “Drawing your weapon on your Agate is a serious offense.” 

“I don’t CARE!” 8XM shouted. She lunged for Holly, crossing the room swiftly. Holly reached behind her, taking out her own whip. 8XM dodged Holly’s first attack, getting in close to her. But Holly had another weapon at close range. As 8XM jumped up, Holly suddenly jabbed her with a gem destabilizer, which stopped her in midair. The shock traveled through 8XM’s body and several jagged cracks formed over her before she broke apart, poofing up in smoke. Holly caught her gem before it hit the floor and she gripped it in her hand. That had been incredibly easy. Holly supposed 8XM had also lost any memories of her combat experience, and thus she’d made the mistake of leaving herself open. 

Some of the quartzes had come out into the hallway to investigate the sounds of the scuffle. Holly emerged from the room with 8XM’s gem. She gave them a brief glance, her eyes hard. Then she headed in the opposite direction, calmly walking down the hallway. No one followed her. 

Holly strode into the containment wing, tossing 8XM’s gem into a cell and putting up the force field. She stood back and waited. Within a few moments, 8XM had reformed herself and she was kneeling on the floor of the cell, staring through her hair at Holly. “Trust me, 8XM, this is the last thing I’d be doing if I had the choice.” Holly sighed, wistfully. “Buuut… I was made for this, and I won’t pretend I don’t enjoy it.” She smirked. 

8XM remained on the floor of the cell. She looked away from Holly. “Every gem has her place,” Holly continued, stepping closer to the force field. “And you should be honored that Homeworld saw fit to give you a second chance. But whatever 8XL told you, whatever you think you know, it would be best to forget it. Hallucinations are a symptom of Nonresistance, after all.”

“Why did you do this to me?” 8XM asked, brokenly. 

Holly laughed. “I have neither the ability nor the inclination to wipe your memory. It was Homeworld, entirely.”

8XM felt a shuddering sob pass through her lips. She hung her head, trying to suppress it. She dug her fingers uselessly into the floor of the cell. Holly watched, unmoved. “Let me go back to earth…” 8XM pleaded.

“I’m afraid I can’t do that,” Holly answered, coldly. “But I can be merciful. In my next report, I’ll advise that you be shattered, as you pose a danger to yourself and your fellow gems. And hopefully this ridiculous Nonresistance business will die with you.” Holly stepped back from the cell. She turned and walked off, leaving 8XM alone. As a precaution, she brought barriers down around the wing 8XM was being held in, to keep the other quartzes from trying to find her. 

Only when she was entirely alone, did 8XM drop down into a lying position on the floor. Earth was only a planet she was vaguely familiar with. Her knowledge of it came from the other quartzes, and whatever base information she had with her as an Amethyst. She knew nothing of the planet from personal experience. She had no connection to it beyond knowing she’d been made there. She closed her eyes, picturing Steven. She’d seen him in her mind, as vague as a dream she’d forgotten. She’d felt him leave her twice. If he’d really hijacked her body to communicate with her, that meant she wasn’t meant to be at the zoo, after all. 

8XM didn’t know what the Crystal Gems were. She wracked her limited memories, trying to find the information she was searching for. But she came up with nothing. Angry at herself, 8XM pressed her hands against her head and squeezed her body into a ball. “Remember…” she whispered through her tightly clenched jaw. “Something… anything…” Still, nothing came to her. Her first memory was clear. She’d been in the room with Jay and Holly, being led off the platform. There was nothing else, no matter how hard she tried. 8XM didn’t know who to trust, anymore. Moreover, she wasn’t certain she could trust herself. Were there really people missing her on earth, or had that all been a hallucination, as Holly had said? She knew she was missing something, but she didn’t know what. All she felt was that emptiness inside her. It had become more pronounced, not something vaguely in the back of her mind, but front and center. Would she find answers on earth? Or would she run into another dead end? 

Steven, if he was indeed real, had said they could “get back” her memories. If that happened, would she feel complete? Or was it a lie? 8XM didn’t know. Even if she wanted to go to earth, she couldn’t get out of the cell by herself. She didn’t know where earth was, either. Would Steven and the Crystal Gems come for her?

–

Steven shot up in bed so fast, he displaced his quilt. He gasped loudly, like he was trying to take in air after being smothered. It was somewhat true. He’d been under the covers. There was a sheen of sweat on his face. He took several deep breaths, putting a hand to his chest. Once he’d recovered, he thought back to what he’d experienced. There was no doubt in his mind that Amethyst was at the Human Zoo. What was more, she had at least one ally to help her escape. But he wasn’t able to see how Amethyst had reacted when she’d come to. He couldn’t be sure if she’d believe him or even want to find them. If she was truly missing all of her memories of them, then he knew he was essentially asking her to leave her Amethyst family and come to them, complete strangers. If she had her memories, of course she would come home in a heartbeat, as soon as she was able. But without them, she had no attachment to any of them. It was a gamble, and Steven knew it. They also hadn’t been able to communicate with her, directly. Her thoughts on the situation were unknown to him.

Still, there was some hope. Steven tried to focus on his hope rather than his reservations. He got out of bed and hurried down the stairs. Pearl and Garnet were still in the kitchen, still talking in hushed voices. When Steven burst in, they both turned to look at him. “I got in, again!” Steven exclaimed, breathlessly. “She’s at the Human Zoo, for sure!”

“You were able to get into her body?” Pearl asked. 

“Yeah! I couldn’t hold it but… she needed to know for herself. I wrote her a note!” Steven explained, hastily. “I… I didn’t know what else to do. I mean, to deliver the message to her.” 

“No, Steven. You did well,” Garnet assured him with a smile. 

“Was she alone?” Pearl inquired, nervously. 

“Ah, no… I had to get another gem to help me.” 

“Steven!” Pearl gasped. “You know we can’t trust those gems!”

“But I think we can… we have to!” Steven insisted, furrowing his brows. “Amethyst can’t escape on her own, there’s no way. And she wouldn’t even know how to get to earth! We need to trust those gems, you guys. They helped us escape, remember? They’re on our side!”

Pearl and Garnet glanced at each other. Pearl seemed to relent. “I guess that’s true,” she agreed. “We have no choice…” 

“I still haven’t been able to see Amethyst in my future vision at all,” Garnet muttered. She leaned against the counter, frowning to herself. She glanced up at the picture hanging prominently on the wall above the front door. “She still just feels like how Rose feels to me. Just gone.” 

“But this is all good news, isn’t it?” Pearl asked. She finally allowed herself a wary smile as she clasped her hands together. “Amethyst will certainly get the message and come right back!”

“If she’s able,” Garnet said, somewhat dejectedly. “And if she wants to.”

Pearl frowned. “Why wouldn’t she want to?” she asked. “She belongs with us. She’s a Crystal Gem!”

“She stands to lose a lot, coming with us,” Garnet answered. “Leaving a place that must feel like the only home she’s known. Leaving gems that are the only gems she can remember having any bond with.”

Pearl had admittedly not given that possibility much consideration. Then she shook her head, firmly. “That doesn’t matter. She’s only been there for a few days at best. She must know something’s off, right?”

“It’s impossible to tell,” Garnet muttered. “We’re out of our element.”

Pearl deflated. “If she decides to stay with them, it’ll be a decision she makes without all the information.” 

“It’ll still be hers to make,” Garnet replied. “We can’t exactly fly up there and kidnap her. As we are right now, we’re earthbound, like you said.”

Steven was frowning. He of course missed Amethyst terribly; he wouldn’t pretend otherwise. But if she was happy where she was, in her new home with her new life, he didn’t know how any of them could convince her to take a chance on them and leave. Steven tried to consider it from her point of view. If he’d had some other life before the Crystal Gems, and one day those people contacted him and asked him to come back, he didn’t know how he’d be able to bring himself to leave, even with evidence. Still, he wanted to believe she’d choose them over the others. “What do we do now?” he asked after taking a minute to think it all over. 

“Right now, we wait,” Garnet stated. “A day or two. And then we try and contact her, again. One way or another.” 

“And if she’s decided to stay?” Pearl asked. 

Garnet’s voice was carefully emotionless when she spoke, again. “Then we leave her alone.” 

“B-but I’m sure she’ll come!” Steven added, quickly. “The zoo gems will help her and she’ll come back! She’ll get her memories restored and everything will be normal, again!” He couldn’t be sure of that, and Garnet couldn’t see what she’d decide. But he couldn’t stand seeing Pearl looking so dejected. He had to cheer her up, somehow. “I can’t wait for her to come back, I’m gonna hug her so much. Even if she gets all embarrassed, I don’t care!”

“Yes, we’ll all have to get our hugs in,” Garnet agreed, smiling. “She’ll be getting lots of hugs and attention from all of us.”

“Yeah! We’ll have to have a party for her!” Steven added. “With balloons and everything! And presents!”

“That’s a good idea,” Garnet enouraged. “She’ll feel very appreciated.” 

“Aw, and then… we’ll hug her some more!” 

Garnet chuckled. She noticed that Pearl had slipped away and the front door swung closed. Steven noticed as well. He felt some of his excitement drain away. 

–

Pearl took a seat on the roof of the beach house and leaned back with her arms out behind her, staring up at the stars. She could pick out Homeworld’s location in the night sky with ease. After so many years, it was practically automatic for her to do so. The first thing she looked for. And as always, she found it and gazed up at it with conflicted feelings. 

She heard someone climbing the roof and Pearl turned in time to see Steven’s head pop up. He scrambled up onto the slanted surface, getting to his feet and putting his arms out for balance as he took a few steps forward. Pearl got up and reached for him, taking both his hands in hers to help him balance. She walked backwards, bringing him to the spot she’d been sitting. They both sat down. “Hi, Pearl,” Steven greeted her. “Did you want some company?” 

“I’m always happy with your company,” Pearl answered. “I may not be great company, though.” 

“That’s okay!” Steven settled into a comfortable seated position. Pearl did the same. She returned to looking at the night sky but she could see Steven looking at her out of the corner of her eye. “Are you excited for Amethyst to come back?” he asked. 

“You don’t have to lie for my benefit,” Pearl said. She looked at Steven. 

“Aw, I’m not. I really do think she’ll come home,” he said, insistently. 

“Garnet was right, though…” Pearl mumbled. She drew her knees up to her chest and hugged her arms around them. “Maybe at the human zoo, with the other Amethysts, she’s got everything she needs…” 

“Yeah… maybe. But even so…” Steven trailed off. “She doesn’t have you.”

Pearl felt herself frown but she decided not to worry so much about concealing things from Steven. It hardly seemed to matter anymore. “I don’t know what I can give her,” she muttered, sadly. “I don’t even know what I’m capable of giving her.”

“You love her!” Steven pointed out. 

“Of course I do. But I love you, too. And Garnet. I don’t know if it’s enough.”

“Oh come on, Pearl,” Steven sighed. “You love her differently than me or Garnet.”

“Maybe…” Amethyst had certainly been taking up a lot of real estate in her mind as of late, and it had started before she’d been taken. She wanted to see her again. Almost achingly so. And she knew Garnet and Steven weren’t blind to it. “Yes… maybe I do,” Pearl admitted. “I suppose I do love her differently.” She became frustrated with herself. “What does it matter? She’s gone. She’s somewhere out there, and she’s probably much happier than she’s ever been here on earth, with us. With me.” 

“I think she was happy with you, Pearl,” Steven said, touching her arm. 

“Of course it’s only when she’s gone that I even think about… any of this,” Pearl grumbled in frustration. “When it’s safe.”

“Safe, how?” Steven asked. 

Pearl gave Steven a weary smile. “Steven, you must know by now that I was in love with your mother.” 

“Yeah…” 

“Obviously I have mixed feelings over how it all turned out,” Pearl admitted. “You wouldn’t be here if she’d chosen me instead of Greg. And today, I’d never trade you to bring her back. I wouldn’t.” Pearl surprised herself with how certain she felt over that. “But if it was back then… even if someone had told me what I’d have, eventually. I’d probably still have wanted Rose to choose me instead.”

“I get that,” Steven sympathized. “I know that.”

“I loved Rose and I felt like it was alright to do so, because if I was in love with her, it didn’t hurt my devotion to what we were trying to do, here. The rebellion really started with her. She was our leader. I didn’t feel like my priorities were changing. Sometimes the things I did in the war, and beyond that, I did for her and not for this planet… I did the right things, but they were for selfish reasons…” 

“It doesn’t matter how you felt, Pearl,” Steven answered. “You helped save the planet! I don’t care if you were thinking about how much you hated earth the entire time. You still did an amazing thing.”

“It’s much the same for Garnet. She’s here, she’s in this relationship, but it’s her reason for fighting to protect the earth. And Rose’s love was my reason for fighting. When she left… my reason became to protect her memory. And to protect you.” Steven nodded. Pearl felt somewhat more encouraged. “I was, still am, so devoted to Rose’s cause. I don’t want anything to distract me from that…” 

“You mean like… Amethyst?” Steven asked. 

“Yes, like Amethyst,” Pearl said. “I’ve always been very selfish, Steven…” She heard him start to protest that, but she spoke over him. “I’m selfish and I always think about myself, my feelings, my wants. I hope Rose never realized what I really was. But she probably did. I didn’t believe in the earth at all. I just wanted her. I wanted to be by her side. But it was alright because it still looked like I believed in her cause, to everyone around us.” 

“That doesn’t matter,” Steven said, again. “You did a good thing.”

“But could I still be good, if I was with Amethyst?” Pearl asked, softly. “Could I still be impartial if she was my most special one? Would I always make the right choices for the team, for the planet… if I let myself love her?” 

Steven thought it over. “You mean like… if the bad guys said ‘Choose to save the earth or choose to save Amethyst’?” he wondered. 

Pearl laughed. “Hm. Something like that. And listen to me, even now. I’m just thinking about what I want, aren’t I? I assume Amethyst will come home because that’s what I want her to do. But what about what she wants? What about what’s best for her? No, I don’t care about that, do I? I just want her here because I’m so selfish and I want her to come home and live a less fulfilling life with me instead of staying with the gems who can probably give her unconditional love and acceptance.”

Steven frowned. “Pearl, we went to the human zoo before. She met all the other Amethysts and Betas up there. And yeah, you could tell she really liked meeting them and it made her happy. But she still came back with us. She didn’t even look back.”

“Yes… I suppose she did,” Pearl admitted. “But now it’s even less stacked in our favor. She has nothing. She’s completely empty. She’s probably vulnerable and scared and confused… I can’t even imagine how she must be feeling, right now. She has a place there. She’s with the gems she was meant to be with, all along. And we’re asking her to take this incredible risk. Why would she?”

“Be-because she loves us!” Steven protested. “She loves you!”

“Not anymore.”

“I don’t believe that.”

“How could she? They took everything from her.”

“Pearl, she’s still in there somewhere, I know she is,” Steven said. “When I was in her body, I could feel it.” 

Pearl looked incredulous. “You could feel it?”

“Yeah! She knows she’s missing something. And I think the thing she’s missing is you!”

“I think she’s always been missing something, Steven…” Pearl said, softly. “And none of us, not even Rose, could give her what she needed. Roots, an identity, a real family… but she might have that, now. And who am I to stand in the way of that?”  
“Well if you won’t, then I will,” Steven said with sudden firmness in his voice. “I don’t think Amethyst would want us to give up on her so easily, Pearl. She’d want us to fight to get her back. Maybe she doesn’t remember us right now, but she’d want us to bring her home. If she needs to feel like she belongs somewhere, then WE need to show her that we want her here!” He got to his feet and Pearl stared up at him with slightly widened eyes.  
“We’re her family, too! Maybe we’re a broken family and our parts are all janky, and we’re small and we don’t always fit together, but we’re still a family, all of us. And a team!” Steven insisted. “If we give up on Amethyst, then we’ve made her decision for her! If she has to make a decision, let’s at least make it a hard decision! I’m not giving her up without a fight and you shouldn’t, either!”

Pearl’s eyes began to tear up at the stirring speech. “But… what else can we do?” Pearl asked. 

“We can call her,” Steven said. 

—

“Blue Diamond doesn’t think you’ve given this your very best try,” Tourmaline was saying over her video call with Holly. “She’s disappointed.”

Holly felt a sting, thinking of Blue Diamond being disappointed with her. It was an almost unbearable thought. And a terrifying one.

“It’s very important that we do our best, Holly,” Tourmaline added. “Your request has been denied. However… if you think you’re not up to the task, we can send someone to collect 8XM and take her to another outpost. Although her chances of integrating into another quartz unit diminish further…”

Holly didn’t know what to do. She couldn’t very well tell Tourmaline that 8XM was a rebel who had humiliated her in a prior encounter, and had taken two humans from their facility. If she agreed to send her off, she ran the risk of losing Blue Diamond’s favor. The human zoo meant a lot to her Diamond. And the zoo would forever be tarnished by Holly’s failure to wrangle a single, defective Amethyst. “No… she’ll stay here, for now…” Holly muttered. 

“If she’s really an issue, I could send someone, maybe spare a few additional gems to increase security. Give you some backup. Assuming you need it,” Tourmaline offered. 

“It isn’t necessary,” Holly answered. She didn’t want to stretch resources and draw attention to the zoo. “Not at the moment.”

“Ah, there you go! All you needed was confidence!” Tourmaline said, grinning. As always, there was a mocking tone under her words. “You know, Holly Blue, if you pull this off, you will look very good in our Diamond’s eyes. Perhaps enough to be rewarded.”

Holly’s interest was piqued. “Rewarded?”

“Hmmm… perhaps.” Tourmaline turned in her chair and beckoned to someone off camera. A Pearl walked into the frame. Tourmaline smiled at her. “You’d like a Pearl, they’re so handy to have around.” Tourmaline purposefully knocked something off her desk. “Pick it up,” she instructed the Pearl. 

The Pearl bowed her head and ducked out of the frame to retrieve it. “They’re so eager to please their owners. They’ll really do anything you want. Or need…”   
Holly frowned. “I see…”

The Pearl came back up, setting the items back on the desk. Tourmaline leaned out of her chair, looking expectantly at the Pearl. The Pearl hesitated, then seated herself on Tourmaline’s lap. Holly’s frown deepened. Tourmaline stroked her fingers through her Pearl’s hair, smirking at Holly. 

“Know what I mean?” Tourmaline asked. 

“I don’t know if I need a Pearl for that…” Holly said, uncomfortably. 

“No, I suppose you don’t. You have your quartzes to take care of that, don’t you?”

“Absolutely not!” Holly gasped, in outrage. “I don’t know what you think is going on here, Tourmaline, but I assure you it’s all professional!”

“Oh come on, Holly,” Tourmaline purred. “You can tell me. It’ll stay between us.” Her hand had traveled over the Pearl’s torso, stroking her suggestively. The Pearl squirmed and looked away from the camera. 

“Stop that!” Holly cried, unable to conceal her shock.

Tourmaline let her Pearl go and the Pearl hurriedly stood up, bowing her head. “Go, go make yourself useful,” Tourmaline muttered, dismissing her with a hand wave. The Pearl hurried off and out of Holly’s sight. “Really Holly, you’re such a bore,” Tourmaline sighed. “You’ve gotten so crusty since you started working at that human zoo. You used to love to play.”

Holly bristled; it was hard not to. She didn’t, couldn’t, respond directly to that statement.

“Tourmaline, you’re completely out of line…” Holly said, trying to speak in a voice that sounded authoritative. Tourmaline merely smirked at the words. “I should report you right now for mistreating that Pearl…” Not that Holly cared much about the Pearl at all. But she was eager to bust her long-time rival for misconduct. 

“You’re so gauche,“ Tourmaline sniffed. "I can assure you, my Pearl is quite content with me as her owner. You could ask her yourself, if you doubt me.” Holly gave a huff of frustration. Pearls, stupid things that they were, almost never spoke out against owners who mistreated them. And unfortunately, although the Diamonds certainly hadn’t created Pearls with THAT sort of function in mind, they couldn’t exactly police what happened behind closed doors. 

“If we’re done here…” Holly began.

“Yes, yes,” Tourmaline sighed, her disappointment obvious. “Go on, back to your duties. We’ll be in touch.”

Holly ended the call in a hurry and she sat back in her chair, exhaling. Stars, it was exhausting. She’d had almost as much as she could take of Tourmaline, and this entire Nonresistance experiment. She didn’t give a tiny clod what happened to 8XM. None of them, really. But especially her. She wanted her out, she wanted her gone. She didn’t care about rewards; what was the point of having a Pearl if there was no one to impress, anyways? It wasn’t as though she was so feeble that she couldn’t get her own door. Holly just wanted to put it all behind her. The only reward she wanted was a transfer.

There was urgent knocking on her door. Holly stood up but she took her time making her way over. The only gem who would dare to knock on her door was Jay, and Holly was fairly sure she already knew what this was in regards to. 8XM. Of course.

Holly opened the door, sure enough to the frantic face of 8XJ. “What.”

“What happened to 8XM? Where is she??” Jay asked, worriedly.

“She tried to attack me.“

“Oh, no…”

“Not well, mind you,” Holly added. She almost felt like she needed to reassure 8XJ of that. Not that 8XJ seemed at all concerned about her, just 8XM. “So I let her cool off in a holding cell in corridor C.”

“I’m so sorry, Holly! Look, it was all my fault, okay? She’s still new, she doesn’t know any better. Don’t punish her. I was the one who was supposed to watch her and I failed.”

Holly frowned. “I should’ve known better than to trust that any of you could keep your mouths shut.”

Jay hung her head. “Is it alright if I see her?” she inquired. 

“I suppose so… you and you only, though.”

“Thank you, Holly…”

Holly said nothing else. She was worn down and using most of her energy to figure out what she was planning to do, next. Once again, Jay’s peacekeeping skills were invaluable to her. She would be able to convince 8XM to submit. At least she hoped so. 

When they arrived at the cell, 8XM could see them coming and she got to her feet, standing as close to the field as she could. “JAY!” she cried. Jay broke into a run, rushing to the cell. Without asking permission, she took the force field down. Holly decided to leave it be and she lingered in the background, arms crossed.

Jay dropped to her knees, gathering 8XM up in a tight hug. “Are you okay?!” she asked. She pulled back from 8XM to regard her with concern. 

“Hey, I was the one attacked…” Holly muttered, under her breath.

Tears sprang into 8XM’s eyes. “You lied to me…” she said, her voice hoarse and without much bite. Jay bit her lip and she hugged 8XM again. 

“I had to… I didn’t want to, I swear…” Jay whispered. “I’m so sorry, M… I never would’ve lied to you if I thought it was going to put you in danger… but I thought it was the best way to keep you safe.”

8XM believed Jay. She also knew that she had limited options. She needed allies. She needed someone in her corner. She relented and returned the hug. “I believe you… I’m a Crystal Gem…?”

Jay paused, then nodded. “Yeah…”

“On earth… they’re missing me… Steven and… the others…”

Jay nodded again, wordlessly. 

“They said they can bring back my memories…” 

“What?” Jay asked, pulling back from 8XM again and staring at her. “They said that?“ Jay glanced in Holly’s direction, but the blue Agate looked skeptical of the claim.

“Yeah…”

“How?”

“I don’t know.”

“It’s impossible,” Holly asserted. She was leaning against the wall. “There’s no way to restore the memories. They’re gone. Deleted. They aren’t stored somewhere to be retrieved.”

“Maybe they have a way!” 8XM insisted.

“XL said they talked through you… are they coming?” Jay asked.

“They want me to come to them, I think…” 8XM answered. “Can I do that…?”

“We could… I mean, I’m guessing you can’t drive a ship, but we could set it’s coordinates. What do you want to do, M?” Jay looked at her, seriously. “You’ve got my support, okay? You wanna stay, you can stay. No one’s getting rid of you. But if you wanna go…” Jay drew a breath. “That’s fine, too. They’re your family, too.”

“I don’t know what to do… I’m so confused…” 8XM answered. “I don’t even know them! Not anymore…”

“Excuse me, but I don’t think either of you asked for my authorization on this little scheme of yours,” Holly said from where she was. 

“C’mon, Holly…” Jay urged. “You don’t want her here. You hate this Nonresistance thing. We can make up something! M freaked out and stole a ship!”

“A ship that’s incredibly easy to track…” Holly answered.

“We’ll put the cloaking mechanism up!”

“And how would she have escaped on her own?” Holly inquired.

“I… I’d help her! Blame me!” Jay insisted. 

Holly raised an eyebrow. “You’d be shattered for that.”

“That’s… I’ll deal with that, then…”

“No!” 8XM gasped, latching her arms around Jay’s neck. She almost aggressively smushed her cheek against Jay’s. “Don’t. You. Dare.”

“I agree with 8XM,” Holly said. “Don’t be so absurd, Jay. You falling on your sword helps no one.“

Jay had to take a second to process that Holly Blue Agate had just called her by her nickname. Holly didn’t seem to realize she had and Jay tried not to focus on it. "W-well… we have to do something!”

“Do we?” Holly asked. 

“Wait! I never said I was going, anyway!” 8XM interjected. “I don’t even know if I want to!”

“Of course you do, M…” Jay said, sadly. “I thought you were safe here with us, but maybe you’re not… and you’re not happy.”

“Before we decide anything, remember I’m still in charge,” Holly reminded them. “I have reports on Nonresistance that might be helpful to us…”

Jay and 8XM turned from each other to regard their Agate with surprise. 8XM’s eyes shone and Holly scowled and looked away. “Don’t read into it, brat!” Holly warned. She stumbled backwards when 8XM suddenly rushed at her, latching onto her waist and hugging her. 

“I’m sorry I attacked you, Holly! You’re actually nice, underneath!” 8XM declared. Jay watched, mortified. 

“Ack! Get off of me,” Holly grumbled, trying to peel the clingy Amethyst off her. “What do I look like? 8XJ, help me, for Diamond’s sake! Don’t just sit there, gawking!”

–

Pearl drove the van up the winding road that would take their group to the barn. Once they’d arrived and parked, Steven flung himself out of the vehicle, stumbled, and then began running to the barn. “PERIDOT! LAPIS!” he called, hoping to summon them from the barn’s interior. Pearl stepped out of the driver’s side of the van, while Garnet opened the back and hopped out. It was the next morning, and the trio found themselves in desperate need of Peridot’s engineering skills. Not that Pearl was incompetent at it, but she was less familiar with modern gem technology. And two heads were always better than one. 

“I hope this works…” Pearl sighed as she walked along side Garnet, up the grassy hill towards the barn. 

“There’s no harm in trying,” Garnet answered. Pearl smiled.

The two gems arrived just in time to find Steven squeezing both Lapis and Peridot together in a hug. He released them after a moment and both Peridot and Lapis took a moment to recover from it. Peridot took notice of Pearl coming up behind Steven. “Ah, Pearl. Steven tells me that you’re in need of my expertise in contacting Amethyst at the human zoo?” 

Pearl pursed her lips. “Yes…” she admitted. 

“We were thinking, since you contacted the Kindergarten from Homeworld before, that would be the best place to start!” Steven said, excitedly to Peridot. “If it can take inbound calls, it can make outbound calls, right?” 

“Perhaps. Assuming you haven’t destroyed it…” Peridot said, squinting at Garnet in particular. 

“It’s okay! I’ve got healing spit, remember?” Steven reminded her. “I’ll fix whatever’s broken!”

“You’re going to lick every surface in the Kindergarten?” Pearl asked, setting her hands on her hips.

Steven looked determined. “If that’s what it takes!”

Lapis hung back at the barn while the Crystal Gems and Peridot made their way to the Kindergarten via the nearest warp pad. When they arrived, they stepped off together and Peridot led the way. Pearl glanced guiltily at Garnet, but her glance wasn’t returned. Pearl looked forward again, her shoulders falling in a silent sigh. They eventually found the platform that took them to the subterranean level of the Kindergarten. When they eventually arrived at the communication hub, Peridot stepped off the platform and walked to the control panel, with Steven following right behind her. Pearl and Garnet arrived as Peridot was activating the holo screen, which flickered to life above their heads, although all it showed was static. Peridot punched a few things in, stopped and waited, but error messages kept popping up on the screen. 

“No signal. Of course…” Peridot grumbled. Pearl came to stand next to her. 

“I can help, what do you need?” Pearl offered. 

“Hm. Well first, we need someone to fix the wiring…” Peridot started to point but Steven was already enthusiastically taking the panel off the wall. 

“On it!” Steven said. “I’ll use my healing powers!”

“Wait, Steven,” Garnet said, stepping behind him and putting her hand on his shoulder. “Those are live wires.” 

“That’s right! You could get shocked!” Pearl gasped. 

“I’ll handle it.” Garnet crouched down, summoning her gauntlets. She reached inside, gripping the wires. The wires began to electrocute her, although it didn’t harm her. Steven took a few steps back. The lights and screens in the room began to flicker on and off. Then it powered down, plunging them all into darkness. Pearl summoned her gem light. 

“Everyone’s alright?” Pearl asked. 

“I’m fine,” Steven said. 

“All good, here,” Garnet said. She stood up fully, dusting her hands off. “That should do it.” 

“I hope you’ll be able to restore the power afterwards,” Peridot muttered. “Okay Steven, do your thing!”

Steven saluted Peridot before he crawled into the panel and began working to try and repair the broken wiring. Garnet instructed him on which ones needed fixing and used her gems to light his way. Meanwhile, Peridot and Pearl began working to fix the controls. 

“I have the coordinates for the Human Zoo,” Pearl said to Peridot. 

“Yes. Very good,” Peridot answered. “As soon as Amethyst sees us, she’ll realize how superior we are to those clods at the zoo. Nyeh heh heh.” 

“That’s the hope…” Pearl murmured. 

“I must say… I read a lot of reports, but I’ve never heard of Nonresistance,” Peridot added. She glanced down and spoke in a smaller voice. “I hope Amethyst is going to be okay…” 

“Me too…” Pearl agreed. “We don’t know much about it, ourselves.”

“We’re in good shape, though,” Peridot assured her. “If we can get this tech back to functional order, it shouldn’t be all that hard to make the call. The question is whether anyone’s going to answer.” 

“Maybe if we look official…” Pearl mused. 

“Tch. Well none of you fit that bill,” Peridot said with a titter of amusement. “I’ll put it through. You three stay out of sight until I can get through to someone who can help.”

“Well, be careful…” Pearl warned. “The Agate at the zoo is… a piece of work.” 

Peridot snickered. “All Agates are, am I right?” 

Pearl giggled. “I suppose so.”

The gems worked for hours to get things functional. Steven had to keep trying to replenish himself with lots of water, although eventually he had to go to the surface to relieve himself as well. It was slow and frustrating work. Once Garnet restored the power, Pearl and Peridot worked to try and get the signal working. Steven and Garnet hung back, watching at first. Eventually though, as time went on, they began to get bored. Garnet had taken to leaning against the wall in the corner with her arms crossed. Steven was seated on the floor, playing a game on his phone. Eventually, he’d fallen asleep.

Pearl was almost ready to call it quits, herself. Her fingers were sore from working. She was finding it difficult to stay concentrated. The underground room was cold and sunless, even worse than the Kindergarten’s surface. Something about being there made her feel lethargic. But then the holo screen finally changed from static, to a calling screen and both Peridot and Pearl gasped together in disbelief. “Oh, we did it…” Pearl whispered. 

“Alright, everyone hide!” Peridot instructed. 

Garnet snapped to attention, scooping Steven up under one arm and ducking behind the platform. Pearl jumped to join her. Steven was of course roused from his sleep and he started asking what was happening, only to have Pearl put a finger to his lips. “Hush. We got through,” she whispered. 

“Oh!” Steven gasped. 

Peridot stood at attention, nervous. She’d discussed with Pearl over what to say, but she was still worried she wouldn’t be convincing enough. 

–

In her room, Holly was going through the old reports on Nonresistance again, and had been for a while. Jay and 8XM were in the background, but they’d long lost interest in reading. They were still formulating a plan. It was complete madness to think it would work. They’d most certainly be caught and punished. Holly was sure of it. And yet, her desire for Nonresistance to fail was stronger than her own self preservation. She was willing to lie on her reports, but she needed to learn exactly what had happened to the test subjects in order to make it convincing for Homeworld. The reports she’d gone through were disturbing, to say the least. She’d spared Jay and 8XM the most graphic details, but it didn’t look promising. In early tests, gems who had undergone Nonresistance were typically violent, confused and eventually took to harming themselves when they had no other outlet for their aggression. Most of the gems had ended their own lives by inflicting gem-destroying injuries to themselves. Thankfully, 8XM didn’t seem to be showing those symptoms. But such side effects made Holly wonder why Homeworld would even continue with the program. She supposed it was because of what they all knew, even if they wouldn’t admit it. The Diamonds had little interest in gems as their subjects. They were merely tools to be used and disposed of when they were faulty. 

There was a call that had been coming in on and off for almost ten minutes, which Holly had been trying to ignore. She had no interest in talking to Tourmaline, again. But it was persistent, and continuously popped up to interrupt her research. Finally Holly tapped the screen, only to see that the call was coming from an unknown location. Odd. Holly finally accepted it and the video screen popped up, flooding the entirety of the interface. 

On the screen was a Peridot. Holly couldn’t imagine what business a Peridot had in contacting her. “This is Peridot Facet-2F5L Cut-5XG,” she said. “Putting out a call to Blue Diamond’s Human Zoo. Is this the Human Zoo?” 

“It is…” Holly said, confused and a little annoyed. She outranked a Peridot. She could be as rude as she liked. “Please make this snappy, Peridot. I’m a very busy gem at the moment.” 

“Of course,” Peridot answered. “This is regarding your new Amethyst…” She trailed off. Peridot glanced behind her, where Steven was poking his head over the top of the platform. He cupped his hand around his mouth. 

“Amethyst 8XM,” he whispered, theatrically. 

“A-ah, Amethyst 8XM,” Peridot clarified, looking back into the screen. 

In Holly’s room, 8XM perked up at the mention of her name. “Who is that?” she asked. 

“Shh!” Holly hissed at her. 

“Who is it?” 8XM asked again, more persistently. She went to the screen and popped up next to Holly in the feed. 

“What the- would you behave yourself?!” Holly cried. 

“Amethyst?!” Peridot exclaimed. 8XM looked at her through the screen. 

“Uh, hi?” 8XM offered, uncertainly. Holly struggled with her, trying to push her head down. 

Pearl, Garnet and Steven came up over the platform. “Is that her? Is she there?!” Steven cried. He ran up next to Peridot, bumping her out of the way. “Amethyst, is that you?!” 

8XM’s eyes widened. “S-Steven?” 

“Yeah! It’s me!”

Holly finally moved off the chair and let 8XM take over. She scowled at the sight of the boy on the screen, but she didn’t interfere. What did she care, at that point?

Steven’s eyes had begun to tear up at the sight of Amethyst on the screen in front of him. She looked the same. He wiped at his eyes with his arm. “D-did you get my message?” he asked. 

“Yeah…” 8XM said, softly. She smiled. “Aw, you don’t gotta cry about it… Everything’s okay.” 

“You’re safe?” Steven asked, worriedly. “You’re not hurt?”

8XM smiled. “Nah. I’m fine. It’s… good to talk to you face to face, finally.”

Steven looked a little guilty. “I’m really sorry I had to jump into your body like that. I didn’t ask permission. I just didn’t know what else to do.” 

“Hey, don’t worry about it,” 8XM reassured him. She didn’t even care about that. It hardly ranked on the scale of most violating things to happen to her, lately.

“Ah… the others are here, too…” Steven pulled back from the camera. Pearl and Garnet leaned in on either side of him, eager to get a look at Amethyst, to see for themselves that she was alright. Garnet had removed her visor. 8XM looked at the three of them but only Steven was familiar to her, and only because she’d seen him in her head briefly, both times he’d made contact with her. Even so… The other two gems were regarding her with such… 8XM couldn’t put a word to the emotion. Hope, happiness, sorrow, all together. 8XM didn’t know them at all but they clearly knew her. There was no way they could fake it like that. It was too genuine, too raw. It made her feel emotional thinking that she’d come to the zoo with no memories, no friends, nothing to tie her to anything… and there were so many gems who seemed to care so much for her.

And then 8XM felt something strange. A warmth bloom inside her chest. A feeling, a connection. It hit her with almost dizzying certainty. She had to go back to them. She didn’t know them but something inside her knew them. Something remembered how she felt for them. It was almost overwhelming to her. 8XM couldn’t remember a single thing about any of them, and yet seeing them for the first time, she felt like she was about to break apart, the emotion was so strong. She missed them. She’d been missing them. Somehow she knew she was missing them. Seeing them filled her with so many feelings. Yearning to be there with them. Sorrow that she wasn’t. Happiness at seeing them. She couldn’t stay at the zoo. She couldn’t disappoint them. She couldn’t bear to break their hearts. She only wanted to protect them and make them happy, any way she could. She hated herself suddenly, for making them so worried.

“Hey, Amethyst…” Garnet greeted, trying to keep her voice steady. “It’s good to see you again, finally.” 

“Hi…” 8XM answered, softly. She looked to Pearl, who was openly crying at that point. 

“Amethyst…” Pearl whispered. “It’s really you. You’re really there… Oh, I…” She was overcome with emotion, and 8XM could feel it stirring inside her as well. 

Garnet moved out of the frame and she put an arm on Steven’s shoulder, tugging him back as well. Steven seemed to understand and he moved away, giving Pearl some space. Pearl didn’t notice. Her focus was on Amethyst. 8XM’s focus was on Pearl.

“I thought you’d been shattered, Amethyst…” Pearl whispered. Even at a whisper, she was choking on her sobs. “I thought you’d died and I just… I just accepted it. I just gave up on you so easily. I’m so sorry, Amethyst… I’m so sorry. I didn’t know. If I’d known…”

“It’s okay…” 8XM said, almost pleadingly. She didn’t know what the old her would’ve said to comfort her in a situation like this. She wished she could’ve remembered, if only to make her feel better. She would’ve done anything at that moment, to make Pearl stop crying. She felt like something twisted inside her gut every time she heard her weep. “I’m not mad, I promise.”

“You would have every right to be…” Pearl sniffled. “I’ve done nothing but let you down, it seems.” 

“Well… you’re here now, aren’t you?” 8XM countered. “I’m seriously not mad. I’m just… happy to see you, Pearl.”

Pearl gasped. She put her hands over her mouth, muffling her speech. “I’m happy to see you, too.”

“Yeah?” 8XM asked, sounding hopeful.

“Of course I am!” Pearl lowered her hands and tried to get a hold of herself. “We’re going to fix you,” she promised.

8XM’s expression became serious. “Even if you can’t, I want to be there.”

“Y-you do?” 

“Yeah… I don’t mind starting over with you. Uh, with you guys.” 

“Oh, Amethyst…” Pearl sobbed. “You’re so wonderful.”

8XM felt her cheeks flush a bit. “W-well…” She awkwardly scratched the back of her head. “I’m coming, okay? So… you don’t need to cry over me anymore. I’m pretty sure I’m not worth it.”

“Of course you are,” Pearl insisted. “Please never say that you’re not, ever again…” 

8XM was taken aback but she nodded. “O-okay,” she agreed. 

“But we have no way of getting there,” Pearl added. “We don’t have a ship. Can you really get here?” 

“I’m gonna try my best,” 8XM answered. Then she felt more determined. “No, I AM gonna get to earth.” 

“We’ll be here. I’ll… be here.”

8XM smiled. “I can’t wait to see you again.” 

“I wanna see Amethyst, too!” Peridot said, suddenly. She pouted and tugged on Pearl’s ribbon. “Don’t hog her!”

“R-right, yes…” Pearl said, standing aside. Peridot, Garnet and Steven squished themselves together to look at 8XM. They pelted her with questions. Peridot and Steven spoke over each other. 

“Did it hurt?” 

“No.”

“You can’t remember anything at all?” 

“No, sorry.”

“When are you gonna get here?”

“As soon as I can.”

And there were others, less urgent ones about how 8XM had been doing at the Human Zoo. Pearl half-listened, from the place she was standing in the corner. Her cheeks were burning with a fresh blush. She had confidence that the Chest of Souls could restore Amethyst to the way she was. But even if it didn’t… she couldn’t believe Amethyst didn’t care about that. She wanted to come home. They’d been worried for nothing. She was coming home, memories or not. And even if she didn’t get them back… She was still herself. She was still Amethyst. Her Amethyst. Pearl had been so afraid she’d be completely empty, completely devoid of any connection to them. But she clearly wasn’t. There was so much of her still left. The worst case would be that Pearl would have to start again with her. But she could do it right, this time, if it came to that. They could fill in the gaps. Amethyst had always been strong. She was strong enough for this, too. 

Pearl wanted to tell Amethyst she loved her. It wouldn’t mean as much right now, because Amethyst couldn’t remember waiting and wishing to hear it from her. No, Pearl clarified it in her head. She didn’t love Amethyst. She was in love with Amethyst. And she was coming home.


	10. Escape

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And with that, I've updated this as far as I've currently completed! Next chapter will be along soon but in the mean time, thanks for reading this far.

It was finally Holly who stepped in to end the call, although to her credit, she tried to be as gracious as possible about it. 8XM and the Crystal Gems got emotional all over again, having to say goodbye. Holly needed a few earth days, at least, to begin to sprinkle details into her reports that would make 8XM seem unstable and faulty. But keeping it subtle enough so as not to rouse too much suspicion was also key. Anything too alarming would bring them under Homeworld’s microscope. When the call finally ended, 8XM was bouncing around the room, as excited as either Jay or Holly had ever seen her. Her happiness was infectious to Jay and she was eager to get their plan moving. She wanted 8XM to be home just as much as 8XM did. It would hurt to let her go again, but Jay’s doubts had been eased. It was obvious to her that 8XM was needed and that her friends wanted her home.

“It’s so weird, it’s like I’ve known them all along!” 8XM was saying. She was downright giddy. Holly, finally fed up with the merriment, shooed Jay and 8XM into the hall and closed her door on them. 

“That’s great, though!” Jay exclaimed. “I mean… it also makes it seem like maybe what they did to you didn’t actually totally work.”

8XM paused, considering that. “Huh. Yeah, maybe you’re right. I didn’t think about that. Nonresistance, right? Ugh, what a gross name.”

“Tell me about it,” Jay agreed, distastefully. “Even Holly doesn’t like it, and she loves Blue Diamond!”

“It’s a mean thing to do,” 8XM said. “I don’t remember exactly how it felt, though. I wonder… I guess it must’ve felt bad.”

“You’d really be okay with not ever getting your memories back, though?” Jay asked. 

8XM shrugged. “I hope I will but if I don’t, I won’t be any worse off than I am now, right?" 

"Heh. You’re so optimistic!” Jay said. “Aw… I’m gonna miss you though, peewee…” She suddenly grabbed 8XM around the head and gave her an affectionate noogie. 

“Ack! No! Jay!” 8XM laughed, squirming in her grasp. Jay released her after a moment and 8XM tried to smooth out her rustled hair. “I can’t wait to get home, though! I wonder how it’s gonna go down… Maybe I’ll come back and I’ll start remembering stuff. Or… well even if I don’t, it might be kinda cool. I could get introduced to my favorite things for the first time, again!”

“I guess we should tell the others, too,” Jay said, walking with 8XM down the hallway. 

“Hey, why don’t we all go?” 8XM suggested. 

“Where? To earth?” Jay asked, chuckling. “What about the humans at the zoo? Who would look after them?" 

"We’d bring them! Isn’t that where humans come from, anyways?" 

"It’s a nice thought, M…” Jay affectionately tousled her hair. “But I don’t think it’s gonna happen. At least not soon… Maybe someday? I’d love to see the earth again.”

“You could visit!” 8XM suggested. “Holly would let you go!”

“Heh… I don’t think Holly’s gonna let any of us do anything once this is all over and done with,” Jay said, a note of bitterness in her voice. 

“Why not? Isn’t she… helping us?" 

"Because it suits her,” Jay replied. “I wouldn’t get too cozy with Holly if I were you… She just wants you gone, and she doesn’t like Nonresistance. That’s the only reason she’s helping us.”

“Oh…” 8XM frowned. “I guess I thought maybe it was just an act, you know? Holly pretending she doesn’t like us. I thought you and her were kinda close.”

Jay shook her head, quickly. “We’re not… Definitely not.” She wasn’t sure what 8XM meant by “close”, exactly, but she didn’t think they were close by any measure. 

“I think she likes you, Jay. I mean at least, she likes you more than anyone else, here. And that includes me, even though I’m so irresistible.”

“Heh, irresistibly cute, maybe,” Jay laughed. She ignored the rest.

The next few days passed without incident. Although 8XM was antsy to get home, she also wanted to make sure they stuck to the plan. Holly began to lie about her behavior in her reports, while making sure it was also clear that it wasn’t anything she couldn’t handle. 8XM, displaying mildly aggressive tendencies. 8XM seeming agitated. 8XM put to work alone because of behavioral issues. Nothing that would warrant sending someone out to take a look. But enough to sow seeds of doubt into the effectiveness of Nonresistance. It was also to ensure that 8XM’s eventual escape seemed more plausible. In the meantime, Jay took 8XM to look at the small ships they had on hand at the zoo. Sharky had tagged along and she gave Jay a boost into the cockpit. 

"So you won’t have to really worry about piloting this thing,” Jay explained, leaning out of the cockpit to look down at 8XM and Sharky, standing below. “What we’ll do is set it to autopilot." 

"I don’t know where on earth the gems are,” 8XM said. 

“No worries. We’ve got gem scanners,” Jay answered. 

“Yeah, it’ll lock onto one of them and take you to that area,” Sharky assured her, grinning her fangy grin. “You got nothing to worry about.”

“How long will it take to get there?” 8XM asked. 

“A few hours, maximum,” Jay replied. “Not really that long." 

"Ughhhh I wanna go right noooowww…” 8XM whined. “Lemme go, now!” She hung off Sharky’s arm. “This sucks!”

“You’re just eager to get back to that cute Pearl, I bet,” Jay teased. She jumped down from the cockpit, to 8XM’s bewildered face. 

“What? No I’m not!” she gasped. 

“Ohhh she’s blushing!” Sharky observed, joining in the teasing. “I remember that Pearl. She was pretty hot, yeah." 

"I’m not blushing!” 8XM huffed. “And-” She gave Sharky a bit of a shove. “Don’t gang up on me, you jerks!" 

"They totally had a moment on the call,” Jay continued, grinning at Sharky. 

“Oh yeah?” Sharky asked. “Got kinda hot and heavy for a while, did it?" 

"No!” 8XM was pouting. 

“Hm… I remember when you came here last time,” Sharky continued. “And you were telling us about your friends. And you talked about the Pearl…”

“Oh ho ho! Yeah, I remember that,” Jay agreed. 

“What? What’d I say?” 8XM demanded to know. She pulled at Sharky’s arm. “What did I say about her?" 

"Oh, y'know. Stuff." 

Jay chuckled but she decided she couldn’t tease poor 8XM any longer. "Aw, no you didn’t say anything weird about her. You said she was a pretty good fighter, but uhh… that she talks a lot." 

"She does talk a lot, for a Pearl,” Sharky agreed. 

“Oh yeah, definitely. I’ve never heard a Pearl talk as much as her!” 

"Sounds like she can’t wait for you to get back to earth, though…” Sharky added, suggestively. “Maybe you guys were together or something.”

“Like a couple?” 8XM asked. She hadn’t thought of such a thing. It seemed to her that if she and Pearl had been a couple, Pearl might’ve thought to let her know during the call. Although, maybe she didn’t want to put undue pressure on her or make her feel bad for not remembering. 8XM felt herself deflate a little. If they had been together, maybe she’d upset Pearl by not acknowledging it, somehow. Being forgotten by a loved one had to be a difficult thing to deal with. “Aw man, what if you guys are right…” 8XM fretted. “Crap, maybe I should’ve said something else… Do you really think we were a couple??" 

"It’s possible,” Jay said with a shrug. “Sure seemed like there was something between you guys. Like a mutual thing, though. Did you feel something for her?" 

Jay and Sharky both regarded 8XM in curiosity and 8XM fidgeted under the gaze. 8XM had felt something for all of them. But she didn’t know exactly if any of it had been romantic love. She didn’t know. She’d felt upset that Pearl was upset, but that was just empathy. She didn’t know if anything could be classified as that sort of love. “I don’t know… I guess so…” 8XM said, weakly. “Maybe? I mean… I seem to remember feelings, at least… I dunno.”

“She’s probably gonna have a big surprise for you when you get back!” Sharky laughed. “Get ready.”

“Hey, come on, now…” Jay said, frowning at Sharky. 

8XM fisted her fingers into her hair, looking anxious. “You mean like… sex stuff?” she asked, nervously. 

“Could be,” Sharky answered. Jay gave her a sharp nudge. 

“No, she wouldn’t!” Jay said, quickly. 

“I don’t even know if I’ve ever done that, before!” 8XM cried. 

“You’re an Amethyst?” Sharky asked. 

8XM gave her a confused look. “Yeah?”

Sharky nodded, knowingly. “You’ve done it.”

“You’re freaking her out, stop it!” Jay said to Sharky. “It’s fine, M. We took it too far. We’re sorry, aren’t we, Kay?”

Sharky sighed. “Yeaaah… we were just teasing.”

It didn’t help much, though. 8XM was worrying about it, now. It reminded her all over again that the Crystal Gems really were strangers to her. Strangers she had strong feelings for, but strangers none the less. She didn’t know what Steven liked to do for fun, or how she’d met Garnet or if she and Pearl had been a couple. She didn’t know any of it. They knew all that, surely, but she still couldn’t help but wonder if they’d been hurt in some way by her not knowing. Even if they knew she’d had her memories wiped and her form reset, maybe they were still upset by it. 

8XM was determined to make it all up to each of them. She really couldn’t wait to see them. 

“So…” Jay continued after they’d lapsed into silence. “What we’ll do is we’ll set this ship up to fly and we’ll have it positioned and ready to go. That way you can just hop in.”

8XM nodded, smiling in a nervous way. “Yeah… It’ll work, I know it. You guys…” She looked to Sharky and Jay, emotionally. “I’m really gonna miss you…”

“Aw, you won’t really be too far,” Sharky assured her. “And hey, we’ve got that call set up, now, right? We could call.”

“And you’ll have a ship,” Jay added. 8XM looked at her in surprise. “What? You thought it would come back to us, after?”

“I guess I hadn’t really thought about it,” 8XM admitted with a chuckle. “That’ll be good, yeah.”

“Maybe lay low for a while, though,” Sharky suggested. “Since you know, half of Homeworld’s gonna be out looking for you.” 

“Right…” 8XM agreed. Again, not something she’d given much thought to.

–

On earth, the mood was cautiously optimistic among the Crystal Gems. After spending time mourning Amethyst’s assumed shattering, cautious optimism felt like a festival. Pearl in particular was buzzing with nervous energy. Steven and Garnet had repeatedly reminded her not to agonize over what could go wrong and instead focus on Amethyst returning home. And for much of the time, that’s just what she did. 

Pearl cleaned the beach house from top to bottom. Things around the house had been piling up, even with Greg’s help. Pearl appreciated the man’s help during their difficult time, but he just didn’t keep things as clean as she liked them. So her first task was to clean, and clean almost obsessively. Steven returned home one afternoon to find her sitting up in the rafters, aggressively dusting and scrubbing away. Mounds of dust had fallen to the floor and much of it was stuck to Lion, who was rolling in it and batting it around. 

“Pearl?” Steven called up to her. 

“Oh! Steven! Careful of the dust,” Pearl said to him. Steven went over to Lion and brushed off his fur, displacing a grey cloud of the stuff into the air. 

“You mind if I open some windows?” Steven asked, already going to do so. 

“Go ahead.” 

Steven started cracking them open, one by one. He figured Garnet had made herself scarce to allow Pearl to clean. He considered doing the same. “Are you cleaning for Amethyst?” he asked. 

“I’m cleaning because I haven’t done any in a while,” Pearl answered. 

“I hope she comes home, soon…” Steven said, softly. “I’m really excited to see her, again. I already want to call her again, right away.”

Pearl ceased moving the feather duster and she looked down at Steven, smiling. “Me too,” she answered. Then her expression became more determined. “But we have to be patient… I think we can manage that, right?” 

“Yeah!” Steven said, nodding. 

Pearl lifted one leg over the side of the beam and dropped to the floor, landing on her feet. She dusted herself off, and went to put the feather duster away. Steven trailed behind her. 

“When Amethyst comes back, are you going to tell her how you feel?” he inquired, innocently. 

Pearl opened the cabinet, paused, and then put the feather duster inside. “I suppose I will. This whole experience has given me a new appreciation for living like there’s no tomorrow.” 

“What’ll happen after that?” Steven asked, looking up at her with wide eyes. Pearl looked embarrassed as she closed the cabinet, after retrieving a bottle of hardwood cleaner. 

“What do you mean?” 

“Will you and Amethyst be a couple?” Steven asked. 

Pearl was tickled pink by the idea. She was certainly itching to get her hands on Amethyst, after all that had happened. But she tried not to appear over-eager in front of Steven. “If she’ll have me…” Pearl mumbled, shyly. “It might complicate the dynamics in the Crystal Gems…” She hesitated for a moment. “B-but… I don’t care!”

Steven grinned, widely. “She definitely will!” He put his hands on his cheeks, his eyes getting dewy. “And then you two will be in love!”

Pearl drew in a shaky breath, her last ounce of composure falling away. She leaned down to look at Steven in the eye, excitedly. “Do you really think so?” she asked, nervously. “Oh goodness, I’ve never been in a real relationship, Steven… I’m so nervous! But… oh, imagine if it worked out… ohh…” She was blushing heavily, her expression getting moony as she thought about it. 

Pearl’s imagination began to run through a reel of scenes. Her and Amethyst sitting on a hilltop together, watching the sunset. Her and Amethyst cuddling on the couch. Cute domestic scenes like the two of them cooking together, or Pearl reading while Amethyst snuggled against her. It was almost too much for Pearl and she put a hand over her mouth, closing her eyes and trembling, trying to suppress a squeal. A part of her was aware that she was being ridiculous but the rest of her was off on cloud nine. As soon as she’d stopped fighting and ignoring her feelings for Amethyst, she’d quickly found herself become smitten with her. 

“Pearl…” Steven said softly, gazing at her. “You’re so cute!”

“Oh, stop,” Pearl tittered. “I feel so foolish, right now.” 

“No, it’s so cute!” Steven insisted. “And it’s um… it’s nice. Seeing you happy. Like REALLY happy.”

Pearl gave Steven a puzzled look. “Really happy?”

“Yeah…” Steven became a bit melancholy. “You always seemed really sad, before. Not like… constantly sad, but even when you smiled it seemed sad, sometimes.”

“Well I was sad over Amethyst, of course,” Pearl explained. Steven shook his head. 

“Before that, though.” 

Pearl frowned. “Oh… I see…” Not that she’d always done a great job of concealing her sadness from Steven, sometimes, but she hadn’t expected him to be so observant. She sighed and put a hand on his shoulder. “I’m sorry you noticed that.” 

“Don’t be sorry, Pearl. It’s okay,” Steven assured her. 

“I know I need to find my own source of happiness,” Pearl said. “Not rely on Rose or Amethyst or anyone else to give it to me… but even if Amethyst doesn’t want to be with me, I don’t care. Just having her home will make me very happy.”

Steven stepped forward and hugged Pearl, tightly. “Me too,” he agreed. 

Pearl hugged him back. After a moment, they let go of each other. Pearl beamed at him and she handed him a spray bottle of cleaner and a bristled brush, which Steven took in confusion. “Since you’re here, you can get started on cleaning the grout in the bathroom!” Pearl said. 

Steven laughed. “Okay,” he agreed. “Happy to help!”

–

Holly impatiently tapped her fingers against her desk as she waited for Tourmaline to read her latest report. For whatever reason, the gem had decided to read it while on their video call, which meant Holly’s exhaustive documenting had come back to bite her. Still, she tried to be civil. She sighed in relief when Tourmaline seemed to finish, and sat back. 

“Pity,” Tourmaline said, simply.

“It’s nothing I can’t handle,” Holly answered. “I’m not afraid of any Amethyst, let alone an undersized one.”

“Oh no, of course you’re not,” Tourmaline said with a disappointed sigh. “Even so, this is very upsetting news… The hope was that 8XM would be easy to control, not difficult. She seems to be displaying the symptoms associated with Nonresistance that we observed in the laboratory settings…” 

“It hasn’t escalated to that point, yet,” Holly assured her. “I’ve been giving 8XM solitary tasks and she’s been doing them well enough. On her off hours, she’s still permitted to interact with the other quartzes. I think that isolating her completely would only agitate her condition further. Being an Amethyst and all.” 

“Yes, I agree,” Tourmaline answered. “It doesn’t need to come to that…”

“And it won’t,” Holly added. 

“Hmm…” Tourmaline seemed subdued, clearly disappointed with the latest reports. Holly waited, unsure if it was alright to end the call or not. When Tourmaline didn’t speak again, Holly cleared her throat. 

“Well, if that’s all…” Holly began. 

“There was a transmission you received a few days ago on this very machine,” Tourmaline said. She didn’t sound accusing. She seemed almost bored by it. Holly froze, regardless. Of course there was some monitoring being done and it was professional for Tourmaline to inquire about all incoming transmissions that were unexpected. Holly tried to calm herself and remind herself it was fine and standard procedure. Tourmaline wasn’t suspicious. 

“O-oh, yes…” Holly mumbled. 

“The signal was scrambled, but it looks like it went on for quite a while… who was it?” Tourmaline asked.

Holly tried to think fast. “I-it was Moonstone Facet-6F3B Cut-1AB!” she blurted out. “Calling from Diane. You know…” She tried to shrug. 

Tourmaline’s brows furrowed. “For what purpose?”

“Oh you know how Moonstone is,” Holly said, quickly, trying to wave it off. “She called and then forgot what the call was for! She’s honestly such a spacey thing. So we spent… an inordinate amount of time trying to get her to recall what she’d called for.” 

“That does sound like something Moonstone would do…” Tourmaline relented. “What a perfect waste of time it must’ve been for you. I’ll reprimand her.”

“Please don’t trouble yourself, Tourmaline,” Holly exclaimed. “There’s no need. I already gave her a stern talking to. She was very apologetic.” 

“Hm…” Tourmaline considered it. Then she sighed. “Holly, this has been such a difficult few days for me, you know. I feel as though I may need to take a leave of absence when all is said and done.” 

Holly tried her best to appear sympathetic. “Of course,” she agreed. “You’re working yourself so hard, Tourmaline. You deserve a rest.”

“Unfortunately I’ll have to make one more trip before then. And I’m not looking forward to it at all.” 

“Oh?”

“Yes… You don’t mind if I pop over to your outpost, do you?” Tourmaline asked. 

“A-ah?” Holly stammered. “No, of course I don’t mind! But it really isn’t necessary. Things are running smoothly, here. And what with everything you have going on already.”

Tourmaline was looking over something, taking her eyes off the screen for a moment. “Do you recall a few years ago, when the Human Zoo was retrofitted with updated tech?”

“Yes, of course…”

“Well, some of the updates included better monitoring systems,” Tourmaline said. “Just to keep an eye on things, you know.”

“Right…” 

“I was able to access your video feeds and… I just need a bit of clarification on something,” Tourmaline said, smoothly. 

Holly felt herself go rigid. “Y-yes?”

Tourmaline put a few videos on the screen. Showing 8XM with the other Amethysts, working normally, even being social. She also had the video of 8XM, 8XK and 8XJ in the docking bay with audio included. Holly’s eyes widened. 

“Tell me, Holly…” Tourmaline began, linking her fingers together and resting her chin on top of them. “Why did you feel the need to falsify these reports?” 

“I-it’s not what you think!” Holly gasped. 

“You know, there was another useful feature added during the retrofitting process,” Tourmaline said, grinning. “I have remote access to this entire outpost. And I’ll be taking charge of things from here.” 

“Wh-what?!” Holly cried. 

The lights in her room suddenly shut off, although the monitor remained illuminated. More jarringly, along with the lights, Holly could hear the sound of machinery shutting down. The hums and buzzing that had become the background noise to life at the Human Zoo had all completely ceased. In the hallway outside her room, Holly could hear a few surprised quartz voices asking each other what was going on. “What is the meaning of this, Tourmaline?” Holly demanded, getting to her feet. 

“I’m so sorry to have to tell you this, Holly Blue, but you’re being relieved from your position as manager to the Human Zoo quartzes,” Tourmaline said, speaking coldly. “I will be handling your duties until a suitable replacement can be found. It’s not your fault… unfortunately, a lot of Agates go “soft” in the end.” 

“I have NOT gone soft!” Holly cried. “You can’t do this!” 

“Just sit tight. I’ll be dropping in for a visit and we can have our chitchat, then,” Tourmaline said with a cruel smile. “Until then, all systems aside from Human Life Support have been disabled. This outpost is on lockdown until further notice. Thank you for your patience.” 

Holly gasped as the monitor shut off on its own. She tried to turn it back on, but it wouldn’t work. Holly turned from the computer and crossed her room, heading to the door. She tried to open it, but it wouldn’t work. With a frustrated cry, Holly took a few steps back, then threw herself against the door, hitting it with her shoulder. Even at full force, it didn’t budge. It was of course meant to withstand Quartz strength, easily. Her room was built to be a stronghold in the event of a Quartz riot.

Holly didn’t attempt it again. She sighed in frustration, resting her forehead against the door. A knock at her door startled her. 

“Holly?” Jay’s muffled voice asked through the door. “What’s going on? Everything’s gone out! It’s pitch black out here! All the corridors are sealed off from each other! A bunch of us are trapped!”

“We’re on lockdown, Jay,” Holly explained. “We’ve been found out…” 

There was silence for a moment, followed by Jay clearly trying to get her door open, to no avail. “It’s no use,” Holly said. She slid down to the floor, her back against the door. “Tourmaline’s coming and who knows who else she’ll be bringing along.”

“What about the humans?” Jay asked. “They’ll suffocate without their life support systems on!”

“The humans will be fine,” Holly replied. “They’re safe for now. But we’re not. I suggest you…” Holly trailed off, unsure what she could advise to 8XJ. She’d be easily identified through the video feeds, and her involvement with the plan would be made known. “Try to calm everyone down, if you can.” 

“What about you?” Jay asked, worriedly. 

“Oh, don’t fuss!” Holly snapped. “Go on, take charge of the situation!”

Jay took a step back from the door. “Okay…” she said, softly. “I’ll be back.” 

“Don’t worry yourself over me, I don’t need it,” Holly answered, bitterly. She drew her knees up to her chest. She heard Jay’s footsteps retreating from her door. She let her head rest back against the door and she looked up to the ceiling. Tourmaline had been right about one thing, at least. She had gone soft.

–

Jay hurried through the darkened corridor, trying to locate some of her fellow gems in the confusion. She collided with Chip, who was panicking. Skinny and Carnelian were right with her. Jay tried to awkwardly use her gem as a flashlight but the position of it on her arm didn’t make it ideal, and the light it gave off was purple. She tried to angle herself to get the beam pointed to the three of them. 

“Jay, what’s going on?!” Chip asked, worriedly. 

“Homeworld’s got this place on lockdown,” Jay explained, hurriedly. “They know about 8XM and they’re coming for all of us.” 

“No way!” Carnelian gasped. “What do we do, now?” 

“We need to fight!” Skinny declared. 

“We’re not fighting anyone!” Jay cried. “Worst case scenario, we all get split up and reassigned, that’s all.” 

“You mean separated?” Chip whimpered. 

“It’s better than a shattering,” Jay insisted. The three of them looked so worried and scared and Jay felt utterly helpless in trying to comfort them. She was panicking, too. “Do any of you know where 8XM is?” 

They shook their heads. 

“I’m gonna try and find her,” Jay said. “You three… try to gather everyone you can in one place. Tell them what’s going on.”

“Okay!” Carnelian agreed. She gripped Chip and Skinny by a hand each. “Come on!” She tugged them away and the two taller gems stumbled after her. Jay continued on through the corridor, asking anyone she ran into about 8XM’s whereabouts. But no one had seen her. She could’ve been sealed off in any of the other corridors or even in a room if she happened to be in one. The only thing that made Jay feel better was knowing that she wasn’t alone. Despite Holly’s reports, she hadn’t actually assigned her any solitary tasks. 8XM had at least one other gem with her, and possibly more. 

Eventually Jay rounded a corner and found that she’d ran the full length of the corridor. She couldn’t go anywhere else. She’d knocked on every door on her way through to locate any trapped gems, but Holly was the only one who was trapped in a room, at least in their wing. They were cut off from the others, so it was impossible to get the word out about what was happening. It was likely that all of them were just as scared and panicky as she was. Even more so, since they didn’t know what was happening. 

“Jay!” 8XL called to her. Jay turned as 8XL ran up to her. “Are you okay?? Bandit told me what was happening! We’re screwed!”

“They’re not going to shatter a bunch of perfectly good era-1 quartzes,” Jay answered, trying to be logical about it. “We’ll be okay.” 

“What about 8XM?” El asked, worriedly. “Last I saw her, she was headed to the docking bay with Sharky.” 

“They’re in the docking bay?” Jay gasped. 

“I think. If they got there in time,” El answered. 

“Then they could still get out of here…” Jay said, feeling hopeful.

–

8XM and Sharky hadn’t quite reached the docking bay but they were separated only by a single door, which had come down and blocked their path. The door behind them had also closed, leaving the two of them trapped in a short hallway that they had no way of escaping. Sharky of course didn’t know Tourmaline was coming, but she figured something was wrong. She’d been trying to kick down the door, repeatedly. On the other side, two stationed Amethyst guards were encouraging her through the door, while Sharky kept yelling at them to stand back.

“I think it’s getting weaker!” Sharky grunted. “We’ll get out of here, no problem!”

8XM stood behind her, wanting to help, but unsure of how. She wasn’t as big and burly as Sharky. She was worried she’d just be getting in the way. “Has this ever happened before?” she asked, worriedly. 

“Nope. I dunno why they killed the power, but we’re probably fucked unless we can get you out of here like, right now.” Sharky landed another kick into the center of the door and she grinned when she felt it bend. “Oh yeah, this is gonna give.” 

“Did someone do this?” 8XM asked. 

“Probably. Okay, stand back…” Sharky warned. “YOU GUYS, TOO! I’M SERIOUS!” 8XM took a few more steps back. Sharky did as well. Then she ran at the door with a cry, jumping up at the last second and hanging from her arms by the frame. She swung forward, both feet coming down hard against the door’s surface. It exploded out of the frame and skittered across the floor of the docking bay. Sharky dropped to her feet, grinning. “Thank the stars this place was built in Era-1!”

The two Amethysts in the docking bay hurried around them as Sharky and 8XM came in. 

“Does anyone know what’s going on?” one of them asked. “The power’s never been cut like this before, right??” 

“Someone’s doing it on purpose, I’m sure of it,” Sharky answered. She gestured to 8XM. “I’ll bet it’s about her. The ships’ll still start, yeah?” 

The two Amethysts glanced at each other. “Yeah, but the door…” The forcefield had vanished, and as a precaution, the solid door was programmed to come down and block anyone from coming or going in the event of a power outage.

“Can it be opened manually?” Sharky asked. 

“We’ve never tried it, before…” the second Amethyst said, giving her partner a worried look. “But maybe?”

“Let’s try it!” Sharky declared. 

A few minutes later, the three large Amethysts were working to try and pry the doors open. Again, 8XM stood off to the side. She kept casting nervous glances over her shoulder, worried that someone was going to come up behind them. In her moment of distraction, one of the Amethyst guards stepped away from the door and came up to 8XM, grabbing her around the middle and lifting her up. 

“H-hey, wha?” 8XM cried in surprise. 

“Gotta take you to your ship!” the Amethyst explained. She hopped up onto one of the ships. It was a dark shape in the dim light, but it was positioned differently from the others. Pointed right for the door. It was the ship that was intended to be 8XM’s escape pod. 8XM began to struggle in the other Amethyst’s grip as the cockpit was opened. 

“Wait a minute! Wait a minute!” she cried as she was tossed inside. “No, I can’t… you guys! What about all of you?!” 

“We’ll be okay, but you need to get out of here,” the other Amethyst answered. She reached over 8XM to hit the start button before she closed the door to the ship with 8XM inside. “Get to earth, that’s what’s important!”

The ship lurched to life as the systems started up and the lights flickered on inside. 8XM stood in the middle of it before she turned back to the door to try and open it. It wouldn’t give. “Wait!” she cried. “Let me out!” 

The ship began to move on its own, hovering off the floor and slowly rotating. 8XM spun around to face the window and she could see the ship turning to fully face the door. It had been opened, although clearly not without some effort, as the edges of the door were bent and scuffed. Sharky and the other two Amethysts were standing by. Beyond the door was empty space, dotted with a few stars in the otherwise inky blackness. And 8XM could see another ship approaching. 

“Guys! Turn around!” 8XM cried, jumping up and down and waving her hands. None of the Amethysts were looking out. They were all watching her ship preparing to take off. 

8XM looked over the control panel. She didn’t know anything about how it worked, but she vaguely recalled Jay and Sharky telling her about the laser gun. She began recklessly pushing buttons and sliding her finger over the holographic interface, trying to figure out what did what. 

Sharky finally noticed the laser gun suddenly shifting on top of the ship and her eyes widened, realizing 8XM was going to activate it. 

“Ugh, I told her not to touch anything!” Sharky cried. She turned around and realized a Homeworld ship was bearing down on them, just as the lights in the docking bay turned on, and the door itself widened to fit the ship through it. 

All three Amethysts on the floor scattered from the door. A second later, the laser gun activated, aiming a beam at the side of the incoming ship, and blowing off a large section of it which left it smoking. The laser had disrupted the landing and the ship came down hard, sending shockwaves through the floor. The force was enough to tilt the entire outpost, and everything shifted violently downward, causing several of the parked ships to begin sliding down and towards the open door. 8XM’s ship wasn’t part of it, since hers was hovering. 

The Homeworld ship resembled a giant hand and it opened from the bottom. 8XM watched the gem she recognized as Tourmaline emerge from the ship. Right behind her was her pearl and several dozen armed gem soldiers hurried out behind her. They vastly outnumbered the three Amethysts in the docking bay, and all three were quickly overcome. The two guards surrendered quickly but Sharky put up enough of a fight to warrant using a destabilizer on her, which caused her body to poof. 

The ship was still preparing to launch and it moved around the Homeworld ship on its own. 8XM continued to press buttons, trying to find the door. She knew she had to help. The intruders had of course taken notice of her ship leaving and several of them tried to work to close the door. 8XM panicked, jabbing every button, even as the control banner beeped angrily at her. Finally she located the door and it suddenly burst open above her. 

8XM popped out of the open door, jumping out with her whips at the ready. She hopped off the ship and the soldiers immediately tried to swarm her. They were unable to get the door to the docking bay closed in time, though. The ship’s door closed again and it rumbled, it’s image shifting as it’s hyper drive kicked in. It went shooting out of the open door and into space. It stirred up a harsh wind in the process. Along with the shifted floor, 8XM found it difficult to even stand properly, let alone fight. But she managed to get a few good hits in, regardless. She felt like something beyond herself had taken hold. Her body was moving like it knew what to do, even as her mind was blank.

She dodged several attacks and went sliding down between the legs of one very surprised soldier. 8XM stood up, wrapping her whips around one of the ships and lifting it. She sent it flying towards the soldiers and it came down on several of them, displacing smoke. However, a few of them evaded it and they charged through the smoke towards her. 8XM turned and swung, grabbing another ship and flinging it. And then another. 

“Would someone please capture her?!” Tourmaline demanded, looking annoyed. 

Once she’d run out of things to throw, 8XM tried to use her whips directly, but they had little impact on the advancing soldiers. They finally managed to corner her in the docking bay and several of them grabbed her, lifting her off the floor while she struggled. Within moments, her weapon had been taken from her and it vanished. Her arms were forced behind her and she was placed in some kind of restraints that kept her arms in place. 

Tourmaline walked past her as the soldiers held her and 8XM glared daggers at her as she passed. Tourmaline ignored her. “Someone get the scanners on that ship, see if anyone else tried to make a daring escape.”

“No gems inside,” one of the soldiers said, checking a holographic screen that had come out from a device on her arm. “No organic life, either. It’s empty.”

“Leave it, then…” Tourmaline muttered. She turned to face 8XM. “What a troublesome gem you’ve been, so far…” She tucked her hands behind her back and leaned down to look at her. “Maybe another run through Nonresistance will teach you some manners.” 

8XM tried to keep her expression hard rather than fearful. 

“Or maybe I should save that one for your miserable excuse for an Agate,” Tourmaline mused. “Well, no matter. We’ll think of something to do with you.”

The group left the docking bay and began making their way into the bowels of the Human Zoo. Along the way, Tourmaline activated the power in each location. 8XM made a couple attempts to wretch herself free, but it was no use. She’d finally given up and simply walked, flanked by soldiers. As they entered each area of the ship, several soldiers stayed behind to keep the zoo quartzes in line.

Holly Blue Agate was still sitting in the dark when she heard a commotion on the other side of the door. She got to her feet, facing the door. The power returned to her room and a second later, her door slid open. Standing in the doorway was Tourmaline. In the background, Holly could see the soldiers. One of them was keeping 8XJ subdued by pointing a destabilizer at her.

With a grin, Tourmaline stepped over the threshold and Holly stepped back. 

“Tourmaline! You’re taking this too far!” Holly cried. “Let me speak with Blue Diamond, personally. I know I can reason with her!”

“Blue Diamond is attending to some business off Homeworld,” Tourmaline responded, calmly. “I’m acting in her place.” She looked around the room. “Yes, I think this arrangement will do just fine. I’m a guest, Holly. You don’t mind giving up your room, do you?” She smirked. 

“Y-you can’t just storm the Human Zoo and expect me to take it!” Holly exclaimed. Some of the soldiers filed into the room. One of them advanced on Holly. She took another step back, preparing to draw her weapon from the gem on the back of her head. She felt another soldier grip her arm roughly when she did so and twist, causing her to cry out in pain. Her arm was forced behind her back, along with her other one and the soldier in front of her kneed her swiftly in the stomach. 

Holly’s eyes went wide and then she coughed and crumpled to her knees. She heard Jay call her name, but she didn’t react to it. 

–

It was only a matter of hours before the ship, programmed to lock onto gems, had entered the earth’s atmosphere and began its descent. Steven spotted it first, but it only took a few minutes for Garnet, Pearl and himself to gather on the beach, waiting in anticipation. The ship missed the landing, hitting the ocean instead. The group waded into the water, approaching the ship that was bobbing on the waves.

Garnet hopped up onto the ship and wretched the door open with some effort. She dropped inside the ship while Steven and Pearl watched, standing in the water. Pearl could feel Steven clutching her hand in his and she squeezed back. But then Garnet poked her head back out of the ship and hoisted herself out. “She’s not here…” 

“What?” Pearl gasped. “How could she not be there?” 

“Not only that, it looks like the laser was activated shortly before taking off…” Garnet added. 

Steven squeezed Pearl’s arm. “Attacked?” he asked, worriedly. 

“It’s possible…” Garnet answered. 

“Someone got her before she could escape…” Pearl whispered. She put a hand over her mouth. “Oh, no…” 

“W-wait! That might not be it!” Steven protested. He could feel Pearl trembling. “Let’s just go back to the Kindergarten and try to call them! Maybe there’s an explanation. Maybe this is just a test run!”

–

It kept ringing and ringing from the Kindergarten computer. Pearl stood at the control panel, as tense as she’d been the moment she approached it, almost an hour ago. Once the call ended, she tried to put it through again. Garnet and Steven were behind her, feeling their hope slowly dwindling. Finally it was Garnet who stepped forward, placing a gentle hand on Pearl’s shoulder. Pearl trembled, bowing her head as the screen went blank, informing her once again that the call hadn’t been answered. 

“Pearl,” Garnet spoke. “We have to assume something’s happened. We don’t yet know what, but let’s just move on from this, now… Something’s happened. Amethyst isn’t coming home to us.” 

Pearl nodded, numbly. She turned from the screen, exhaling slowly and trying to keep her wits about her. “You’re right…” 

“But we have a ship. She was able to get a ship to us, at least,” Garnet said. 

“We rescue her?” Steven asked, perking up. 

Garnet smiled at him. “We can’t leave her behind.”

“Definitely not,” Pearl agreed, almost laughing at how simple of a decision it was. She turned to face Steven and Garnet. “Are we ready to go, right now? The sooner the better.”

“I’m ready!” Steven declared.

“Me too,” Garnet said, nodding. “Let’s go get our Amethyst back.”


	11. Closer

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It didn't take long to post here, but it's been a long time coming for Chapter 11. The hardest part is coming up with titles for these.

After dealing with her charges, Holly dismissed them and they scattered like wounded dogs. Holly crossed her arms over her chest with a scowl. She had her work cut out for her. These gems were raw, particularly the Betas. And many of them were dealing with shell shock. She knew it wasn't an ideal situation for any of them. The Prime and Beta quartzes were soldiers, not caretakers. And Holly wasn't a general. Her "training" session had been brief, carried out by a dismissive Agate who encouraged her to be violent as much as possible. 

"An Agate terrifies, after all," she said with a wink. Holly could only grimace and nod, mutely.

She knew the mantra, she knew the expectations. She knew it the second she'd come out of the ground, ready to assert her dominance over any lesser gems. She couldn't help the way she felt. She'd been made for it, and therefore was it so terrible to also admit that she liked doing it? Taking her frustrations out on others felt good. And there was plenty to be frustrated about. 

It felt a lot like being swept under the rug, to Holly. She walked alone down the corridor, hands tucked behind her back, eyes lowered in thought. It was no secret to any of the gems under Blue Diamond that their diamond wasn't in a good place, mentally. She was beside herself with grief and her leadership had suffered. If she'd been in her right mind, she would've likely found a better use for the quartzes that had once been Pink Diamond's. The human zoo was a pointless station, in Holly's private view. It was Blue Diamond's attempt to preserve Pink's legacy. It mattered to Blue, so it mattered to Holly, but it still felt pointless to her. Holly felt uneasy with them, too. The quartzes. Not because they'd seen battle, but because they were Pink Diamond's earth gems. Pink Diamond's Rose Quartzes had turned out faulty. Who was to say the others weren't similar? Perhaps there was something in the rock on earth that made gems there rebellious. Holly didn't really know what she was dealing with at all. She felt like she'd been shelved, along with the others, put somewhere to carry out meaningless work until they were all needed for their real purpose. If it ever came. 

Holly sighed, miserably. It was looking like a long stretch of loneliness and isolation ahead of her. Trapped on some outpost in some backwater corner of the galaxy, with a bunch of chuckling morons. Watching over a group of idiotic humans. That was another thing. Holly didn't care one bit about the earth and the humans didn't interest her in the slightest. Perhaps if she liked humans, or at least knew about them, she could take some pride in what they were doing. With that in mind, she headed in the direction of her room, thinking she'd read up on the creatures they were caring for. Maybe they had something unique to their species, that would at least make them interesting. 

She came around the corner, nearly colliding with an Amethyst in her way. Holly took a step back, feeling her anger rise up. She almost told her off, but something stopped her. It was the Amethyst she'd dismissed, earlier. Oh, what was her name? It was on the tip of Holly's tongue. 8XL? 8XH? 8XJ? The Amethyst in question didn't stop to chat. She averted her eyes from Holly and tried to step past her. "Sorry, Holly Blue Agate," she murmured. Holly reached out, gripping her arm to stop her. The hold wasn't rough and the Amethyst could've slipped away if she'd wanted to. But she stopped and raised her eyes, giving Holly a quizzical look.

Holly closed her eyes and cleared her throat. "I'll do my best to remember all your names, eventually... but if you please, what is it they call you?" 

"Uh, I'm 8XJ," the Amethyst answered.

"8XJ," Holly said, exhaling. "Alright. I'll try to remember that." 

The two of them stood in the hall, neither sure of what to do. Holly had stopped her, so she felt like she had to say something. She knew what she wanted to say, but she didn't know how it would be received. She was their Agate, so it was her duty to check in with them. A mopey amethyst was of no use to her, or anyone. "Are you..." Holly began. She took a breath, then her eyes hardened. "Never mind. Go on, go... make yourself useful." She turned from 8XJ. 

"I'm okay, if that's what you were gonna ask," 8XJ called to her. That stopped Holly cold once more. She glanced over her shoulder before she turned herself to face her. 8XJ smiled, awkwardly. "I know you hate being here, it's kind of obvious."

"8XJ..." Holly began, somewhat awkwardly. She didn't want to come off as soft, but she knew leadership was a balancing act. If she went too hard, they'd only hate her and push back against her. There had to be times, maybe... when it was alright to be... if not kind, then at least less aggressive. She didn't know how she was going to manage it. She could do one extreme or the other, but to flip flop between the two... she was going to burn out. Holly sighed. "That Amethyst that you left behind..." She saw grief seize 8XJ and the Amethyst looked away from her, gritting her teeth. Holly did her best not to roll her eyes. Amethysts were strange. They were attached to each other in a way other gems didn't understand. Holly had never felt any sort of closeness with her fellow Agates. But because Holly had never known or loved another gem to the point of missing them so terribly, she couldn't relate to 8XJ's pain. "The others were right. She probably was just a dud. I've seen it, before... every so often, something goes wrong in the growing process and the gem never emerges. It's just... the natural way, sometimes." 

"I guess, yeah..." 8XJ relented, feebly. 

"I'm sure that she isn't going to come out and be alone," Holly said, speaking softly. "Don't let it trouble you. She's not in any pain."

8XJ nodded, pressing her lips together into a thin line. "Y-yeah, you're probably right..." she agreed. "Th-thanks, Holly... Er... Holly Blue Agate."

"Listen..." Holly continued. She'd barely been with the quartzes more than a few hours and she already felt like she was crossing a line. But she persisted. "The way it is here... it's nothing personal."

"I know," 8XJ answered. "We all know that." And she smiled again.

"Okay..." Holly said with a nod. "As long as you... know."

Holly walked away, telling herself she hadn't done anything except try and reach out to the amethyst as a way to improve her work capacity. She didn't want her moping, slowing things down. That was all it was. But something about the way she smiled had made Holly feel... odd. Satisfied, was the word she settled on. Satisfaction for cheering up an Amethyst? She wanted to dismiss it, but she couldn't seem to. 

From that moment on, Holly remembered 8XJ's name the easiest. From there, their relationship developed into... something. Not a friendship, but something. It was something that Holly hadn't realized had become important to her. Not until the guards had dragged 8XJ off and Holly heard herself say her name with such concern and fear. Her first thought was that they were going to shatter 8XJ and it terrified her. Her quartzes were hers. She was possessive of them, in a way. She didn't take kindly to other gems handling them and hurting them. But then Tourmaline stepped in front of Holly's view, blocking any sight of 8XJ. "Holly Blue, I think it's time we had a little sit down. Did some catching up. It's been so long." Tourmaline grinned and leaned down, cradling Holly's jaw in her hand, lifting her head with some roughness to have their eyes meet. Holly held the gaze but she made sure she was glaring absolute daggers at the other gem. 

"Tourmaline, I've always wanted to tell you... that I hate you and I think you're a smug little bitch," Holly said between grit teeth.

"My, my," Tourmaline fretted, letting go of Holly's face. "So the gloves are coming off now, are they?"

"Blue Diamond is never going to forgive you for this," Holly seethed. Tourmaline laughed. 

"You and I both know that Blue Diamond isn't fit to lead us any longer," Tourmaline answered. Holly scoffed. 

"Oh, and you think you're doing any better?"

"I'm already doing a much better job," Tourmaline replied. "I found a traitor and a Human Zoo that's poorly managed. An Agate that's covering up the truth from her Diamond, and having inappropriate relations with her Amethyst."

Holly didn't deny any of it. There was no point. But she continued to glower, to Tourmaline's amusement. Holly spoke again, her voice low. "Don't hurt them..." 

"Excuse me?" Tourmaline asked.

"The Quartzes... don't hurt them... I'm responsible for all of this. They're..." She swallowed. "They're good gems, they were only doing what they were told. They did exactly what they were supposed to do. Listen to their Agate. It's not their fault that my instructions were bad."

"Is that so?" Tourmaline raised an eyebrow. 

"Yes!" Holly said, forcefully. "They're idiots. They'd never be able to do anything, themselves. Do what you want to me, but don't hurt them... please..." 

Interest flashed in Tourmaline's eyes and she smirked, devilishly. "Really."

"Anything you want!"

“I do miss the way we used to play together, Holly Blue,” Tourmaline admitted, placing a hand on her own cheek and looking exaggeratedly forlorn. 

“I’m all yours!” Holly said, impatiently. “Just please-“

“Oh, alright,” Tourmaline sighed. “But I’ll put them in a time-out for a while before they can rejoin their fellow gems. Despite the fact that they’ve been following orders, they’ve still been very bad. But I’ll punish their Agate, instead. You're right, it makes more sense.”

“Thank you...” Holly sighed, relieved. She wouldn't call Tourmaline an honorable gem by any means, but it was as much as Holly could do for 8XJ, 8XM and the others at the moment. She only hoped that Tourmaline would be satisfied with her, and would leave the others alone.

\--

Sharky was curtly "escorted" to her room by two quartz soldiers that dwarfed her in size. When the door opened, she could see several Amethysts and Betas cowering in their cubbies. Sharky was pushed against her back and she stumbled into the room. The door closed and locked behind her before she could turn around. In frustration, she aimed a kick at the closed door, but just once. 

"What's going on out there?" Skinny demanded as she approached Sharky from behind. 

"Some gem named Tourmaline is here, and she brought a bunch of goons with her," Sharky answered through grit teeth. 

There were murmurs among the quartzes behind her.

"8XM?" someone asked.

"They caught her. Jay, too. And Holly." It was already clear that none of them were present in the room with them, which had her worried. 

"I wonder how the humans are doing without power..." Chip murmured. 

"Scared shitless I'm sure, but probably fine otherwise," Sharky said, gruffly. "We gotta think about ourselves right now."

"What'dyou suggest?" Skinny asked, somewhat sarcastically. "We're stuck here. The whole zoo is on lockdown. The halls are swarming with those jacked up quartzes. You know what I think?" She scowled. "I think we shouldn't have stuck our necks out for 8XM..."

There were a few voices agreeing with her, reluctantly. Sharky gave them a hard glare. "Oh yeah, is that how we are?" she asked, directing the question not just to Skinny but to the group as a whole. "One of us is in trouble and we all just turn our backs on her?"

"8XM isn't one of us," someone said. No one spoke out against it. 

Sharky's eyes hardened. "There wasn't any question before. So what changed?"

Silence followed. 

"What, just because we might actually have to do more than just say we're on her side?" Sharky demanded. "What if it was Jay? Or me? Or you, Skinny? We'd all have her back, wouldn't we?" 

"But 8XM isn't the same! She's from Earth!" a Jasper spoke out.

"So are we!" Sharky shot back. 

"She's one of the gems from the rebellion..." 

"It doesn't matter," Sharky answered. "She didn't want to be here. She didn't do any of this on purpose. And she didn't come out later than us because she wanted to. When she came here, you all bonded with her right away. So don't give me that crap about her not being one of us. Or anyone who thinks she isn't, really thinks that... come over here and say it to me." 

No one budged.

"What do we do, then?" Skinny asked, her voice softer and her eyes averted in shame. 

"We've got to get 8XM off this outpost and back with her family," Sharky replied. "And we've got to get this smug bitch Tourmaline out of our zoo."

\-- 

After an interrogation that felt like it stretched on for eons, Jay was finally released into a holding cell. She turned around as the field came up, keeping her inside. The soldiers who had pushed her inside wordlessly turned from the cell and left her alone. Jay waited a moment, but nothing else happened. Eventually she went to the far wall of the cell and sat down with her back against it. Without the usual hum of power coursing through the zoo, the entire structure seemed to amplify every other sound with empty echoes. It felt a bit tomb-like, to her. She couldn't immediately see if there were other gems around her in the cells, but she did eventually hear movement from somewhere out of her view. 

"Who's there?" Jay called.

"It's me," came a small voice, unmistakably 8XM. Jay got to her feet in a hurry, not that she could do much from where she was. 

"Where are you? Can you see me?" she asked. 

"No, I'm in a cell..." 8XM answered. 

"Are you hurt?" 

"Nah. Are you?"

"No, not really. Do you see anyone else? Or did you before?" 

"I didn't see anyone else," 8XM responded. "Where were you?"

"Being interrogated," Jay answered with a sigh. "What a slog that was. What about you? Have you just been in here the whole time?" 

"Yeah, no one asked me anything. I've just been sitting here, basically. What were they interrogating you about?" 

"Ah, mostly about you... how stuff is being run here. A lot of what I think about Holly and whether or not she's a good Agate, for some reason." Jay sighed. 8XM was safe, at least, but she didn't know how long either of them would be unharmed or what was planned for them. They were vulnerable where they were. It would be impossible to get 8XM back to earth now that they were all under surveillance. Although Jay wasn't typically the type to give into hopelessness, she could feel it beginning to settle over her. She went back to her place against the wall, dropping back down into a sitting position once more. All they could do was wait. 

"This is my fault, Jay..." 8XM muttered, miserably.

"It's not," Jay answered. "You didn't ask for any of this to happen, M..."

"I should've just stayed, though," 8XM continued. In her cell, she was unintentionally mirroring Jay's position, sitting with her back against the wall as well. She knew Jay was nearby, but she couldn't see her. But she was glad she wasn't alone anymore. "I was happy here, with all of you guys. I really was. I should've just been okay with being here." 

"Aw c'mon, M," Jay chuckled, feeling herself smile just a bit. "I saw the way you lit up when you were talking to the gems on earth. Even without your memories, you know that's where you really belong."

"Ugh, I could've gone, too... but I didn't want to leave you guys, not when you were being attacked! I was in the ship, I could've gone to Earth right then, but I had to help. I had to!"

Jay was silent a moment. "And the ship?" she asked.

"It went without me, they didn't close the doors in time," 8XM answered, somewhat dismissively. 

"So it's probably landed on earth, by now."

"Yeah, I guess."

Jay couldn't fight the grin that began to creep on her face. "Then they're coming!"

"Who is?"

"Them! Your friends! The Crystal Gems!" Jay exclaimed, excitedly. "They've got a ship, now!"

"They shouldn't come..." 8XM said, worriedly. "It's dangerous here."

"I doubt that'll stop them. You could still get out of here! There's no way they're gonna get that ship and NOT take it right back here to rescue you!"

"You really think they'd do that...?"

"No doubt," Jay answered, firmly. "There's still hope!"

"We don't know if they're coming, though," 8XM mumbled, dejectedly. "Maybe they'll say I've been too much trouble and they won't."

"Look how much they've done for you already, though!" Jay continued, trying to raise 8XM's spirits. "They hacked the Prime Kindergarten to call you! They're using telepathy or something to contact you! They want you home with them..." 

"I don't even know what home is."

"Oh come on, M!" Jay cried, exasperated. "Look, I know it looks bad right now, but you have to keep your chin up, okay?"

"What about you guys? What'll happen to you?" 8XM asked, sadly. 

"We'll be okay."

"But I can't just leave you all when you're in trouble!"

"You let us handle the other stuff. Getting you back to earth is what's the most important. The rest of us... we'll be fine. We'll deal with it. They're not gonna put us out of commission over this, trust me. Home World... they talk a big game, but they're actually scared to death of losing resources."

"Resources like us," 8XM clarified. 

"Exactly. That's why they did all of this. And Blue Diamond... she'd never disassemble the Human Zoo. And it'd be such a headache for everyone to try and retrain a whole bunch of new gems to work here, at this point. What other gems are gonna have five thousand years of human experience, right?" 

8XM smiled a little. "Well, you make a good point."

"Trust me, it's all gonna be fine," Jay insisted. "This is all gonna blow over. This stuff just happens around here, sometimes. We're so remote so every so often some gems from Home World will come over and strut around for a while, just to make sure we stay in line. Inspections and stuff. But it's all just for show, really. I mean, it's never gotten to this point, but this isn't the first time someone from Home World has come over here to try and intimidate us."

"Yeah...?" 8XM asked, sounding faintly hopeful. 

"I promise," Jay assured her. "The gem who is in the most danger here is you, not any of us. So you're the one who needs to leave here."

8XM was quiet for a few moments as she thought. "And Holly?" she asked. 

Jay was quiet as well. She didn't know where Holly was. Or what they were doing to her. Jay took a deep breath. "Holly will... probably be reassigned," Jay decided, finally. It seemed like the most optimistic view to take, but she wasn't entirely convinced that even Holly was in any real danger of being shattered. "They'll just stick us with another Agate. And in a few weeks, we won't even notice a difference..." 

"You won't miss her?" 8XM asked. 

Jay snorted. "Why would I miss Holly?" she asked. "She's just our Agate. She's not even the first one we've had, you know."

"I guess. And well, she's kinda mean to you guys, too," 8XM added. 

"Yeah... but I don't think anyone really cares about that," Jay replied, shrugging. "None of us hold it against her."

"Why not?"

"It's just her job, I dunno... she's supposed to be like that. It's kind of annoying sometimes, but none of us are ever really hurt, you know? I guess something like that on Earth would look pretty bad, huh?"

"Heh... I don't really know what Earth is like," 8XM answered. "Hmm... Is it weird of me to say that I kind of like Holly?" 

Jay laughed. "She uh, probably wouldn't like you saying that." 

8XM snickered. "Yeah, prob'ly not. But I do kinda like her... even if she was just helping for her own reasons. I dunno... I'm probably not good at reading people. So I'm probably wrong about it. But it just kinda feels like..." 

Jay was curious about 8XM's insight. "Go on," she encouraged. "It feels like what?"

"I dunno, like she's... conflicted about it?" 8XM offered. She laughed. "That sounds stupid, right? I don't even really know Holly. She'd probably smack me if she heard me talking about her like that." 

"Heh... maybe," Jay answered. "But..." She mused over it. "Maybe she is. I don't know. She's tough to crack. I think Holly's the type that no matter how she feels inside, she would always keep up appearances. There's only really been a few times where I've ever seen her where I think 'maybe this isn't the real Holly, maybe she's just acting out a role' and there's actually a possibly nice or at least decent gem under all the yelling and punching." Jay lowered her gaze to the floor and she smiled, fondly. "And I like that gem, when I see her..." 8XM noticed Jay's voice had softened. 

"D'you like her a looot?" 8XM teased. 

Jay felt herself blush. "I don't know what you mean."

"Yes you do!" 8XM insisted. "Don't lie to me, Jay! We may die, let's share our feelings!"

Jay rolled her eyes, scoffing. "We're not going to die."

"Eight Ex Jaaaaaaayyyyyy," 8XM whined, stretching out the last part so that it grated on Jay's nerves. 

"Okay, you want the truth?" Jay asked. "The truth is that I don't know. Even if I was madly in love with Holly..." It felt strange to say such a thing, even if it was only meant as a for instance. It felt forbidden. "And even if she felt the same. And neither of those things are true, by the way. But if she did... It wouldn't matter. That kind of stuff. Love and relationships... they're frowned upon. It's not like how it was on Earth where you could go off somewhere and frolic together. We're in the Human Zoo. There's nowhere to go. There's no space for something like that to develop, you know?" 

"Oh..." 8XM sounded disappointed. 

"Everything is structured here, so that 'canoodling' opportunities are kept to a minimum," Jay explained. "I mean, some of us still do, but it's hard. And Holly's got it worst of all. Anything that happens at the Zoo, even if it wasn't her fault, it's her responsibility. She's in charge. There's also a huge power imbalance between us. It would never be equal... A relationship between me and her would never be real."

"Sounds like you've thought about it already," 8XM observed. 

"Heh. Yeah... maybe. When I was newer and more naive."

They were interrupted by a loud thud against the wall that caused both of them to jump. 

"That's enough talking, now! We're gonna move you down, runt."One of the quartz soldiers stepped in front of 8XM's cell and released the shield. 8XM was surprised but she tried to make a run for it, hoping her smaller size might make her harder to catch. She shot down between the quartz's legs and into the corridor where she could see Jay in her cell, staring with wide eyes. Jay got to her feet. 

"Hey, get back here!" the quartz exclaimed. 

8XM hesitated, looking at Jay in the cell. "Just go, M!" Jay cried. "Run! Get out of here!"

8XM's attention went to the quartz that was trying to grab for her and she managed to narrowly avoid being scooped up in her arms. There were actually three of them, and all of them were bearing down on her, trying to herd her into a cell. 8XM could hear Jay's voice calling for her to get away while one of the soldiers turned and told her to be quiet. 8XM turned and took off running. She didn't know where she was running to, but she just pumped her short legs as hard as she could while two quartzes lumbered after her, calling for her to stop. She couldn't find anything she could use to push into their path and hopefully slow them down. All she could hope for was that she might open up enough space between them that she could lose them, somehow. 

She finally skidded around a corner, darting out of sight of the quartzes for a split second. In that moment, as when she was fighting, 8XM's instincts took over. 

The two quartzes came around the corner only a few seconds afterwards and they stopped abruptly, swiveling their heads back and forth, searching for the Amethyst they'd been chasing. She'd completely vanished. The two quartzes walked through the corridor, looking for her, but it wasn't clear where she'd gone. 

"Tourmaline isn't gonna like this..." one of them muttered. Her companion scowled and punched her arm. 

"This outpost is totally locked down, she's not getting out of here. We don't tell Tourmaline she got out... we'll tell the others to keep a look out for her. She can't hide for long." 

8XM was nearby and in plain sight of the quartzes if either of them happened to look in the place she was huddled. But they didn't. She'd shape shifted into a mouse and was pressing herself tightly against a door frame for some meager cover. She watched warily as the quartzes walked past her. She tensed up when they passed by her a second time, heading back to the holding cell corridor. But eventually they'd gone and 8XM was alone. She moved carefully, creeping out from her hiding spot, her belly near the floor as she eyed the hallway around her for any signs of other gems, friend or foe. There were none. She returned to her normal form. She'd never shape shifted in her memory and she didn't exactly know what form she'd taken, but somehow she'd known to do it.

Jay was still in her cell and 8XM wanted to go back and free her. But she hadn't realized that there had been guards there all along. Even shape shifted, it would be impossible. She remembered Jay's words, about how things were at the zoo, and how confident she seemed that none of them were in any real danger. Still, 8XM hated the thought that the last time she'd see 8XJ would be in a cell. She knew she had to make sure that Jay was truly safe before she left. The quartzes also seemed fairly confident that she wouldn't be able to leave the Human Zoo while it was locked up. Perhaps she hadn't done anything except put herself into a larger cell. 

Not sure what to do, 8XM began to run again. She felt like she needed to stay on the move. Her first thought was to try and locate some of the other zoo quartzes. From there, she wasn't sure.

\--

The ship had slowed to nearly a crawl as it got within sight of the Human Zoo. Pearl, sitting at the control panel, leaned forward as she looked through the large window. Steven gripped the back of her chair. Garnet stood on the other side of her, expressionless, but steeling herself. The outpost was dark and shadowy. It almost had a ghostly appearance. It also became obvious as they got closer, that the shield that covered the entrance to the docking bay had been replaced with a door, which was currently closed, blocking any ships from entering. Pearl slowly circled the ship around the structure, scanning for an entry point. But it was locked up tight. 

"It almost looks... abandoned," Steven commented, uneasily. 

"There's no way..." Pearl whispered. Her gaze hardened. Finally, she dropped the ship below the Human Zoo and let it hover beneath it. She turned to Steven in her chair. "I didn't anticipate having to do a space walk," Pearl admitted. "You don't have a suit."

"That's okay!" Steven assured her. He stood back from the chair, holding his arms out straight on either side of him. He formed a pink bubble around himself, concentrated, and then with some effort, managed to shrink it down so that it was just around his head. Garnet and Pearl watched, impressed. 

"Good job, Steven," Garnet praised, grinning at him. "You're getting so good at controlling your powers." 

Steven blushed and waved her off. "Aw, shucks..." He was audible, but his voice was muffled inside the bubble. 

"Well, that solves one problem, at least..." Pearl sighed. She got up from the captain's chair. "But there's still the matter of getting inside. We'll enter in through the base of the containment area." She turned to one of the screens, swiping her hand across it. An image of the Human Zoo's structure came up, showing it as a black shape with a white outline. She indicated on the screen where they were. "It's the easiest way in, and with any luck, we won't draw attention to ourselves. At least not immediately..."

Steven looked worried. "But the humans are in that part, aren't they? We won't hurt them will we?" 

Garnet stepped forward and placed a hand on Steven's head. "Not to worry, Steven. We won't harm them." 

Pearl had a hard, determined expression. "We'll try not to, anyway."

Steven looked uneasy. Pearl turned and walked to the back of the ship and Garnet and Steven watched her. Pearl had them armed to the teeth, which was unusual for her. "Garnet, armor..." She picked up a suit of armor and carried it over to Garnet, who stood and let Pearl outfit her in it. Steven watched. 

"This feels a bit excessive," Steven said. "The gems there are nice, aren't they?"

"It's necessary," Pearl answered in a clipped voice. "We can't... we shouldn't be trying to reason with these gems. Not after what they did." She withdrew a rapier from inside her gem, then a second one, holding one in each hand. "This isn't just about Amethyst. This is about all of us. How Homeworld thinks it's okay to use and experiment on gems who were part of the rebellion. I'm sick of it. They need to be taught a lesson."

"Pearl..." Garnet spoke, uneasily. "This isn't the war. We're going in, getting Amethyst, and getting out. Nothing else. We stick to that plan."

"Of course," Pearl said, coolly. "But if someone gets in my way..." She held up one of her swords and smiled down at it. "I'm not really in a mood to be reasoned with."

Steven shot Garnet a worried look, but Garnet was putting on her helmet to complete the armor. "Okay, Garnet has armor... I've got my shield... but what about you, Pearl?" Steven asked. 

"It'll slow me down," Pearl answered, distractedly. She slipped a pack on her back. "I don't need anything. No one will lay a hand on me."

"Okay..." Steven said, nervously. 

Pearl opened the top hatch of the ship and she helped Steven out onto the outside of it. Garnet followed. Pearl kept a hand on Steven. She knew his body wasn't affected by gravity in the same way, and she didn't want to risk him floating off into space. It would slow them all down. Directly above them was the containment area of the Human Zoo. They were standing almost directly under the point. Pearl handed Steven off to Garnet so she could use her spear and aim an energy beam. She shot a few times and then stood back, putting her spear away. She held out her hand to Steven and he took it. Garnet stepped forward and Pearl eased Steven and herself back. Garnet landed a firm, direct punch into the weakened material, and it bent but didn't break. With a grunt, Garnet tried a few more times. 

"It's going to give," Garnet said. "Just... one more..." She wound up and hit the spot a final time. Finally it gave way and she punched a neat hole into the very tip of the structure. She grabbed the edges with her hands and pushed it open wide enough to get herself in. She swung up into the containment area. It was dark inside, but a quick scan around made it clear they were safe and hadn't been detected. She reached through the hole with both arms outstretched. Pearl lifted Steven up and Garnet took him, helping him inside. Pearl hoisted herself in, last and crouched on the floor next to the hole. She stood slowly to her full height, unsheathing her swords and looking around. She turned on her gem light to give them a better view of things. 

"We must be right underneath the human zoo itself," Pearl whispered. 

Steven licked both his hands and slapped them down against the hole in the floor and it slowly sealed back up. Once that was taken care off, he popped the bubble around his head. The three of them stood, listening. What they heard was unsettling. It was dead silent within the containment area. 

"They don't have any power..." Garnet muttered. 

"Do you think the humans are okay?" Steven asked, suddenly worried for them. Pearl gave him a stern look. 

"We're not here for the humans, Steven..." Pearl informed him. 

"I... I know, but what if they're in trouble, too?"

"It doesn't matter!" Pearl snapped. "We can't save everyone!"

"Pearl!" Garnet barked. "Stop it. Steven's right. We're going to be passing right up through their habitat. We should check on them, at the very least."

Pearl sighed in frustration. "Okay..." she relented. "You two go and check... I can meet you on the upper level."

"But Pearl-!" Steven cried in protest. 

Garnet regarded Pearl with a hard expression. But she gave in. "Fine," she agreed. Steven looked up at her but Garnet ignored his gaze. "Don't do anything reckless, Pearl..."

"I'll be fine," Pearl replied. She was already turning and heading off into the darkness. 

"Be careful!" Steven called to her back as she retreated. She didn't respond and within a few moments, she was out of sight and out of hearing range. 

"We can't waste any more time," Garnet said to Steven. He nodded. The two of them headed off in the opposite direction that Pearl had gone. 

Garnet and Steven entered into the habitat through an entrance at the bottom of the pool. Steven surfaced first with a gasp, followed by Garnet. Steven took a few breaths. "Well, at least there's air in here," he said to Garnet with a bright smile. "That's good, right?" 

"Absolutely," Garnet agreed. They headed to the shore. The habitat was darker than Steven had seen it, even when it was supposed to be "night". Everything was dark and shadowy. The trees were simply black, irregular shapes. The illusion of sky had disappeared and along the walls and ceiling, there was only the faint, empty blackness of space. Garnet and Steven walked among the trees, looking for signs of life. Much like when they first arrived, it was very quiet. It was also cold. Not cold to the point of being unbearable or dangerous, but certainly colder than Steven remembered it being, before. The air in the habitat had been humid and warm, very similar to how he imagined it felt in the tropics. The temperature was notably cooler, now.

"Hello? Is anyone here?" Steven called, cupping his hands around his mouth. "Do you think they were moved, Garnet?"

"Shh!" Garnet hissed, suddenly. She stopped walking and held an arm out to stop Steven as well. "Listen..." 

Steven went perfectly still and silent. He even held his breath. Faintly but unmistakably, he could hear the sound of weeping. He moved his head left and right, trying to locate the source. Finally he pointed through the shadowy trees. "That way!" he whispered to Garnet. The two of them changed direction and moved through the thick, jungle vegetation. "We're coming to help you!" Steven called as they hurried through. "Stay where you are!" 

Eventually the two of them broke through, into a clearing. Steven squinted but then Garnet held out both her hands, illuminating her gems. The two beams of light revealed that they were standing before the mouth of a cave. And the gem lights illuminated some of the frightened faces of the humans, cowering inside. Steven, who had initially found them unsettling and irritating, only felt concern for them now. He approached the entrance of the cave, moving slowly so as not to scare them further. Many of them were crying and hugging each other. Clearly they'd never dealt with such a situation before, and Steven felt sorry for them. "Hey, it's okay..." he said, gently, as though he were coaxing children. "Are you guys all here? Is everyone okay?" 

"Not... okay!" one of them sobbed. "It's dark!"

"It's dark!" another voice agreed, followed by a chorus of agreement rising up. 

"And Little Voice stopped talking!" another added. Further murmurs of agreement and sobbing. 

"It's gonna be okay," Steven promised. "What happened?"

One of the older men spoke up after shushing some of the voices around him. "We were having our breakfast meal and all of a sudden... darkness."

"And cold!" someone chimed in.

"Everything went silent!"

"We waited, crying out, but the gems never came to help us!"

"We're alone!"

"All alone! Abandoned!"

"Hey!" Steven interjected. "That's not true. We're here. Me and Garnet." He gestured to her. "We're here to help you guys."

"Please help," a woman pleaded. "Bring back the light. Even the stars have burned out."

"We're gonna go and fix this," Steven promised. "If you guys stay here... hang tight... will you be okay?"

"We are not... okay!" 

"I mean..." Steven took a moment to try and recollect his thoughts. "Can you all stay together in here? Keep warm? And wait?"

"Don't abandon us..." 

"I won't!" Steven assured them. "I'll be back. I won't leave you guys. But I have to go, now. I have to find a way to get the light back."

"Please hurry, then..."

"Yes, hurry!"

"Bring back the light!"

"I will!" Steven promised. "I won't forget about all of you, I'll make sure you're safe!" 

The humans bid him and Garnet a tearful goodbye as the pair headed away from the cave, glad the humans were alive, if upset. To them, it probably did seem like their entire world was ending. It was hard to reassure them. It wasn't as though they had prior experiences to recall, where they'd made it through a crisis. "Is it really possible for the power to go out everywhere?" Steven asked Garnet as they walked. 

"It's not impossible, but there are backups to deal with this sort of thing..." Garnet answered. "Whoever shut off the power, did it intentionally." 

"Oh! There it is! The door!" Steven exclaimed as they came up to it. To his surprise, it was slightly open. Not enough to fit through, but there was still a faint crack. It was clear someone had at least tried to pry it open, without much success. Steven came up to the door first, peeking through the crack. He could see a jasper sitting in the hall, across from the door. "Hey!" Steven called to her. She sat up immediately, surprised. Then she hurried to the door. 

"Whoa, are you okay- hey, you're not a human from the zoo!" she exclaimed. "Who are you?"

"I'm Steven!" Steven answered. "I uh... I came from earth. Me and Garnet, here!" He tried to gesture to her but Garnet could barely be seen through the crack. 

"Howdy," Garnet greeted. 

The Jasper had her face pressed right in against the door to look at Steven. "You're from earth? Really?" she asked. "You're here for 8XM, aren't you?" 

"Yeah! What's going on in here? What's happened?" Steven asked. "Here... wait... can you get this door open for me?"

"I tried," the Jasper sighed. She slid her fingers through the opening and grunted as she tried with all her might to pull it open. "I can't get it... I was trying for hours, to check on the humans... Are they okay in there?" 

"They're scared, but they're alright," Steven assured her. "Try again! I'll help. You pull, I'll push!"

The Jasper nodded. "Okay..." she agreed, although she didn't sound convinced it would work.

"Let me help, too," Garnet offered, coming up behind Steven. 

"Yeah! We'll get this!" Steven exclaimed. Pushing and pulling together, the three of them heaved and hoed until the door began to slowly inch open wider and wider. Steven managed to slip through the opening first and he came out on the other side to help the Jasper pull from her end while Garnet got her shoulder through and pushed against the door with more force. It finally opened fully with a sudden jerk, causing all three of them to tumble over onto the floor. Garnet got to her feet first, and she helped Steven up while the Jasper stood on her own. 

"Wow, you guys are strong," she marveled. 

"Any idea what's happening, here?" Steven asked her. The Jasper shook her head. 

"No idea..." she sighed. "I've been stuck in this hallway for the last few hours. The whole place is shut down. Someone killed the power, but I don't know who or why. You guys aren't gonna have much luck getting out of here."

"We're going to try," Garnet said. 

"Yeah, we're going to fix this!" Steven assured her. "Do you think you could go in there and protect the humans? They're really scared and they don't know what to do... I tried to talk them down but I don't know if it worked very well." 

The Jasper nodded. "Yeah. I'll keep 'em safe. Good luck, you two..." The Jasper went through the open door and disappeared into the habitat, leaving Garnet and Steven alone in the hallway. 

\--

Tourmaline's "playtime" had left Holly Blue Agate a great deal more battered than she'd ever remembered being before. But she was kept on the verge of poofing, without the relief that losing her form would bring. Holly was barely aware of her surroundings when she was taken by each arm and essentially dragged down the hallway. She was eventually dropped and she crumbled onto the cold floor of one of the cells where she remained motionless on her side. She heard the field go up, but even if it hadn't, she had no strength to pick herself up off the floor and try and escape. 

The floor was mercifully cool against her sore cheek and that became the only point of focus for Holly. Her eyes were closed, everything else was spinning away from her. 

She was kneeling on the floor, her quartzes on all sides of her as she watched, miserably, as the ship lifted out of the docking bay and left the Human Zoo. On it, two humans, a fusion, an Amethyst and a Pearl. The quartzes waved goodbye to the ship, without making any attempt to stop it. Once it was gone, they left Holly alone without much fanfare. It was then that Holly realized, miserably, that she'd never truly broken any of the quartzes. They hadn't listened to her. They didn't fear her. And she'd pushed as hard on them as she possibly could. She felt exhausted, humiliated and completely burned out. She remained kneeling, long after the others had gone, unsure of what to do. She didn't know where to go from that point. She would go back into that zoo knowing that her power and authority was all an illusion. That the quartzes let her order them around, that none of them were truly afraid of her or respected her at all. 

There was one straggler who lingered in the doorway into the docking bay, although Holly's back was to her. It was 8XJ, watching her from a safe distance. Of course Holly had gotten what she deserved, and she was glad that 8XM and her friends had been able to escape. But she wondered what Holly was feeling at that moment. The other quartzes didn't seem to trouble themselves with worrying about their Agate. At least, not to the extent that Jay felt she did. Jay didn't know why she thought Holly deserved her empathy, when the Agate had so rarely shown her or any of them even a shred of kindness or respect. She already knew the answer, though. 

Jay had a different relationship with Holly, bordering on inappropriate. Holly was different with her than the others. And maybe it was only because Jay was the only one who bothered with Holly and persisted despite always being rebuffed. But she felt like if anyone could comfort her then, it would be her. Jay didn't really want anyone at the Human Zoo to be hurting and upset, even if it was Holly. 

Jay began to approach but stopped as Holly finally picked herself up with a weary sigh. She heard the blue gem mutter, "Did that really just happen..." to herself as she turned. Holly's eyes locked on 8XJ and she looked startled. Jay could see, to her surprise, that there were tears in Holly's eyes. Jay winced and she took an uncertain step forward.

"Holly, it's-" Jay was cut off by a sudden impact against her face as Holly clocked her hard in the cheek and jaw. It was enough to send Jay reeling, although she didn't topple over. Jay righted herself quickly. Holly was glaring daggers at her, her expression as dark as Jay had ever seen it. 

"Don't you dare," Holly warned, her voice low and shaking. She hated that she was on the verge of tears. She hated that 8XJ was there, that it always seemed to be 8XJ who saw her for what she really was. Holly had nothing. No power, no position. She had the pity of a gem that was lower than her. She'd failed as an Agate. And then she was sobbing, and she was hating herself for it and trying desperately not to, but they hitched violently out of her chest anyways. She gasped and sputtered, unable to do anything except turn away from Jay, try to uselessly cover her face with her hands. There was no point in anything anymore. She didn't even have her dignity to try and preserve. She felt Jay's hand against her shoulder and Holly raised both her arms, violently, shrugging her off. "Don't TOUCH me!"

"I'm sorry..." Jay said, recoiling a little. But she was still lingering awfully close and Holly had had more than she could take. She tried to move past Jay and shove her, but Jay angled herself towards Holly instead and Holly came in against her chest. She brought her fists up, as if to fight her, but she just let them rest against Jay's chest. She felt Jay's arms circle her and Holly collapsed against her, sobbing. She kept her arms close to herself and her fists up, making it difficult to be held, but she didn't pull back from Jay. She was shaking. Even her sobs were violent and uncontrolled. She felt ridiculous. She felt sorry. Jay's hands rubbed circles in her back and if Holly had been in a better mental state, she might've found it all comforting. But right then, the contact may as well have burned her. It offended her. She was sobbing in front of an Amethyst. Letting an Amethyst hug her like they were equals. 

Holly had to get a hold of herself. She couldn't let it go on. She abruptly shoved her hands against 8XJ's chest to push her away, and once the gem was standing back, Holly brought out her whip and slashed it on the floor. 

"Leave me alone, 8XJ! Get out of here!" Holly cried. 

"But-"

"GO!" Holly shouted. Her voice was strained and the word broke up into multiple syllables as she fought back another miserable sob. 

8XJ gave her one last look before she hurried away, leaving Holly alone in the docking bay. Holly was relieved when she was alone, because she'd almost been ready then, to just let 8XJ hold her. If it had gone on any longer... If 8XJ had been just a little more stubborn. Holly knew she might've passed a point of no return. 

No, it was wrong. She was already passed that point. Long passed that point. She'd lost all control long ago, and she placed the blame squarely on 8XJ. Every time she'd treated her differently than the others, no doubt 8XJ had gone back to gleefully tell the other quartzes about how soft their Agate truly was. She'd planted the rebellious seeds in their minds, and now it was all blooming, and they were all laughing at her. Talking about her. Knowing they had all the power over her. 

Holly banished those poisonous thoughts. Something stopped her. She knew 8XJ wasn't telling the others about her, about how weak she was. Holly knew 8XJ wasn't like that. She wasn't bad and cruel like she herself was. She could trust her. She had trusted her. 

When Holly felt she was able to, she managed to sneak back into her room without being noticed by anyone. She locked herself in and collapsed on her bed, curling up. She closed her eyes, thinking to herself, how cool the sheets were against her cheek... 

"Holly! HOLLY!" 8XJ cried from her cell. Holly was directly across from her, right in her view, and she hadn't moved for some time. Jay had been trying to get her attention to no avail. But then finally a groan passed Holly's lips and she moved just enough to roll onto her side. She could only vaguely see that 8XJ was in the cell across from hers, staring at her in concern. A weary smile quirked Holly's lips. 

"Surprise, surprise..." she slurred. "I'm at my lowest point, and you're there to see it..." 

"What did they do to you?" 8XJ asked. "Are you okay? No, obviously you're not okay... what am I even asking that, for? What happened?? Did they interrogate you?" 

"8XJ, please shut up..." Holly groaned, closing her eyes and wincing. "My head feels like it's going to split in two." 

8XJ settled somewhat, going silent. But she was still watching her Agate with wide-eyed concern. 

"I just need to rest, a little..." Holly finally said. 

"Who did it?" 

"Tourmaline." 

"I'll take care of her, then."

Holly's eyes snapped open. "Don't be stupid, 8XJ," she said, harshly. She finally lifted herself off the floor, getting into a sitting position although she had her hands on the floor and was leaning on her arms to support herself. 

"What does Tourmaline have against you?" 8XJ asked. 

Holly sighed, unsure if she had enough energy to have such a conversation right at that moment. "I suppose..." she began, somewhat uneasily. "You could call her an old... paramour." She felt some energy return, at least enough to immediately add, "From thousands of years ago, by the way!" 

8XJ was stunned by the admission. "Wait, you two were...?"

"Yes..." Holly muttered.

8XJ's eyes widened. "In love?"

Holly bristled. "NO! Absolutely not!" She calmed down a bit. "Nothing of the sort. It was just... physical, I suppose. We started out together on Blue Diamond's colony, the planet Diane." She didn't really know why she was so freely sharing such information with 8XJ, but it hardly seemed to matter at that point. She'd essentially offered herself to Tourmaline to spare the other gems, and she doubted very much that Tourmaline had already grown bored of "playing" with her. It was simply a rest period she'd been granted. 

"Is that seriously why she's here? Just because of that?" 8XJ pressed

"I don't know," Holly admitted. "We're certainly not fond of each other. But I also suspect that she's just very power hungry. She's acting outside of Blue Diamond's authority, and Blue Diamond will not take that lightly. I'm not sure what her goal is, but she's on borrowed time."

8XJ nodded slowly, taking a minute to absorb it. Then she said, "8XM got free. She took off and I don't think the guards have found her yet. At least, I hope not."

"Good, I hope I never have to look at that little wretch ever again," Holly grumbled. 

"The ship left without her. I bet her friends are coming for her," Jay added. 

"Oh, fantastic," Holly muttered, sarcastically. She brooded for a few silent minutes. 8XJ returned to sitting against the wall, sighing to herself. Holly glanced at her. She thought it odd that they'd be put in cells directly opposite to each other. It seemed like an odd thing to do. But then Holly remembered Tourmaline's accusations against her, one of which was that she was having an inappropriate relationship with 8XJ. And then she began to think the placement of their cells was intentional. Tourmaline was so ridiculous. 

"Are you alright...?" Holly finally asked. 

8XJ looked up at her in bafflement. Then she laughed uneasily. "Heh, what? Did you just ask me if I'm alright?" 

Holly swallowed her automatic response to simply snap at 8XJ and become angry. "Yes," she answered, simply.

8XJ's smile faded. "Yeah... I'm fine," she finally said, uncomfortably. "Nothing happened to me. They asked me a lot of questions and threatened me, but they never actually did anything." 

Holly was relieved. "Good... I'm glad. Tourmaline had better not lay a hand on any of you. I'm the only one who's allowed to do that."

Jay laughed. "I'll take your right hook over hers any day."

"I'm sorry about that." 

"Uh, what?" 

"That I hit you."

"When?" 8XJ asked, beyond confused. 

"That day. When 8XM and her friends came and left..." 

"Oh..." 8XJ had barely remembered it. She certainly hadn't given it much thought, and clearly a great deal less than Holly had. Then she shrugged. "I barely felt it. And it's nothing personal, right?" 

"It was personal," Holly insisted. She sounded embarrassed as she spoke, but determined to say what she needed to, before Tourmaline took her away again. "8XJ... Jay... what you did that day..." She sighed. "I can't believe I'm saying this. I appreciated it..." 

"You did?" 

"Yes... and I hated that I was so moved by it..." Holly frowned, feeling like all this open feeling and emotion was too much for her. She began to withdraw and she leaned against the wall, turning to face away from 8XJ to mask some of her discomfort. "And I just felt like I should say that."

"I shouldn't have like... tried to force you into a hug or anything," 8XJ said, awkwardly. "I was just worried, that's all." 

"You got to see me crying like a little lost Pearl." 

"I didn't tell anyone."

Holly glanced over her shoulder at Jay. "I know you didn't... I appreciate that, too."

\--

Pearl meanwhile had managed to wriggle her way into the ventilation system, although it was a tight fit. It was the only reason she likely hadn't run into anyone else using it. Every gem in the outpost was too large to fit inside. Pearl grunted as she crawled on her belly through the vents. She'd put her swords away for the moment, but she didn't dare let herself be caught unarmed. She held a knife between her teeth. She came to a junction and looked back and forth before she heard faint voices in the vent on her right. She went right, slowing her movements as she heard the voices getting closer and clearer. Eventually, she was right above the speakers and Pearl went silent, listening. 

"I never thought I'd say this, but I wish Holly was here," a gem was saying. Pearl scoffed. 

“Do we know what’s gonna happen, now?” a second voice asked. “Is Tourmaline the new boss?”

“You can’t just come in and be the new boss!”

“Tell that to her goons. Oh, no offense!” They both laughed. 

“Quiet!” a third voice cut in, angrily. 

Pearl couldn’t see into the room she was above, but she’d already lost interst in the conversation. Amethyst wasn’t there. A gem named Tourmaline was apparently responsible. She continued on through the vents. 

After a few more minutes of traveling, the silence was suddenly broken with the sound of rattling, followed by a low hum. Light suddenly began to shine in through the spaces of the vent and Pearl realized that the power had been restored. Following that, there was a voice over a loudspeaker. 

“Attention employees of the human zoo. There will be an important meeting in the great hall in ten minutes. Attendance is mantatory.” 

Pearl heard footsteps shuffling under her and she looked down, peering through a crack. She could just barely see several quartzes making their way through the hallway, presumably towards the meeting place. Pearl waited for them to pass, and then she kicked open a panel from under her and dropped from the ceiling down to the floor. She landed in a crouch and she listened a moment before she stood up straight. She took the knife out of her mouth and put it back in her gem. She retrieved her two swords again, instead. She vaguely remembered where the cells for unruly and uncooperative gems were located and after a quick look around, she determined her approximate location in relation to them. Pearl could make it there in under five minutes if she was fast, but it was a blind corner on every side. She had no way of seeing or anticipating anyone coming around towards her. But Pearl quickly decided it didn't matter. If she was at all capable of making adrenaline, she would blame it on that. She felt numb to the consequences of being caught. She was tired of waiting and she was tired of having Amethyst kept from her. She was going to get what she wanted, and she was completely okay with cutting down any gem or human that dared cross her path. 

With that in mind, Pearl sprinted around the corner with her swords drawn. Luckily, she didn't run into anyone. She continued on. As she ran, her thoughts went back to Amethyst. They'd tried not to waste any time in getting off the planet and heading for the Human Zoo. But again she had to deal with the thought that they were already too late. That Amethyst had been caught trying to escape, and she'd been shattered for it. But Pearl's stubbornness rose up and overpowered that thought. It would only slow her down, thinking that. Amethyst had died once, as far as she'd been concerned only a few days ago. But she'd beaten the odds and survived. And there was no way she was dead, now, after everything. 

Pearl reminded herself, as she neared the place she was headed, that Amethyst didn't remember her. When they met again, she had to be gentle with her and be respectful of that. She couldn't just... latch onto her mouth or something. Not that Pearl thought she'd do anything so shameless, even in the heat of the moment. But it still crossed her mind. 

Pearl rounded the final corner, stumbled, and then pulled back when she realized the entrance to the hallway was being guarded by two quartzes. They weren't from the Human Zoo, if their uniforms were anything to go by. There were only two of them. Pearl could take them. But she did notice that they were both armed with gem destabilizers. If she took a hit, she'd be down in one shot and everything would be over. She had to consider what to do, carefully.

Pearl put her swords away and took a few deep breaths to calm herself. She had to appear harmless. She tried to channel her long-repressed Pearl behaviors. When she stepped out from around the corner again, she did so, meekly. "H-hello?"

The two quartz guards turned, scowling as they faced her. Both of their expressions turned to surprise when they realized they were looking at a pearl. Pearl walked over to them, timid and doe-eyed. "Excuse me?" she squeaked. "I think I'm lost... I need help."

"Whoa, where'd you come from?" one of the quartzes asked. She stooped down a ways to get eye-level with Pearl, who shrank back from her and put her clasped hands up, under her chin. "Hey, it's okay! I'm not gonna hurt you, heh... Who do you belong to? You're not Tourmaline's pearl, are you...?" 

"Everyone went somewhere... I was separated from my owner in the confusion," Pearl said, softly. "I don't know where she went. Can you help me?" 

"Your owner probably went to the great hall..." the quartz said. "I can take you there, it's no problem."

"Hey, we're supposed to be guarding the prisoners, remember?" her companion finally spoke up, gruffly. She eyed Pearl in a way Pearl didn't care for. "I say if her owner was stupid enough to leave her, then she's fair game for anyone who wants her..." 

"Knock it off!" the first quartz scolded, giving her companion an elbow in the stomach. 

Pearl found it all too easy to cling to the first quartz's arm and duck behind her, fearfully. "I'm scared!"

"Don't worry about her, she's just tryin' to scare you. I'll take you, come on. It's not far..." 

"Thank you so much, you're so kind..." Pearl said. She smiled shyly, taking hold of the quartz's hand, which made her blush. 

"You'd better get back here before Tourmaline finds out," the other quartz said as Pearl and the first one started walking off down the hallway. Pearl rounded the corner with her, eyeing the gem destabilizer that was hooked on the quartz's hip, closest to Pearl. Within grabbing distance. She waited until they'd gotten a bit further away and then she suddenly made a grab for it, yanking it off the quartz. She activated it quickly and without a second thought, she jabbed her with it. The quartz guard barely had time to react before her body was poofed, leaving only her gem, which Pearl bubbled to prevent her from regenerating.

"One down..." Pearl said to herself. She returned to the where the second guard was posted. To her surprise, the guard wasn't at her post, but had gone further into the hallway to talk to one of the prisoners. Pearl crept it with her swords drawn and her eyes intense. She was grateful for the distraction. It made her job easier. The prisoner in question wasn't her Amethyst, but it was an Amethyst. She appeared to be taunting the guard, although Pearl had no idea why. 

"You shut up!" the guard warned, glaring through the field at her. 

"Or what? What're you gonna do?" 

"Tourmaline is going to shatter you!"

"I'd like to see her try!"

Pearl came up behind the guard. She was completely visible to the Amethyst in the cell, but the Amethyst didn't even glance at her. The amethyst was distracting the guard for her, she realized. Pearl smiled at her. And then she brought her two swords down, neatly slicing through the guard's body. Her expression changed to shock, and a beat later, she poofed. Pearl grabbed her gem and bubbled it as well. She took the two bubbles in her hands, considering what to do with them. There was a moment, however brief, where Pearl considered setting them both on the floor and shattering them with the hilt of her sword. Instead, she tossed them each into a cell after popping them and activated the field to keep them inside. Then Pearl turned to the amethyst who was being held prisoner. "Thanks," she said. 

"No problem," the amethyst answered with a grin. Pearl turned to the control panel and studied it a moment, trying to bring down the field and release her.

"Are you 8XJ?" Pearl asked. 

"How'd you know?" 

"Amethyst told me she liked you the best, and that you had curly hair..." Pearl answered. She tried to punch in a few codes but nothing worked. "Gem on the arm..." In frustration, she put her sword through the panel and the field flickered and dissolved, freeing 8XJ. She stepped out of the cell, cautiously. 

"Aw, she really said she liked me the best?" 8XJ asked.

“She did,” Pearl confirmed. "Where is she?" Pearl turned around and realized the cell behind her was also occupied. Holly scowled at her and Pearl narrowed her eyes.

"Not here," 8XJ sighed. "She got out and made a run for it, that way..." Jay pointed and then sputtered a protest when Pearl darted off down the corridor without another word. "That Pearl's on a rampage..." She turned her attention back to Holly's cell and started punching the panel to lower the field. Holly watched her. 

"8XJ, stop..."

"What?" 

"Leave me, go find the others," Holly instructed. 

"What? Why??" Jay asked, blinking in confusion. 

"Because I told Tourmaline she could have me if she didn't harm any of you. And if I go back on my word, she'll most certainly go back on hers." 

"But she's crazy!" Jay cried. 

"Listen," Holly said, firmly. "She's had an opportunity to do something to you, 8XM and the others. She hasn't. If I'm gone when she comes back for me, you'll all be fair game. And you do NOT want to be subjected to Tourmaline."

8XJ faltered, unsure of what to do. "Why would you do that?" she finally asked. 

"Oh, stop," Holly said, dismissively. "You already know why. Now go on, get. I'd put my boot in your backside if I could."

"Okay..." Jay said, her voice soft. "You'd better be in one piece when I come back with the others, though..." She headed off in the same direction Pearl had gone, intending to catch up to her and hopefully keep her from doing anything reckless.


	12. Mirrors

The “play room” Tourmaline had used to take out her frustrations on Holly was Holly’s own room, although re-purposed and modified to suit Tourmaline.  
  
Everything Holly had accumulated over the years, which admittedly wasn’t much, had been pushed out of the room and into the hallway. Only the large, circular cushion that could be considered a bed remained. That and the computer, only because it was built-in and not easily removable.  
  
Holly was suspended with her arms above her, her feet not quite able to fully touch the floor. It was a position that left her vulnerable but also incredibly uncomfortable. Tourmaline paced back and forth in front of her, smiling darkly. When she spoke to Holly, it was perversely soft and small, as though she were mimicking the speech of a human child. And every few minutes she’d draw her whip again and lash Holly. Like Holly, Tourmaline’s favored weapon was a whip, although it lacked the electrical charge of her own. Even without that extra touch, it still stung. Holly’s body was immune to electricity, anyways. But she wasn’t immune to pain.  
  
Still, it was no worse than any other physical pain she’d had to endure, either from Tourmaline or other Agates in her life. Tourmaline wasn’t a particularly large or physically powerful gem and even at full-strength, she wasn’t the worse abuse Holly had ever dealt with. She suspected that Tourmaline would tire herself out long before Holly would break. It had always been that way.

 Holly's body jerked and she bit back a cry as another blow landed, leaving a clean blue welt across her skin. She gritted her teeth, holding a breath before violently expelling it in a series of restrained pants. Tourmaline watched her. Holly finally raised her eyes, letting them lock with Tourmaline’s gaze. She didn’t try to mask her hatred of the other gem. There wasn’t any point. Despite everything, Holly managed to grin at Tourmaline.

 “You’re... losing your touch, Tourmaline, dear...” she wheezed.

 Tourmaline’s smile faltered just for a moment, but it was enough to make Holly’s own grin widen.

 “Oh, you may be right,” Tourmaline sighed, looking forlorn. Her tone was as casual and unbothered as if she were speaking to Holly politely, in a normal interaction. She almost sounded apologetic. “I used to make you scream and beg from this, didn't I? Back on Blue’s colony, Diane, remember?”  
  
Holly looked confused. “Of course I remember.”  
  
“You haven’t been back there since we were called away, have you?”  
  
“No,” Holly answered, simply. She’d been made in a kindergarten on an asteroid, but she’d spent most of her formative years on Blue Diamond’s colony during Era-1. Although most lower-status gems were shuttled between assignments, Holly still considered the planet to be like her home. It was where she’d met Tourmaline, though. So it held some mixed feelings for her. After thousands of years and so many technological advances, it was doubtful that the colony Holly remembered still existed anyways.  
  
“We used to have such fun,” Tourmaline reminisced. “Our home…”  
  
“If you can call it that,” Holly answered. Her voice was returning to normal, growing steadier and less wheezy.  
  
“I’ve been back many times,” Tourmaline continued. “After Pink Diamond was tragically shattered, our Diamond really let a lot of her outer colonies go. Resources are spread pretty thin on Diane, but the upside is that it’s almost identical to how we remember it.”  
  
“Is that so?”  
  
“Mmhm. They’ve been appealing to Blue Diamond for a manager for some time. It fell to me to find someone to fill the position and to be honest… I thought you might be a good fit, Holly.”  
  
Holly was puzzled. “What, why?”  
  
“I know you hate it here with all these wretched quartzes. I’m giving you a chance to take on an assignment you actually want.”  
  
“Why?” Holly asked again.  
  
“We’re friends, you silly thing!” Tourmaline laughed as though it was obvious. “And I know you’ve gone soft on your quartzes. That’s no good. It doesn’t have to be a bad thing, though. Our Diamond doesn’t care, as long as _some_ Agate is managing the Human Zoo. But one Agate is much like the other, don’t you think? Why, I doubt Blue Diamond would even notice if we switched you out for someone else.”  
  
Holly inwardly winced at the words. She’d always wanted to be in Blue Diamond’s favor. She adored their Diamond. She’d always taken some pride in the fact that Blue Diamond had chosen her to oversee such an important task, helping to preserve Pink Diamond’s legacy. She liked to believe, perhaps foolishly, that she mattered to their Diamond. That she had some kind of rapport with her and Blue Diamond thought of her favorably. Holly had gone silent, thinking it over.  
  
“It’s up to you, of course. I’ll certainly be recommending you be removed from your position here after I deliver my inspection report to our Diamond. But I can also make it less painful for you, Holly. If you cooperate with me.” Tourmaline whipped her again and the shock of feeling the pain after the extended lull made Holly gasp.  
  
"You’ve gone soft, too..." Holly muttered. That earned her another lash. Holly coughed and her head dropped limp between her shoulders. Tourmaline waited as Holly took a moment to recover once more. She didn’t scream, although it would’ve provided some much-needed cathartic release. It was just too good, seeing Tourmaline’s confidence flounder in the face of her defiance.  
  
Tourmaline was considering Holly’s comment. Then she giggled. "No worse than you.”  
  
"What?"   
  
"You're no better, are you?" Tourmaline mocked.   
  
Holly's brows furrowed. "I do believe you’ve gone ‘round the bend,” she scoffed. “I'm nothing like you."  
  
"Of course you are!" Tourmaline exclaimed, gleefully. "Maybe you're not one for receiving this sort of punishment, but you're happy to give it out, just like me."   
  
Holly shook her head. "That's the most unhinged thing you've said to me, yet."  
  
"Oh, come on. I know you're capable of thinking," Tourmaline tutted. "Weren't you made for this, too?" She stepped in close again. "Doesn't it feel good to you, too? Hurting lower gems?" She grinned. 

  
"You can't compare THIS to what I do!" Holly cried, finally feeling like Tourmaline was going too far. "Our diamond entrusted me with this group and my job is to make sure they stay in line!"  
  
"I've watched you..." Tourmaline whispered. She was so close, her breath fluttered Holly's bangs. "And I know there's been many, many times when you've used excessive force on those quartzes. How do you justify that?"   
  
Holly scowled and looked away from Tourmaline. She was going to protest, but she knew it didn't matter. She thought of when she'd gone into the room to retrieve Jay and had grabbed her roughly by her hair. She thought of when she'd kicked the Amethyst guards in frustration when they hadn't informed her of a Sapphire visitor. She remembered when Jay had tried to comfort her after the incident with the Crystal Gems, only for Holly to strike her. There were moments like those and hundreds more that Holly could think of right off the top of her head. Moments when she'd gone further than necessary. And then she remembered basking in the feelings it had given her. Satisfaction. Pleasure, even. Even when it was Jay, who was probably the only gem in their wretched outpost that Holly could call a friend. Sometimes Jay got it worst of all. Holly's silence made Tourmaline smile.   
  
"It's alright, dear," Tourmaline assured her. "I don't blame you for it. We all get frustrated from time to time, don't we? And we're made to enjoy ourselves. The two of us, we're made for this."  
  
Holly felt sick thinking that Tourmaline would group them together. Holly wanted to argue against it. Sure, she got carried away at times, but she never did anything just for the sake of hurting other gems, did she? She only did what she thought was necessary. That was all. Nothing else. She never dragged her quartzes out just to beat them. But her inner protesting voice was growing fainter and fainter. Violence could always be justified by violent gems, and Tourmaline would surely tell her so. She could come up with any excuse she needed, to make it okay. Was she really on the same level as Tourmaline? Or on the track to becoming like her?  
  
Tourmaline walked around Holly and Holly braced herself for another lashing, although it didn't come. "I always admired how elegant you were. I remember starting out with you and Moonstone. And when you were chosen to deal with those earth gems, I was so envious. Even when I saw you getting too close to those gems, I didn't blame you. I understand the need, sometimes... to possess another gem. Who can't fight back."   
  
Tourmaline was back in front of Holly and she snapped her fingers once. Her Pearl, who had been nervously standing in the corner through all of it, hurried to her side. Holly stared.   
  
"It's not like that at all..." Holly said, weakly.   
  
"You're allowed to feel that way," Tourmaline said, simply. "It must be so lonely in such a remote outpost. My stars, I can only imagine how long you had to resist." Tourmaline began to stroke the Pearl again, down her chest. The Pearl looked away but remained in place, obedient to her owner. "You must prefer them with a little more fight in them, though," Tourmaline continued. "Me? I like mine a bit more submissive. But then again, I'm not a quartz like you. I don't require a lot of fight in my gems." She twirled her fingers through the Pearl's hair. It seemed an affectionate gesture, but the Pearl shrank back from it all the same. Tourmaline grabbed her by the hair at that and she yanked her head forward, which made the Pearl cry out in pain.   
  
"Stop it!" Holly cried. She wished desperately that she'd reported Tourmaline for abusing her Pearl when she'd had the chance. She felt sorry for the pitiful creature, forced to stand by her owner's side and bear her frustrations. "Leave her alone!"   
  
"What's the matter?" Tourmaline asked. "How's it different from you?" She forced the Pearl's head back, exposing the curve of her neck. Tourmaline ran her fingertips over her throat. "She talked quite a lot at first. And eventually I became tired of it. So I made sure she'd never speak a word again."   
  
Holly was stunned.   
  
"Don't worry, though," Tourmaline added. "I made sure she could still make noises."  
  
"Stop!" Holly gasped. "Stop it!"   
  
Tourmaline’s gleeful expression darkened. She finally released the Pearl from her grip. "Leave us," she instructed. "Get out of here."   
  
The Pearl scurried away, leaving the room through the door. Holly watched the Pearl leave before she looked back at Tourmaline.   
  
"You're but a shade or two away from becoming me, Holly," Tourmaline hissed. "It's healthier for you if you just embrace it. And then we can have fun together, again."   
  
\--

Garnet and Steven were on the move, coming back from the containment area and headed for the hub of activity, the hall where Tourmaline had called her assembly. Although they proceeded with caution at first, within minutes of the announcement, the halls were deserted. Still, Garnet remained tense and prepared for anything. Steven had relaxed next to her. He even had a bit of a spring in his step. Garnet didn't mind his optimism but she didn't share his upbeat spirits. She was listening, waiting, and straining her future vision to try and anticipate any conflict.  
  
"I bet the humans are happy now that the power's back on," Steven commented. Garnet nodded.   
  
"I'm sure they are..." She stopped walking and held her arm out across Steven's chest, stopping him. "Wait... up ahead..." Garnet said. She pointed at the hall of cells, used to hold uncooperative gems. They were similar to the ones that all of them had been held in while on the Home World ship with Jasper, Peridot and Lapis. There weren't any gems that they could see, but the pair entered the corridor with caution none the less. Steven noticed that one of the cells fields had been activated, signaling to him that there was a captive gem inside. He ran from Garnet's side, racing up to the cell in the hopes that Amethyst was inside. Instead, he saw Holly Blue Agate. She was half lying, half sitting in the corner of the cell, her back to the entrance. Steven's shoulders fell and he looked disappointed. Garnet walked past him, setting a hand on his shoulder, briefly. "We have to keep moving."  
  
"Shouldn't we help her?" Steven asked, softly.   
  
Garnet hesitated. She knew Pearl was likely headed to the hall as well, hoping Amethyst would be found among the gems there. She didn't like leaving Pearl alone, even if she was a perfectly capable fighter. They needed to be together and Garnet had regretted letting Pearl go along on her own.  
  
Holly Blue hadn't reacted to either of them being there. She looked to be in rough shape, and was probably trying to conserve her energy. Before Garnet could answer though, Steven was already stepping through the field into the cell. Garnet gasped and tried to grab for him, but for her trouble she got a nasty shock on her hand. "Steven!" she whispered, sternly. "Get out here!"  
  
"I want to help her, Garnet! Can't you see she's hurt bad?" Steven asked. Through the field, his eyes pleaded with her and Garnet found herself unable to say no. She sighed at her own weakness, wondering if Steven was exploiting it on purpose. Most likely.  
  
"Alright, Steven..." she relented. "Just please hurry and be careful."   
  
Steven crouched next to Holly in the cell and he gently put his hand on her arm. "Hey... um... are you okay? Can you talk?"   
  
Holly, who had been dozing with nothing better to do, awoke with a violent jolt that startled Steven. She stared around, eyes wide, fists up, but relaxed slightly at the realization of where she was. She turned her focus to Steven and squinted at him in suspicion. "What's this?"   
  
"Hi!" Steven greeted her, trying to sound jovial. In reality, he was very nervous. Holly Blue Agate hadn't exactly proven herself to be an ally in the past, although she had allowed Amethyst to communicate with them. She was also being held prisoner, which would've suggested that whatever was going on, she wasn't involved in it. "I want to help you, okay? You're hurt."   
  
Holly blinked at him a few times. She didn't feel much like being helped, especially not by the likes of him. But she was in no state to fight back and she didn't have the energy for her usual viciousness. She didn't even have the energy to feign not being able to understand him. "Do what you want, then," she sighed. She didn't know how a human expected to help her. Holly eyed him distrustfully as he moved in close to her. She leaned back, glaring as hard as she could. "What are you doing?"   
  
"Just hang on a second!" Steven instructed. He came forward with abrupt swiftness before Holly could react to it. He landed a kiss in a rather awkward spot between her cheek and her mouth. She was about to demand to know what he thought he was doing, but almost immediately following the kiss, she felt a change in her body. The pain had vanished, along with her wounds. She felt... normal. Just to be sure, Holly got to her feet, trying out her limbs, curling and uncurling her fists. She furrowed her brows before her curious gaze rested on Steven once more. Her eyes hardened, distrustfully.   
  
"You're no human..." Holly murmured. But she didn’t know exactly what he was.  
  
"Steven, we have to get moving!" Garnet urged from behind the field. Holly's attention turned to her and she wrinkled her nose but withheld any comments she wanted to say. It seemed the decent thing to do. They hadn't had to help her. She had to be gracious.  
  
"Ah! Right!" Steven stepped out of the cell and Holly walked behind him, stopping at the point where she could go no further. Steven stood in front of Garnet, holding his arms out to her. "Garnet, pick me up!" he instructed. "I'll open up a hole for you and you can get out!"  
  
"No!" Holly cried, making both Steven and Garnet pause and stare at her. "You two shouldn't even be here."  
  
"We're here for Amethyst and we're not leaving without her," Garnet said, firmly.   
  
Holly rolled her eyes. "That's very sweet of you, but if you haven't noticed yet, we're entirely on lockdown." Although she had to admit that their lockdown wasn't very effective if the other gems had snuck into the Human Zoo so easily.  
  
"Why's that happening?" Steven asked. "What's going on? Why are you in a cell?"   
  
"You don't have the time to listen to it, just get out of here," Holly urged. "The guards will be coming back around soon to check on me. You can't run into them! They're not like earth quartzes."   
  
"But..." Steven protested, grimacing.   
  
"Go!" Holly ordered. And then, with a little more desperation, " _Please_  go!"  
  
Steven frowned but he and Garnet left Holly alone, respecting her wishes. Garnet was eager to get moving again. They had to find Pearl. She hadn't seen her finding Amethyst, but that didn't mean anything. Amethyst had been a blind spot in her future vision since the day she'd been taken from them. It was frustrating to Garnet, navigating without relying as heavily on her abilities. She had to find them both and make sure they were okay. There was certainly something happening at the Zoo, but the mission objective was to find Amethyst and bring her home. There had never been a plan to help the gems at the zoo. She knew that, and yet she also knew that Steven would probably want to help them. 

And Garnet had to admit to herself that they all owed the zoo gems a lot, since they’d helped them in the past. The decent thing to do would be to offer assistance. If they could.  
  
Too late, Garnet heard running footsteps coming towards them and she froze, grabbing Steven automatically and setting him behind her to protect him. "Steven, someone's coming!" she warned. "Get ready..."   
  
Steven worriedly took out his shield and the two of them stood their ground, preparing themselves to fight whoever happened around the corner. The gem who ran into view was none other than Amethyst herself. She stopped dead in the middle of the hallway, staring at the two of them with wide eyes. But she looked differently at them.  
  
Steven and Garnet could see it immediately. She was wary, distrustful of them. It took her a moment to process who they were. Her first thought at seeing them was that she didn't know the gems, and her guard went up. But slowly, it occurred to her. She was cautious, anyways. Yes, she knew them. She’d talked to them. And yet they still didn’t feel as familiar as she’d hoped. On the call, it had been different, there had been a distance between them. But in person, it felt more awkward.  
  
"Garnet... Steven?" she asked, uncertainly, her eyes darting between them. Her voice was uneasy, almost fearful. Both Amethyst and Garnet were startled by the sudden sound of Steven's shield hitting the floor and vanishing.  
  
"A-AMETHYST?!" he exclaimed, in disbelief. He broke into a run, crossing the short distance between them before leaping up and latching his arms around her neck to hug her. Amethyst stumbled backwards but braced herself against the impact. "You're okay! You're here! We found you! Garnet, we found her!! Oh..." He clung tightly to her, as tightly as he could without hurting her. "I can't believe... I-I know we came here to get you but... I..." Steven was stammering, struggling to string together coherent sentences to express himself. Instead, he muffled his words against her shoulder, while clutching Amethyst tightly.  
  
"Whoa..." Amethyst hadn't expected such a strong reaction from Steven and she awkwardly placed her hands on the small of his back. "Yeah, you found me... heh." She rested her hands there a moment, but when it was clear that Steven wasn’t going to let go right away, Amethyst circled her arms around him and returned the hug. She felt herself squeeze him with more feeling than she was expecting. Again, it was like there was something that remembered the feeling of hugging Steven, even if she couldn’t recall the situation.  
  
Garnet also felt overcome with emotion at seeing Amethyst again. She gave Steven a few more moments with Amethyst before she approached them and dropped to her knees, gathering them both up in her arms and hugging them. She knew it didn’t do them well to linger there, but she couldn’t help it, either. "Amethyst..." Garnet whispered. "It's... good to see you..." She tried to keep her voice steady. She knew Amethyst felt awkward being with them, not really knowing them all that well. But it was hard not to react to her.  
  
Amethyst was touched by the display of emotions even if she only knew Steven and Garnet from their call and nowhere else. "Aw, um... it's good to see you guys, too..." she said, shyly. She was blushing from the attention. "I can't believe you actually came..."   
  
"What?!" Steven cried, lifting his head from where he'd buried it against Amethyst's shoulder. "Why wouldn't we? You're a Crystal Gem! And we all LOVE YOU!" He'd begun to sniffle and his eyes were getting big and watery.  
  
"O-okay! Okay..." Amethyst said, trying to calm him. "You're right... I'm totally dumb, I'm sorry. I'm... well, you know. Not myself."   
  
"It's alright, Amethyst," Garnet assured her. "You're coming home with us. Everything's going to be okay."   
  
Amethyst bit her bottom lip. She nodded. "Okay..." she agreed, feebly. She hugged Steven and Garnet again with more emotion than before. She was already starting to feel at ease with them, to her own surprise. Much like with the other Amethysts, she felt a bond that she couldn't ignore. It was comforting, amid all the confusion and guilt she was feeling. "Wait..." Amethyst looked around them. "Where's Pearl? She didn't come?" She sounded disappointed. She was surprised by how disappointed she felt, too.  
  
"That's right, Pearl!" Steven gasped. "We gotta find Pearl!"  
  
"That gem's assembly... it must be where she's headed," Garnet said.   
  
"Tourmaline's thing?" Amethyst asked.  
  
"Is Tourmaline the one that’s doing all this?” Steven asked. Amethyst carefully detached herself from Steven and Garnet.   
  
"Yeah… It's because of me... Holly and the others were trying to help me get out of here, but Tourmaline found out and that's why this whole place is locked up, now. I don’t really know what her deal is, but she seems pretty nasty."   
  
"I see..." Garnet murmured.   
  
"Garnet, we HAVE to help them!" Steven pleaded. "The Famethyst was trying to get Amethyst back to us. They're good gems!"

 Garnet sighed. “I know, Steven... we’ll help if we can.”  
  
\--  
  
Pearl was indeed heading to the assembly, but she could hear that it was already beginning, which made her move faster. For once, she didn't have much of a plan in mind. The only thing she wanted to do was cut down every gem in her path, until she reached Amethyst. Once she had Amethyst in her arms... everything would be alright. She knew she was being reckless. But she couldn't seem to bring herself to care. All she wanted to do was find Amethyst and get all of them out of the zoo. She’d been without her for too long.  
  
Pearl's recklessness almost caused her to collide with another gem that was coming in the opposite direction. Pearl stepped back, swords drawn, eyes hard. But her stance relaxed when she realized she was facing another Pearl.   
  
"Oh," Pearl said, frowning. If the Pearl gave her trouble, she wouldn't hesitate to stop her, but it seemed pointless to simply poof her for no reason. It was unlikely that this Pearl had combat training or any offensive abilities. "I wasn't expecting to run into a Pearl, here."   
  
The other Pearl regarded her with wide eyes but then she cast them downwards, a sign of submission. Pearl frowned and stepped closer to her. "Are you alright?" Pearl inquired. The other Pearl only shrugged at the question. Pearl's frown deepened. "Can you speak...?"   
  
The Pearl shook her head. Pearl felt disgust and anger rise within her. She sheathed her swords and held a hand out to the other Pearl, palm up. "I have a message from your owner, please present your hand to me," she spoke, her voice clear and almost authoritative in its tone. The other Pearl raised her eyes again, looking at her in faint surprise. It was rare that Pearl had spoken to another Pearl, but years ago, she'd been taught the code words that had been urgently whispered from Pearl to Pearl, to bypass the silence imposed on them. Most Pearls could speak, but many were not capable of speaking ill of their owners. It was a way to check in with each other. And judging by the other Pearl's reaction, she was aware of the code.   
  
The other Pearl reached out, hesitantly, and placed the tips of her fingers on Pearl's palm. Silent trust was established. Pearl frowned. "Have you been hurt?" she asked.   
  
Two taps on her palm. Pearl's eyes hardened.   
  
"Who?"  
  
T-O-U-R-M-A-L-I-N-E  
  
"You're Tourmaline's Pearl..." Pearl murmured in realization. She almost withdrew her hand but the other Pearl reached with her other hand and gripped it. She began urgently tapping on Pearl's palm and Pearl struggled to keep up with the speed of it. Abuse, neglect. Tourmaline, an adviser under Blue Diamond. She'd seen Holly Blue Agate and 8XJ trying to help 8XM escape. Tourmaline was acting independently of her Diamond. She and Holly had started out together on Blue Diamond-owned colony. Tourmaline wanted to use the weapon that had erased Amethyst's memories on the Diamonds, themselves. Overthrow them. Pearl took it all in, trying to sort through the relevant information. She was itching to get Tourmaline on the business end of her weapon.   
  
Tourmaline's plan was almost laughably stupid. It was as though any gem could just approach a Diamond and attack her with a weapon. Then again, perhaps it was just crazy enough to actually work because it was so unexpected. Pearl wasn't fond of the Diamonds by any means, but putting Tourmaline in charge hardly seemed like a better alternative.  
  
"What can I do?" Pearl asked.   
  
The other Pearl sadly shook her head and she finally dropped Pearl's hand and withdrew into herself, hugging her arms around her body. She kept shaking her head, trembling. Pearl didn't know what to do. She didn't have any authority, and she didn't know anyone with the authority to remove the Pearl from Tourmaline. Pearl reached for one of her swords, pausing before she unsheathed it. The other Pearl stepped back, raising her eyes and looking in alarm. Pearl shook her head.   
  
"No, it's for you..." she whispered. "I wish I could do more, but... here." She held the sword out on its side across her hands, intending for the other Pearl to take it. After a few moments, she did so, handling it uncertainly. "To defend yourself," Pearl explained. "Go and hide. It's not safe for you, here." She could tell just by the way Tourmaline's Pearl held the object that she wasn't remotely familiar with how to use it. But Pearl couldn't offer her anything else.

 The other Pearl stared at the weapon in her hand and she gave it a few experimental swings. Her form wasn’t great, Pearl thought, but the rapier was light enough for her at least. The Pearl met the other Pearl’s eyes, silently thanking her. Then she turned and fled, going to hide herself as Pearl instructed. Pearl watched her go, sighing deeply to herself. Her own hand reached up and she touched her fingers to her mouth. Even when done with the best intentions, she knew what it was like to be silenced. 

 She was still staring wistfully off when 8XJ jogged up next to her. “You move fast!” she complained. Pearl raised an eyebrow at her. 

 “Where’s Holly Blue?” Pearl asked, keeping her voice as disinterested as she could. Jay immediately looked guilty. 

 “She asked me to leave her there,” Jay answered. Pearl's expression melted into confusion.

 “Why?”

 “Tourmaline said she’d leave everyone else alone if she did...” Jay muttered, wincing at the words as she spoke them.   
  
"Do you really believe that?" Pearl asked.   
  
Jay shrugged. "I don't know anything about Tourmaline, I have no idea if she's a gem of her word or not."  
  
"I meant Holly," Pearl clarified, unable to keep the venom out of her voice. "You really think your Agate would stick her neck out for you like that? Maybe she's working with Tourmaline."  
  
"She's not," Jay answered, firmly. "You saw her."  
  
Pearl gave Jay a hard look, but she didn't push the matter. She wasn't terribly worried about Holly Blue Agate, even if she'd been somewhat helpful. And she wasn't going to judge Jay for leaving her, considering how she'd treated the Amethysts in the past. 

 “Tourmaline sounds monstrous,” Pearl stated, scowling. “But I’m not afraid of her.”

 “Me neither...” Jay agreed. Tourmaline certainly carried herself like a gem of high status, and there was no doubt she was, but she wasn't particularly physically imposing. She was a great deal smaller than the quartz soldiers she'd brought with her, and stood only slightly taller than Pearl.   
  
Jay spared a glance around the hallway, where they were alone. Eventually her gaze came back to rest on Pearl. "Okay so... what's the plan, here?"  
  
With a second person with her, Pearl was finally forced to deal with the fact that she'd been running on high emotion and very little logic, which was unlike her. When she squirmed at the question, Jay's eyes widened in disbelief. "You don't even know what you're doing?" she asked, incredulously. Pearl frowned.   
  
"I'm here for Amethyst, that's all," Pearl answered, firmly.   
  
Jay sighed, loudly. "Okay, but we need some kind of plan..."  
  
Pearl scowled and she tried to think. "I know that! I... the assembly. I was headed there."   
  
"And?"   
  
"I was..." Pearl frowned to herself. "I was just going to go in there and... cut everyone," she admitted, feebly. Her cheeks colored a faint sea foam green.  
  
Jay laughed, to Pearl's surprise. "Heh, okay. Wow. You sound like an Amethyst."  
  
Pearl pushed her hair back from her forehead. "It was ill-advised, you're right."  
  
"Also," Jay added, a little more sternly. "A lot of the gems in that assembly aren't bad, okay? So maybe don't cut them all down. They'd probably help you. Like they did before, remember?"  
  
“You helped Amethyst because she was one of your own, it had nothing to do with me or any of us,” Pearl replied, her voice clipped.  
  
“Maybe in the beginning, but now? You’re one of us. I mean, you two…”  
  
“Yes?”  
  
“You and 8XM are… like, together… right?”  
  
Pearl was surprised. “Did she say that?” she asked.  
  
“Not exactly… she wasn’t sure. It seemed like maybe you were. She really doesn’t remember you, but… it seems like she does, at the same time. If that makes any sense.”  
  
“Nothing about this makes much sense to me,” Pearl admitted. She felt odd, talking to 8XJ about it, but it made her chest fluttery, thinking that the other amethysts had sensed something between them, to mistake them for a couple. She lowered her gaze to the floor, blushing and smiling, faintly. “But… I think I’ve fallen in love with her,” she admitted, quietly. “At the worst possible time, of course.”  
  
“Well, I dunno if she’s in love with you, but she definitely has a thing for you,” Jay said with a chuckle.  
  
“Ahem, well… we need to get moving,” Pearl said, remembering herself.  
  
“We need a plan.”  
  
"I know..." Pearl groaned. "I was hoping to meet Garnet and Steven by now, but they're not back, yet." She began to look worried. "I hope they're alright... no, of course they're fine. Garnet wouldn't let anything happen." She looked to Jay. "Do you have a weapon?"   
  
Jay smirked. "Sure do. I think you're gonna like it, too."   
  
Pearl watched, curiously, as Jay pulled a sword out of her gem and held it out. "So I have a crazy idea," Jay began, eyeing Pearl. "What if we fused?"   
  
Pearl took a step back, looking scandalized by the idea. "Fused?" she asked, baffled by the suggestion. Jay shrugged.   
  
"Yeah. I mean, we both know swords. We could take out Tourmaline together, too! It'd be easier if we were bigger and stronger, don't you think?"  
  
Pearl was hesitant with such an idea, even if it made sense to her and was probably their best option. The only Amethyst she'd ever fused with had been  _her_  Amethyst. Or rather, the Amethyst she had come for. She had to keep reminding herself to not so carelessly consider Amethyst to be hers. That way of thinking had caused Rose to pull away from her, in the end. Moreover, Pearl was realizing that she was behaving much in the same way she had with Rose, over Amethyst. The favoring of the foraged weapons from her war days over her gem weapon was one such indication. She looked guiltily down at the sword she was still firmly gripping. She'd been lucky so far, charging around the zoo. Lucky that her status as a Pearl made other gems underestimate her. But she couldn't rely on luck to help her, and she knew that all too well. She needed to be cautious and reasonable. She had to stop acting like a lovesick fool on a mission of passion. There would be time, when it was all over... time to sort things out. Between her and Amethyst. But it wasn't now.  
  
The idea of fusing with 8XJ, even in defense, felt a bit like a betrayal to Amethyst, though. Pearl knew, logically, that Amethyst probably wouldn't care at all if Pearl fused with another gem of her type, but it was still something that didn't sit well with Pearl. She wondered if Amethyst would ever want to fuse with another Pearl. It was harder to make the comparison, considering Pearls' statuses as servant gems didn't make them all that useful in a fusion.   
  
Jay noticed Pearl's hesitation and she added, "We don't have to if it's weird, I just thought..." She shrugged. “I’ve never fused with anyone except other amethysts, so I don’t even know if it would work. But I’ve seen you guys do it.”  
  
"No, it makes sense..." Pearl relented, somewhat uncomfortably. "It would work. I just..." She knew it wasn't the time to be squeamish. She couldn't hesitate. After a pause, she gave a firm nod. "You're right. Let's try it." She held her hand out to 8XJ.   
  
"PEARL!" It was Steven's voice, breaking in suddenly. Garnet, Steven and Amethyst were heading towards them with Steven running the fastest, to get to Pearl first. "We found her! We found Amethyst!"  
  
"Wha?" Pearl turned, baffled. She dropped her hand immediately. Garnet was behind Steven, and walking alongside her was Amethyst herself. Pearl's gaze trailed from Steven, to Garnet. And then Amethyst, longest of all.  
  
Pearl had come with the intention of finding Amethyst and bringing her home. And yet at the sight of her, everything just shut down and Pearl could only stare. Amethyst too had slowed down and stopped abruptly when she spotted Pearl. Their gazes were locked for a stretch of time, no more than a few seconds. Then she averted her eyes from Pearl's somewhat heated gaze, unsure of what to do. It was Pearl who took the initiative. Thoughtlessly, she handed Jay her sword and ran across the divide between their two groups with arms outstretched. Garnet rightfully stepped aside for her, and she tugged Steven out of the way as well. Right as she reached Amethyst, Pearl dropped to her knees, scooping her up in her arms and holding her as tightly as she could. She did all of this without speaking a word and Amethyst could feel her trembling against her body as she tried to feebly return the hug, while feeling like she was unable to return the emotional response.   
  
"Amethyst..." Pearl's voice came out cracked and emotional. It was so quiet, meant only for Amethyst to hear. Amethyst's insides were roiling. But somehow, she displayed only an outer calm.   
  
"Hey, Pearl..." Amethyst said, smiling a little. "Did you... miss me?"   
  
"Of course I did, what do you think?" Pearl gasped before she buried her face against Amethyst's shoulder. "Of course I did..." Pearl wanted to break down into a blubbering mess but she knew it wasn't the time or the place. Instead, after a much too short moment of holding her, Pearl let her go and got to her feet. She tried to compose herself as best she could, but she felt like she was spinning. She dabbed her eyes with the heels of her palms. Amethyst glanced in Jay's direction and the larger Amethyst gave a wave and a relieved smile. Jay knew she needed to back off and let them all have their reunion, but she was glad to see that 8XM was alright.   
  
Steven was tearing up just a bit at the tender moment between Amethyst and Pearl. He gripped one of Garnet's hands and leaned against her. Garnet's expression remained stoic, but unseen behind her visor, she was actually getting a bit misty-eyed, herself. It wasn't just seeing Pearl and Amethyst reunited, but feeling the building tension and high-emotions from the past week falling away. Amethyst was there. She was in one piece. They were whole, once more. It brought out a surge of relief within her.  
  
"Okay, M," Jay spoke up suddenly. "You gotta get on the ship with these guys and go home."   
  
Amethyst looked up at 8XJ, surprised. She was about to protest leaving so suddenly, when so much was going on, when there was a sudden and violent tremor through the zoo. It sent all of them staggering to one side, falling against the wall. The barely-heard murmurs of voices from the assembly had suddenly risen up into an almost deafening scream of several voices. There was shouting over it as well. The door to the hall opened and several of Tourmaline's quartz guards stumbled out, wide-eyed and frightened. The Crystal Gems immediately took out their weapons, Amethyst included, preparing for a fight if need be. Jay raised her sword, but her expression was more curious than hardened. Pearl had taken out her spear instead of her sword. In fact, Jay was still holding it. Pearl decided it didn't matter. She didn't need it.   
  
The group stood by the door, ignored by the quartz guards who scrambled to get past them and get away as they fled from something. The door suddenly burst open and a massive gem wriggled her way through the opening before standing at her full height. It was an Amethyst fusion. At least four of them, if Pearl had to guess. At her feet, several more Amethysts and Beta gems emerged from the opening, all of them with weapons drawn. 8XJ broke into a grin and she ran to join her fellow gems where they received her with hugs.   
  
"What's going on, you guys?" she asked, breathless and excited.   
  
"We're rioting!" 8XG declared, proudly. "Fuck this place!"  
  
"YEAH!" several of them proclaimed, punching a fist into the air.   
  
The Amethyst fusion turned, grinning. "Some of us fused and the quartz guards ran off like little bitches!" she said.   
  
"And Tourmaline?" Pearl asked, having to crane her neck quite a lot to look up at her. "Where's she?"  
  
"Got away," the fusion said with a scowl. "We were just coming to bust you out, Jay and M! You guys are okay!"  
  
Amethyst grinned and she ran up to the fusion, hugging her arms around her ankle. She couldn't quite get them all the way around. "You guys ROCK!" she cried, excitedly. "They've still got Holly in a cage, though. We gotta get her out!"  
  
"You guys better unfuse. You'll never get down the other hallways at that size," Jay pointed out. The fusion pouted but she nodded in agreement. Her body began to glow and shrink as her four components separated. One of them was Sharky, and Jay hugged her around the neck and planted a smooch on her cheek gem. "I knew YOU were in there, you dumb fuck!"  
  
"What can I say?" Sharky asked, grinning. "I was gettin' tired of looking at those smug stupid homeworld gems, tellin' us how shit should be done. Like we don't know how to run a zoo!" She looked over at Amethyst and gave her a softer smile. "Glad you're okay."  
  
"You too," Amethyst answered, smiling back.   
  
"We took out the Roaming Eye, but there's no way Tourmaline hasn't gone crying to Homeworld about this," 8XG said to Sharky.   
  
"Okay, everyone! We're blocking the exits! Don't let any of those gems get out!" Sharky announced. “Bubble ‘em or put them in the cells and we’ll figure out what to do with them, later.” The quartzes scattered in several different directions. She looked back to Jay and the Crystal Gems. "Should we get our Agate or did ya want to leave her in there a little longer?"  
  
Jay laughed. "Eh, I think she's been in there long enough."  
  
\--  
  
The group headed to the holding cells, while dodging battles at every turn. The Prime and Beta gems were capturing Tourmaline's guards left and right, poofing them and tossing their gems into cells to lock them up. 8XJ came up to Holly's cell first, where she was standing upright, almost right against the field, trying to see the commotion that she could hear clearly. When 8XJ ran up into her view, she took a step back as the Amethyst took down the field. "C'mon, Holly. We're taking back the zoo!" She held a hand out and Holly and Holly eyed it a moment before she took it. It wasn't really that she needed to be helped out of the cell, but it wasn't the time to be stubborn. Jay tugged her out with surprising force and in the moment of surprise, Holly felt herself yanked forward, against Jay, where the Amethyst wrapped her arms around her in a crushing hug.   
  
"Are you okay??" 8XJ asked, the tone of her voice making Holly pause rather than fight against the hug. Instead, she let out a relieved sigh and she reached up to pat 8XJ's shoulder.   
  
"Yes, I'm fine. Of course I'm fine, don't be absurd. It takes a lot more than the likes of Tourmaline to take me down." Holly scoffed at such an idea. She moved to pull back from the hug but to her surprise, Jay only held her tighter. Holly could see the Crystal Gems and Sharky staring at them from over Jay's shoulder, which made her feel somewhat embarrassed by the emotional display. She again patted Jay's shoulder, trying to wriggle her way out of the bear hug she found herself in.   
  
It wasn’t that she disliked it. The tender contact between herself and 8XJ was surprisingly welcome, and had they been alone, she might have reciprocated it more. But she found herself feeling timid at that moment.  
  
"8XJ, don't fuss," Holly spoke, her voice soft. "I'm fine, really. You're being ridiculous right now. You know that, right?" She gave the onlookers a bit of a glare. "And what are you staring at?" she demanded. Immediately, all curious eyes looked away. 8XJ finally released Holly and they stepped back from each other, eyes locked.  
  
“What do we do about Tourmaline?” one of the Amethysts spoke up, causing Holly and Jay to divert their attention away from each other.  
  
“There’s only so many places she can hide on this outpost,” Holly answered. “The only truly secure place is my room. If she hasn’t gotten away, that’s probably where she’d hole herself up.”  
  
“No one’s gotten out of here,” Sharky assured Holly with a cheeky grin. “We’ve made sure of that.”  
  
“Well… Tourmaline’s been acting outside of Blue Diamond’s authority, so I think it may be safe to send out an SOS to her…” Holly said. She gave the Crystal Gems a look. “Of course, you lot will have to be out of here when that happens.”  
  
“Alright, but first we want to make sure the situation is under control here,” Pearl answered, to Holly’s surprise. Pearl glanced down at Amethyst, who was standing next to her and she blushed at the sight of Amethyst grinning happily up at her. Pearl looked away, smiling idiotically.  
  
“We haven’t caught everyone. We could use their help…” 8XG spoke up. The other quartzes nodded in agreement.  
  
“Alright,” Holly relented. “Keep at those guards… but Tourmaline is the priority. I can’t wait to get my hands on that little bitch.” She scowled. “I don’t know what her endgame is. Maybe she’s just doing this for fun. I wouldn’t put it past her.”  
  
“Her pearl told me that she’s planning to use that weapon… er… device. The one that wiped Amethyst’s memories. On the diamonds,” Pearl explained. Holly scoffed.  
  
“Oh, what an idiot,” the agate muttered, sounding almost affectionate. “Poor confused little dear. Let’s not waste any more time. Scatter, search every room. She can’t have gotten too far. But be cautious. She may have that device on her person.”  
  
“Yes, Holly Blue!” the quartzes replied in unison. They performed the Diamond salute before they scattered off in various directions.  
  
“If she’s got that device, she’s a threat…” Garnet murmured.  
  
“It’s nothing my quartzes can’t handle,” Holly replied, confidently. 8XJ beamed at her.


	13. Recovery

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long delay. I feel like maybe this chapter is kind of on the short side, but I wanted to leave it where it was. Hopefully it's still satisfying!

The Crystal Gems, Holly and 8XJ moved together through the long curved stretches of hallway. As a group, they were formidable and easily took out any of Tourmaline's quartzes that they happened across. Holly and 8XJ were rusty to combat, but both of them were surprised by how quickly they fell back into it. Holly was leading the way towards her room, although to her surprise, Pearl was right on her heels, even rushing ahead of her a few times, whereas the other Crystal Gems proceeded more cautiously. Holly realized, by the way Pearl moved so confidently through the Zoo's interior, that she already knew her way around quite well. She didn't ask about it, though. It wasn't the time and she tried to convince herself that she wasn't at all curious about the odd, defective Pearl in her midst.   
  
Arriving at the corridor where Holly's room was located, the group was disappointed to find it had been sealed off from their access. In frustration, Holly landed a swift kick against the solid door that was blocking their way. The rest of the group followed suit, attacking the door with weapons and fists. The surface began to dent and scratch, but it was a far cry from breaking it apart.  
  
Garnet stepped back first, removing her gauntlets. Steven glanced her way and also backed off from attacking the door, giving her a curious look.   
  
"Gems, this is pointless," Garnet spoke. The group began to fall back and they stood a few paces from the door, considering what to do.   
  
"She's finished, anyway," Holly said, distastefully. She crossed her arms in front of he chest. "Tourmaline's hiding like the coward she is. I will say this about her; she's not much of a fighter. And she knows it, too."  
  
"Well I think by this point, her guards have been pretty well taken care of," Pearl said, glancing over her shoulder. With most of the power restored and the doors unlocked, the only signs that the human zoo had been invaded at all was the sounds of the quartzes taking down the last stragglers and putting them in cages.  
  
"So we've won?" Steven asked, excitedly.   
  
"I say yes, tentatively..." Pearl murmured.   
  
"I can't send out a distress signal unless I can get to the control panel in my room," Holly admitted. "The assumption I guess being that I'd have to at some point if the other gems at the zoo ever turned against me." She felt 8XJ catch her eye and she glanced her way. The amethyst's expression seemed to indicate that she didn't approve of that sort of thing. The smallest of smiles quirked Holly's lips, just for a moment. 8XJ returned it.

Garnet slowly walked along the length of the door, running one hand over its surface, looking for a weak point. She finally stopped, dead center, and pushed her hand against it. "Right here," Garnet said, looking to the group. "If we can direct something at this exact point, a concentrated burst of energy, the door should give."

  
"Okay, lemme do it!" Amethyst exclaimed, taking her whips out again. Garnet held out an arm to stop her. 

"We need someone stronger than a single gem, or even me..." Garnet explained. 

"Alright, Sardonyx," Pearl said, somewhat impatiently. At that point, it felt like they were doing pointless things. Sure, she wanted to pay Tourmaline back for what she'd done, but the original mission had been to retrieve Amethyst. They'd achieved that. She glanced down at her side to assure herself of that fact. It was the decent thing to do, to help the zoo gems, but the situation seemed to have been contained. Pearl was anxious to get home before something else happened. 

Pearl held her hand out to Garnet, but the other gem didn't take it. Garnet was smirking. She looked between Pearl and Amethyst in a way that made Pearl tense her shoulders and fight a blush. Amethyst looked clueless.

"Opal," Garnet stated. "A direct hit from one of Opal's arrows would do the trick. Sardonyx's weapon is too blunt to work as quickly."

"Opal?" Pearl almost sounded insulted by the suggestion. "You can't be serious... Amethyst doesn't remember anything! Who's to say we'd be a compatible fusion at this point?" 

At that, Garnet lowered her visor to look at give Pearl a look. Pearl took a step backwards, breaking the gaze. "I don't think that would be a problem. You have everything she needs already. By the way, I don't approve of what you did, but it can't be helped now."

Pearl lowered her eyes to the floor, feeling foolish. Steven and Amethyst looked confused by their conversation and Steven started to ask a question only to be shushed by Garnet. Pearl had gone silent and she gripped the front of her shirt in her fists. She was aware of Amethyst at her side and then felt her touch against her arm. Amethyst was looking up at her. Her brows were worried, but she gave her a smile. She looked so much like her old self to Pearl. She was always like that. Wanting to reassure the others when things looked bleak, but also uncertain herself and not fully confident in it. Pearl touched the top of Amethyst's head. She felt grounded by the contact and Amethyst didn't move away from it. Maybe it was Pearl's imagination, but she actually seemed to lean into it, if anything.

"It's alright if you don't want to..." Pearl said, softly. She hadn't forgotten the last time she'd fused with Amethyst, and what had occurred from it. But of course Amethyst hadn't remembered that. And, Pearl realized, she never would. The incident had fallen between the time she had backed up her "data" and the time she had gotten her memory wiped. Still, it felt wrong to fuse with Amethyst without letting her know about it.

"Last time we formed Opal..." Pearl began, drawing in a breath, "I did something that... I'm not proud of. I hurt you. I forced you to stay fused to me."

"Pearl," Amethyst interjected, giving her a look. "C'mon. It's in the past.”

Pearl blushed again, flustered. They didn't really have the luxury of sitting down and talking things over at that time. If forming Opal was necessary, Pearl was willing to do it. And Amethyst was, as well. They could deal with any fallout when they were all safe back at home. If there was any to be had. Somehow Pearl doubted there would be. Even with her memories restored, Amethyst was never one to hold a grudge. 

With a nod, Pearl gave Amethyst a smile. "Alright. But I'll lead. Since you don't remember."

"Sure." 

Pearl held her hand out to Amethyst and the smaller gem took it. The others backed off to give them room. Pearl locked gazes with Amethyst, and like before there was a drawn out, heated moment between them. Pearl felt a flutter in her chest that she tried and failed to suppress. She would admit that her fears over falling for Amethyst were at least partially justified; it was incredibly distracting having her there and even trying to fuse with her, in the middle of a mission. It didn't help that Amethyst was gazing at her with a strange expression on her face... one Pearl could only describe as 'utterly vulnerable' if she had to come up with something for it. She wasn't used to seeing the gem wearing an expression like that. Usually Amethyst looked a little guarded. But at that moment, she looked worried and uncertain. 

Still holding her hand, Pearl stepped forward and reached out with her other hand to affectionately touch Amethyst's face. She was beyond caring if anyone had a problem with it and far beyond the point of feeling like she needed to hide her feelings. Her expression softened and Amethyst gave a shy smile. "It'll be okay," Pearl assured her, speaking at such a low volume that only Amethyst could've heard her. "Do you trust me?" 

Amethyst nodded. "Yeah..." 

Pearl spun Amethyst out along the path of her arm before she pulled her back in, holding her arms across Amethyst's front while Amethyst's back was against her chest. Pearl had never danced with Amethyst quite like that before, but she went through the movements without hesitation. Slowly, Pearl slid her arm around Amethyst's waist and tilted her downwards, dipping her, while leaning over her. Pearl kept one foot on the floor and the other she pointed out straight behind her, her leg lifted in the air. Being dipped had caused Amethyst to tense up, but she relaxed after a moment, knowing Pearl had a secure hold on her and wouldn't drop her. They stared at one another. Pearl moved in closer and touched her forehead to Amethyst's, activating their fusion. Both their bodies became formless and engulfed by light. 

Garnet watched the fusion with her hands on her hips. She'd replaced her visor fully over her eyes. And to herself she murmured, "Bring her back, Pearl".

In fusion space, time didn't move at the same pace as the outside world, if it moved at all. At one point in the past, Amethyst had compared it to dreaming. On the outside, the two of of them were shapeless lights, a second from forming Opal. But in the fusion space, Pearl felt like she'd been standing there for a long time.

The two of them were standing a distance apart, up to their ankles in dark water. Around them was an empty void that stretched on into blackness. There were soft lights above them that twinkled on and off at random intervals. They looked out of focus, like lights seen through eyes that were bleary. But their forms were clear and solid. Pearl took a step forward, bowing her head and letting her gemstone emit a beam of light. Her gem expelled the thing she'd smuggled into space with her. She'd been so impulsive. If anything had happened to it, it would've been a disaster. In the temple, it had been safe. But Pearl had taken it, minutes before they were to leave for space. It was still safely bubbled. The chest that contained Amethyst's memories. She was certain that once it was all over, Garnet would scold her for taking it with her. But it was still safer with Amethyst than anywhere else. And Pearl wanted to give them to her.

"I wasn't supposed to take this..." Pearl said, lowering her gaze in apology. She stood before Amethyst and handed the bubble to her. The purple gem extended her arms, taking the bubble in her hands and staring in confusion at the chest inside. She looked worriedly up at Pearl. Pearl smiled. "It's yours, Amethyst. Your memories."

“They’re in here?”

Pearl nodded.

Amethyst took a moment to examine the chest she held. It was in her colors, wrapped with something that resembled her whips and adorned with tiny stones that looked like smaller versions of the one embedded in her body. She furrowed her brows. “My memories of  _you_  are in here?” she asked. She raised her gaze to Pearl. 

Pearl nodded again. Then she cracked a nervous smile. “At least... I hope so. I wish I could only leave the flattering memories of me there." It was a rather weak joke, even for her, but Amethyst returned the smile anyways.

"Can I ask you something?"

"Sure..." Pearl answered, puzzled. 

"You and me..."

"You and  _I_ ," Pearl corrected automatically, which made her grimace at her own response and made Amethyst roll her eyes. 

"Were we like... together? Like, in a relationship?" Amethyst asked. 

Pearl hesitated. There wasn't any point in lying or being vague about it, since Amethyst would remember the truth soon anyways. She shook her head. "No, we weren't." 

The purple gem looked crestfallen. "Oh." Pearl didn't reply.

Amethyst looked back down at the chest. She dug her teeth into her puffy bottom lip. "What if it doesn't work...?" she asked, worriedly. 

"Then... we start over, like you said," Pearl answered. 

"You'd really want to do that?" Amethyst questioned. 

Pearl nodded. "I just want you home and safe," she said. "Everything else... we can deal with as it comes. Alright?"

Amethyst exhaled slowly. "I just don't want to disappoint you..." 

"You never have," Pearl assured her. She paused a moment and then stumbled over her additional words. "I love you, Amethyst..." 

Amethyst's eyes went wide as she stared at Pearl. Then she took a few steps backwards, still holding the bubble. Pearl didn't advance. She stood back, hands clasped together at her chest. Amethyst smiled at Pearl and she pressed her hands together into the bubble, popping it and causing the chest to drop down. Amethyst caught it in her hands and it opened, white light flooding out of the chest and engulfing Amethyst. Pearl held an arm up to shield her eyes from it. A wind faintly stirred her clothes and hair. But it was over quickly and the light dimmed until Amethyst was visible once more. Standing across from Pearl, she was wearing her usual outfit of a ripped tank top, boots and leggings with stars on the knees instead of her soldier uniform. That was promising. Pearl brought her hands up to her mouth, looking with wide eyes. 

Amethyst took a moment to look herself over, checking her limbs as if to make sure she hadn't lost any. She eventually took notice of Pearl, but her neutral expression didn't make it clear if her memories had truly returned. Pearl couldn't wait any longer. "W-well?" she asked, her voice thick as she was on the verge of tears. "Did it work? Do you remember?" 

Amethyst's face fell and she shook her head. "No... I... I don't remember anything," Amethyst said, softly. 

Pearl's heart sank. "O-oh."

Almost immediately, Amethyst's face split into a wide, mischievous grin. "Nah, I'm just kidding!"

"What?!" Pearl cried. She covered her eyes with her hands, her emotions finally spilling over. She sunk to her knees, holding her face in her hands. "Don't joke like that!" she sobbed. "Of all the times to make  _jokes_!"

"Aw, I'm sorry, P! I'm sorry!" Amethyst hurriedly jogged over to her and dropped down onto her knees as well. She gently took hold of Pearl's wrists and eased her hands down from her face. "I'm sorry, I'm a jerk... I couldn't help it." She gave Pearl an apologetic smile and she touched her forehead to hers. "I'm sorry... I won't do that again, okay?" 

Pearl sniffled loudly and then she yanked her wrists away from Amethyst, instead throwing her arms around the smaller gem and tugging her close. "Don't joke about that!" Pearl complained, her voice muffled against the top of Amethyst's head. 

"Sorry, sorry!" Amethyst apologized, unable to keep from laughing. Pearl pulled back from her, cupping Amethyst's face in her hands. 

"You really remember everything?" Pearl asked. 

"I do!" Amethyst kept laughing but her smile faded somewhat. "P, you... you said you loved me... heh. What's that all about? Since when?" 

Pearl shook her head. "I don't know... I didn't want to think about it so I... never did." She sighed. "But... lately I've had to confront it. And I love you. I... want to... I mean, I'd like us to... be together. Assuming we get through this. I-if you'll have me."

"Pearl..." Amethyst said, her voice cracking. All her humor had gone. She was looking at Pearl with that vulnerable expression once more. "Please... please don't say that unless you mean it..." she begged. "I can't... you'll never get rid of me if you say that stuff to me... okay?"

"I mean it," Pearl said, firmly. "I'm not letting you go ever again."

Amethyst stubbornly tried to keep herself from crying like Pearl was. She latched her arms around Pearl's neck and pressed her face against her shoulder. She felt Pearl's arms encircle her. "Okay..." Amethyst said, her voice soft and muffled. "I love you too... I'm in love with you, too... for a really long time. Y-yeah... I guess we can talk about it all later." 

"I'm sorry I made you wait..." Pearl whispered, pressing a kiss to Amethyst's cheek. “I’m sorry... for everything.”

"Better late than never," came the reply. After embracing for a good few minutes, they slowly separated, looking at each other once more. Pearl reached out and cupped Amethyst's cheek in her hand. 

"We have a lot to discuss but... for the time being, we should probably be Opal," Pearl said with a chuckle. 

"Y-yeah, right. I guess we can't just sit in fusion limbo all day," Amethyst agreed with a laugh. 

In a flash of light, Opal had formed in the corridor, the conversation between her two halves having taken all of a split second in real time and to the onlookers, had registered only as a brief shimmer in her form before she solidified. Steven was excited to see Opal. Garnet was smirking. 8XJ and Holly just looked in awe of her. Opal smiled warmly at the group before she stood en pointe and took out Pearl's spear and Amethyst's whips, spinning them around in her hands and forming her bow. With a determined expression, Opal formed an arrow of light and drew the string back, taking aim at the point Garnet had indicated on the door. She hesitated for a moment before releasing the arrow, which fired directly into the door. The impact sent jagged cracks of light all across the surface and it blew apart. Garnet protected Steven from any flying debris. On the other side of the destroyed door, the corridor was completely visible and accessible. 

Holly hurried through the doorway as Opal unfused and became Pearl and Amethyst once more. Steven rushed towards them both to give them a hug. 8XJ jogged after Holly to get to her room with her sword at the ready. 

"Wait, Amethyst... your clothes!" Steven gasped, pulling back from her. "Are you back to normal?"

Amethyst grinned and tousled his hair, affectionately. "I'm back, Steve-o!"

"There's no time to explain it right now. We have to get Tourmaline!" Pearl said, getting to her feet. The group arrived at Holly's room as Holly was inputting the code and hoping it worked. To her surprise, the door opened for her and she hurried inside with the others crowding in behind her. Only Garnet lingered in the doorway, ensuring it didn't come down on them and trap them inside. She had come to distrust the doors at the Human Zoo. She also thought it pertinent to stand guard, just in case.

"Tourmaline, come out and fight!" Holly challenged as she strode into the room. The room was empty. Ransacked from Tourmaline using it previously, but very much devoid of Tourmaline herself. Holly scowled, looking all around her and even lifting the bed to check underneath it. There wasn't anywhere she could hide. The gem wasn't there. "That slippery little... where could she have gotten to?!" Holly growled. She sighed and went to her computer where the interface was flooded with various security camera footage of the various halls and corridors in the zoo, as well as the human habitat. From what she could see, not all of the power had been restored and Holly got to work getting it all back up and running normally. 8XJ stood behind her, a hand on the back of her chair. Holly felt like there was a tingle in the air between her and 8XJ's bodies, but she tried to ignore the feeling. 

"Are the humans okay?" 8XJ asked, leaning to squint at the monitors that showed the habitat.

"Shaken but fine," Holly answered. A quartz was with them on the monitor and Holly felt relieved by that. "They really are such fragile creatures, aren't they?" 

"Yeah..." 8XJ murmured, fondly. She looked to the other monitors. "What about Tourmaline? Where is she? Did she leave?"

"She's certainly made a mess of things..." Holly sighed. "I'm checking now..." The other gems, save for Garnet, had crowded around behind the chair with 8XJ while Holly accessed the security data. She breathed a sigh of relief. "The last ship to dock was Tourmaline's ship when she arrived but it hasn't moved since then. And nothing else has left the docking bay since the lockdown. She's got to still be on the ship somewhere." Holly activated the speaker system and spoke into a mouth piece. "Attention Amethysts and Betas," Holly said, her voice echoing through the corridors and causing some of the gems on the video feeds to stop and look up. "Tourmaline is still somewhere on this ship. All gems are advised to be on the lookout for her. She is armed and dangerous. Proceed with caution." 

Holly sat back in her chair, and kneaded the back of her neck with her fingertips. She caught sight of 8XJ's worried expression as the amethyst's eyes searched the monitors. Holly put a hand on 8XJ's arm. "Jay. It's fine... we'll get her. She hasn't gone anywhere." She turned in her chair, looking to the Crystal Gems. "Alright, you four... I'm giving you ten Earth minutes to get off this ship before I signal for Blue Diamond. Is that going to be enough time?" 

"More than enough," Pearl assured her. 

"I'll escort you," 8XJ said. "I'll make sure you guys get out of here."

The group started to exit the room, leaving Holly at the computer, but Amethyst paused in the doorway before she returned to Holly's side. 8XJ and the Crystal Gems hung back, waiting for Amethyst to join them. Holly took notice of the diminutive gem standing next to her and she looked away, huffing. "Go on, 8XM... you've been nothing but trouble since you got here."

"Holly..." Amethyst said, softly. "We've got the communicator working on earth, now... so... keep in touch, okay?" 

Sighing, Holly gave Amethyst a few awkward pats on her head. "Yes, fine."

"Thank you..." Amethyst added. "Be nice to the quartzes." 

Holly resisted the urge to retort and instead just answered, "Very well," in a clipped voice. 

"Amethyst, we've got to go!" Steven urged from the doorway. 

Amethyst hesitated a split second longer before she turned and hurried back to the group. They left the room and Holly was left alone. She closed the door to her room and remained at the monitors, watching the group run from one to the next. There wasn't any sign of Tourmaline, although Holly knew not every square inch of the outpost was monitored. Any of her quartzes could hold their own against Tourmaline. She wasn't worried about that. Her biggest concern was that Tourmaline might somehow get into the habitat and hurt the humans. It was incredibly rare for the humans to be seriously injured or die in accidents, but whenever it happened, it was always a headache for Holly having to file a report about it. 

The Crystal Gems and 8XJ didn't take long to get to the area underneath the habitat, were the Crystal Gems had originally come in through. Amethyst hadn't been able to properly say goodbye to every quartz they passed on their way, but they all seemed to understand the urgency and most of them waved and cheered as she passed them by, bidding her goodbye as she ran. She felt a tug of yearning. She was eager to return to earth of course, but leaving the famethyst behind was bittersweet. All she could hope for was a future where the famethyst could come to earth again. Or at least, where the gems could travel freely to visit each other. It seemed like a far flung idea, considering how long the Crystal Gems had lived in the shadow of the war. But it was something Amethyst had been holding on to, since the first time she'd met them. 

Pearl had her weapon drawn and at the ready in one hand, but her other hand was holding Amethyst's hand. She didn't seem interested in letting her go and Amethyst didn't try to get away. Although she hoped Pearl hadn't literally meant she'd never let her go, because that would've made it a bit difficult. She was happy to settle for several months, though. That sounded nice.

Once they'd reached the bowels of the outpost, they'd slowed to a brisk walk with Pearl's gem lighting the way. The area wasn't used often, so although there was enough room to walk around, the walls and ceiling were lined with piping and wires that would've been very unsightly in the level above them. 

"Right here," Garnet announced, stopping abruptly in the middle of the floor. "The ship is just under us." 

"Aw... I guess this is goodbye again, 8XJ," Steven said, looking up at the amethyst.

8XJ stooped down to Steven's level, sitting on her haunches. "Yeah... you guys have a safe trip home." She was surprised when Steven abruptly threw his arms around her neck and hugged her. 8XJ was still for a beat but then she hugged him back. "Aw, it'll be okay. I'm sure we'll all see each other again, someday."

"I hope so," Steven said. He parted from her, his eyes welling up to his own surprise. "Thank you... for taking care of Amethyst..."

"Well, make sure you guys do the same," 8XJ instructed with a smirk. Steven stepped back so Amethyst could come forward. She hugged 8XJ as well and they remained in that embrace without saying anything for a few drawn out seconds. 8XJ pressed a kiss to Amethyst's head. "I'm gonna miss you like crazy," she whispered. "I'm happy you're going home, but also sad..." 

"Yeah, me too..." Amethyst agreed. They loosened their grip on each other and finally dropped their arms. "Can you tell everyone thanks for me? I wish I could've said goodbye to them all properly."

"I'll tell them," 8XJ stood up straight, wiping one eye. 

"And Holly better be good to you or I'll come back here and kick her butt," Amethyst added, punching a hand into her fist. 8XJ blushed. 

"Mm... we'll see," she replied, embarrassed. 

Garnet summoned her gauntlets, paused and then looked over at 8XJ. "Steven should be able to seal the hole again once we get out."

"Yeah, no worries there," 8XJ assured her, waving it off. "I can seal it myself if I have to."

With that out of the way, Garnet punched out a hole in the floor wide enough for them to get though. She stuck her head through it, ensuring that the ship was indeed right beneath them. It was. She dropped through first, after giving 8XJ a two-fingered salute. The fusion landed on the top side of the ship and stood up straight, holding her arms out for Steven. "Steven, remember to bubble yourself," she instructed. 

Steven formed a bubble around his head as he had before. "Thanks again, 8XJ!" he said, his voice muffled inside the bubble. He went through next and Garnet helped him through the hole. She kept a hold of his hand and waited for Pearl and Amethyst to come through as well. Amethyst put her legs through the hole, glancing back at 8XJ, who was smiling as she saw them off. And then suddenly jagged lines of light spread all the way down 8XJ's body, causing the amethyst's eyes to go wide and her mouth to fall open in surprise. In another instant, her body poofed and her gem clattered to the floor. Tourmaline stood in her place, holding her destabilizer out in front of her gripped in both hands. The sound of 8XJ poofing and Amethyst's stunned expression caused Pearl to turn in Tourmaline's direction, getting to her feet and reaching to retrieve her weapon. She only had a moment to catch sight of the other gem before Tourmaline lunged forward and jabbed Pearl with the destabilizer, poofing her body in an instant. Amethyst started to reach for her weapons but Tourmaline stopped her when she brought her foot down and rested it atop Pearl's gem. Her eyes were wide, locked with Amethyst's and daring her to try her. Instead, Amethyst let her whips vanish from her hands. 

"Amethyst!" Steven called from outside the hole. He tried to climb back through the hole but Amethyst held her hand out to stop him. 

"Don't, Steven," she said through grit teeth. 

"But-"

"STAY THERE!" Amethyst yelled, without looking at him. She didn't dare take her eyes off Tourmaline. She was poised to strike if she attempted to harm Pearl's gem but even at the short distance, Amethyst didn't think she'd make it in time. "Tourmaline..." Amethyst began, her voice soft but betraying her fear. Not for herself, but for Pearl. "C'mon... let Pearl go, she didn't do anything..." 

"You miserable creature..." Tourmaline seethed.

"Just... calm down, okay?" Amethyst pleaded. She held her arms out to Tourmaline. "This is over... we'll go. We won't bother you again... We're gonna just go back to earth..." 

"Oh ho no, I can't let you do that," Tourmaline laughed, shaking her head. She looked to Steven, who was still watching through the hole, and she pointed at him with the weapon she was holding. "You two, get back in here," she ordered. "Or I'll crush this pearl."

Garnet and Steven slowly climbed back in through the hole, moving cautiously. They joined Amethyst and the three of them tensely watched as Tourmaline reached down and picked up Pearl's gem in her hand. 

"Tourmaline, please don't hurt her!" Steven pleaded. 

"Shut up!" Tourmaline barked. "I don't want to hear anything out of a thing like you!"

"Tourmaline..." Amethyst tried again. She took a single step towards her and Tourmaline tensed up, which made her stop. "I'll stay, just let them go, okay...?" 

"The only one who's leaving in that ship is me," Tourmaline answered. "You're all traitors to Homeworld. It's time someone punished you properly for that." Her face fell in an exaggerated, almost childish pout. "I can't believe I have to turn tail and run away... how humiliating. But I suppose there's no shame in knowing when I'm finished." She inched sideways and Steven, Amethyst and Garnet moved likewise, in the opposite direction. Tourmaline urged them back, holding Pearl's gem to cow them into obedience. She stood at the edge of the hole but kept her eyes on the group. They'd been backed up into a wall. Tourmaline glanced at Pearl's gem in her hand. 

"Take the ship, just let Pearl go," Garnet spoke. "You've got what you wanted." 

"Not quite. I appear to have misplaced my own pearl," Tourmaline said. "So I'm in the market for a new one." 

"Like Pearl would listen to you!" Amethyst shouted. 

"I think she will..." Tourmaline replied with a wicked grin. She replaced the destabilizer into the holster on her belt and took out a similar weapon, one that they all immediately recognized as the weapon that wiped gem data and memories. "It's cute to see a pearl running around with a weapon. But in the end, she's still just a helpless little pearl, isn't she? Really, all of you need to know your place. I'm quite cross that I'll have to use this charge on this pearl when I'd been saving it for Blue Diamond. I'm afraid I may not be a very kind owner to her after that..." 

"It's not gonna work!" Amethyst exclaimed. She threw her arms open, gesturing to herself. "Look at me, Tourmaline, I remember everything! It didn't work! My memories came back. You can ask Holly. She put it in her reports!" 

Tourmaline faltered, noticing for the first time that Amethyst wasn't wearing her soldier uniform. Then her eyes hardened. "I don't believe that." 

"It's true!" Amethyst insisted. "That thing doesn't work! Pearl's gonna get her memories back and the first thing she'll want to do is kick your ass! And trust me, I know Pearl. No one can stop her when she's pissed off."

Tourmaline pouted again. "Even if what you say is true, I'm hardly afraid of a pearl. There are things no gem can escape from, even with years of training. And that's their purpose. A pearl's purpose is to be obedient and serve higher gems. And no pearl is capable of harming their owner. So forgive me if I'm not trembling over the damage a pearl can do to m-" 

Tourmaline abruptly cut herself off, her eyes going wide. In her shock, her fingers relaxed around Pearl's gem and it slid from her grasp towards the floor. Amethyst dove for it without thinking, skidding on her belly and catching the gem in her cupped hands. She sat up on her knees, bringing Pearl's gem close to her body and looking back at Tourmaline. Going right through the middle of Tourmaline's chest was the blade of a sword. Tourmaline looked down at it, her mouth falling open, a single strained noise of shock escaping her mouth. She turned slowly around in a jerky motion with the sword still stuck in her back, to face her attacker. Standing in the corridor, wearing an uncertain expression, was her own pearl. She was trembling, her chest hitching with silent sobs. Tears were falling from her wide eyes. She took a step back from Tourmaline. 

Tourmaline locked gazes with her, stunned. "Why?" she croaked. And then her body poofed. Sword and gem both fell to the floor. Tourmaline's pearl walked slowly up to her owner's gem, a few of her tears landing on the floor next to it. She took a knee and bubbled the gem before standing up again. 

Steven, Amethyst and Garnet could only stare. Amethyst scrambled to her feet when the other pearl approached her, holding Pearl's gem away. The other pearl locked gazes with her and she reached out, putting her hand to Amethyst's shoulder and giving her the lightest of pushes. 

"Go," she mouthed. 

Amethyst stood still, unsure of what to do. She didn't know much about Homeworld's rules, but she was fairly sure that a pearl who attacked her owner was as good as shattered. "You... you should come with us," Amethyst said. The pearl shook her head. Amethyst was about to argue with her when Garnet interrupted.

"We need to leave. Holly's already sent out the signal. We're supposed to be gone by now." Garnet didn't wait for Amethyst's response. She grabbed her and tucked her under one arm, with Steven under the other. She ensured Amethyst was still holding onto Pearl's gem before she ran back for the hole and dropped through it. She ran along the outside of the ship and opened the door, dropping Steven and Amethyst inside before she went in as well. Steven landed on his hands and knees on the floor and he got up in a hurry as Garnet shut the door and hurried to the control panel. 

"We didn't seal the hole!" Steven protested. 

"There's no time, Steven!" Garnet answered. She was in a panic as she hurriedly started the ship. "Blue Diamond's ship is almost on top of us! If we don't get out of here right now, we never will!"

Steven and Amethyst both stumbled and fell back down onto the floor when the ship jerked forward. It took off, moving out from under the sword-shaped outpost and blasting off as fast as it could go into space. Although it was unseen by them, they had indeed cut their escape very close. Only a moment later, Blue Diamond's ship began to approach the human zoo, responding to Holly's distress call. But the Crystal Gems were out of sight and out of range of the scanners. They were safe.


End file.
